26

26-Danielle

We were both silent, not because we didn’t have anything to talk about but because there’s just too much to say that we both chose to keep our thoughts on our own. Or so I thought. Prince David looked like he still has something he wanted to say but he was doubting himself. I could pretty much see the bubble forming above Prince David’s head.

Thing is, I already have a feeling that his questions doesn’t really involve questions about the book he just read but things about his father that he wished to know.

I don’t really know much about Prince Mark, I’ve read things about him but I was young during his time of reign and I only know the things the royals wanted its subject to know. Though, a lot of people did admire him for the things he accomplished, and they all wished that he didn’t die.

I at least remember how all the subjects of Estrella mourned for days after they announced the death of the Crownprince. They all gathered at the third gate and gave this offering to send off the late Prince and I vividly remember the cries and pain of everyone who gathered. Mom said it was one of the saddest news the royal family experienced, and they didn’t have enough time to mourn. They immediately had to face the press, the council, the royal subject and those leaders who questioned the things that are happening within the royal family. They were pressured to crown a new successor and they needed to put balance within the kingdom. They couldn’t properly send off the late Prince because they needed to show strength even in diversity. That actually broke my moms heart. ‘To see your child lying in a casket and not being able to shed a tear breaks a heart a thousand more pieces” That’s the exact words my mom described when she told me how the royals mourned.

During those times I was more tangled to my academics than what’s happening withing the kingdom. I wasn’t an ignorant, I was more of a distracted loyal subject of the royals. When I found out the death of the Prince, I was sad for a moment but that didn’t last long since I wasn’t acquainted to him. I was only sad because we lost another leader that’s wise and honorable. Back then the reputation Prince Luke upheld was something of not so honorary so when he was crowned, everyone, including me was scared and doubtful. And up until today, Prince Luke hasn’t proven anything.

“Danielle?” Prince David calls my name then he drops the book he was reading “How was my father like when he was still here?”

Prince David leans forward waiting for a response from me. Its only natural for him to be curious. He also looked like someone who wouldn’t just randomly ask things about his father. In fact, I have this impression that’s his been waiting for this perfect time to ask me this question. Since the moment he thought of his father in relation to the book he was reading, I already have a feeling there’d be more.

“Well, I didin’t personally know your father I only know things that I’ve heard and seen on news. I was a little aloft back then and just like you, I would rather read books and forget about reality. I don’t think I’m the right person to ask about your father” I explained. I didn’t want to make up stories and make this child believe on information that has now sturdy foundation. He may be a genius but he is still a child, I don’t wish for him to believe on some illusion. This is why I chose honestly. If he still thinks he wants to know what I know, then I’ll only tell him the things that’s been recorded and out into news so he’ll have something to base my words on.

“Was he a great a Prince? My uncles said my father was one true Leader, that he was a man of his words and that he loves Estrella more than anything. Is it true? Mom won’t let me watch the historical records of my father, she said I am only allowed to them once my mind and heart is ready.” Prince David demeanor changed from his perky smiling self to now pouting, lonely, dejected face.

I sighed knowing full well the feeling he has now. His been curious about his father all his life and the only thing that could make him closer to him, is still not ready for his age. Princess Amber has her reasons, I’m sure of it and I would never question the way she is raising Prince David. Some events of the past are not for a kids mind. We protect our own. I believe that this is what Princess Amber is doing for the Prince.

“Your uncles were right. Before I had a chance of staying here, my mom used to work here first. Though lady maids weren’t allowed to go far from the palace my mother had a special grant from the regent so she was able to come home and take care of me.” I smiled as I continue “She would sometimes tell me this stories about the young princes and princesses of the kingdom. And on one of her stories she described your father as the Prince with the purest of hearts. She said, despite the role your father had to play, he was one the few people that valued a persons truest nature. He sees people not with their position or their richest, he looks at them base on their character. Your father was a great person and I believe you will be too someday” I sincerely told young David the things I heard from my own mother. Despite what happened between us, I still trust and believe the thing she said.

David eventually smiled from what he heard from me and after that he didn’t ask me anything else and he simply went back to reading his book. He seemed satisfied with what he heard so I didn’t ask him if my answer was enough. If he’s really curious he could simply ask those who were with Prince Mark all the time. My only purpose here is to make sure that he safely learn something new.

For the whole afternoon he asked me some questions that are related to the book and I would explain it to him, with the best I can. He would have this insights and realizations that are surprising. I now believe how magical a kids mind could get. He was curious with a lot of things and I almost felt afraid that I might run out of things to say but I really thank one of my strict teachers for making me do thousands of reaction paper to every book required from us, because of those, I atleast have something to say to young David.

Evening came and David was able to read up until the peak of the story so when we were informed that we have to go back so the Prince could start his evening routine, he of course didn’t like that because it also means he had to stop reading the book and wait for tomorrow so he could continue reading it. Its an agony every book lover has to go through. Even though he didn’t like the idea, he still listened and followed which made me smile knowing that he at least listens well. Princess Amber did raise a fine young Prince.

The car was already waiting outside when we were led out by the maids. I was told to go with the Prince but even with that, I chose not to. I didn’t want others to feel like I’m someone really close to the family because I’m not. I also don’t want others to treat me differently after this day. I already know how this will look to others and I don’t want to start a fire, I still want peace in my own space so in my simple ways, even when it’s the princess orders, I have to just decline. I can just walk myself back to the palace and avoid the looks from court ladies and officials. The weather feels nice so I won’t really mind walking back to the inner palace, plus I could do some exercise.

“Your highness, I really hope you learned something from me today. Thank you for spending this day with me.” I bowed and smiled in front of Prince David when he looked at me before he get inside the car.

“Aren’t you going with me? We both live inside the inner palace, isn’t it easier for you to go back with me?” Prince David wondered and so did the lady maids but I instantly gave them a reassuring smile.

“I am sincerely grateful for the offer your highness but I must decline your good will for now. The night sky and cold air calls for my attention your highness, I can’t help but give in.” I politely said. There were other eyes watching us, so I can’t just act the way I want in front of the young prince. Its safer that I act politely.

“Then thank you for today Danielle. I’ll tell mommy I want to do this again. Please hang out with me again if you have the time.” He gave me his one last smile before getting inside the car and his maids following. Everyone that was standing with me bowed as the car moves forward and completely leaving us all. Afterwards I said my farewell to the people who was still with me and thank them for what they have down today.

sI’m not someone who is used to walking around and finding shortcuts so here I am walking back to the inner palace using the long road. Though the skies dark, the road was well lit. There are also some officials and lady maids walking around so I didn’t feel anxious about walking at this hour.

At the center plaza within the second wall, I recognize a certain someone playing a violin while the fountain cascaded behind him. He played beautifully and it wasn’t unlikely that he had this kind of talent. After the disastrous dinner we had, this is the second time I’m seeing him in person and I really didn’t mean to listen but he was playing this soothing sound that I just couldn’t resist. Plus, I’m not the only one. There were a few who was also drawn to his music but unlike me they were already swaying to the sound.

He kept playing while his eyes closed so I have a feeling that he wasn’t aware of the crowd that he formed. Though with a talent like his, I don’t think this is new to him.

I decided to leave the crowd and continue with my night walk back to the inner palace. It was getting late and the guards might not let me in or worst. Plus there’s another prince around me and I just didn’t wish to entertain another one. Not when its Prince Luis.

I still feel embarrass for what happened between us. He was the person who after all the person who without a doubt, accused me and deliberately made me the center of everyone’s attention. He was talented and sure I was captivated by what he was playing but I didn’t want him to see me. I fear that we might have to talk and literally have a conversation that’s completely awkward, FOR ME.

I’ve been in my own zone of turmoil that I just don’t wish to experience another awkward situation and embarrass myself in front of another member of the royal family.

I hurriedly went pass the guards who happens to know me, so they just lets me in and even offered to accompany back to my place but I immediately told them not to bother. I was fine walking alone and its not that far anymore.

Without much of a distraction, I was able to return back in one piece and lucky for me, a delicious food and wine was already waiting for me, probably prepared by the maids assigned by the Princess. I happily ate and I had manners too so I immediately reported to Princess Amber everything that Prince David and I, did today. Plus I also thanked her for what she prepared for the entire day. Not just the delicious dinner I have right now, but also the tasty treats and the trust. Despite the fact that Prince David and I didn’t do much, we both enjoyed the time we had just reading and exchanging insights. Though it did get awkward when he asked me about his father, I could still say it was a successful and productive day.

I took a quick bath after that and decided to contact Lori since its been awhile and I needed to hear her thoughts on something. I haven’t told her about my little situation inside the palace but that could wait, I have other things to worry about and I needed my best friend to make sense out of my problems. A part of me longs to see her and this is the longest time we’ve been away to each other so its quite something.

After a few rings, she answered with her very tired voice and I have a feeling that she didn’t even know who was calling her, she sounded like she just woke up or like she was sick and couldn’t talk properly.

“Lori?” I worriedly asked.

“Elle?” she answered in her rare husky voice. “Its really you. How are you? I’m sorry for not returning some of your text messages. Things have been pretty hectic.” Lori cleared her voice and explained her recent lack of interest to my stories and messages.

“I’m fine but what have you been up to? You sound like you haven’t slept in awhile and now you’re not even sure what day you are in.” I swear I might just be assuming thing but if she says yes and that I was spot on, then she must be up to some kind of story that its making her stay up for days.

Lori’s pretty much dead set on working her ass off. She wishes to be known for how good she is with her writing plus she has this dream of being recognize as one of the best by the royals. Even with that fact and dream in her mind, she still attacks the royal family through her features and would go through anything just so she could get her story. Anything that has gas and would ignite a fire, she would instantly grab it as long as its about the royal family.

“You really know me so well! But Im fine and you know. The usual stuff usually takes a lot of my strength. So that’s why. Anyways, lets not talk about my work and talk about you, its been awhile since the last time we talked. Whats new?” I could imagine Lori’s face and even when she doesn’t say it, i’m quite positive that she wants to ask me things about the royal family but she’s trying her best not to because she respects me.

“Nothing new happened. I had to spend another week being kept like a skeleton in a closet, but in my case, I could be a doll in a fancy mansion” I heard Lori’s low chuckle and she’s the only one who finds this situation something to laugh about.

“What? Tired of clinking glasses and steaming tea pots? Why don’t you play dress up to complete the look. “ she teases me like she always does. Though she’s making fun of my situation, she is also the only person who supported me all throughout my stay here. If it wasn’t for her constant reminder, I would have given up already.

“Honestly though, how are you? The last time you texted me you said you have something to tell me and when I asked you what it was, you simply said it was nothing.” Lori’s tone was serious, but I wasn’t ready to tell her about my little dance with the devil. Of course I don’t mean it like his a literal devil but its just a term I want to use to ehI don’t want her to think that there could be story between us and Lori is at her best when she’s making this random and absurd scenarios. That’s why her job suits her well.

“Because it was really nothing. I was just messing with you but you took too long to reply so I just grew tired of the plan and that made me say it was nothing. Plus, I didn’t call so I could be interrogated by you. I have enough of that since the day I started living here and I don’t want to experience it with you as well. I need something else to listen to so why don’t you tell me something about your day?”

“Well, for starters, I am deprived of sleep for the last two weeks because I had to finish up my blogs or my editor would again kill me for being late. I have this story that I really want to cover so I’m pushing all my little brain cells to work their ass off and give me some wonderful juices so I could impress my boss and she might just give me the project” She hurriedly explains and by the time he was done talking, she was panting.

“How do you expect your brain cells to work when you lack the essential nutrient it needs” I sarcastically said to her while knowing that she would still have some witty comeback, even with her unhealthy state of mind. “You do know you need sleep to make your mind work, right?” I added and I wasn’t done because I really have a lot of things I want to say to her or I might never get this chance again “Plus, how will you function when you finally get the project that you so hope for when your body is too weak because you lack rest and proper nutrients” I continued even though we’re both the same on this kind of problem.

“What, I’m a hundred percent made of coffee and beans do survive even in harsh environment. So don’t you dare question me because its like you’re also questioning the beauty of coffee.” Even before she could even finish her words, I was already laughing. She used to hate coffee but when I introduced her to the art of bittersweet and chilled coffees, she’s been addicted and would even do everything for the sake of coffee. She now claims that she would never be able to function as a person if she couldn’t have her coffee first. So for those who are even planning to understand my dearest friend, they should first make sure that she already had her coffee, otherwise, whatever conversation they wish to have, it would be useless.

“Now you like coffee, I vividly remember how you look at me every time I make my own coffee” I reminded her just to of course tease her.

“And we both know that it is also because of that look that made you push me into being like who I am now. So you better take responsibility and stop insulting my very much healthy lifestyle” she spoke every word with such power that all I could do was nod and laugh.

Eventually, she too laughs and makes this awkward noise that made the both of us laugh even harder. You know that moment you have with your best-friend, those moments where you just randomly laugh without needing to know why. Its that connection you have that even without the use of words, you two would always understand each other. And this is what I miss most of the time with Lori.

Those carefree days and fun moments. I miss going out with her without thinking of anything, just being able to smile and laugh without minding the words of the society or the bashing eyes of the ladies that doesn’t approve of how we act in public. If only its possible to just go back in time and do whatever we want to do, because I no longer appreciate the days I have and those days that are about to come. If it wasn’t for Lori or the unread books that is still waiting for me, I might really just end things and go to wherever both my moms are. If i’m even allowed there anyways.

But there’s really more to life and Lori would definitely kill me again if I do something so stupid. So I can’t give up. I must never give up.

“Lori…” After laughing so hard I finally calmed down and raised my head as I walk to the glass window in the study area and watch the sky and the stars. With the the twinkling star as my only sign, I decided to finally get to business and tell Lori what I really need her opinion on. Both my moms are watching over me and both of them will never lead me to something so dangerous, but even with that I am still in need of an unbiased opinion.

“I’m one of the ladies who’s going to compete this coming choosing ceremony, I don’t think I should accept the invitation but I also don’t want to waste both my moms efforts just to get me at this point” a sigh escapes my mouth as I continued with my problem “Plus I feel like i’m in a trap… I think i’m starting to like the Prince…”