Understanding the family

Scene 5

(This scene opens with Anna coming out of her room lazily with her phone in hand and one hand in the pocket of her house coat. She puts her other hand in the other pocket and starts humming. As she walks to the kitchen, Tomike and Dayo who are climbing the stairs see her and stop then turn around and Tomike calls her but she doesn't respond. She calls her again but this time waves her hand like she is trying to flag her down. Anna sees from the side of her eyes and stops, remove her phone and pauses the music).

Anna: Yes.

(Anna remains where she is and Tomike remains quiet, waiting for Anna to come and meet her by the stairs. Anna stands still waiting for Tomike to say what she wants to)

Tomike: (See this girl oh, she cannot come and meet me). (She mutters and Dayo chuckles).

Anna: What?

Tomike: Nothing. (She gives a fake smile and Anna returns one too). Em Anna right, yes. Please can you get me cup of water. (Anna looks at Tomike's hand and sees a bottle of water, slightly hidden in between her and Dayo).

Anna: Sure. (Anna stars walking away, heading to the kitchen causing Tomike to shout the rest).

Tomike: And a plate of rice.

Dayo: And some fresh fruits.

Tomike: Oshi,() (Ugly girl. I will stress you in this house).

(They both continue walking up stairs as Anna enters the kitchen. Ene is busy preparing lunch and Titi is assisting while Kunle and Chuks come in as Ene asks as they are chatting. Ene is the first person to see Anna as she walks in).

Ene: Ah adiah,() abadia().

Anna: Ediko().

Titi: Oya, pay. (She stretches her hand out and the rest except Anna put money in it. Anna looks at them in amusement).

Anna: What's going on?

Titi: They said that you can't speak your language so we made a bet. (Anna smiles).

Chuks: Yehn, yehn, yehn, yehn. See mouth, before she enter here na you dey scatter pigin, as she don enter voice don change.

Titi: What's your problem?

Ene: Titi you sabi form no be small ehn. As you small so.

Kunle: No mama leave am. When I go dey talk everybody go dey talk say Kunle don start.

Titi: Kunle you must to shuk mouth.

Kunle: Ehn, the real her don comot. (Anna is laughing all the while).

Titi: E no dey tire you talk? Your mouth go just dey rush, dey rush. E no dey get full stop.

Kunle: At least my mouth no dey form.

Titi: Hey, kill me. Chai! You like this, say you no dey form. You form pass me guy...

(Everyone starts laughing).

Anna: Are they always like this.

Ene: Every time. (Anna laughs again).

Chuks: But Anna you wake up late o. This on na like 12 o'clock, afternoon don knack. My point be say the people wey you suppose take care of, don go to school already.

Ene: Oya e don do una. Food is ready.

Anna: On the contrary Chuks I woke up right on time. (Titi and Kunle stop quarrelling then Titi goes to where the plates are. Anna collects them from her and drops on the counter and Titi turns back to carry the spoons and gives them to each person. As Ene dishes the food into the plates, Chuks and Kunle rub their palms together in anticipation for the food. When she is done, she drops the pot and faces the counter).

Ene: Chuks pray.

Kunle: Make I pray.

Chuks: Ah no!

Titi: Abeg.

Ene: Mbok (Please) it is now, today that we want to eat the food. Chuks. (Anna chuckles).

Chuks: Father bless this food in Jesus name.

(All of them nod and say Amen and start eating).

Kunle: Mama, mama. (Some food particles come out from his mouth to the counter).

Chuks: Baba close your mouth, I no want any mixed farming in my food. (They chuckle and Kunle frowns). But mama, e sweet well well. (Raises his brows).

Ene: Thank you. So my dear what were you doing before you come here.

Anna: I was working at a restaurant as a cook, head chef. (Chuks, Kunle, Ene and Titi nod their head).

Kunle: Oshe, so you go cook something for us be that.

Chuks: Kuns, slow down.

Titi: You never finish the one you dey chop, you don dey think of another one.

Kunle: Titi no put mouth.

Ene: My goodness, you people should shut up. We are eating, Mbok (Please). (Others laugh).

Chuks: But seriously oh Anna, you get work to do o.

Kunle: No be small work oh.

Ene: With the children ba.

Chuks: Um.

Anna: How do you mean?

Titi: Let's just say that they can be the cause of death for somebody with high blood pressure.

Anna: That bad huh.

Ene: Terrible.

(When Chuks starts talking they show the people as they are mentioned doing the things that they are talking about).

Chuks: Look at Jennifer na, madam at the top. That one na case. She no just get respect.

Ene, Kunle and Titi: At all.

Kunle: She go look you finish like say she dey there for your naming ceremony. She no know who be her mate. She proud and rude well well.

Ene: She dey command person, you go even tire to dey go her message.

Titi: Don't forget the phone thing. (Everyone sighs).

Kunle: You dey talk to person they go dey use you play, just reason you finish with phone. (Anna chuckles).

Titi: She never gets off her phone. Na her dey approve all their plans.

Ene: Isaac is sha okay.

Chuks: He sha get e own.

Kunle: I no know if na e own dey pain pass. He just no like peace.

Anna: (Laughs). How?

Kunle: He too dey play music. He go dey blast the place.

Chuks: He go dey make you shout, he just like to make person dey shout. Only game e dey play.

Ene: But na him dey plan all of their plan. Like how dey go run comot from school successfully.

Titi: You go dey talk only to realize that oga dey use all those em... Bluetooth stuff. And he just plays games all day. Then Whitney...

(Everyone sighs long and loudly).

Ene: Case.

Kunle: That mama own na to play. She go destroy her room, even Isaac. She no like to put her hand one place.

Chucks: And to dey match person anyhow.

Ene: She be small pikin, I no even blame her. Na anywhere and anything her brother and sister do, she go follow do. But generally they no like to see anywhere arranged.

Titi: Especially when they get back from school, they go throw everything everywhere and anywhere.

Kunle: E just dey do them for body to scatter the whole place.

Ene: Then Oga Fred's in-laws...

Titi: Story.

Chuks: Those ones just they put leg, mouth, head all join for where no concern them. Na oga money they won collect but e no go work.

Kunle: No mind them. See as Tomike dey rasie shoulder they waka like say na her husband house be this, go just dey command person anyhow.

Ene: You no see her son, he just dey do any how. They seat down for house only chop e no, him and the mama. He think say him dey him papa house.

Titi: No mind that one. Yeye boy. (Hisses). Na him mama I blame. Make she no go find her own house stay.

Anna: Why are they here any ways?

Titi: Na after Oga Fred wife big madam die oh. That's a year after I started working here. She be madam Elizabeth junior brother. After the burial like this, they no return back to Osun.

Anna: What happened to his wife?

Ene: Accident o. Her plane been crash when she dey come back 9ja... Madam Eliza, she kind well well. She too kind. (There is a quick pause). And with all this wahala wey come dey this house those neighbours or wetin they dey call them go just add to the whole matter.

Kunle: Those ones. Them suppose bundle them throw way. (Everybody laughs). Na true I talk. Na the thing wey go good for them be that, their wahala too much.

Chuks: The husband Emeka or wetin be him name, oga go come here they chase Jennifer, e no get shame to dey chase small pikin. E no suppose comot from e house. Make light no touch him face at all. (Anna laughs).

Titi: That him wife incor, Chioma ba? She form pass Kunle.

Kunle: Stop am, I no dey form. Even though I dey form, see person wey take compare me too, you don reason me finish be that na.

(They all laugh).

Titi: But that woman ehn. Serious disgrace to woman hood. She be class one ashawo. She go leave her husband house come here con dey seduce oga Fred. But her and her husband no get shame.

Ene: Na why they marry na. (They are now seen as they are clearing the counter). But if say oga Fred dey around more often things go better. (everybody nods in agreement).

Titi: True. Since madam die, he just dey busy with work. Na only work, work, work e sabi.

Chuks: He doesn't give attention to most of the things around again.

Ene: And oga been get good eye. That time all these things wey don spoil and the things we dey lack for kitchen and around the house him for notice. Some times food dey short, na because say I know my way na I go just do something.

Kunle: That time food dey plenty for this house, variety. Now we just dey chop one thing every day.

Ene: Oga be good person oh see he even give us room inside the house, like personal personal for each person. But make him stop small look this house. E need small work...

(The whole place is quiet for some minutes then Kunle speaks up).

Kunle: So this cooking something... Anna how far when you go bring food come my gate.

(They laugh and Titi responds to Kunle then him and Titi start arguing as the scene fades out).

Scene 5b

(This scene opens with Fredrick in his office, going through some files when a man in his late 30's walks in causing him to raise his head up. He smiles as he sees him).

Fredrick: You know when I think good Lord, he has changed for the better, you just get worse.

Femi: I'm doing fine Fredrick thanks for asking.

Fredrick: Exactly what you should do, ask before you walk into someone's office.

Femi: Fred can we skip to the good part where we start becoming friends? (They both remain silent for a while).

Fredrick: Femo.

Femi: Now you are talking.

Fredrick: Femoski.

Femi: Fred the man, my main G.

Fredrick: Femo my guy.

Femi: Fred that thread with care, the man with the plan.

Fredrick: Femo with moments with mo. (Femi stops smiling and looks at him dryly causing him to stop smiling too). Off point?

Femi: Don't ever do that again man. Never. This never happened.

Fredrick: Never. (They laugh). I missed you guy.

Femi: Awww.

Fredrick: What's that?

Femi: I've been told that I have that effect.

Fredrick: What effect guy!

Femi: The ability to light up a place.

Fredrick: Don't deceive yourself my brother, there was just no one around to tell bad jokes anymore, we were all happy.

Femi: Oh I can tell. Can't you see the way you just lit up as I came in.

Fredrick: Whatever man, it's good to have you back. So how was your trip?

Femi: It was good, great actually. I saw the site for myself and I was blown away. Everything is perfect, the environment is peaceful, it has a great view of the beach. Bro if you are there you feel like you are in heaven, the place just has this certain comfort that comes with it. I could get married and have my honeymoon there.

Fredrick: (Chuckles). If you get married. (mutters).

Femi: Sorry what was that?

Fredrick: Nothing.

Femi: Good, because I will. (Chuckles). Bottom line is it is perfect for business. Williams Holdings will benefit big time from that investment. So enough about work, how have you been? And things at the office since I was gone.

Fredrick: I've been good, things at the office have been great without you. We barely noticed you absence or previous input.

Femi: Thank you, you flatter me. (Fredrick laughs). Yeah, you were telling me about some help you were going to get for your kids and home management.

Fredrick: Yeah, yeah. I hired a nanny.

Femi: Nanny, hm. And how did your kids take it?

Fredrick: The best way possible. (Femi laughs).

Femi: Man your kids are characters.

Fredrick: The trouble giving kind.

Femi: So how are things at home? Like with the nanny.

Fredrick: Well, I think. I mean I haven't gotten any emergency calls yet so I think I will go with well till further notice. (They both laugh). You won't believe how the nanny came to mansion dressed. Down to her interview, bro you won't believe it. But believe me it all happened.

Femi: I got all day, yarn me...

(They fade away as they continue the conversation).

Scene closes