Chapter Sixteen - Being The Adult (Part 1)

Chapter Song Suggestion - "icanteven by The Neighbourhood ft French Montana"

It was immature of me to avoid Dae but, when a woman's heartbroken, there are things she makes time for, and there are things she doesn't give a flying fuck about.

Everyday, he sends me a text message or leaves a voicemail. I listen to them on repeat when I miss him. He begs me to tell him where I am, what I'm doing and if I'm feeling better. He wants to know what's wrong. The recent one reveals that he knows the truth, and that he wants to explain things personally.

"Please, Aera. You deserve to hear the truth from me, not how you saw it." His words replay in my head.

I know he's worried and guilty, but my emotions are too scattered...breaking at the seams. I need space, and until I can pull on my big girl panties, Dae needs to take a back seat.

My current priorities?

1. Focus on my job.

2. Tell Nari and Hyeon the truth.

3. Deal with Dae.

Ever since I broke down at the party, I've been channeling my focus into work. Though Chang-Min knows I'm troubled, he doesn't bother me unless it's company related. Bless the man.

For my second priority, Nari's off the list since Dae stormed into her lounge. Long story short? She threatened to break off our friendship....we cried about it, and now she's coming over with soju. So here I sit with Hyeon in his living room, waiting for our best friend to arrive.

"I can't believe Nari beat me to it." Hyeon grumbles, looking like someone pissed in his tea. He's sore that Nari found out what's going on before he did.

The doorbell rings, and I buzz Nari up to the apartment. She stumbles in with packs of soju, looking like she's already started drinking. "Who's ready to get fucking wasted!"

For liquid courage, I chug down three bottles of soju before spilling the beans - how Dae and I met, how I signed a contract, and that we slept together. Nari's dumbfounded, but a spark in her eyes tells me she's impressed with my newfound wickedness. Between the three of us, she's the rebel, I'm the good girl while Hyeon's the all-star achiever. Though, all that has changed now.

Nari and I are stunned when Hyeon punches a fist into the dry wall, his knuckles bleeding wide open.

"Hyeon! What the hell!" Nari cries out, immediately searching for the first aid kit.

"That bastard's manipulating you, Aera!" Hyeon's eyes are glittering with unadulterated rage. I've never seen him this mad before. "How could you not have told us?" Somehow, I get the feeling he's disappointed in me.

"Aera's a grown up, Hyeon. You baby her too much." Nari defends on my behalf. "She can make her own decisions — with or without us."

I give her a feeble smile.

"You know what your problem is, Nari?" Scalding contempt injects into his voice. "You're fucking spoilt. You never stop to think how your actions affect others and you have zero sense of responsibility. If something goes wrong, Daddy will take care of it, won't he?" An ugly sneer twists his lips. "So, don't push your bad influence on Aera. She's nothing like you."

I gape in dismay. Hyeon's never talked to us in this manner. Sure, Nari's a free spirit but his accusations are over the top. I've been with her every step of the way. Nari's anything but irresponsible. When she's wrong, she owns up and does right by everyone.

"Screw you, Yoo Hyeon!" Nari hurls the first aid kit at his chest. "I'm not going to stand here and take your bullshit." She swipes her bag off the floor and marches to the door, slipping into her heels. "If you're not man enough to confess to your crush, then don't take it out on me! I'll be expecting an apology the next time we meet. Asshole!" The door slams shut behind her.

Fuck. This is so awkward.

Gingerly shifting closer, I pick up the first aid kit, coaxing gently. "Here, let me treat you wound."

His bleeding fist clenches. Hyeon resembles a wild bear right now. Will he listen or retaliate? Inhaling deeply, Hyeon takes a seat, letting me treat his knuckles. When I'm done, I set the kit aside. "What did Nari meant about confessing to your crush?" I gauge his reaction, seeing his jaw muscle tick. He doesn't meet my gaze. "Is it…is it me?"

Head snapping in my direction, Hyeon's enlarged eyes and taut forehead answers my question. "I see." My hands fall into my lap. We stay silent until I ask again. "Since when?"

"College. The first week." Comes his muted reply.

"Oh." I stare blankly at my fidgeting fingers. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"I guess I'm a coward." His answer is filled with self-loathing. "I was afraid that if I confess my feelings and you don't feel the same way, then I'll lose you forever."

"Is that why you decided to be part of my family?"

"What? No!" He denies strongly. "I truly like your parents." A mocking laugh escapes him. "If I knew you'd treat me like a real brother, and never see me as a man, I never would have agreed to be part of your family. I'd rather have you instead."

Years of unrequited love. I can't imagine how he has kept it bottled up for so long. If Hyeon's a coward, then he makes up for it by being tough on the inside and being a true adult amongst the three of us. He's not a risk taker, but he's dependable for life. He's a man you settle for, if you don't love him, but we'll never have passion.

"You deserve someone better. I don't love you in that way." I respond, not wanting to hurt him further by giving him hope. "I love Dae." He squeezes his eyes shut like he's in pain, but he's going to hear what I have to say. "I love him for awhile now. He's the one for me. Even if we don't end up together, I'll never forget him until the day I die. I don't want you to be second best, because in my eyes, you're worth everything." I inhale sharply. "I'm sorry, Hyeon. I do love you, but not...not in the way you need me to."

A hand over his eyes, I know he's weeping. It hurts to see him cry. Hyeon's never shed tears as far as I know. But he is now, because of me. I didn't mean to hurt him. Tears wet my own cheeks.

"Just tell me one thing." He croaks, breath trembling. "If Yun Kang Dae never appeared in your life, would you have given me a chance?"

Would I have? "Knowing won't change anything."

"Just answer the question!" He bellows, making me jump in fright.

"Maybe!" I scramble to my feet, putting a good distance between us. "Maybe, when I get over the fact that you're not my real brother."

My answer cracks him up. He starts laughing like a broken, mad man before it turns into defeated sobs. A painful one. "Go home, Aera. I need to be alone."

"O-okay," I turn around, knowing he needs space. Hyeon doesn't need me to feel bad for him, so I'll leave. Grabbing my things, I make a quick exit, standing outside the apartment. A blast of cold air hits me and I shiver. What should I do now?

With traces of soju still in my system, I decided it's time to put everyone out of their misery. Pulling out my phone, I send a quick text to Dae before I regret it.