IT STILL HURTS. People say time heals all things, but I don’t think that’s that case. After eighteen months and four days, it can still be crippling. I think what happens is you just get used to it. It’s a kind of numbness most days and then intense pains other days because you bumped the tender spot. But, Lana wants more for me than to live between numbness and agony.
So, I have to live for both of us. Even if some days all I can do is lay in bed, looking through her Instagram and staring at the pictures I hung all over our walls. I’m really glad she liked pictures so much.
“Hey!” Alex and Shaina wave to me from the back of the café. We don’t go to the other one anymore, it was too hard. The regulars looked at us with pity and the waitress who always served us couldn’t quite muster a genuine smile without Lana smiling back. I can’t blame her.
“Look at you Mr. Author you.” Shaina hugs me. “Got meetings to go to, book signings to attend.”