Chapter 73 : Dinner and the drama that accompanies it

After the butler placed down the food with a glorious flourish, I hesitantly picked up my salad fork (I think??? There's like seventeen forks here, mini-pope, I forgot most of my "noble" training immediately after I learned it!) and stabbed a small, red tomato and ate it.

It burst into my mouth, the flavor was overflowingly sweet and wet. I never liked tomatoes, and I still don't. I forced myself to power through the pain of the slimy feeling of the liquid and seeds trailing down my throat.

Goddess, I hate tomato juice.

Overall the salad was a good, standard salad. Albeit with a strange blue dress that I didn't dislike. Go Thanato's minion!

During this time, I made sure to keep talking with Dale.

Yes, DALE.

This is a lot, brain.

"So, Dormant, what are you?" I asked rudely.

What? I know when I'm rude.

"What do you mean?" His voice was deep. Like titanic deep.

I miss Leonardo De Caprio...

"Well, it's clear you aren't human. Obviously." I snorted, "So It stands to reason your some other creature. And I can't keep calling you the dragon master in my head."

"Dragon...Mas-"He started, but stopped, speechless. "Can't you just call me by my name?"

"Can't," Apologetically fake smile.

"Hmm."

"So?"

"So what?"

"Exactly. What are you?"

"...I could ask you the same thing, Deamon. You are not entirely human either."

The threat in his voice didn't phase me, "Either? So you're a half-breed?"

"...Technically." He gritted out.

"This seems painful for you. Are you in pain?"

"No."

"Really? is it like some magically binding thing where you can't spill your secret identity and I have to guess? Like Bella? In twilight? Ooo, how fun! Okay, let me guess, and you tell me if I'm right!"

"Who is this...Bella, that you speak of?"

"Mm, she's a typical American teenage girl who moves to Washington- that's a state- and falls in love with a vampire who can't tell her he's a vampire and befriends a werewolf who also can't tell her he's a werewolf so she figures it out and tells them she knows. It is a very dramatic and beautiful story I quite liked as an ignorant child. Breaking dawn, part two, was a cinematic masterpiece."

"Cine...matic..."

"-Course, part one was amazing as well. I was like, seven when it came out and sex wasn't a thing that had entered my stratosphere yet. Or births. Or babies. I knew you had to go to the hospital to have one, and that it grew in a woman's belly, but that's about it."

"...Yes, but what is a cine..matic masterpiece?"

"A movie, Frodo."

"...What is--"

"Moving pictures." I interrupted.

He seems to have given up at this point.

"Vampire?"

"Isn't that what you are?"

"Close but the [Author] didn't want multiple stories to have vampire protagonists. She's going through her annual vampire craze." I answered.

He just looked at me.

"Okay, its not an annual thing, more of a constant urge but she tries to fight it when writing different books so that they're not all the same. I'm already sharing Brian, and parts of my tragic backstory." I tell him.

"...Backstory?"

"Just casually breaking the fourth wall-which I honestly don't know why we call it that. Why not the third wall? Did it not meet the requirements for a reality bending wall?" I wondered. "Besides the point. Nothing for you to concern yourself with, Draxtacular."

He looked at me like I was crazy. I can tell we're getting closer by the minute.

"So not a vampire?"

"No."

"Bummer" I pouted before lighting up and exclaiming, "Werewolf!"

He laughed.

Rude.

"Not werewolf?"

"Not even close!"

"Shifter?" I asked with hope.

"Of a sort." He said and I gave a silent but very obvious fist bump to the sky.

I can ride whatever he is and cuddle it without the threat of it eating me.

Getting mauled or something equally dangerous is probably still a thing, but I don't think he'll kill me!

This is fun!

"Mermaid."

"That's a pathetic guess and you know it."

"...Dragon?"

"No," He paused, which gave me hope.

"Dang. Now I have to find a new permanent nickname for you!"

"Oh, the horror." His tone was dry and sarcastic but I ignored that. For now.

"Uhmmmm...Wendingo? No, you don't seem like a cannibal...Troll? But you're not exactly ugly...cyclops is certainly out..."

"Just give up, little demon."

Little? Little?! Who is he calling LITTLE?!

Soon after, the appetizer arrived. It was soup. a heady and hearty vegetable soup that warmed my tummy.

I hummed as I lifted the bowl to my lips and drained the last bit of liquid I couldn't conquer with my spoon.

"You have...Ghastly manners." Dorien Gray said.

"Not in public." It was true.

Dorien raised his eyebrows before gesturing to himself and the quiet castle around us. "Do you not consider this public?"

"I consider this private. Me, my kid, some random dude we met on the way to dinner."

I saw him mouth the words "random" and "dude" but I was too busy licking my bowl to worry about his abnormalities.

Don't judge me!

...You would lick the bowl too if you could taste this amazing heaven that Thanatos' lover called a soup.

Seriously.

At this point, I'm wondering if he put something addicting in it.

Like drugs.

Or love.

Love is addicting.

Ooo, The main course!

The entree was this amazing sauce-less pasta packed with all kinds of colorful vegetables and cheese! It was accompanied by mashed potatoes (in its own little fancy dish) and steamed broccoli (also in its own dish). How European!

"Certainly, you've known me long enough--"

"Two hours,"

"Really? I feel as though I've been stuck with you for eternity." He balked.

"Now who's the one lacking manners?"

"Your quite right. Hmm," He hummed.

"That was rude of me, I'm sorry." He apologized.

"...It's fine. I supposed my comment...was liable to irk you."

"It did."

"You're still a stranger."

"Technically, Yes."

There was a pause and I watched as purple dudes' lookalike brought in the dessert.

Gosh, I'm so full.

"We could change that," He stated suddenly, interrupting my obsession with this gooey clear jello substance.

"Change what?" My fullness?

"Our relationship status."

I laughed, "Pfft-what are we, a new couple debuting on Face-bok?"

Face-Bok, really, [author]?

I'm saddened by the steady decline in my respect for you. And the decline of your intellect. I mean, you didn't even bother to use a different word for decline! There are so many words you could've used! For example; Diminishing. The declivity of said intellect. Reduction of good thoughts. Not to mention your lack of social skills. Dwindling.

I've realized that I started that rant with the intent to insult the [author], and it continued. And I don't feel bad. Hmm.

Whatever.

"So, what? You want to be friends?" I asked the man whose name starts with the letter 'D'.

I'm being lazy, Mini-Pope.