Chapter 5- Paige

ABIGAIL'S POV

Self conscious, bitch, fake, slut, flawed,

fake Barbie, bed partner, whore etc etc. Yes, I'm the owner and typical example of this adjectives. The school's wannabe Queen Bee who's loved by everyone but hated the very next second she turns around. In short, the typical blonde bitch of every story.

Yep, I know it all. Because if anyone has to top my hate list, it's me myself.

I'm Abigail Paige McCarthy.

Age-17.

I'm 5'10 with gorgeous brown hair and amazing blue eyes. My smile is my biggest weapon. The number of boys I have slept with is twice the number of my age. Yeah, I have slept with more than 34 boys. Wait...I don't remember the number. Boys? Value? These two words in the same line? For me? Never, unless it has a 'no' in-between it. Boys are what I like to bang and forget, yep, you heard me right. I would rather use the same tissue again and again, but the same boy in bed?

No, thankyou, next.

Yes, yes, I know. There are good boys in this world who are considerate of girls feeling and not all boys are the same, blah-blah-blah. Since the day karma flashed me the middle finger, I knew, my mr. right didn't exist.

I take a swift turn into my driveway as it comes into view. A simple house, but not a home.

The driveway was empty, indicating he wasn't here, yet.

I immediately sprint towards my room, closing it with a loud bang that echoed in the empty house. I stood in front of my mirror, staring at my own reflection, taking in my own image.

Shame, regret, broken, loser and every synonym of pathetic floated in the tears that welled up in my eyes.

"Aaaaah. Ugh." I scream and throw everything down that stood over my dresser.

I wipe off the tears that fell simultaneously with the back of my hand. My frosting aka makeup over my cake face starts melting along with the tears as I continue wiping it with aggression.

"How could he reject me?!? What does that fucking bastard think of himself?! NO ONE, NO ONE REJECTS ME. NO ONE EVER REJECTED ME OTHER THAN....." The words die down in my throat. It felt like yesterday, I was soo happy and in a moment all was ruined, crumbled like the last bits of a biscuit.

My knees gave up on me, leaving me sobbing on the floor.

"Please, please don't do this to me. I really love you."

"You're nothing but a piece of shit, Abigail. What made you think I love you? No one would ever want a girl like you or love you. You're just born to be rejected, just like how your mother left. You deserve to be rejected by every human specimen." He affirmed. I stood there, hearing his words that got scripted over my heart like the calligraphy over a rock.

His eyes looked back at me with no emotion, rather he looked like the son of Satan.

He looked devoid of all the love and care he showed me in the past 2 months like I never existed in his life.

"And see this??" He flashes his phone in front of my eyes.

"With one press over the send button, everyone will have all your so-called videos in their gallery."

And that's all it needed for the leftover pieces of my heart to shatter like glass.

My eyes widen the very second he bought his mobile in the vision of my eye. I could literally hear each and every little piece of my heart break down into zillions of pieces. He flashes his phone before me, devilishly laughing.

And then he pressed the sent button.

"NOOOOOOOO" I jolted up, panting and heaving frantically. I could feel beads of sweat rolling down my forehead and neck, soaking my back. Mine breathe start to relax once I notice my surrounding, only to find myself cooped inside the warmth of my own room. I had fallen asleep on the floor. Grabbing myself up, I change to my normal clothes as I stand right in front of the mirror again. Absorbing each and every part of me.

The real me. The girl who hates makes up as much as she hates herself. The girl who does not want to giggle but laugh like no care in this freaking world. I miss the carefree girl she used to be before I met him. Before he made me feel worthless.

You're my freaking problem, Abigail. I don't want to kiss a freaking slut like you, who throws herself at any guy.

Trystan Gonzalez's words run through my head over and over again. I had made sure, no one treats me like a piece of shit after the way he treated me. Yet I faced it. Rejection!

Again!! Once fucking again!!

My brain couldn't process the term, why! Why is all I want to know?

I saw how he judged me, yet saw something different too. His words were harsh yet true.

Don't you have self-respect?? Is this really who you're. How can a girl find pleasure in sleeping around?? Are you really the girl, who I saw singing in the school backyard?- I felt myself taking a heavy breathe.-

Because the girl I saw singing did not seem like a worthless bitch like how you are one or how you tend to be one. She didn't seem like a person who is known as the whore of Cambridgeshire High. She gave the impression of a simple, innocent girl; who she was back then 6 years ago when she joined. She looked like an everyday girl trapped on the wrong side of the world. I don't know what are you. But I don't want to do anything with a fucking whore. Do you get me? But I'm not into you. Never was, never will be."

The words seeped into my heart as an arrow dipped in poison.

He called me names that I know I'm called by every single girl and guy but no one ever got the guts to rub it on my face. He just threw the daggers right on me, no fear, no hesitation.

I clenched my fists, trying hard not to shed another tear.

My phone rings with a notification. It was the school gossip board. I roll my eyes, everyday stupid drama. It was the page where you could find all juicy and latest gossips. Yeah, our school people are that hella useless.

I open the page to come across a video that stopped my heart. It consisted of me and Trystan arguing in the school corridor. The voice is unclear. But it was evident there was some heated argument going on and Trystan was mad at me. It was clear that he was shouting whilst me, I just stood there numb like a loser.

Under the video it was highlighted with: School Queen Bee gets rejected by Trystan Gonzales. She tries to seduce him but he resists her charm. School geek boy throws harsh words on Abigail, calling her a whore and slut with no self-respect.

Will Abigail McCarthy, let it go??

Or vengeance would be her next move.

- Daphnee...

I could feel tears prick my eyes again. My heart aches with a heavy load over it. My breath turns heavy. I throw the phone at the other end of the room, smashing into pieces. Satisfaction creeps inside me, how I wished it was Trystan and Daphnee in replacement of my phone. I take out my spare phone and dial the number which could help me right now.

"Harry, when's the match?"

"You wanna fight tonight?" He asks in confusion.

"Yeah. You gotta fucking problem?" I snap at him.

"Umm no, it's at 11:30."

"Okay cool, I'll see you in a while then."

I drag myself to the shower, but not before.

Strawberry guy:

You took the worst decision of your life Gonzalez. You're gonna regret it so bad. You rejected Abigail Paige McCarthy. You messed up high time. See you soon.. - Abby.

I would have let go if it wasn't for my reputation. Daphnee Evans is gonna pay real bad for messing with me.

I decided to greet her with my call.

"Hello. Is this Daphnee Morrison?" I ask her. Confused why I changed her surname?? Well, she got married to a guy at the age of 16, just because they were in the so-called thought of being in love. But the guy left her after knocking her up. She was pregnant with his kid as well but lost the child due to a miscarriage.

I have a video of them both getting married. But I never told her, because that could be a touche topic. But now she messed up high time.

"Who- who are you?? And there's no Daphnee Morrison over here. I'm Daphnee Evans." She stutters in nervousness.

"Oh really?? So you weren't the one to get knocked up by Asher Morrison?"

"Who the fuck are you?? What you want??" She cried out through the phone. I immediately hung up the call. I seem to hit her a nerve. It didn't feel right. She broke just at the mere mention of it.

I couldn't do it to her or any girl. I throw my phone on the bed, and get into the shower.

Warm water welcomed me into its embrace, as I relax under its touch. I hiss at the slight burn of the hot water against my bruised skin. I wear a black tank top, ripped jeans and my leather jacket.

I peep out of my room cautiously, looking around the house. My house wasn't something extraordinary or huge. But yeah it was big enough, consisting of a maid to take care of the house. Since the house remains empty most of the time.

I sneak out of the house and drive away to the fighting arena. By now you must have got an idea, that I'm a street fighter. It's not street really, it's a legal fight arena but only for fighters above the age of 25, I'm the illegal one pretty much. And I'm the champion. I love taking out my frustration, anger and pain on my opponent. It gives me real satisfaction. For some people, self-harm is the way to get out of pain, for me harming someone is the way out.

I reach the dark alley, several cars parked in the lot. I enter through the back gate, greeting the disgusting yet satisfying smell of alcohol, sweat and blood.

"Hey, Paige." Harry greets me with a hug. He was the one who helped me out of my sorrows. He helped me and got me to the fighting ring, after making me learn all the type of tactics.

"Hey, Har." I sent him a weak smile and defeated hug.

"Bad day?" He asks, noticing my dull mood. I nod at him. Harry had a tough exterior outside, one could assume he is cold and heartless. But inside, inside he was the little goofball made up of nothing but love and care.

It's 11:20. Just 10 more minutes for my match to begin. I'm the only girl at the arena, and that definitely bruised the non-existent ego of the male committee since I was an undefeated champion. I ain't gloating, just to confirm. No one knows about my secret life. Not even my friends, although I wasn't sure do I really have any.

Sasha was a real-time bitch, she didn't pretend to be bimbo, not like she needed to. She was one. Whilst Lon and Liz, they were different. They had a different side to themselves, but belonging to the popular committee, they were forced to put up an act as well.

I was aware I could rely on them, a part of me wanted to. But, I knew the aftermath.

I get ready for my upcoming fight. Normally, I only fought on the weekend or Friday night, so as to avoid the viva session in case I encounter any bruises... I Cover myself under the long, satin robe, and pull on the hood. I wear my mask on, in order to cover my face. No one has ever seen me until now except Harry. But everyone was aware that I'm a girl. I wanted to hurt men and bruise their balls. Especially those that took women as a weakling. And trust me when I say, there are plenty of ego heads.

Flashback.

"Ladies and gentlemen, bring your hands together for a round of applause for a new member, who has decided to join our team. Welcome, Paige." Harry introduces me to the crowd.

"Now, can I hear some cheers for our champion. James Leo." The crowd goes wild at his name. I expect him the former champion. I eye him as he does the name.

His laughter stills the crowd to a halt.

"Seriously Harry." His tone dripping with disappointment. This skinny will fight me. What has he come for? To get admitted to the hospital?"

"Time will decide that James. Don't judge a book by its cover."

We both stand against each other.

"Best of luck champion," James says with a mocking smile.

"Good luck to you too. Soon to be ex-champion."

I was beyond nervous, the guy was awfully bulky and huge.

The bell rings signaling us to get started. The crowd chants James name louder and louder with support.

James wastes no time at throwing a punch straight toward my face. I dodge it without any trouble and succeed in throwing a punch down his abdomen. He sucks a lot of air in, making it evident that he wasn't expecting such a blow.

I think-I think, now I can say hello to my confidence.

The cheering stopped, the crowd reflected shock, that I threw such a hard punch to their favorite.

He gets back steady, pure rage written on his face.

"You think you can win against me. Your nothing but a piece of shit." James says.

Well, fuck confidence, I was going to end him and I had never been so determined about it.

With all the force, without wasting a single second, I kick him hard on his abdomen again and then punch on his lower arm which was already bruised. I had spotted his weak areas whilst I scanned him and chose to not hurt him on his sore spots unless necessary. But right now all I wanted to hear was the shout for mercy and pain.

I sent another punch on his nose and then a kick on his shoulder that pretty much broke with a loud and satisfying crack. He fell down to the ground, as I took that as my chance to climb over his stomach, and throw punches after punches on his face. He tries to dodge them but his hands didn't support him well enough.

The crowd was quiet whilst I continued throwing punches at him, taking out all my frustration, all the build-up rage, all the pain just to feel the little satisfaction of winning over a guy.

"I AM NOT A PIECE OF SHIT. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!!" I emphasize on each word as his eyes widen up.

"You are a girl?" He asks in disbelief.

I wink at him through my mask, since my eyes were obviously visible and throw another hard jab to knock him off.

"And people, we have a new champion. Paige!!" The crowd screams in enthusiasm and support. I pull my hood down as long brown hair whirls down till my waist.

The crowd gasps in unison, not expecting a girl to join the rings. It was true I wanted to hide my identity, but I also wanted to rub the fact that girls were not to be treated like trash.

"Surprised I guess?" Harry asks laughing humorously.

"Put hands together for our new champion. Paige."

"But she's a girl." Some stereotypical asshole screams amongst the crowd. I take the mic off the grip of Harry.

"Well, first hello everyone. And whoever screamed from amongst the crowd, your ego isn't ready to admit that a girl defeated a guy? Lemme say ya then, you came out of the vagina of a woman, fed on a woman's breasts until they were raw, raised by a woman, nourished by a woman and someday will die in the arms of a woman who had looked after you when your mother was no longer around. If a woman can bring up assholes like you, I think a woman can succeed in making you suck your balls at your own game as well."

Everyone burst into a chorus of laughter. Impressed by my Lil talk. I felt confident but overwhelmed at the time.

"Why don't you remove your mask off?" Some girl asks.

"I don't want my identity to be revealed." She nodded in understanding.

I draw my hood up and walk off the ring, as everyone chants my name.

Ever since that day I have always been the champion here. Ever since 4 years.

It's your call, Paige. Paige was my mom's name and my middle name. Every time this name felt like home, unlike Abigail. It felt like a slap of various labels over my face that didn't belong to me but at the same time, I had no choice but to embrace them.

I walk through the dark narrow pathway towards the square ring that shaped me and helped me to escape my troubles, even if it was for a while.

"Here comes the undefeated champion of the league. Paige!!" The crowd goes ecstatic and chants my name loudly. I smirk in satisfaction and contentment.

My opponent was, as usual, a guy with a built-up body, who was cockily displaying his muscles to the crowd as the girls drooled over them over dramatically. Another overconfident self-obsessed asshole. I look around his body, checking out for his weak points.

And bingo! I found 4 already. This guy should be really easy. The guy looks at me, giving a look, I know you're checking me out.

He walked up to me holding his overconfident smirk, oblivious to the fact he wouldn't be able to display one for a couple of days. He shakes my hand a bit too hard, obviously expecting me to flinch. Like hell motherfucker, I'm undefeated for a reason.

"Good luck, baby." My opponent wishes me viciously.

"Harry-I calls out for him- what's this guy's name??" I ask giving him a look.

This obviously hurt his ego, he was shocked that I didn't even bother to know his name yet.

"Leo." The show-off replies before Harry.

"Then Leo, I prefer you to keep your best of luck with yourself. You truly need it." I smirk and back away from him.

Ding!!

And that's a signal. Bye-bye smirk pants.

Leo comes onto me first and with a swift move, I dodge me. I elbow him hard on his back and throw a kick on his knees. He stumbles back but regains his composure.

He comes to punch me but I notice the slight movement in his leg. He was trying to trick me. Before he could go for any action, I punch him right in his jaw. It already had a bruise from earlier. And I just renovated it.

I throw another punch on his nose, cutting his lip at the same time.

Blood started to ooze out of his lip and mouth. He blinked several times, pretty much evident that he was about to lose consciousness, yet he wasn't ready to give up. Impressive, I must say.

I throw the last roundhouse and he was fair and square flat on the ground. I should start asking my opponents how did it feel like to kiss the ground.

The crowd erupts into joy, screaming and cheering for me.

"We have our winner again. Paige as always." Harry announces. I sigh with satisfaction, my anger and frustration subsiding down.

I take my hood off, as always, my long hair falling down to my waist.

I wave at the crowd and get down the ring, walking towards my room. I throw a smug look towards my opponent. I hate stereotypes, who think girls can't do the stuff boys can or boys can't be doing the stuff like dance, cooking etc.

I get inside my room throwing the mask across the room. His words wouldn't stop ringing in my hear. For the first time, even boxing had failed to distract me.

You're my freaking problem, Abigail. I don't want to kiss a freaking slut like you, who throws herself at any guy.

I clench my fists, nails digging into my flesh. I wanted to fight again and again until I lost all the built-up rage Trystan Gonzales had given birth to. I search for my mask, misplacing it probably. Well, a great way to boost my annoying rage.

I hear the door swing open and shut in a to and fro motion.

"Harry, where the fuck is my mask?!?" I ask him, even though I'm the one who misplaced it.

This was very much me. I had this horrible problem of lashing out my anger on others. I didn't care who it was or was the person responsible for the actions either. I just lashed it all out, and it always helped me calm myself down. I didn't have anger issues, but I had my trigger moments.

"Harry, pass my damn fucking mask. My day has gone sucking enough, don't ruin it any further." I deadpanned, but again the only reply I get is silence. This bitch, all the assholes have decided to bug me on the same fucking day.

"Harry you- fuck!!" I freeze at the sight My eyes almost bulge out at the 6-foot figure standing right in front of me. His expression, mirroring mine. Fuck, not again, God damn it.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" I exclaim, totally perplexed.

At this stage, I was totally vulnerable. He could say everyone about me being a street fighter.

"I- aah- I got lost. I'll le- leave right away."

Before I could register, he had already bolted out of the door. I call for him but he doesn't bother turning back. I pull open the door but realize that I didn't have my mask on. I look around for it, luckily finding it at the corner of the room, behind my treadmill. All because of one mask. I rush through the door, dodging people out of my way.

" Hey, that's Paige." I hear people exclaim. As if the situation had to get any more annoying, everyone tried to touch me or get my mask off me.

I wriggled myself out amidst the overexcited and nosy crowd only to find him gone.

By the time I got outside, he was nowhere in sight.

I rush back to my room, throw all my belongings and dash out of the arena. I had lost the will to fight, right now if I wanted to do something was murder someone and not just at one go. Sitting inside my car, I rest my head on the car steering wheel. In less than one single day, Trystan Gonzales found out almost all my secrets.

Yes almost!! There's more.

I drive back home, not following any traffic rules, neither stopping at any signal.

I park the car in my driveway, as I come across the sight of my father's car being parked at the corner. Without making any noise, I start climbing the pipe that leads to my room.

Wondering why I'm sneaking inside my own home?? Well, long story and I'm too lazy right now. I get inside my room, change my clothes and make a leap towards my bed.

I close my eyes right when I hear the twist of the doorknob. I clench onto the soft blanket over my body, feeling his hard gaze on me which made me nauseous. I grip hard on my sheets, as I feel his steps and presence growing closer and closer. I could feel my breath get heavier and alert in his presence. His nasty breath fell right on my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

The smell of cocaine, tobacco, marijuana filled my nostrils, corrupting my lungs. I wanted to vomit so bad; the smell was so foul that a bread containing fungi would be more hygienic to intake than the air that he breathed out.

I grip harder on the sheets, waiting for him to leave. I find his rough hands move up slowly, from the bottom of my knee. I refrain myself from any movement, although I wanted to do nothing but cut his hands off and feed to the octopus in Peter Pan.

He never treated me well, at least for as long as I have known. The guy who was partially responsible for my existence in this world. The so-called person whose DNA I share. The guy who killed my mom right in front of my eyes without thinking twice. His hands climb up my hand as he hovers over me. His breath fanning over my neck.

"Hmm, you would really make a good item to be sold." My so-called biological father said out aloud. I almost gasped at his suggestion.

My father to you all, ladies and gentlemen. I hated his existence, the insecurities he made me go through. The way he stared at me like I wasn't his daughter but a prostitute at the cheapest bar. I felt his lips lingering closely against my neck as I lay there helplessly. I wanted to cut his dick and tie it around his throat until he choked but that wasn't an option. At least not until I was legal to leave.

I finally breathe out a sigh of relief as I hear the door click shut. I felt like someone had thrown me inside a dungeon filled with hungry and dirty men as his filthy smell still lingered around.

You must be expecting me to shed tears and cry myself to sleep. Then no. To be honest, what I feel right now is numb. His words don't surprise me anymore.

I open the drawer. Taking out my mom's picture. She was the only one to whom my emotions responded. I felt normal when I looked at her like I had a heart, I was capable of showing feelings.

"I miss you ma." I let the tears stain my face again, waiting for sleep to overtake me. The only family I have left with me is my uncle, Jonathan Woodsgate.

And who is Jonathan Woodsgate is a story for another day.