CHAPTER XXXIII: Steps of a Family

Months had passed since the Sports Festival slash Foundation Day took place.

There weren't many things worth mentioning.

Everyone returned to their original situations.

Like a switch had been turned off and all of the students returned to normal.

Although, I guess there were minimal transformations here and there.

For example, gossip.

Although it's not particularly new, the only thing that made me note this is that the center of those daytime talk shows revolved around me.

People who used to laugh at me or judge me in their own scrutinizing ways turned into calm lambs that now want to take part in my graces.

The girls who used to bully me?

Well, they still come and go, but they now present themselves with less hostility.

Even the professors acknowledged my presence more.

Of course, this all weirded me out.

It's not like I adore garnering their fake attention and hypocritical favors.

Second would be my brother's persuasive attitude.

Everytime I come home, it's still slightly awkward, but my brother continuously greets me every now and then.

I guess he always does that but this time it occurs more often than seldom.

Third, Haru speaking quota increases each day.

Of course, it only happens when he's with us.

Solar…well she's got into a boy craze phase as of late. She kept going on about how there are two hunks in our circle but not one of them is available for her.

When I asked what her basis was, she just said that…

"Well, Haru is the cute, shy type so it's kinda hard to taint his innocent aura. Then, Ross, our pal over here, only has eyes for you, if that ain't obvious enough? So…this has come to a conclusion that I'll definitely find the hottie of my dreams that can compete with your loverboy."

I smacked her head after she told me that.

Lastly, Ross.

Well, he certainly did become closer to me. However, not to the point we're labeled as lovers.

Plus, I can't really grasp his intentions.

He's naturally made like that - a congenial person.

Everybody just flocks towards him. He's also well-mannered, kind, the typical boy-next-door guy.

I sometimes wonder if he's genuine, yet there's always something binding me…

…and that's 'disappointment.'

It's an occurrence, a reaction that happens to anybody, including myself.

As what's believed by society, anything that is questioned welcomes it's unexpected disappearance.

Because once I doubt it's sincerity, the foundation it's built upon, crumbles relentlessly.

So, here I am, just going with the flow.

Besides, it's not as if I'm craving for love or a relationship.

That's basically what went around during the past couple of months.

We are now entering the last half of our first semester.

Christmas is just right around the corner, along with the accustomed New Year celebration.

We were done with our finals and we're now planning for the holidays.

"How about a trip somewhere?" Solar suggested.

"Define somewhere." I said and scanned through the hundreds of travel brochures she brought with her.

"Somewhere hot, maybe? Or we could venture into the cold and go skiing?" She slid a ton of brochures near me and gave the others to Ross and Haru.

"Won't you have family gatherings?" Ross asked.

"Not really. My parents are travelling to our home country again and I seriously don't wanna see my aunt." She shivered in disgust.

Witnessing this, Ross inquired, "Why? What's wrong with your aunt?"

"Well, aside from being a fat douchebag and a demonic bitch? Not much." She shrugged.

"Understandable. We all have that, one relative or the other. How about you?" He turned towards me.

"You could guess." Was my only reply.

"Yeah, we could already see the answer. What about you, Haru?" Solar called out to Haru who was quietly sitting opposite to where I sat.

"Um…I want to join, but…" He hesitated.

This made all of us curious and focused all our attention on him.

"Do you have something going on during Christmas?" Ross started.

"Ah…my family is celebrating together and well, um, it's an annual get-together."

After he answered, Solar and Ross looked slightly disheartened with that.

"Where do you live, Haru?" I asked.

"Japan."

I nodded and picked up a travel pamphlet on the table.

Solar and Ross began to bombard him with questions about his hometown whilst I leisurely took my time to gloss over the paper's contents.

Flipping the last page of the brochure, I tossed it on the table once I was done.

"We can just go to Japan." Their noisy chattering came to a halt after hearing what I declared.

They all looked at me in shock.

I raised my eyebrow. "What?"

"Really?! Should we?!" Solar was the first one to break her staring and jumped enthusiastically.

"Only if it's alright with Haru?" I fixed my gaze on the person mentioned and he was still somewhat bewildered.

"I mean, this way, we could hang out with Haru and he can still be with his family at the same time. In addition to that, we could simply just enjoy what Japan has to offer, right? It's a win-win for me, if you ask me." I explained.

Hearing that, Ross and Solar agreed instantly.

I remained quiet and waited for Haru to speak up.

He smiled warmly and nodded. "Thank you…"

That's how we began to plan our trip for the holidays.

It was only cut short when the bell rang.

All of us stood up and gathered our things.

While I waited for Solar to finish picking up her numerous brochures, I decided to interview one more person in this group.

"How about you? Don't you have plans?" Ross glanced at me and grinned.

"None that I could think of. Why? Getting curious now, ain't ya?" He smirked.

I threw one of the brochures at him.

"I was just being considerate." I rolled my eyes.

"You're being considerate? Then, why do you look the most pleased to go on this trip?"

"Can't I be?"

"Not if you don't admit that you've been pinning to go there for who knows how long." He urged me to disagree.

I narrowed my eyes at him in annoyance.

"Shut up. Who wouldn't want to go there anyway?" He only chuckled at me.

When Solar was finally done, we all headed out to our designated classrooms.

Solar and I were in similar classes so we went there together.

"I didn't know Haru was from Japan."

"Figured from all the bentos he brought." Remembering all those stacked layers of goodness brings pleasant memories.

"I wanted to go to Seoul too." She added.

"Are you from Seoul?"

She looked confused for a second.

"No?"

"Sucks to be you." I smirked.

She frowned at me and sent an obvious glare my way.

"I hate you."

"Me? Always." I flipped my hair and walked past her.

She soon followed suit, cursing me as she did.

A week later, classes had officially ended for this semester.

We are now welcoming the winter vacation that we dearly longed for.

We agreed to meet up tomorrow, the twentieth, at the airport.

During the past few days, all of us made sure to check our belongings and everything we needed for the trip.

Haru was also going to fly with us which made us extremely delighted.

Finishing up the last few things that I wanted to pack, I decided to tidy up right away.

I was feeling a little hungry, so I checked my luggage one last time and headed downstairs to find something to eat.

It was exactly time for dinner. This means the probability of Forden being at the dinner table was high.

And I was right on the dot.

My brother was sitting on the first seat on the left side of the long marbled table.

When he saw me enter the room, he immediately smiled at me and gestured for me to join him.

Since I was going away tomorrow, maybe I could appeal to him this time?

I breathed calmly and sat in my designated place.

The helpers hurriedly arranged the plates and utensils that I required.

The table was filled with delicious food which made me have a hard time choosing.

I thought we were going to silently mind our own plates but that was soon deemed wrong when he talked to me.

"I heard you were going somewhere?" He asked as he paused from eating.

"Yeah." I replied and ate another spoonful of food.

"Where?"

"Japan."

"Aren't you going to stay here?" This made me stop.

I placed my utensils down and looked at him.

"There's nothing for me to celebrate here."

"You have me. Mom and dad are also going home for Christmas." I froze.

"More reason for me to not be here." I diverted my gaze away from him.

"You know they're not really mad at you, right?" He tried to reach for my hand but I swiftly avoided the contact.

"There you go again. Creating your own conclusions."

"Aren't you the same?" His eyebrows began to furrow.

"Mine was never baseless." I gritted.

"But filled with pessimism!" He emphasized.

I was taken aback by what he just stated.

"Because it is the truth! Why they left, why they never came back, and why they never asked about me was all because it's true!"

"True what? That they despise their only daughter?!" He shouted desperately.

I stood up in frustration and unknowingly slammed my hands on the table.

"What else?! You didn't see how they acted towards me, so you have no right to tell me how I should perceive them!" I yelled back.

"For God's sake! You're their daughter! Their child! How can the-"

"Well, fuck that! Just because they gave birth to me doesn't mean they can't treat me as anything else! Not all families are considered picture perfect in your eyes!"

Shit!

Just fucking great!

He was appalled by what I just said. Maybe I was harsh but he should be slapped with facts.

I tried to calm my breathing, however, my annoyance couldn't dissipate that easily.

"You think I'm pessimistic? Thankfully, I am, because I can handle realistic situations better than what you are made to believe." With my appetite lost, it seemed unnecessary to stay here any longer.

I gave him a final glare and pushed back my chair rather forcefully.

With heavy steps, I climbed my way back to my room and tossed myself in my bed.

Just when things were turning more favorable, this just had to happen.

Who is it that couldn't handle reality?

I'm as confused as you are.

But that day, my mind was clear.

Unfortunately, the day they voiced their cries was the day you and I can never, again, be of equal footing.

And that's what you failed to see.