A subconscious desire

The next day Noah and Laila woke up feeling refreshed, despite having only slept a few short hours. They woke up with a smile on their face, ready to start another day. After sharing a peaceful breakfast together, Noah headed off to work, while Laila started working on her dress again. They were both working a few hours, when Anthony and Rebecca woke up from their first night together.

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At first Rebecca had been very resistant at sharing a room together, but when she heard that there were at least two separate beds, she relented. Under some internal protest, she made her way into the room and followed Anthony in unpacking the necessities. While they did that, they didn't speak much, although Anthony did glance back at her over his shoulders, to see how Rebecca was doing. He knew that them sharing a room would not leave her unaffected, but he didn't think she would take it this bad. He was feeling quite helpless, and he didn't know how to move their relationship further without pushing Rebecca too far out of her comfort zone. He thought this had been the perfect compromise, but seeing as she was still looking distressed, he wasn't so sure anymore.

Anthony went into the bathroom first in order to allow Rebecca to calm her nerves. When he came out, she quickly jumped in. Still dressed in her day clothes and her PJ's in hand. By the time she had finished what she needed to do in the bathroom, and returned to the room, Anthony was already asleep. Or at least pretending to be so. He had closed his eyes and had turned his back towards where her bed was standing. His bedside light had been turned off and she heard his shallow breathing.

Anthony had indeed only pretended to be asleep and his eyes opened when he heard Rebecca get under the sheets of her own bed. Not wanting to push the distressed Rebecca any further, either intentionally or by accident, Anthony felt it was best if he didn't do anything at all. And just let Rebecca be for today. Let her adjust to the situation at her own speed, without feeling the pressure of having to act 'normal' around him or pushing herself to interact with him out of guilt. This was the best thing to do in that moment in his eyes, and so he did it.

But despite him taking it so well, it didn't mean that it hadn't hurt his feeling a bit. He had looked forward to this day all night yesterday, thinking it would be a good chance for them to bond more as a couple, even if they just spent the night talking, but it had only made Rebecca upset. However, instead of letting the situation get him down, he balled his fist and with a look of determination said in himself, 'It is not over yet! There is still tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that. This is only just the beginning. What I didn't succeed in today, I will attempt again the next day. Slowly, step by step, we will grow closer. This just shows there is plenty more for me to learn, and for Rebecca, I am happy to learn however many lessons there is for me to learn.'

Over on the other side of the room, was stealing glances of his back. Looking over carefully every few seconds, as if wanting to make sure he was really asleep, but at the same time not believing it to be true. After a few minutes of looking over, looking away, and repeating the process, Rebecca laid down and attempted to fall asleep. But where she had been so tired before, she found herself wide awake right now. Her heart was beating loudly at the thought that Anthony was just in the next bed. If she was any taller, she could have probably touched him. That is how close he was lying next to her.

However, as time continued to pass, and Anthony had managed to fall asleep for real, Rebecca's feelings on their sleeping situation began to change. Slowly, the sight that had made her heart beat wildly, was now calming her down. No matter how many times she told herself she should close her eyes and go the sleep, her eyes kept being drawn to the silhouette of Anthony's back, that was softly moving with each breath he took. It was almost hypnotic, and without being fully aware of what she was doing, her hand escaped from under the covers and instinctively reached over to touch Anthony's back. It was as if she was in a trance. Whether it was caused from sleep deprivation, a subconscious desire or an unexplainable type of disappointment from a girl in love, that her husband to be had actually not attempted anything and had managed to fall asleep so peacefully while she had been too nervous to even close one eye.

Either way, her hand seemed to be a hand with a plan. One that had been set into motion without her consent, but with the backing of some corner of her heart and brain. Her hand was just an inch or two away from reaching Anthony's back, when he suddenly turned around and laid flat on his back. Startling Rebecca in the process, who immediately retreated her hand, and held it pressed against her chest with the other. Her newly calmed heart, jumping back into overdrive.