C-h-a-p-t-e-r: 4
'After more then 6 hours she finally got up from being faint, when she went into the kitchen to drink some water she started to hallucinate again. she started to hear voices like some one is calling her name in anger, and some voices that was saying.You don't deserve to live madison, i don't want my kids to play with such a girl like you, worthless, you stupid girl, loser, can't you please die madison, you're wasting oxygen, i wish you'll die right now, die, you must die.... because of the voices she got so irritate and frustrated from hearing the voices that she statred to bang her head into the wall again and again until her head started to bleed'
Oh Dang, i'm bleeding, i have to clean the blood off before anyone saw it...
'When she was cleaning the blood her friend grace called her to invite over to her house.. so after cleaning the blood she put a bandage on her head after that she got ready and then went to grace house...when she arrived at grace house she saw that grace older sister was not happy to see her like she used to be rather then she was angry, madison ignored that and went to grace room with her, when they were talking about somethings, grace older sister came up to madison in anger and said'
Stupid worthless worm, shameless girl, get out from here i don't want my sister to be like you, die and go to hell, it'll be amazing when you'll die..i wish you'll die right now
' While hearing that madison started to have a terrible panic attack, because of high anxiety he legs wasn't moving, her hands were shaking so much, she couldn't breathe properly, her heart beat got fast like she just ran a marathon, no words were coming out from her mouth so she just silently left her house and went to her home...when she got home she went to the kitchen grabbed a sharp knife and started to stab herself again and again every time more deeply then the previous one and while stabbing she said to herself that...'
Yeah I'm a fucking loser a worthless worm, she's right i fucking deserve to die, I hate myself, why am i like this? just why?
after stabbing herself for more then 26 times she stopped and after stopping she cried like a innocent baby and while crying she putted out her blade and cutted herself on her leg deeply so many times, in 5 minutes she losted alot of blood that she fainted from weakness...'
After 2 to 3 hours she woke up from being faint cause of the door bell, when she looked throw the window that who's at her home, it was her mom so she first ran to the bathroom cleaned herself and then ran to the kitchen and cleaned the blood from there as fast as she could and then went to open the door for her mom, when her mom saw her she said...'
Oh my god honey, what happened to you? are you okay?
No mom i'm not okay....
What happend honey tell me
I---I....
I?
Ummm... I'm vomiting since morning..
Honey... why you didn't told me?
I didn't wanted to ruin your business trip....
Honey i'm your mom next time you'll tell me okay honey?
Okay, okay mom
Come on we're going to the doctor
Ummm but....
I don't wanna hear anything we're going so we're going
O-Ok-Okay..
' When they went at the doctor, he injected her two drips cause of weakness, when they were on the way to home madison said to her mom that...'
Mom i don't wanna live anymore i'm tired, i wish i would die right now
Ummmm
'Her mom ignored it as she's talking about a toy so madison then said that'
Mom I'm seriously saying it.
Ummm
'After that she didn't said anything to her cause she wasn't taking her seriously so madison was thinking that she won't believe me until she'll find me dead'
'Next Day at 7:30am her mom went to her room to wake her up for school cause she was getting late'
Wake up honey, you're geting late for school
Mom.. i don't wanna go to school today..
Why honey?
I just don't want to today please leave me alone
Oh.. okay... i'll come back late home today.
'Then she went out, after few minutes she started to have a panic attack, she started to sweat really bad, her heart beat got so fast, her cheecks went red, her hands ,legs and arms started shaking so badly and then after few minutes she started to cry cause of too much anxiety, she really want someone to be with her to comfort her but at the same time she can't ask for help so she just silently cried while hugging her teddy bear, more she cried the more broken and lonely she fealt so after crying for more then 5 hours she finally texted someone and said (comfort me even fake comfort me but just please comfort me i'm breaking apart into that small pecies which are impossible to fix up) but that person didn't repiled even after seeing the message which maded her more cry that finally she asked for help but noone helped her she felted more broken and lonely, because of high anxiety her hallucinations got worse, when she counted that how many figures are they, it was 157 figures, three of them were coming to madison to hurt her so when they got more closer to her she fainted from fear.'
'After more then 7 hours at 2:36pm she woke up from being faint, she went downstairs to make herself lunch, after eating her lunch when she looked herself in the mirror she got so shocked to see herself, he colour is pale yellow and her eyes are that much swellen that she can barley open her eyes, she was just looking at herself that then the door bell ringed, when she went to open the door it was her mom and a man who she doesn't know but when she looked at the man she got a terrible flashback of him beating her and trying to kill her so she ran into her room while her mom was saying her to stop and listen but because of being scared she didn't stopped and locked her bed-room door..'