Three missed calls.
All since I got home last night.
I stare at my cracked cell phone screen from the discomfort of my tiny, lumpy bed.
It used to be fine until I spent a few weeks sleeping on the comfortable, heavenly bed in Jungkook's room.
My apartment used to feel warm enough, too, until I found myself missing the familiar sensation of his arm around my waist, his body snuggled up against mine.
I squint through the morning gloom across the single bedroom at the twins' crib.
They're still sleeping soundly, unaware that everything has changed.
Unaware of my pain.
But that's good.
This is the only way I can protect them from feeling the same kind of pain.
The phone buzzes again in my hand.
Him.
Again.
I tap Ignore, send it straight to voicemail, then hold down the power button until the phone shuts off.
I can't deal with this right now.
Eventually, I'll need to.
I'll have to decide if I can face him again.
Take the job—only the job, not the life I once dared to think might come with it.
Or if it's too much, if I can't handle seeing him… then I need to start applying elsewhere.
Polish up that résumé.
Get back into the hunt.
The hunt that was going abysmally before he agreed to take me on.
Haru fusses quietly, and I slip out of bed.
Pad across the room to scoop him up.
I pick up Areum too, then head back to my bed.
I curl up around them, feeling their warm, comforting weight in my arms.
Gazing into their bright baby doe eyes.
They're changing every day, my little darlings, becoming more and more aware of the world around them.
I want nothing more than to shelter them from it forever.
To keep them from ever feeling the hurt I do right now.
I curl around them and close my eyes.
I'll feed them in a minute. I just want to hold them right now, cuddle them.
Haru curls his fingers in my hair, Areum hangs on to my fingers for dear life, and we cling like that to each other, three lost peas alone in this crappy pod of an apartment.
I don't remember falling asleep.
I don't realize I have until the knocking startles me awake. The door. I groan and untangle myself from the kids. Haru cries as soon as I let him go, which sets off Areum.
I try to hush them, even as I hop around the room pulling on a pair of pants over the panties I slept in.
The knocking continues, louder and louder.
Crap.
Is it my landlord?
I'm not behind on rent again.
Am I?
Finally, I yank a shirt over my head and pad across the dingy floor to the door.
I fling it open, not bothering to peer out through the peephole first.
Mistake.
Jungkook stands in my doorway.
Framed against the dim apartment hallway, a dingy light illuminating his crisply pressed white work shirt and suit pants, he looks as out of place as a fairy tale prince in a bad cop show.
Meanwhile, I look like a disaster, having just rolled out of bed, my hair sticking up on end, eyes red from crying myself to sleep, cheeks puffy from the same.
I move to close the door on him, instinctively, but he blocks it with his foot.
"Please, Taehyung. Let me come in."
Just that simple phrase, just my name on his lips, makes my insides melt.
I've never been able to resist him.
Not even now.
Not even knowing what he did.
So I step back and open the door wider.
Let him into my apartment.
To his credit, he doesn't make a face when I lead him into the bedroom. He takes a seat on the single chair across from the bed, a rocking chair where I cradle Areum to sleep on fussy nights.
I perch on the bed, one hand resting protectively on each of my babies.
"What do you want?" I say, and my voice comes out harsher than I meant it to, choked with sleep deprivation and grief.
"I want you to come to work," he says simply.
I laugh.
Sharp and bitter.
"You don't need me. You never did."
He doesn't respond.
Just watches me, intense and quiet.
"You saw an opportunity in me," I guess. "Someone you could take advantage of. You knew I was in a bad position, you knew I had nobody else, so if you helped me, I'd be dependent on you. You could hide me and shame me into silence when your real partner came calling if she ever found out."
Now, he reacts.
His eyebrows hit his forehead.
"What are you talking about?"
I look at my lap.
I can't meet his eyes for this.
Can't watch the lies form in his eyes.
"I found the folder," I say as I rub Haru's stomach gently.
Slow, concentric circles.
Focus on him, on my baby.
Not on this man who gutted me.
"The one from A New Chance. For you and…" I shake my head.
I can't say her name.
Can't make this real.
Before I even finish, Jungkook is beside me on the bed, his hand on my shoulder.
"Taehyung."
He's laughing. Laughing.
How could he, at a time like this?
But he cups my face in his hand and turns me to face him, and I see genuine warmth and amusement in his eyes.
"You're wrong, Taehyung. It's not what you think."
I pull away from him, tears springing to my eyes again.
I can't watch him laugh at me.
Mock me for trusting him.
"If I'm wrong, then explain it to me. Tell me why you lied, why you pretended to care about me, about the twins. Why did you lie and pretend you wanted more babies—you already have children, don't you? You have a family with an omega I've never even heard of."
"Yes you have," he whispers.
My eyes widen.
Is he admitting it?
Unable to help myself, I look back at him.
There's a quiet, sincere seriousness in his gaze, one I can't turn away from.
"You've met the omega. You know who the father of my children is."
I didn't catch what he said quick enough before snapping at him, "I never met the woman in that photo," But he's already shaking his head, half laughing, yet with a spark in his eye.
Something bright that catches the light as he shakes his head no.
"It's you, Taehyung."
I stare at him blankly.
I don't understand.
He stands, crosses the space between us then grabs my shoulders, his expression turning darker.
Wild.
"You are the omega. The father of my children. The twins… They're mine."
My lips part, slowly.
Moving without permission from my brain.
But… "That's impossible," I whisper.
Jungkook closes his eyes, grimacing, his hands held onto my shoulders, tighten to the point where his grip is almost painful.
But I welcome it.
That little spike of pain is the only thing tethering me to reality right now.
The rest of the world is fuzzy with confusion.
"My ex… Chae Young, the woman in that photo. She was not a good woman. She was an alcoholic, a user, an abuser. I saw that in her, but I was so desperate for a family, I thought we could make it work anyway. I thought she would change if we had kids together. So we went to the clinic. That's the file you found. It's from years ago when we were first tested. They told me it was unlikely I'd be able to conceive, but we tried some experimental procedures. I gave them samples, and they finally got some viable samples from me, sperm that would work…"
He opens his eyes to meet mine again, real sorrow in them.
"Before they finished the tests, I caught her cheating on me. With my best friend."
"Jungkook…" I breathe, reaching to touch his cheek gently. "I'm so sorry…"
"It's okay." He wraps his hand around my wrist. "It was meant to happen, don't you see? I'm glad she did, glad I never gave that one precious sample to her. There was a mistake… The clinic was supposed to save the sample for me, but they told me they lost it."
"I was distraught. They said they probably couldn't get any more viable samples from me, that I'd likely never conceive. My one chance at children and they ruined it for me. But then, a couple of months ago, the clinic contacted me. There'd been a mistake. A mix-up. They didn't lose my sample—they used it."
My eyes widen slowly.
Both of us glance at the twins at the same time.
I look at Haru's handsome face, at his dark hair, just coming in, peach fuzz on his head, his eyes, which had started light browns, but we're slowly darkening to a chocolate colour.
A colour that looks very similar to his father's…
"I used it," I whisper, awed.
"I made them tell me," he says, and I look back at him, tears stinging my eyes for a completely different reason now. "I know the paperwork was sealed, your donation was supposed to be anonymous. But I threatened to sue them, and the clinic told me, finally, that you'd received the sample. You were the mother. They sent me your information, and when I looked you up and saw that job posting online…"
He trails off, shaking his head. "At first I only wanted to meet my children. I wanted to make sure they were all right. I didn't intend to tell you anything. I assumed you had a husband, a boyfriend, someone in the picture who was meant to be the father. Surely the clinic had just mixed up my sample with theirs. And you are so beautiful, so amazing, you couldn't be single. But then I met you…"
His hands tighten around my shoulders.
I reach up to wrap my arms around his.
I am crying now, unable to help myself.
Tears of emotion streaking my face.
The happiness, the truth of all of this, feels almost too great to bear.
Can this be true?
Can he be the father of my children, the man I never thought I needed?
The man I didn't believe existed?
"I want you, I need you," he whispers, his voice low with feeling now. "I want, no, I need this family. Once I realized you were single, available… I was consumed with feelings, Taehyung. I love you."
I blink hard, a solid lump tightening in my throat.
"But I was scared to tell you, afraid that you would hate me. For hiring you for false reasons, for keeping this from you. I thought you wouldn't understand."
"Jungkook. Stop." I tilt my head forward to rest my forehead against his, our eyes still locked. "Of course I understand."
"I want everything, Taehyung. You, the twins, a life together." He closes his eyes again, a crease of pain crossing his forehead. "I can't have more children. I'm infertile now. If you want someone who can, if you want a man who can give you more, I understand. But I won't ever give up on wanting you, and my children. You must accept that."
I pull him into a kiss before he can say anything else so stupid or insane. The kiss sears through me, the kind of kiss I feel to my toes, to the tips of my fingers. When we break apart again, we're both breathing faster, our eyes glazed with desire.
"I want you, Jungkook. I want our life together. I want to raise our family, I want to watch our kids grow together. The twins are all I ever wanted from life. I didn't realize I could have more. I didn't realize I would ever meet a man like you." I kiss him again, and this time he kisses me back hard, desperate. "It all makes sense now," I whisper when we break apart. "The way you are with the twins, the way you care about me…"
"You are more than I ever expected, Taehyung. More than I could have ever dreamed of. I'll never get tired of being with you, touching you…"
My eyes sparkle as they catch his. "Promises, promises," I whisper, and he grins, too, leaning in to deepen our kiss.
Areum gurgles at us, we break apart, laughing. Life with kids.
"I love you too, Jungkook."
He feeds Areum and I feed Haru, both of us catching one another's eyes over the tops of the twins' heads as we do, a knowing desire sparking in our faces.
Together, we change the twins, then lay them down to nap.
Only then does he take my face in his hands, tilt my chin up until we're nose-to-nose.
He kisses me deeply, and we fall right back into place. Together, at last.
He pushes me down on top of the bed, pulls off my pants, my shirt, my panties. I yank his clothes off too, desperate to feel his bare skin against mine.
When we're both finally naked though, he tortures me by waiting, holding himself on both arms above me and gazing along my length, slowly taking me in, devouring every inch of me with that hot gaze of his.
I stare at him too, marvelling at this man.
The father of my children.
The man of my dreams.
I run my hands over his chest, tracing his muscles.
I finger his pecs, his abs, follow the sexy V down his stomach to his groin. Run my fingers across his happy trail, lower, lower…
"God you are so sexy," I tell him. But before I can grab his hard cock, he wraps a hand around my wrist. Lifts my arm in one sudden motion and pins it over my head.
"I could say the same of you, you dirty little Papa."
Grinning, defiant, I reach for his cock with my other hand instead. "What are you going to do about it?"
Swiftly, he pins that hand too.
He's strong enough to hold both my wrists in one hand above my head, making me helpless beneath him.
I squirm in anticipation as he leans in to run his tongue up the side of my neck.
"I'm going to take what I want from you," he whispers, and I shiver, already feeling myself growing wet. "I'm going to fvck you so hard I'll put another baby inside you."
"Promises, promises," I repeat, and his eyes light up, on fire with want.
He uses his knee to force my legs apart, positioning himself between my thighs. He keeps my hands pinned and leans down to lick my nipples, his tongue scouring, searing hot that harden as his tongue circles them in slow, teasing motions.
When my nipples are hard as rocks, he lets his tongue graze them lightly, not quite biting, but enough of a sharp sensation to make me gasp.
"You like that, don't you, you bad boy."
I squirm again, arching my hips to try to press his cock against mine. "Fvck yes I do."
He positions his hips between mine. Trails his cock across my centre, over my cock, running the head of his dick between my leaking opening. Not entering me. Not yet. "What do you want me to do to you, Taehyung?" he purrs.
"Fvck me," I gasp. "Fvck me hard."
That seems to be all the motivation he needs. Before I can prepare myself, he pushes his cock inside me. Thrusts deep into my hungry hole, burying himself to the hilt. His balls slap my ass, and I groan, my head falling back as I writhe on his thick cock.
"God you feel too fvcking good," he growls through gritted teeth. In response, I thrust my hips up against his, grinding my cock against his hip bone.
He grins down at me, a dangerous smile before he leans in to claim my mouth in his, his tongue exploring my mouth as he pulls back and thrusts into me once more.
He lets go of my wrists and I wrap my arms around his neck, he pulls my hips up off the bed.
He tosses my legs over his shoulders, still keeping his cock inside me, so I'm arched against him, my whole body on display.
He fvcks me like that, his cock pressing against my front wall with every thrust, right along my sensitive bundle of nerves. It doesn't take me long to feel the heat build.
I dig my nails into his back as he thrusts at me with hard, relentless motions. I came with a shout, a little bit of my cum squirting between us as he kept fvcking me, his thick cock deep in my hole.
He hits my spot at this angle, with the oversensitive nerves, it hurts, but the spike of pain feels so good that I don't want him to stop.
The head of his cock slides back and forth and my toes curl, my legs clenching around his waist as I come again, strips of white between our bodies, crying out his name on my lips.
He's getting close too, I can tell from the frantic, strong thrusts he's giving me. He roars my name, and I dig my hands into his hair, forcing him to look at me, to meet my gaze as his orgasm hits.
He growls, loud, deep and guttural, when he comes inside me, his thick luscious cum coating the walls of my hole.
He kept fvcking, thrusting into me like a piston as the cum kept spurting.
Finally, he started to slow, and I pulled him down against me.
His sweat-dusted body feels slick against mine, hard in all the places where I'm soft, and I wrap my arms around his neck, our faces pressed cheek-to-cheek, just savouring the feel of him.
The smell of sex and sweat and both of us mingles in the air.
I love this, feeling him still inside me, filling me, our bodies exhausted from pleasure.
When he finally pulls out, we both groan faintly in disappointment. Though I do savour the hot rush of his cum, spilling down my thigh, trickling along the crack of my ass.
He slides one finger between my legs to feel it too, and pulls his hand up, sticky with our combined juices. He spreads it across my chest, painting me in our sex.
I grab his wrist and lean up to bite his lower lip gently. In response, he pins me against the bed, running his body against mine.
Already, I feel him start to grow a little stiffer again, between us.
I arch my hips up to grind against him and grin, daring. "Is that all you've got, Daddy?"
His eyes light up at that, fiery hot. "Oh, just you wait, you dirty little Papa..."