Chapter 6: Social Worker

Nothing to be shamed of. I am like your mother. Your mother is like a sister to me. This is how all began with me. I was 11 years old then. My parents never cared where I spent my whole day. They just wanted a peaceful happiness from me.

She was a beautiful woman with an angel voice which rings in my ears still. She was living and breathing all alone. No one live with her, didn't know why. Seemed no one care. I was on the other hand lonely boy, no play mate to hangout with because nobody likes my type of boy. Naturally, I am very interesting and exciting man from inside that never outs, especially when I see young girl who are trying to seduce me.

They try to seduce me with their Marilyn Monroe voice, beautiful eyes which seems to me work of art, their figure, their dark sacred desire, different poses of nakedness and so on.....n on. But somehow I survived every time, feeling sorry at the end for not sharing myself with them. Their generosity, I kept myself inside of me.

I only belongs to her. My only lady in life. She taught me how to feel like a man at the age of 11 years when I didn't learn to know enough that how to do it in the washroom, how to fully focus on one hole and nevertheless not to feel shame about it.

She is my only lady. My dream woman, the woman that I deeply in love with, my heart only speaks about her, whisper around my ears to do things that I could never think of doing it with sanity. Whenever weekend comes across the corner of the week. She hold me into my bed, sit on my stomach, grab my wrists, I try my best to wrestle with her but my body doesn't cooperate when it's her. She looks in my eyes then slowly down to my ears then I wake up to remember it's weekend and she is not with me anymore.

She left me for her new subject, she is a photographer, one of a kind in my eyes. She saw the timeless reality that stills in me. In her eyes I am that source of all wonders that no one knew before. I lost myself in her words and she still wondering in my thoughts. I can't just replace her. She was my pleasure and pain that agonize me every now and then. Leave me empty inside.

She was my first photographer who introduced me with fashion industry at the age of 11. I was quite a bit more than 11 years old who looks like 16 years.

It was quiet a thriving experience for me at first. Football, food products, comics, clothing and then one day she asked me to come to her home studio where I first came to know that I am a man in love.

The sky was heavy with dark clouds, soft cold air going through everywhere. I took my bath, wore my casual wear blue jeans and white shirt with sneakers. Windy weather changed my hairstyle along the way. I pressed the bell and there she was with her shorts and t-shirt. Her hair was flying around on air. She hurriedly walked me to her waiting room and let me wait for her. Her house is nice, small arrangement but nice. Waiting room attached kitchen and bathroom, on right her bedroom and bathroom, left her playroom and studio with again another bathroom. I totally love the fact that every room had their own cleansing room.

After half an hour of waiting she came to collect me for her studio. She closed the door as I stepped in her studio then she came close to me, messed up my hair more and more till she get it right with her soft hands, as I was a tall guy, she had to stand on her toe for a while and lean over me. That was the first time she ever touched my hair, her over my chest, hand over my broad shoulder and neck. Smell of her perfume obeyed my eyes to see her lips that was looking so lustrous then. Every second of her breathing, I was feeling over my chest, her opening and closing lips when she couldn't fix my hair as she wanted to before I could aware of she slipped over me for few seconds because her toes were numb for standing on them unkindly, then slowly but lightly unbuttoning my shirt, one by one, touching my naked skin with her soft hands. I couldn't count how many times or hours she took but I did as she wanted me to. It was completely breathtaking experience for me. My heart was pounding the whole time like it's going to jump out from the ribcages of mine. I couldn't tell if I was blushing or not but I was feeling a little bit of warmth there and kept my lips tightly to myself so I couldn't not lose it's urges. I didn't want to show her that my lips where shaking out of ignorant experiences of her.

The rain started to pouring on by then we finished our whole day of hardwork. She left me to uptight myself as she ventured over me up until then. Unbuttoned jeans, unbuttoned shirt, taken off sneakers, everything I had to taken care of myself. I was in another world then evolving my own on my new feelings for her. Over and over her lustrous deep thirsty lips coming on my windshield of mind.

That was the last time I saw her. I need to find her out where is she now. I feel aches in my heart only by thinking of her. I called my secretary to give her address and phone number. As it seems she only left with her agency her home address, no cell number. My secretary messaged me her address as I said to her.

She lives in her hometown now, I need to take my car and give her a try to understand what I have inside me, what is it? Love, lust, compassion, sympathy or male hormone that wanting her in my life. It's a beautiful town. I prefer to live here more than the city. All the people working now, children playing on the park, giggling, running enjoying. Dogs barking to catch a ball. It's nice. Weekend enticement, I guess. I have reached to my desired place. Quiet relaxing arrangements she has done for her living as I can see.

Beautiful dream home of her, lovely, I hope she appreciates my sudden surprise of visiting her. It's been a long time. Now I am a mature man, want to date her, to get married and have few kids. I hope she likes it. I have bought some gifts for her, I hope she like them as well. I am standing in her front terrace, ringing her front door calling bell for a minute but where is she? I am getting impatient here now.

I need to look around the house. There is a backyard and a back door as well. It's open, that's very kind of her. Hello!! Anyone!! Hello!! Where is she? Should I look upstairs? I hope she doesn't mind. Oh! There are couple of bedrooms with corridors. That's why it's hard to hear the door bell I guess and there is also a sound of music, coming from one of the bedrooms. She probably working there. As I opened the door, I didn't expect at all what I just saw. Few men on their birthday suit, hardly anything on them with couple of ladies, dressing like a mother, feeding them and she my future wife taking photos of them. It's a hall room that she is using as a studio. I have just slowly closed the door and went back to the road. I can't believe what I have just encountered to dealt with. It's my luck I suppose, she didn't notice me in all those noises. My heart just pounding little hard and slow. Didn't imagined it at all. I was prepared to get rejection from her but not this at all. I need to eat something before I leave the town. There it is a little cafe in the corner. It's looking nice after the rain. Four cross roads and on side this small cafe. Little gloomy weather, soft cold breezy air brushing over my hair, soft yellow lights coming out from those big glass windows of the cafe, looking good, comforting for my soul especially after what I have just surprised with.

It's a cozy place. Everyone seems know each other. I ordered a coffee latte, chicken pops and cream puffs. My heart needs them right now and it's little chilly weather as well.

They kept magazines for the waiting customers that's nice. Local magazines, published locally as well. There is photographical section, photographed by her, okay, she is a locally famous photographer. That's nice in a way. Little explicit photographs as I have seen earlier. My food arrived at times while I was waiting with their magazines. Sir! Sir! Who? Ah, waiter calling me. Yes? The waiter seems excited about something. Sir, are you a model? Amm, I don't know, you tell me, I am new at this town just passing by, anything else you like to tell me about? The waiter is a teenage boy, little darker than a white male guy, bright dark eyes, sparkling with excitement. Then he showed me his pictures from the magazines that he is a local part timer model, like to be a professional. I let him sit with me. Asking him about her, at first he was feeling shy about it then he confessed that she is his first crush and because of her mostly he is interested on modelling. I am speechless by the vary thoughts of it as if I am seeing myself infront of me. I was once like him and thought like him as well. I pulled myself together and ask him why is she so much important to you? After that, what he says surprise me a little, she is a good hearted social worker who works for the society by giving chance to local kids and adults as a freelancer model. He adores her because of it. Then I understand what a great mistake I was going to do with the local people by making her my wife. I was going to take her freedom of doing great work for them as a normal man like me it can not be accepted but as a professional and being a part of the potential social worker's artistic work everything is acceptable though I personally can't allow myself to do every work of her but others are going to like it.

Later, I paid my bills and gave him my card to meet me in my office alone and leave the town slowly, keeping her in my heart as a memory.