Operation: entertainment district
"ALL RIGHT...I AM A GOD! YOU GUYS ARE TRASH! FIRST GET THAT INTO YOUR HEADS! DRILL IT IN THERE! IF I SAY BE A DOG, YOU ACT LIKE A DOG! IF I SAY BE A MONKEY, ACT LIKE A MONKEY!! FIRST AND FOREMOST, YOU MUST PLEASE ME! BOW AND SCRAPE AND AVERT YOUR EYES! YOU TOADIES ARE MINE, BODY AND SOUL! I'LL SAY IT AGAIN, I AM GOD!!"
"What a crappy god you are" kage mumbled
"WHAT DID YOU SAY YOU PIRATE?"
"Netsu...why did you rope me into this? I already get beat up enough by shinazugawa-san, i don't want to get beat up anymore…" hoshi muttered
"We're gonna be fine! I'll make sure he won't lay a finger on you guys" netsu said
"What exactly are you the god of?" tanjiro asked
We're doomed
"Good question. You've got promise."
It's a dumb question.
He's hopeless.
"I am the god of glam and flash...the god of festivals!"
What an idiot.
Without a doubt, he's the god of idiots
"I'm the god of the mountain. Greetings god of festivals!" inosuke said
The group stared at inosuke.
"What are you talking about? You're weird" uzui said
You think that's weird?!
He's acting just like you!!
How can he be so dismissive if they're two of a kind?!
"Along the way to the hanamachi, there is a wisteria house. We'll make our preparations there"
"P-preparations?" shizen asked
"Follow me, you lot"
FWFF
Uzui was gone
"HEY! HE'S GONE!" zenitsu yelled
Then they looked at the winding road
"AHH! HE'S FAST! HE LOOKS SO FAR AWAY, HE LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE SESAME SEED" taiyo yelled
"If i go now, i can catch up to him…" kage said
"BEHOLD THE POWER OF THE GOD OF FESTIVALS!" inosuke yelled
Kage and inosuke ran after uzui
The rest ran behind them
"He's not the god of festivals, he's just the sound pillar, uzui!" tanjiro said
"SHUT UP, WE NEED TO CATCH UP WITH THE DUDE" shizen yelled
Sometimes I wonder why I met them…
Idiots-
…..
Meanwhile a mile ahead…
Kage ran besides uzui
"I haven't seen someone this fast in ages"
"Expect nothing less from the god of sparkle!"
"What?? You're so weird.."
"No one can compete with me….WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
Uzui ran faster.
"Ugh..so naive.."
…
At a house with a wisteria flower in its crest
Members of the demon slayer corps receive assistance at no charge.
"Once in the entertainment district, i'll gather information on demon, while you keep your eyes open for women that i can marry" uzui said
"Pardon-" hoshi started
"THAT'S ABSURD" zenitsu screeched
"HUH?" uzui yelled
"STOP MESSING AROUND! THE DEMON SLAYER CORPS ISN'T A MATCHMAKING SERVICE!"
"HUH?! LISTEN, YOU'RE WRONG-" uzui yelled
"NO, YOU LISTEN TO ME! I GET THAT A WEIRDO LIKE YOU MUST HAVE A LOT OF TROUBLE WITH THE LADIES...BUT...DON'T USE MEMBERS OF THE CORPS TO FIND YOURSELF A WIFE"
"YOU IDIOT! MY WIVES SNUCK INTO THIS ENTERTAINMENT DISTRICT AND HAVE BEEN GATHERING INFORMATION ABOUT THE DEMON HERE! I'M GOING BECAUSE THEIR COMMUNICATIONS SUDDENLY STOPPED!"
"Is that a weird fantasy you tell yourself?"
"YOU SNOT NOSED BRAT"
He threw envelopes at zenitsu
"HERE! THESE ARE THE LETTERS THEY SENT BY CROW!"
"That's a lot...she must write very quickly…" kuki said
"Actually...it's they" netsu said
"Dolt! I have three wives!" uzui said
"THREE?! HOW CAN YOU HAVE THREE WIVES?! GIMME A BREAK!!" zenitsu screeched
Then uzui punched Zenitsu in the stomach.
"You got a problem with that?"
"Um...in these letters they keep reminding you not to stand out when you arrive. What are we gonna do?" netsu asked
"Use disguises of course. It's boring and plain, but...i have to get you nine in there for your mission"
"Wait, back up, I have to go in a disguise too?! I thought I would just be watching over them too!" netsu said
"Nah"
"Damn" she mumbled
"I thought an entertainment district would be the perfect place for demons to hide… but when I snuck in as a customer, I couldn't find any leads. But my three wives are outstanding kunoichii-- female ninjas...so I sent them in, but not as customers. We've narrowed it down to three establishments...so you'll go there and look for my wives. Suma at house Tokito...Makio at house ogimoto...and hinatsuru at house kyogoku."
"What if your wives are already dead?" taiyo asked
He got punched in the stomach.
Kuki didn't do anything about it.
Then the door opened
"We brought all the things you'll need." a man said
"Thanks…" uzui said, very angry.
…
Yoshiwara
A town of the night awash in vanity, desire, love and hate.
The hanamachi entertainment district is, as its name suggests, a specialized section of town.
Most of the courtesans here were sold into service due to poverty and debt.
So they bear many hardships.
They now have food, clothing, and shelter.
And if they succeed as a courtesan, a wealthy man may yet buy their freedom.
An orian, the highest rank among courtesans, is a special woman.
One who has everything.
Beauty
Education
And artistry.
An orian ranks high in status.
So it can be difficult to meet one.
Men compete with one another in order to gain the attention of an orian.
"Woah...those are some ugly girls! well...except for those three" a man said as he pointed to shizen, hoshi, and netsu
"I'm sorry, but we just got new help, so we can't…"
"I mean...three more wouldn't hurt...!" a woman said
"Then all I ask is that you care for three of them. Thank you ma'am" uzui said
He thought that looking normal was not being as sparkly as he normally was.
Oh how wrong he was-
"In that case, we'll take the middle one and the one with white hair and brown hair and white haori."
Tanjiro, taiyo and kuki stepped up.
"We'll work as hard as we can!" the three said in a weird falsetto.
Thus the three got jobs.
"You all are completely hopeless! I'll have to sell you dirt cheap!"
"Oi, it's not our fault people see the amazing value in us" netsu said, sarcastically.
"Take this seriously!" uzui yelled
"I'm sorry, i thought i would be the one helping you fight demons, NOT THE ONE DRESSING UP LIKE A WHO-"
"Hey! What's happening over there!?" Inosuke yelled.
The group looked at a crowd forming.
"Oh...it's an oiran dochu. A courtesan procession. That's koinatsu, an orian from house tokito. A high-ranking courtesan is going to greet a suitor. Ooo! How much did that cost? Very flashy!" uzui said.
"WHAT?! THAT'S YOUR WIFE?!" zenitsu screeched
"BACK OFF" uzui yelled
"THAT GODDESS IS YOUR WIFE? NO WAY! ARE ALL THREE OF THEM THAT BEAUTIFUL?!"
"THAT'S NOT MY WIFE! I WROTE DOWN THEIR NAMES FOR YOU" uzui punched zenitsu again.
"You all move too slow" hoshi said
"in the mountains, you'd get killed right away if you're too slow" inosuke said
Behind kage, hoshi, and inosuke, a woman stared at the three.
"Pardon me, kind sir, but...if you're looking to place these children, I'll take them in. I'm the madam at house ogimoto, and I have an eye for talent." the woman said
"House ogimoto! I'd be grateful for that!" uzui said
The woman held kage, inosuke and hoshi's hands, and took them to her house.
"Take care inoko, kaori, and hoshi!"
And so, Netsu, Shizen, And Zenitsu were left.
…
"HEY! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?! WITH THAT SCAR NO CUSTOMERS WOULD WANT YOU! GIVE ME A BREAK! THAT MAN WAS SO GOOD LOOKING, HOW COULD HE SWINDLE ME? I WON'T FORGIVE THIS! GRRRRRR!"
The woman was pulling Tanjiro's hair, while yelling at him for the scar.
Meanwhile, kuki and taiyo tried to save him