Naruto Shippuden - part 24

Tsunade's mind worked feverishly to figure out what the hell was going on as she sped towards Naruto and Xanna's chakra signatures, but was coming up with nothing.

She could fully understand Naruto's need to leave the village, that she had actually been half expecting. She and Jiraiya had both been perfectly willing to make a show driving him off in order for the more paranoid elements of the village to settle down, while letting Naruto and Xanna leave without really making a problem out of it. All the Jounin she had with her at the moment were ones that she knew could be trusted to go along with it.

What she hadn't seen coming was for the two of them to go on a rampage over the village. Worst of all was the fact that she couldn't make heads or tails of her fellow blond's actions. He was killing some people while sparing others without any apparent rhyme or reason aside from whatever whim struck him at the time.

The group she was leading, which consisted mostly of the sensei's of Naruto's graduating class, along with some others, were wondering much the same thing.

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When they finally reached the most troublesome of blond's, he was still standing with his arms crossed in the exact same spot as before. This time however, he was standing in the middle of a group of shinobi(both regular and ANBU) who were trying and failing to attack him. Anyone that attempted to get close to him would end up getting smacked with either a chain or a fox tail. Ninjutsu were similarly useless as they either ended up getting absorbed into the glove or blocked by a Red Yang Barrier that formed between two chains.

"Too weak, you are all far too weak. You need to train for ten thousand years before you can think of touching me." Naruto scoffed as he easily defended himself, not even needing to move. It was a rather unfair comparison, since he had Xanna to help him control the chains and tails, as well as paying attention to their surroundings, but that was not the point.

"Naruto! What the hell are you doing?!" Tsunade yelled out when she saw him toying with the shinobi attacking him. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Xanna was back to being sealed inside him.

"Hey there Tits, have you come to join the party?" Naruto asked with a grin, his eyes glowing with amusement.

Tsunade growled and charged into the attack, intent on punching that grin right off his face. To her surprise, Naruto let her pass through the chains, but caught her fist in his palm, making her halt in her tracks. With a shove, he forced her to backpedal.

While Tsunade took a moment to catch her balance again, Asuma and Gai went to attack, but found themselves easily smacked away by chains.

Slashing his hand through the air, Naruto cut through the snakes that had been intending to wrap around him, shocking Anko, who had thought that she was supposed to be invisible.

"How did you know I was there?" She asked.

"Kurenai already used her Yin Release Genjutsu on us not very long ago, so Xanna is fluctuating her own Yin aspect to block it." Naruto explained with a snicker.

Kurenai's eye twitched with irritation at hearing that the blond had once again found a way to be immune to her Genjutsu. That had been annoying when he'd first discovered it and it was even more annoying now.

"That's not going to work either Kakashi." He commented, seeing his old sensei activating the Mangenkyo Sharingan. "I have a space-time stabilization seal placed on me, preventing any warping of space-time from being used on me."

"Why are you doing this Naruto?" The masked Jounin asked.

"Indeed, this is most unyouthful." Gai added.

The battle had lulled for a moment as everyone tried to figure out a way to reach the blond and came up with nothing. They couldn't use any particularly destructive Ninjutsu without harming the many unconscious shinobi on the ground around Naruto and Taijutsu was proving useless.

"I was actually waiting for you guys to show up, though there's less of you than I expected to be honest." He said airily and threw a paper airplane at Tsunade.

Naruto chortled as everyone ducked for cover in the belief that it was a seal of some kind. "It's not a seal. Damn you guys are paranoid."

Still shaking his head in laughter, he gave them a wave and vanished in a Hiraishin teleportation, having disabled the space-time stabilizer while he was talking to Kakashi.

While those who recognised it were staring in stunned shock, Anko picked up the paper airplane and unfolded it. As soon as she read it, a sweatdrop formed on her head and she passed it to Tsunade.

As soon as the busty Hokage read the note, her face took on an extremely pissed off look and she stomped off in the direction that she could sense Naruto was now, leaving everyone staring in confusion.

Picking up the now crumpled note, Jiraiya started reading out loud.

"Dear mixed group of people who I used to work/train/fight/gamble/have sex with, you are cordially invited to the wedding of Uzumaki Naruto, the baddest ass you will ever meet and Xanna, the Kyuubi no Kitsune, Queen of Demons, Crimson Calamity, etc., etc. Thank you for joining the pre-wedding festivities and rest assured that we will not pay for any damages or injuries incurred as a result of said festivities. If you choose to attend, then please follow the chakra signature to the designated location."

Everyone was sweatdropping heavily by the end of the short message.

"All this...just to make one last hurrah? And what the hell is this about marrying the Kyuubi?" Asuma asked in disbelief.

"I get the feeling it's not going to be the last hurrah by a long shot." Jiraiya muttered not very quietly, completely ignoring the second question.

He had to give his godson credit though. He had balls, going after the Kyuubi and somehow succeeding in getting the demoness to marry him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Tsunade stopped near Sakura, Hinata and Tenten, who were for some reason already there and hiding in a small outcropping of trees. The location itself was nothing particularly out of the ordinary. Just another training ground to the east of the village.

"What are you three doing here?" Tsunade asked suspiciously. Naruto's graduating class had been deliberately excluded from the manhunt for the blond, these three girls in particular due to having close ties to him...And they wanted their subterfuge to be limited to as few people as possible.

"Naruto sent clones to pick us up and bring us here for some reason." Sakura explained, keeping her eyes on the figure of Naruto that was standing in the clearing some distance away.

"What is he doing?" Hinata wondered quietly, seeing that her big brother was just standing there and looking focused.

The question turned out to not need any answer, as a crimson chakra mist began to seep out of Naruto's body and soon formed the nine tailed figure of Xanna. By now the others had caught up and were staring at the pair of them, completely unsure about their next course of action.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Oi Xanna, the sun is rising." Naruto commented idly as he put his hand around her waist. Both of them ignored the crowd that was observing in wary confusion.

"I can see that Naruto. I did tell you that your overdramatic idea about getting married just as the sun rose was going to fail didn't I?" Xanna said with a slight scoff.

"That you did." He agreed in good humor. "Good thing it's not really important then isn't it?"

The demoness simply hummed her agreement. "Well, I went along with it because I figured you deserved a say in the matter after eleven years of stubborn pursuit, but now it's time for you to become mine forever."

"I was always yours and you know it." He responded with a grin.

"Then by the power vested in me...by me, I now pronounce us husband and wife. There will be no objections." Xanna declared, aiming a short glare at the hidden shinobi.

"I just love how you've given yourself authority to marry us without even asking for an 'I do'." Naruto said dryly.

"Shut up and kiss the bride." She commanded.

Naruto had no problems obeying that order. "Yes ma'am."

A moment after the kiss began, Naruto felt her powerful chakra being forced into his coils, scorching them slightly until it settled into the Reaper Death Seal. He turned a questioning look on her, curious as to why she had done that.

"Keep that piece of me with you always, as a reminder of who you belong to and of who belongs to you."

"WHOO!"

Everyone turned blank gazes on Anko, who had her arms stretched upwards in a cheer.

"What?" She asked, confused. "It was a great wedding; short, to the point and full of girl power."

Meanwhile, Tsunade couldn't contain her rage anymore and flew at Naruto with a roar, fully intending to knock his block off.

The newlyweds managed to dodge without any particular issue, but Naruto was still kind of annoyed by the attack.

"OI! You just ruined the moment!" He protested and then took a look at the cratered ground. "Are you trying to kill me or something?"

"YEAH!" Tsunade responded with a fierce glare and gritted teeth. "DIE!"

This time, her punch did not miss and caused Naruto's head to snap sideways from the force of her blow.

"Now you're starting to PISS ME OFF!" He yelled and punched back, sending her skidding back as she blocked it by crossing her arms.

"GOOD! MAYBE NOW YOU'LL KNOW HOW I FEEL." She roared back, throwing another punch that he didn't bother dodging, instead taking it right in the gut.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SO PISSED ABOUT TITS?! SOMEONE STOLE YOUR DENTURES THIS MORNING?" The yell was accompanied by another punch that Tsunade caught in her palm, but it still sent her skidding backwards.

"I'M PISSED BECAUSE YOU DID SO MUCH SHIT JUST FOR THE SAKE OF GOING OUT AND GETTING MARRIED WITH A BANG! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU'RE GOING TO BE A MISSING-NIN NOW?!"

"SO FUCKING WHAT?! WHAT IS ANYONE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?!"

"Umm, should we help her?" Asuma asked uncertainly, fingering his trench knives.

"YES! It is our most youthful duty to aid our Hokage!" Gai affirmed and prepared to charge into the fray.

Both Jounin suddenly felt themselves pinned by two pissed off glares, one brown and the other gold-orange.

"SHUT THE HELL UP! YOU'RE IN THE WAY!" Naruto and Tsunade yelled in perfect unison and stomped their feet to make the ground crack under Asuma and Gai's feet.

Nobody paid any mind to Xanna's amused chuckling at the scene.

The two blond's glared at each other furiously for a moment, both exuding a practically visible, golden battle aura and snorting like a pair of angry bulls.

"ORAAAH!"

As if by some unseen signal, they once again moved into the attack, smashing both of their fists together with enough force to cause a shockwave of air to ripple outwards.

Swiftly changing from a position of having their fists pushing against each other to a contest of strength with their fingers laced and foreheads mashed together.

The stalemate continued for a moment longer, both combatants baring their teeth in fury until Naruto suddenly grinned and lowered the amount of strength he was exerting, causing Tsunade to overbalance in her push forward. Swiftly taking advantage of the situation, Naruto bent her arms behind her back, grabbed them both with one hand, placed the now free one on the back of her head and pulled her in for a kiss.

Tsunade goggled in shocked outrage when he pushed his tongue into her mouth and refused to let her back up. When she finally managed to get one of her hands free she punched him away and wiped her mouth.

"YOU CRAZY BASTARD, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT?! YOU JUST GOT MARRIED! AND DID YOU HAVE TO USE SO MUCH TONGUE?!"

"SO?! MY WIFE USED MY BODY TO RAPE ANOTHER WOMAN JUST A FEW HOURS AGO!"

"GAH! YOU KNOW I HATE IT WHEN YOU MAKE THOSE STUPID JOKES!

"HOW ABOUT THIS ONE THEN! I'M GOING TO HUNT DOWN THAT LITTLE BITCH OROCHIMARU AND BEAT THAT TONGUE EXTENDING TECHNIQUE OUT OF HIM, THEN I'M GOING TO COME BACK AND SHOVE MY TONGUE SO FAR DOWN YOUR THROAT IT'S GONNA COME OUT YOUR ASS!"

Tsunade reeled back with a disgusted sneer on her face and then resumed shouting. "THAT'S DISGUSTING YOU SICK BASTARD! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW UNHYGIENIC THAT WOULD BE?!"

That's what you're angry about? The observes thought to themselves with massive sweatdrops, having been watching this spectacle with the dull looks of people who had no idea what the hell was going on.

Both Tsunade and Naruto glared at each other for several seconds longer, both breathing heavily, though mostly from all the shouting rather than the fighting.

"Well that was fun, but I'm afraid my wife and I really need to get going. We have a honeymoon to get started with after all." Naruto said as he made his way back towards Xanna, suddenly cheerful.

"You're going to leave, just like that?" Jiraiya asked.

"Pretty much." Naruto confirmed. "I've had some good times with you guys...well except for you Asuma, I don't really know you at all. Either way it's time to move on."

Asuma said nothing, but his look was very deadpan,

"You three girls!" Naruto continued, pointing a finger at Hinata, Sakura and Tenten, causing them to suddenly pay closer attention.

"Be good now and I hope at least one of you discovers the joys of being a pervert." He finished with a grin, much to Jiraiya's amusement.

"Naruto nii-san!" Embarrassment.

"Naruto-shishou!" Exasperation.

"Damnit Naruto!" Anger.

Ah, they were still so easy to rile up. He really was going to miss those three.

"Bye now." Mere moments after saying that, Naruto and Xanna vanished in a Hiraishin teleportation.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Tsunade sighed tiredly as she finally made it home. It had been such a long day and it wasn't even evening yet. Usually she wouldn't be home anywhere near this fast, but she had taken the day off on account of being so damn tired. Naruto really knew how to make a mess of things when he wanted to.

Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out the airtight capsule that Naruto had shoved into her mouth when he had kissed her. She hadn't dared open it anywhere in the open and it was another reason for ending her day so early.

Opening it revealed that it held only a single piece of paper with a seal inscribed on it. Below the seal itself was a tiny caption that said only 'Give me chakra!'.

Rolling her eyes, she did exactly that, dropped the seal and backed up a few steps. A tense minute later, Naruto appeared.

"Yo." Naruto greeted as if it was any other day.

Tsunade simply stared at him for a few seconds before she posed one simple question.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you kill the people you killed and why cause all that chaos?" Tsunade had needed to go over the damage and casualty reports and discovered that there was surprisingly little of either. If he had wanted to, Naruto could have crippled the village before they would have even gotten their wits about them.

"The chaos had two purposes. The first was for fun and the second was to help you." Naruto explained.

"Help me how?" Tsunade asked, slightly confused.

"By giving your shinobi a kick in the ass. Most of them are wimps that would have ended up being nothing but cannon fodder if they had to fight anyone really dangerous and I figured that showing them just how much they suck might help."

Tsunade sweatdropped slightly at that explanation. It wasn't exactly wrong and it was nice of him in a very weird way, but it was also a very strange way to go about things.

"And the killing?"

"Ah well, that was mostly revenge, but it's probably going to turn out being in your favor as well."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow and gestured for him to explain.

"The Hyuuga main house had it coming and they were nothing but a bunch of power hungry assholes anyway. Akiyama was a greedy, corrupt politician...so is Ishida actually, but I didn't want to make his daughters cry and the elders were too old to be of any use to you anymore. You need some younger blood on that council."

"But you only killed Danzo, Koharu and Homura were fine when I last saw them." Tsunade said in confusion, slightly worried that he had offed those two recently.

"I did something much worse to them." Naruto said with a wide grin, much to Tsunade's continuing confusion. "I made them retire."

Tsunade looked even more confused before she started thinking about it, After a while, the frown on her face vanished and she sighed. She had of course received their resignations and had been slightly suspicious about the timing, but now it made sense. Naruto had really hit them where it hurt with that.

"And Danzo?" She asked, making no further comment on the subject.

"Oh, he was the worst of the bunch. I'm sure you've found the corpses of his little private army?" He asked.

Tsunade nodded and gestured for him to continue.

"Well, did you know that he also had an arm made of your grandfather's cells and about ten Sharingan implanted into it?"

"WHAT?!" Tsunade exclaimed in shock.

"I'll take that as a no." Naruto said wryly.

"That bastard!" Tsunade fumed. "If I knew about that I would have killed him myself!"

"He was really annoying to kill too, kept turning his own death into an illusion with those Sharingan, not to mention that he could use the Mokuton." Naruto added, deciding to drop another bombshell.

Tsunade went pale as she connected the dots, recalling a certain ANBU member that could also use Mokuton thanks to the inhumane experiments of her traitorous teammate. It also explained the tree that had caused sprouted from underground. At first she had thought that perhaps Tenzo had done that, but then she recalled that he was out of the village on a mission.

"That bastard!" She repeated angrily. "He's been collaborating with Orochimaru, it's the only way that he could possibly have been able to use Mokuton techniques."

Naruto's ears perked up at that bit of information. He hadn't been aware that it was possible to steal a bloodline like that. He knew that he was distantly related to the Senju clan, so he guessed he probably had a better chance than Danzo at obtaining the Mokuton. Perhaps he really would hunt down the snake Sannin one of these days. Being able to grow forests at will would be all kinds of awesome.

"That invasion during your Chunin exam finally makes sense now! Orochimaru was far too well informed, even if he used to be a leaf Shinobi. Jiraiya and I have always suspected a traitor, but we thought Danzo to be too much of a patriot to work with the likes of Orochimaru."

"Ah well, it's taken care of now and I'm thinking of hunting down Orochimaru as well, so there's nothing to worry about." He said with a grin.

Tsunade gave another sigh and gave the taller blond a hug, which rather surprised Naruto. This was going a lot better than he had expected to be honest. He had been expecting at least one more punch to the face. Still, he said nothing and just put his arms around her.

"If you're going after Orochimaru then be careful, he's dangerous and I don't mean just because of his power." She warned.

"When am I not careful?" He asked rhetorically and then huffed when she shot him a disbelieving look.

They lapsed into silence for a few seconds before Tsunade spoke again.

"I was going to name you Rokudaime Hokage you know." She mumbled into his chest.

"That's a terrible idea Tsunade." He replied dryly. "What could have possibly made you think that would have ended well?"

"You can deny it all you want, but I think you would have done well as Hokage. Besides, you're the only one strong enough, nobody else has the same drive as you." She reasoned.

"It's a moot point now anyway and I want to see the world with Xanna instead of being tied to a desk."

She didn't say anything in response and Naruto spoke up again after a minute of silence.

"You want to have some goodbye sex?"

"Don't make me hurt you." She said, but there was no heat in her tone.

Naruto just chuckled at her response. "Well, I really need to get going now. Xanna wanted to talk to you about something as well. Don't ask me what, She wouldn't tell me." He added the last part when she gave him a questioning look.

"Close your eyes for a second Naruto." Tsunade prompted and Naruto did so, curious as to what she was up to.

He lowered his head when she pulled it down and felt something being placed over it and a kiss being pressed to his forehead soon after.

"Take good care of this for me, think of it as a wedding gift."

Naruto opened his eyes and discovered that the object she had put around his neck was the Shodai's necklace, something that he hadn't ever expected her to part with.

"Are you sure you should be giving me this Tsunade? It's an heirloom of your clan." Naruto asked, knowing how valuable it was to her.

"I'm the last of the Senju Naruto and I have no heirs. Thanks to you I've stopped thinking that it's cursed. Besides...somehow I think it was always meant to be yours and we're sort of related anyway."

"Well when you say it like that, how can I refuse?" He asked rhetorically with a grin.

"Just make sure you pass it on to a worthy successor when the time comes."

Naruto's eyes sparkled with mischief at the words. "Not to worry Tsunade, I won't ever let someone you wouldn't approve of to get their hands on it." Considering that he would live forever, he had no intention of passing the jewel on to anyone.

"By the way...I expect you to give me a cool Bingo book entry." Naruto said, suddenly serious.

Tsunade rolled her eyes at him and replied dryly. "Don't worry, I'll make sure it's really 'cool'."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Tsunade warily stood across from the redheaded demoness that Naruto had summoned and then left her alone with. Despite being the same woman that she had gone to the hot springs with that one time, she couldn't feel comfortable around her anymore, knowing what she was. It felt as if there was a constant, unspoken threat looming in the air.

She had to wonder if Naruto had known that people would feel like this around her once they knew her true nature. It would no doubt have been far worse for people who hadn't met her before.

"Well, what did you want to talk about?" She asked, doing her best to hide her discomfort, not knowing that it was impossible to hide such things from the redhead.

"I need your opinion on something as a medical professional." Xanna said, no longer bothering to suppress the chakra flow to her throat.

The raw power in her voice didn't make Tsunade feel any better, but she pushed it aside in favor of the words themselves. "What for? Is something wrong with Naruto?" She asked in worry, knowing that it was the only possible reason why the demoness would ask something like this.

"Not in the physical sense, but I am uncertain about his mental state." The redhead explained.

"A Yamanaka would be better in that case, they specialise in psychology." Tsunade replied as evenly as possible, keeping her worry in check.

"I do not know any and your knowledge should be sufficient." Xanna rebuffed.

"Alright then, tell me why you think something might be wrong with him." The blond assented.

"I sensed something strange from him some time ago and have been attempting to discern the cause of it myself, but I cannot be sure if I am correct, so I am looking for a second opinion. However, for you to fully grasp the situation I will need to tell you about parts of Naruto's early life."

With a sense of foreboding, Tsunade listened as the demoness began speaking.

Flashback

Xanna was angry and annoyed. Usually you wouldn't be able to care about being annoyed if you were angry, but this was a special case. Her anger stemmed from the fact that she had recently been sealed, while her annoyance was being caused by her newborn container.

She had managed to exert enough influence on the seal to change it from the disgusting sewer into a forest setting, but that did nothing to block out the incessant, annoying crying of the baby she was sealed into.

XXXXXXX

Several months had passed and the stupid baby still hadn't stopped crying!

She couldn't blame him for crying considering his circumstances, but it didn't make it any less annoying to her.

The orphanage where he had been placed was run by a woman that despised the boy for having her sealed inside him. She couldn't muster enough hatred to truly harm him or kill him, because in the end he was still a helpless baby, but she frequently 'forgot' to feed him or change his diaper or any number of small things.

And she never, ever held him, no matter how much he reached out to her.

XXXXXXX

Xanna was confused.

The baby(Uzumaki Naruto if she recalled his name correctly) had stopped crying some weeks ago and she didn't know why.

His skin was still chaffing because he needed a diaper change, he was still hungry because it had been too long since he had been fed and his desperation to be held had only gotten worse.

Why then, was he not crying anymore?

It would soon be a year since her sealing and listening to the constant pitiful wailing of her container and feeling how sad he was had eventually moved even her to pity him. The boy was completely innocent and didn't deserve to be treated like this. It would have been kinder to simply kill him instead of prolonging his misery like this.

The spiteful woman running the orphanage couldn't bring herself to do that, but in her ignorance, she was being far crueler.

Sighing to herself, she pulled the boy's infantile consciousness into the seal, wanting to know why he wasn't crying anymore.

Naruto's mental representation appeared and the young blond baby looked around curiously at the changed surroundings for a moment before staring at her with sad blue eyes.

Xanna stared back, waiting to see if he would do anything else, but he didn't, which confused her. She had expected him to reach out to her like he had been doing to any other adult he saw.

Sighing to herself again, she went to pick him up, feeling childlike surprise and then happiness flash across his thoughts at the act. When she had settled herself against the headboard of the bed she had created in the seal, still holding the young boy to her, she delved deeper into his thoughts and emotions in an attempt to discern what was going on. This was easier to do while being in contact with him like this.

It was confusing, because the thoughts of a baby were fleeting and tended to jump from one thing to another randomly, but she managed to discern the cause of his suddenly changed behavior.

He had simply given up. Whatever instinct had been telling him that crying would bring a parent to help him had been overridden by month after month of experience telling him that no matter how much he cried, nobody would ever come.

Even now he was clutching at her with as much desperate strength his young limbs allowed him, fearing that she would let go. Not having anything better to do and seeing no reason to deny him this, she held him closer and ran her fingers gently over his head.

She would have ended his misery right here and right now if she could, but the seal prevented her from doing him any harm.

A few minutes later she felt his chubby hand tugging aside the yukata she had fashioned for herself, then his mouth clamping over her nipple and sucking on it, which caused her to raise a crimson eyebrow at the boy.

"Idiot child, even if I had any milk to give you, it wouldn't do you any good in here." She muttered quietly and tried to pull him away.

Immediately he started tearing up, but was apparently trying to choke it down. Bitter experience telling him once again that crying would only serve to make his throat sore and eyes sting.

With yet another sigh, she brought him closer again and let him do as he pleased. He was just hungry and it seemed to make him feel better if nothing else. A baby being so depressing was just too pitiful for words.

XXXXX

A two year old Naruto cooed as he tried to grab onto the lock of red hair that Xanna was dangling in front of him, delighting in the game.

She had taken to bringing him into the seal every so often and the boy was always happy to see her. He didn't seem to retain any conscious memory of these visits, but she could see that he was behaving slightly differently.

Not only did he not cry anymore, but he had also taken to avoiding any adults that he saw(as much as he was able to as a baby anyway).

Xanna had also learned how to use tiny amounts of her chakra to keep his body going and extract as much energy from the meals he did get. She wasn't sure if the caretakers were doing it on purpose or not, but they gave him just enough food to keep him hungry almost constantly. But with her help, he was managing to stave off malnutrition.

XXXXXXX

Naruto happily babbled nonsense at the demoness that currently had him wrapped up in her tails, all the while waving another in front of him while he tried to catch it.

When he finally caught hold of it, he presented it to her triumphantly with a giggle and opened his mouth to speak.

"Kaa-san! Go' it!"

Xanna froze in shock at what he had called her. He had never called her that before.

In retrospect, perhaps she should have been expecting it. She was the only one that ever payed any attention to him after all, even if he couldn't remember it when he was awake.

She needed to set him straight though,

"I am not your mother Naruto." She said quietly, but firmly.

"Kaa-san!" He gurgled back at her, waving the bushy tail he was holding at her.

"No." She repeated.

He giggled at her and started chewing on the end of the tail. When she pulled it away from his mouth he giggled some more and spoke again. "Kaa-san gibbit!"

"I am not your mother." She said again, this time with a harder tone.

Naruto's lip started trembling and he buried his head into her chest, obviously distressed by her harsh tone.

Sighing, she petted his head and made some shushing noises that had so far never failed to calm him down. Naruto once more babbled something indistinct about 'Kaa-san' and went quiet, causing Xanna to sigh again. Less than three years old and he was already so stubborn.

She couldn't believe she was actually considering allowing him to call her that, but it wasn't as if he would remember when he woke up anyway.

XXXXXXX

Xanna hummed a random tune to the small blond boy she had wrapped up in her tails, calming him down from his latest nightmare. He had recently turned six and had been suffering from them for a couple of years now.

Apparently the more he grew, the less guilt the caretakers in the orphanage felt over inflicting various cruelties on him. They had subtly and sometimes not so subtly encouraged the other children to bully him, and it caused Naruto to live in constant fear of everyone there, resulting in nightmares plaguing his sleep.

The anniversary of her sealing had been a few days ago and Naruto had it particularly bad this time. Several of the older children had been scaring him by dangling him over a staircase and then eventually pushing him down. One of the caretakers had seen it, but the man had been drinking and only grinned in approval when he saw it happen.

Naruto had been lucky and hadn't broken anything, but he had been badly bruised and terrified. Not a single night had passed since then without a nightmare and the small boy was clutching at her and hiccuping as he tried to keep from crying.

"Kaa-san, why does everyone hate me?" He asked when he had calmed down a bit.

Xanna frowned as she considered what she should say,being called mother having become normal a long time ago. In the end she decided not to lie to him. "They hate you because of me."

"But why?" He asked and held onto her even more tightly.

"Because they are fools, do not concern yourself with the opinions of those who are worthless."

He nodded in acceptance and buried his head further into her embrace, feeling only happy and safe now that he was with her. He wished that he could stay like this forever.

Xanna sighed to herself again as she held him. Such a loving child should not have needed to tolerate this kind of abuse. He still didn't carry any memory of these visits into the waking world, but that didn't mean he got nothing out of it. Every time he woke, he felt a sense of comfort and support that would keep him going.

She didn't want to end his life anymore, being far more interested in seeing what would become of him now. In addition to that, she wondered when she would be able to speak to him fully, instead of just the subconscious part of him.

"Stay strong little one, I would like to see what you make of yourself."

XXXX

Nearly a year after that, Naruto's mind matured enough that she could no longer bring him into the seal by herself.

He met Ayame when he was seven years old and that relationship became very important to him. Despite that though, he still ached for something that he couldn't truly remember. All he knew was that there was a woman with red hair that he needed to remember, because she was the one who was the most precious to him. He could only feel safe and happy when she held him. It frustrated and saddened him endlessly that he couldn't remember.

Despite being unable to bring him into the seal anymore, Xanna continued to keep his body strong with her chakra and healing his injuries when he got them.

When he was ten years old, she deliberately allowed him to get hypothermia and used the muddled state of his mind to bring him to the seal again. She was surprised that he remembered her, but did not remember calling her mother. She was even more surprised by his declaration to marry her but didn't contest it.

She may have been the closest thing to a mother he had, but that didn't mean she actually was his mother and she wasn't the type to care about the moral implications anyway. Most humans would have felt sickened by the situation, but she honestly couldn't bring herself to care. It wasn't as if she actually believed that anything would come of it anyway.

The determination that he drew from it would serve him well in any case.

When he released her at the age of fifteen, she had intended to leave him to his own devices, but couldn't help coming back to visit him when she felt how sad he was at her absence.

When all of her attempts to redirect his attention to human women failed, she found herself developing genuine romantic interest in him instead of just the fondness she had before.

End flashback

Tsunade felt herself going several shades of pale as she listened to the story of Naruto's early years from Xanna's perspective. It didn't take a Yamanaka to figure out that this was bad.

"The thing I mentioned feeling was an intensely powerful sense of desperation for me to be alright after a certain...incident." Xanna said vaguely, alluding to Jashin's attempt at stealing her power.

Tsunade stayed quiet for a while longer, thinking over the things she had just heard. She wasn't going to make an issue of the mother-son relationship switching over to one of lovers. The demoness had already warned her that Tsunade was not to bore her with her silly human morals.

It was a known fact that babies didn't develop properly if they were neglected and this was by far the worst case of it that she had ever heard of. This was further compounded by the fact that Naruto was almost universally hated by everyone around him as he aged, with the abuse heaped at him worsening with every year.

On top of all this, he was enrolled into the shinobi academy, where he would be taught to fight and develop a killer instinct.

She couldn't be sure but she had a terrible suspicion that Naruto would have likely turned into a sociopathic monster that was utterly unable to empathise with the people around him if it hadn't been for Xanna and later Ayame providing a positive influence in his life. Once she thought of it from this perspective, it suddenly seemed obvious that Naruto had several sociopathic tendencies as it was, though they were fortunately(and rather miraculously, given what she had just heard) minor. His ego sometimes got the best of him and he could be a real asshole for the most inane of reasons. Ironically, She was glad that his complete lack of shame was manifested as rampant perversion. It could have easily turned out to be something far darker.

It was equal parts funny and sad that Konoha had the Kyuubi to thank for preventing another Orochimaru or something even worse from developing out of Naruto's life.

That was, if he hadn't completely lost the will to live before that could happen.

Damn you sensei! What the hell were you thinking when you just left him in the orphanage like that?! She thought to herself furiously, wishing her sensei was alive so that she could kill him herself for this monumental screw up.

Gathering her thoughts, she told Xanna all of this.

"And what would you say is his state of mind at the moment, concerning me in particular?" The demoness prodded further.

Tsunade's lips became thin lines as she thought of that particular mess. She couldn't blame the demoness for what she had done, especially since it was clear that Xanna hadn't even done it on purpose, but she didn't like what this conversation had brought to light either.

"Has he ever done anything to go against what you say?" She asked.

Xanna frowned in thought and gaver her answer. "Not that I can recall. He may argue or play around sometimes, but he always does as I say if I insist."

Tsunade closed her eyes and nodded, as that pretty much confirmed her suspicions.

"Naruto has most likely developed an incredibly powerful subconscious obsession with you over the years and will place your happiness, well-being and wishes over all else. He would probably feel compelled to do anything you asked him to do, no matter how terrible it was or how painful it would be to him and he wouldn't even know why. I can't even be sure if his love for you is real or just another part of his obsession."

"It is real, I would be able to tell the difference." Xanna assured.

"In any case, if you were ever to vanish from his life, then I have no idea what would happen to him, but it wouldn't be pretty."

"I see...That is about what I was expecting." The demoness said, her own theories confirmed. "I must have confused him terribly when I told him to sleep with other women, but it turned out well in the end." She muttered to herself.

"What will you do about this now?" Tsunade asked.

She would have liked to say that Naruto should be examined by a skilled Yamanaka therapist, but aside from the obvious problem of him now being a missing-nin, it would have likely been pointless.

All the therapy in the world wouldn't help someone who had never been given the chance to develop properly. In other words...you couldn't fix it if it was made broken.

"I am hoping that he will heal in time and even if he does not, it should be alright as long as I am there for him and I will live forever. Despite the damage that this place has inflicted on him, Naruto has risen above it and I believe he will continue to do so."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"All done?" Naruto asked with a smile as he called her back once he felt her activating the Hiraishin beacon he had given her. He was curious about what she and Tsunade had talked about for so long, but Xanna had asked him not to pry, so he wouldn't.

"Yes, now let us leave this place husband." She said and slipped her hand into his.

Naruto's face stretched into another idiotically wide grin at being called that. "Where are we going?"

"I am taking you to the ancient hunting grounds of the wolf tribe, now long ago defiled and abandoned." By her, but that wasn't important right now.

"Didn't you destroy that?" Naruto asked in bemusement.

"That was nearly a millenium ago. The land should have healed from that little temper tantrum of mine by now."

"If your temper tantrums are that bad, then I'd hate to see you when you're really angry." Naruto teased.

"Indeed you would husband, indeed you would." She agreed seriously.

"That was supposed to be a joke..." He said, sweatdropping.

The demoness merely hummed mysteriously and did not respond.

Yes, Naruto would be just fine. She would make sure of it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

OMAKE: Hokage Naruto.

Naruto drummed his clawed fingers on the table in front of him in absolute boredom as Homura droned on about something or other that he didn't give a crap about. Goddamn council meetings.

Why the hell had he allowed Tsunade to talk him into taking the hat again? For the life of him he couldn't recall the reason, but he suspected vast amounts of alcohol and boobs were involved.

Not that he ever wore the hat though. In fact, he was dressed the exact same way as he always was.

"Alright that's enough, I've got a few announcements to make." Naruto declared, cutting Homura off mid-sentence.

"Hokage-sama?" Several people questioned curiously.

"Firstly, from now on, you will no longer refer to me as 'Hokage-sama'."

"Errrr, what are we supposed to call you then?" Chouza asked uncertainly.

"I shall be henceforth referred to as 'Supreme Master Leader'." He declared grandly.

"May I ask why you wish to be called that Ho-" Inoichi went to ask and cut himself off when a pair of narrowed gold-orange eyes glared at him. "I mean, Supreme Master Leader sir."

"No, you may not."

The entire council sweatdropped massively at this apparent bout of randomness from their leader, but nobody dared gainsay him.

"Except for you Tsume, you can call me 'Daddy'." He said to the Inuzuka clan head with a wink and a grin, causing the woman to gape at his audacity with a slight blush on her face.

"Hokage-sama! The council meeting chamber is no place for this kind of tasteless humor!" Koharu scolded with a scowl.

"Why yes, Koharu, Homura, I will be glad to accept your resignations from the council. Though I am sure that we are all sad to see you go, there is no denying the fact that you are far past the age of retirement." Naruto said in a falsely solemn tone, speaking over Koharu's lecturing.

"But we are not resigning!" Homura protested.

"What's that? You want me to use your pensions for rebuilding the part of Konoha where Danzo met his end in that freak chain of exploding note accidents? We are all humbled by your dedication to Konoha."

The two elders's lips thinned but they didn't dare say another word. No doubt they would be further penalized if they did so. The reminder of Danzo's not-so-subtle 'accident' only served to underline that the blond had no compunction about playing dirty.

Naruto nodded to himself in satisfaction, this was more like it.

"I'm getting kind of hungry...You there!" He pointed at councilor Kimura, causing the woman to start nervously, wondering what this madman was going to do now.

"Go make me a sandwich."

Said woman gaped at him stupidly for several long seconds before replying. "But that's what the servants are for!"

"BITCH, I kill people!" He suddenly roared at her and slammed his palms on the table hard enough to turn it into sawdust, nearly giving everyone present a heart attack. "Now go make me that goddamn sandwich before I eat you!"

The ANBU detail that was acting as security looked at the woman suspiciously, suspecting her to be an enemy spy. She had clearly just used the Body Flicker to get out of the room that fast. Later investigations would reveal that she had instinctively used the little bit of chakra she had in fear driven adrenaline.

"Now for the final order of business before I'm fed up with dealing with you people for today...The Kyuubi festival is approaching soon."

Everyone felt a distinct sense of foreboding at those words.

"Now, I find it funny that despite it being called the Kyuubi festival, it's not actually dedicated to the Kyuubi, so I'm going to clear up that little bit of confusion. Akiyama, Ishida, I'm putting you two in charge of composing an epic song dedicated to the glory of the great demon fox. I think one hour for each tail should be appropriate." Naruto declared, nodding to himself as if he had just come up with something truly inspired.

"But-" Akiyama went to protest, but got cut off when Naruto spoke over him.

"That is, unless of course you feel incapable of carrying out the duties assigned to you as members of the council and would like to resign from your post?"

"No, Supreme Master Leader sir." They chorused miserably. Why did it feel as if their cushy jobs on the council had just become hell?