Mr. Perfect

Have you ever been too excited to sleep the night before a big event, and then rushed the next morning and forgot what you needed to bring? Well, this is exactly what happened to Xiao Lan and me. It was Xiao Lan's fault that we stood at the counter an hour before our departure time, and I forgot to bring our two most important things: my wallet and our passports.

Xiao Lan and I were standing at the door with two suitcases, waiting for Jack to bring my satchel with Xiao Lan and my passport inside it.

I frowned frantically, "It's all your fault." I glared at Xiao Lan.

Xiao Lan stupidly defended himself, "Why is it my fault? I'm not the one who spent the whole night rewatching the 1995 version of The Condor Heroes."

I looked at Xiao Lan and said, "That's exactly what I meant. I was the one who re-watched Condor Heroes, but you were the one who slept all night with perfect rest. You should be prepared instead of waiting for me. So, if a person is at fault here. ...that person is you." I poked Xiao Lan's left chest with my finger.

Xiao Lan mocked, "Okay, okay, it's all my fault, Mr. Perfect."

I scoffed, feeling offended. I sarcastically said, "My fault? Hey? You said it like it was my fault?" I turned in the other direction. "Let's go back twelve hours earlier."

Xiao Lan said, "The story should not come from your mouth, you are always biased in everything."

My jaw dropped and I said, "I'm not."

Xiao Lan said, "Yes, every time you share your stories, it is you who fights against the world, you are a hero, and everyone else is a villain."

I said, "Okay, but you can't tell the story either."

Xiao Lan said, "Right now there are just the two of us. If neither of us is allowed to tell the story, who will?"

"I can."

I looked around, "Who?"

"I."

I asked, "I... who?"

"The old tooth inside your pocket."

I turned around and saw the Persian man standing between us with his arms crossed.

I said, "I totally forgot about you." I sighed. "Fine, you're the third wheel, so you tell the story." I got closer. "You'd better tell the story accurately and without prejudice."

The Persian man said angrily, "I'm a leader of ten thousand men. If I am biased, those people will not follow me to war."

I said, "Fine. Fine. Fine..."

The Persian man said, "Okay, I'm going to start. Twelve hours before Xiao Lan and Jig board their flight to Da Nang, Vietnam."

I shouted, "Stop! Why say Xiao Lan's name before my name? You should say my name first, I'm the protagonist of the story, it's normal for my name to come first."

The Persian man said, "This is my story, I can say whatever I want. Be quiet."

Twelve hours before Xiao Lan and Jig were too broad their flight to Da Neng Vietnam, Xiao Lan was cooking dinner in the kitchen, and Jig was watching the second episode of 1995 TV Version of Return of the Condor Heroes which lead by Louis Koo and Carmen Lee, lying down on the sofa to his right, a pillow is sandwiched between his legs.

Xiao Lan put the dishes on the table and said, "Jig, dinner is ready?"

Jig said loudly from the living room, "Xiao Lan, bring the food into the living room, I want to eat and watch the drama."

Xiao Lan brought the food to the coffee table and sat on the sofa at Jig's feet. Xiao Lan and Jig ate dinner while watching the TV series. After dinner, Jig lay back with his pillow between his legs and continued to watch his TV series. By the time Jig finished episode six, Xiao Lan had packed all the suitcases and was ready to go to bed.

Xiao Lan walked into the living room and said, "Jig, take a shower and go to bed. Our plane leaves at 7:00AM and we have to be at the airport at 6:00AM to check in."

Jig said with a displeased face, "I know, you go to bed first, I can stay up late, I will sleep on the plane."

Xiao Lan said, "I have prepared the suitcase, remember to bring our passports."

Jig said irritably, "Don't nag me, I know!"

Xiao Lan walked into the bedroom, for fear that Jig would forget his passport, so he stuffed the passport into Jig's satchel with Jig's passport and put the satchel on the bedside table next to Jig's charging mobile phone. Xiao Lan went to bed.

It was 4:20 a.m. by the time jig started to watch episode 15 of "The Legend of the Condor Heroes". Jig made it as far as episode 15 because he fasts forwards any parts he doesn't like. It's fair to say that Jig is obsessed with this TV Series. By the time Jig finished episode 15, it was 4:46AM. Jig decided to call it quit because Jig couldn't keep his eyes open at this point. He put the coffee cup on the table and went to bed.

At 5:00, Xiao Lan got up, and at 5:20, Xiao Lan was ready with the two suitcases at the door. He went into the bedroom and found Jig still sleeping. He woke Jig up, and when Jig walked into the bathroom, Xiao Lan said, "Jig, it's 5:20 in the morning, we're leaving at 5:30, don't forget your shoulder bag by your charging phone."

Jig frowned angrily, "I know...you don't have to nag me all the time, my God..." Jig walked into the bathroom angrily.

Xiao Lan in the living room shouted, "What do you want to eat?"

Jig shouted angrily, "NO!"

Jig was getting dressed when Xiao Lan walked into the bedroom. Xiao Lan said, "Chi is here, I'll take down the suitcases first, remember to bring your mobile phone and your shoulder bag; our passport is inside."

Jig said irritably, "I know, you go downstairs first."

The Persian man looked at me with an ugly smirk, "Well, that's a fair third party's unbiased version of the story."

I looked at the Persian man standing smiling at me. I was a little annoyed by what he just said. I know I'm not that kind of person, I mean I can be a jerk sometimes, but I'm not that kind of person. I know that the stupid spirit who refusing to move on just made up this stuff, and as soon as I got back from Vietnam, I will shatter this tooth of many decades old to kingdom come.

I said, "Enough or I'll throw your old rotten teeth down the drain, and you can live in the drain for the next, oh who knows how long." The Persian man hissed at me with his yellow teeth, and then he disappeared. I took out my phone and dialed Jack's number. The phone rang, but Jack didn't answer. I called twice and Jack didn't answer. "What's wrong with Jack for not answering my call?"