Ear-splitting

The most relaxing song I knew blasted through my one earpiece on repeat. Sneakers squeaking on the school tiles were bothering the other ear. With the backpack hanging on one shoulder and heavy eyelids, I walked in the opposite direction than all of my classmates. Completely ignored the fact that Namjoon was probably on his way to the lake only to realize that I wasn't there.

This part of the school was quiet, random voices echoed against the empty walls once in a while, but the desks that were abandoned here and there, on the hallways covered in the dust made me feel the kind of unease that only haunted houses could evoke in my opinion.

'This person really doesn't want to be bothered, huh…'

The sliding door didn't protest and the inside of the chemistry lab that was hardly ever used was cleaner than the hallway. But the air was just as stale.

'No one's here.'

Near the big dirty window from the middle of the room was the only live being.

'A snake…How? And why?'

I stared at it like it could provide me with telepathic answers. Went as far as to turn off the music to listen to it hiss. It was strangely curious of my presence and unafraid.

Decided to leave a moment before the door slid open once more and then slammed shut after the short, skinny boy that was Min Yoongi.

"What's up?" A casual tone tried to mask the stiffness of the body whilst he walked towards the closest chair, sat down, and rose his feet up on the desk. As though coming to this room sucked all the energy out of him.

I exhaled deeply on purpose, hoping that it'd alleviate some of my newfound frustration.

"You're the one who wrote the note?"

"Indeed."

The phone started singing in my pocket as if to remind me that where I was, wasn't where I should've been at this moment in time.

"Fine. What do you want?"

Slightly shifting in his seat, he glanced from the eyes that were now shooting fire his way at the blackboard without a change in facial expression.

A blank page.

After more than a minute went by without him uttering one word, I stormed towards the door.

"Jungkook." He said, quickly.

Dead in my tracks, I twisted my neck to the left, at the person that I had once thought of as a dear friend, and scowled at the new picture I was witnessing.

Chemicals, vials, beakers of all shapes and sizes stored inside glass cabinets, many plants flowing down shelves surrounded by peeling, cracked walls was the background to the mint-colored hair that touched the desk, whose feet now were on the ground, arms stretched out towards me and eyes that seemed to betray some emotion at last.

"Jungkook." He repeated, and before I could swear, he continued: "I know."

"What do you know?"

"Everything."

I smirked, irritated.

"Be a bit more specific. I don't have much patience right now."

"That day when we fought, the reason I…" he bit his lip and shut his eyes as if that memory was painful to him. The same memory that made my fists tingle, "You weren't lying. I was the one who was…wrong."

"Bo-ho, you figured it out. How many years later?!"

"Listen, I…"

"You should've trusted me then, but you didn't. Go back to your friends and leave me al…" I spat with malice, wishing it could leak from my irises and jump at him if possible. He cut me off, saying:

"I was wrong and I'm sorry."

My chest hurt. The world was at a standstill. So, I inspected every line on his face, waiting for a smile that screamed: 'Ha, ha, gotcha!' just before his fake friends would burst through the door and pin me to the ground. I said nothing because I was waiting.

But the sun continued to sneak lazily through the clear patches of the window and the snake continued slithering around its cage.

He got up.

So, I ran.

Like a coward.

Not only out of that room but through the old and new hallways and then, out the school. By the time I spotted the lake to my right and Namjoon under a tree, studying calmly, I could barely stand. Hands-on knees and panting. I almost wanted to run past him since I wanted to avoid being asked anything.

But then I looked up at him and saw the grin he wore from ear to ear, and I died a little bit inside.

'Why are you, so happy? And why am I so… miserable? I don't even have a real reason to be.'

"Where were you?" He reached out and caressed my arm as I laid down by his side, on the grass.

"To the bathroom. I'm feeling a bit sick…"

"That's why you look so flustered? Do you want to go to the nurse or…?" I cut him off.

"No, I just want to close my eyes for a bit." And leaned against his shoulder whilst he continued reading in silence.

Two birds decided to fight not too far away from us which made me look just in time to see Yoongi striding down the same path I did.

My heart panicked, wanted to jump out but got stuck in my throat. Or at least, that's how it felt.

Wide-eyed, yet completely still, I watched him steal a glance our way but passed by without saying a word. And then he was gone.

'Does he know about Namjoon and I? Does he know everything? Everything…'

I clutched the hem of his dark grey shirt like that action alone was keeping me from drowning. I gasped for air and thought: 'Screw him.'

And forced my eyes shut.

Minutes passed, memories started circling me like pesky insects in the grave-like silence that was perturbed only by the relentless birds and the occasional wind. Despite the fact that I yawned at least three times, my mind didn't allow me to rest. I just hung onto Namjoon like a clingy girlfriend and despaired at the thought of having to stay just a few steps away from Yoongi tomorrow.

'Stop it. He said his part. It's over. We're just going to go back to ignoring each other as we've done for years. Right? Right…?'

"Aren't you cold?" His voice made me snap from whatever hole I had fallen into.

"A bit," I said, in a daze.

"I want some ramen. Let's go to the store and then home. Sounds good?"

"Perfect."

Arms linked, we walked down the empty street and then parted as soon as we entered the supermarket.

"What flavor?"

"Duck."

"Really?"

"It has the sweetest condiments."

"Ah…of course."

"What do you like?"

"Plain old chicken. Or beef. Both are fine though."

"They taste almost the same."

"That's what I am saying." He dropped a lot of packages of the same in the cart and then turned to me, asking: "Alright, what else?"

"What do you mean? You said you wanted ramen. We got it."

"We also need shampoo, a shower gel and there's this spicy sauce that really goes well with this ramen."

"Wow, you really hate me using your shampoo that much, huh?"

"No. I just like yours better."

"You're not sniffing me when I am not paying attention, are you?"

"Busted." He smiled. "Go get those, I'll go get the liquid of Gods. Meet me at the sweets aisle?"

"Sure."

Before I got to make a full turn to the left, someone had walked up to Namjoon, and even if I was only a few feet away, I couldn't hear a word the two guys were saying.

Words that caused him to smile.

The more I studied their faces and clothes, the more I couldn't put my finger on who they were.

'Friends? Junkies?'

When one of them suddenly peeked in my direction, I darted and collided with an older lady with force.

"I am sorry."

"Look where you're going, young man."

"I am so sorry." I continued to mumble, looking apologetic and making sure I wasn't visible from this spot at the same time.

She huffed and walked away.

I almost sprinted towards the bathroom products.

'Rose scented, macadamia milk infusion…who the heck was they? Orange, pistachio, or coffee? I can't know everyone he knows; we've only been going out for a while. It's only normal he's met a lot of people. He wasn't a secluded monk like I was.'

I picked one up only to put it back.

'I don't think Namjoon's going to like the chocolate shower gel as much as I do though. Maybe they were just other customers asking for help? But only older people do that when they forgot their glasses. Besides, they didn't look much older.'

I got up with the same gel in hand and saw that Namjoon was right next to me.

"Really? Does everything have to be chocolate with you?"

"Not necessarily, but I didn't want to smell like a flower, a fruit, or coffee beans. It will make me want to drink coffee and I shouldn't, you know, anxiety and all."

"Chocolate it is then." He sighed.

"No, no. You can pick another one if you want. What was the one you had before?"

"I don't remember. Let's just take this one. Go get your shampoo and two toothbrushes."

'Sure. If you tell me who the heck those two guys were first. That'd be great.'

"What? Is there something on my face?" That's when I realized that I was spacing out without blinking.

"No. I was just thinking."

"About?"

"Nothing much."

"What the hell?" He chuckled.

I went towards the shampoo, picked the one that Namjoon said he liked, and choose a pack of toothbrushes for two.

"What else?"

"I think that's it. Oh no. Get some sweets too; I am not coming back here in one hour."

"It's fine. I am not craving any."

I turned around, heading to the cashier when he left the shopping cart on the ground, by my feet.

"Ok. Do we need to go to the pharmacy?"

"Why?"

"Didn't you hear the blasphemy you just uttered?" He joked, but when I didn't as much as blink, his cheery tone turned into one charged with concern: "What's wrong?" Namjoon took a step forward, hand squeezing before it fell by his sides. Seemingly aware of our surroundings.

"I already told you that my stomach hurts and I didn't sleep at all. It's not a big deal. I just want to go to bed."

He sighed even louder than before.

"Save a spot in line, I am getting chocolate for tomorrow then."

I picked up the cart and in the last spur of the moment, I shouted: "Get some croissants too!"

Facing away, he let me know with a thumbs up that he heard me and disappeared into the right aisle.

After I secured a spot at the end of the line, I also saw one of the two guys paying for some meat and booze.

I pouted, watching them leave, feeling frustrated.

Certain that I'll finally be able to escape all my worries and sink into oblivion the second I lie down on any flat surface.

But I didn't. Even if he told me to eat first and that the water will take only a few minutes to boil, I felt like it was possible to fall asleep, but my eyes snapped open the second my cheek touched the pillow. All veins raging on adrenaline.

"Jungkook! Do you want to try the sauce first? I am not sure it will please your...palate."

"Sure…sure…" I mumbled, tiredly, on my way to the kitchen.

One bowl of ramen later with no sauce made by the Gods from hell to ruin the faint sweetness of unknown spices, I was face down on the table. Mesmerized in a sick kind of way by the table and the view of the garden. Or a fence that separates the forest and this house. And by Namjoon doing homework like the model student he is.

"Stop it," I demanded, hand covering the notebook.

"If you can't sleep, then you should do yours as well."

"Why should I? The exams are the ones that count, well, and the tests, but we have no tests this week."

I comfortably buried my face in my arms and then quickly asked: "We don't have any tests this week, right?"

"No." He sighed and went on. "And it does matter. It will boost the overall score by a lot of points. It can make a difference from being an average student to an excellent one."

That sentence alone made me snatch the pen from his hand with a weary smile.

"Who said I wanted to be an excellent student?"

"Would it hurt? You have me now. I can help."

"Then help me fall asleep!"

"Have some warm milk and give back my pen."

I was dangling it back and forth in front of him. And he fixated on it for a bit like a cat would follow a toy with its eyes.

"After ramen? That's not a good combination. Besides, shouldn't I be able to sleep by now? Why the hell can't I sleep?!" I complained, looking down.

He seized the opportunity and grabbed my wrist with one hand and took the pen with the other swiftly.

I was pouting, waiting for another chance to attack when he muttered: "Is something bothering you?"

"Well…" I bit my lip and whispered "yeah."

"Want to tell me about it?"

"No. Also, I don't think that's the reason why I can't fall asleep."

"Of course, it isn't." He ironically mumbled.

I scowled. And then a weak bulb turned itself on inside my mind.

"Ah, right! Talking of tests reminded me, Kwan saw me at work! She told me to tell you that she wants you to come to the next club meeting. You know, to help her with math or whatever. I promised I'll drag you no matter what. And also, Bora's having her first performance with the dancing crew! We should go see it together."

"How did you go from tests to…Never mind. Why do you want to go?"

"What do you mean, why? It'll be fun."

"You want to go out, how come?"

"Hey, only one of us is allowed to be in a bad mood at a time." I pointed a finger at him accusatorily, but he wasn't even looking up.

'Pay attention to me.' I heard the thought echo from somewhere far away from a corner of my subconscious, as if it wasn't mine.

I swallowed hard and retreated my finger.

"So, do you want to go?"

"Where?"

"To the club?! And to Bora's thing?"

"Yes and yes." He slammed the notebook shut which had me smiling. Thinking he was finished only to see another notebook replacing the other when my phone started ringing.

"It's Fred." I read out loud, and he simply took it as if it was his own.

"Oy, where's your new phone?"

"Hi. Yeah, I did…a bit later. Nothing...? That's odd. Alright. Half an hour's good?... See you then."

The phone was back on the table and his eyes were on me for the first time since we finished eating.

"I have to go to Fred's in thirty minutes."

"I heard."

"I have to…"

"Deliver. I know. Your job."

"Right."

We both went silent.

The second notebook was wide open next to another book. So, I resumed my sleeping position on the table with my feet stretched out under the table above his.

"You know what?" He suddenly exclaimed.

"No. Wha…" I replied, bored.

Completely taken aback when I felt his hands lifting me up by the armpits and then taking me towards the bedroom.

"I am not in the mood!" I shouted.

Only to be hit in the face with a large black t-shirt after he placed me on the floor like I was a fragile object, but an object nonetheless.

"Shut up. Put this on and take your pants off."

"Ah…Namjoon. You have to be somewhere else really soon and even if I can't fall asleep, I am still tired."

I muttered whilst he was pulling the curtains down, closing the door, and arranging the bed.

"Come on, I don't have much time." He undressed me without hesitation. My naked skin made contact with the air for a second before the shirt was forced on.

My eyes were shut out of sheer surprise, but when any touch ceased, I opened them to see him patting the pillow loudly.

"Ok…" I whispered and laid down facing him only to get turned around and spooned.

"What now?" I asked after a few seconds of utter silence.

"Tell me what's bothering you."

"Ha? What kind of sick therapy is this?!"

"Shut up."

"You just told me to talk."

"Yes. Tell me everything that's on your mind. I won't say anything about it unless you want me to. I won't judge you. I won't even hold it against you. Whatever you say, the moment I walk out that door, I won't even bring it up if you don't want to."

I tried to turn around and look at him, but he just lightly pushed me right back.

"I promise." He added.

"Alright… but doesn't this feel strange. It feels strange to me. And I don't know if it's even possible to do that. I mean…"

"If you want to bring it up later, sure. But for now. Just tell me everything and spare no detail."

"Is this some psychological technique I don't know about?" I joked.

"Kinda. My grandma used to do this all the time when I was younger. I had really bad insomnia. If you want, I could offer multiple plausible solutions to your problems or just assess the ones you've already thought of."

"I don't know if…"

"I don't want to be mean, but I really have to go in" He checked the phone next to him, "less than twenty-five minutes, so stop thinking and start speaking."

"Okay, okay…"

The room was considerably darker, the books on the chair by the door were in the same position as they were when I first entered this room, but the backpack in front of the closet was mine.

I reached for the hand that was against my stomach and held it still. Like a weak guarantee that he won't move until I'm finished.

"You remember what we did…in the shower?" I asked, but then realized he was supposed to listen without much talking, so I just continued when the silence stretched around us, making it even more awkward. "So, when you choked me…" I wanted to check for his expression, but as soon as I glanced behind me, I heard a deep:

"Go on."

"Alright," I cleared my throat, "when you choked me and then you know, made me...orgasm. It was one of the best ones I've ever had." I admitted both him and myself, cleared my throat again, this time, out of embarrassment. "And I really wanted to do that again, but I was kind of afraid to ask. And that's not even it. What am I saying? It's just... last night after you fell asleep…I realized how much I like spending time with you and that I might be getting addic...used to having you around. And that I'd really hate it if you were gone."

Face burning, adrenaline pumping, I waited.

"That's it?"

"What do you mean, that's it?!"

"Well, is there anything else bothering you?" His tone was calm, mine, a shout.

"What the hell?!"

I tried to look at him and again, meanwhile, he held me in place whilst I twisted my neck to no avail.

"Do you want to leave it at that? Are you alright with just telling me or do you want my take on it? I don't think there's much to solve though…"

"No. I'd like your input. Or something…"

"Firstly, I'd love to choke you again. In fact, I think I would've done it anyway, honestly. But I am happy to know you enjoy it as much as I do, so there's that." I bit the inside of my lip and closed my eyes. The burning sensation stretched from my cheeks to my neck.

'Ground, just swallow me whole. Why did I even tell him about it? I am so…'

"Secondly, I also got used to you and I'd be miserable if you left me…again. I think I made that pretty obvious last time. But I am glad you feel the same way about that as well."

I forced a chuckle in an attempt to bring my newfound shame to a halt.

"Really? That's it? Alright."

"What do you want me to say? I mean, I'm not going anywhere. Not willingly. And next time you try to leave, I've decided to just tie you up. I'd say by a bed, but I'd have to buy one first."

"That doesn't sound right…"

"Is that it? You like it when I choke you and you like, well, me?"

My embarrassed smile faded and my hand gripped him even harder.

"Well, no. That's not all."

"I'm listening."

The burning subsided and the awareness of my breathing increased.

"You know…Min…Yo..." Voice died in my throat as if the source that was coming from welled up in an instant.

"Who?"

"Min…Min Yoongi?"

"Green hair? Skinny? From our class?"

"Yeah. Him."

"What about him?" His breathing felt heavier against the back of my neck.

'Here goes nothing.'

I then started rambling without inhaling much air:

"I don't know if you noticed then, but we used to be friends when we were young. Like kindergarten and first grade, I think. I don't remember much, but…we got into a fight because some other guys told him I stole something, and then that my parents weren't abroad, that they were murderers. Anyways, they kept spreading rumors about me and he didn't buy any of it. But there was this one rumor that he believed. I don't know why. He cared about… that. I don't want to go too much into details. It's dumb. To this day, it's ridiculous. But since then, he started bullying me with the same kids who started the rumors, and one day, he just stopped…entirely. He didn't even come near me on purpose. And we never talked since then…until today."

I could feel him slightly moving behind me, so I just added the other hand to the one that was holding his.

"I don't want revenge for anything! Please don't say anything to him about it. I don't care. The past is the past. It's all done. We were young, but today he apologized …to me." My voice broke once again and I felt my eyes getting wet. "And I don't know. I just couldn't believe him. He used to…pretend he wanted to make up with me only to trick me into doing stuff or to…anyways, he used to lie, a bit. Actually, a lot. And now, I don't think he was lying. I am entirely sure why. Still, there's no point in being friends anyways. I am fine with us not being friends anymore, I think. I don't know why I feel like this…I wanted to forget about it, but when he apologized, I felt like I was a kid again, and that nothing had changed. That my peaceful days were over. I was afraid that it was all just a ploy. And if it wasn't then…that made me scared as well. Then I thought, how did he even find out they lied? Did he get into a fight with them and they used me to inflict emotional pain? Is he in trouble? Why did he even care enough to apologize? Why do I care? What even am I supposed to do?!"

The last sentence struggled its way out and tears just escaped without my consent. And the hand I thought would let go embraced me further.

Turned me around and hugged me whilst caressing my head.

"Do you want me to suggest a solution or you don't want to talk about it ever again?"

"Help me…" I cried out.

"Jungkook, you don't have to do anything right now. You don't have enough information to make a clear-cut decision. Of course, anyone would be confused. It'd be better if you can just wait and see how things play out. If you think he's really changed, then you can test him out for one last time."

"Test…?" I started hiccupping. He placed a kiss on my forehead.

"Yeah. Bring him here, or to your house. Doesn't matter, a place on your terms is good. A public place can work too. Bottom line is, don't end up alone with him, no matter what he says. And if his friends touch even a single hair on your head, I'll make them wish they had never as much as peeked your way since the day they were born. So, don't worry, alright?"

His warm smile and his words didn't match, but for some reason. I felt safe and sleepy.

I nuzzled further into his chest and joined my hands around his neck.

"He's not a bad guy…I know it." I added.

"Probably. I don't know him well though I could never forget him."

"What do you mean?"

"All three of us used to be in the same class, remember?"

"Right. But we didn't talk much then… I wonder why we almost never…talked."

"Well, we both had our own problems at that time."

"Did you and him ever…"

"No. We didn't talk much either. You and I had different…lives back then. And I liked being alone."

"Oh yeah. I remember that I only heard your voice when you were answering the teacher in class or something."

A smile broke on my face at the memory of the smaller version of us and at the same time, found it weird how two kids that stood in the opposites sides of the class and social spectrum were now embracing in the same bed.

"Do you feel any better?" He asked.

"I think so. Hold on, I need to blow my nose."

I managed to twist towards the door, but his lips collided with mine along the way and kept me in place.

I didn't expect him to get on top of me or for his tongue to invade my mouth. I went with the flow, but it was too much. I was gasping for air and trying to pull away when one hand started going up my back. His weight prevented me from moving and his mouth muffled any complaints I had.

"Na…" I struggled to get out the rest, but his tongue kept playing with mine.

He pulled back. A string of saliva connecting us.

Hands-on both cheeks, forehead against my forehead, he inhaled and exhaled as if he was in pain.

I was panting and dizzy.

"Why'd you do that?" I breathed out.

"Remember when I said that I won't keep things from you again?"

"Yeah."

I tried to see him through puffy eyes. Ignoring the stuffed nose yet even after squinting my eyes, he was blurry.

"Thing is…the reason why Yoongi stopped bothering you, or all of his friends really, was because I…"

His phone started ringing from the other room.

He groaned.

"What did you do?!" I quickly regained his attention.

He sighed.

"I want to lie and say that I simply warned them. I really do. But things escalated quickly, and I kind of …beat them up." My eyes went wide, he went on: "I didn't like what they were doing to you. I saw it. Everyone knew, but no one did anything. So, I…"

"You…were the one who beat them up? You were the reason why all of them skipped class for a week and why two…"

"Yeah."

'Of course! He also missed class at the same time then. How did I not put two and two together?!'

Our noses touched and our eyes were linked. Mine wide open, his, half-closed.

His two eyes turned into four.

"They got hurt because of me?" Gratitude for the years of peace that followed tried me, but fear was also pulling on my heartstrings.

"There's more."

The phone started ringing from the other room again.

I closed my eyes.

"He, Yoongi grabbed a pipe or stick, I don't remember which one but, he hit me in the back of the head with it. However, I didn't blackout. So, I was the one who…broke his," he inhaled and whispered, "arm or shoulder. Whatever... then, I just heard a crack."

I tried to lean against my elbows, unable to blink, staring at him, but seeing nothing.

"The reason why he was in the hospital for weeks and why he wore that cast, it was you?! All you?!" I pushed him away, and he just let me scoot back, new tears forming.

"He wasn't able to lift his arm for months."

"I know."

"He's still not allowed to play any sports."

"I know."

"He's still taking pills in class for…"

"Jungkook. I know…"

"He hit you in the head?" I wiped the tears and felt my face burning up.

"We were kids. He probably didn't know any better either. I didn't know my own strength and I was bleeding; I was angry and scared…Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like I am some kind of villain. They were horrible to you, writing things on your desk, spitting in your food, needles in your shoes, stealing your books, spreading lies, calling you names...making you trip and cry in the bathroom alone! They must've thought they could beat me good and keep going, but I…"

"Thank you."

A second of utter quietness followed.

"For what?"

"For protecting me."

I somehow, slipped from under him while he stared, bewildered.

He also got up.

"You don't mean that! You look scared!"

"I am not."

"Then why are you looking at me like that?!"

"Like what?!"

"Like I am about to hit you!"

"Stop yelling at me!"

"I didn't mean to…"

The phone was blasting again. Namjoon covered his mouth.

"Go answer it."

"No. Jungkook. Look at me!"

He closed the distance between up and held my hands before he whispered: "I liked you. No. The boy I had a big crush on was being mistreated, and not even for a good reason. I didn't mean to fuck his shoulder for life. That was not in my plan. It just happened. Sometimes I wish that I would've just passed out after he hit me..."

"I know. I am just tired and…You only did it because you wanted to help."

"Yes."

"And they were all assholes anyway."

"Every single one of them."

"Besides Yoongi."

He paused.

"Besides Yoongi." And repeated.

"Tell me just one more thing though…"

My phone started ringing as well.

"What?"

I bit the inside of my lip hard enough to feel pain.

His eyes went wide after I asked: "Dal's broken leg, you did that too?"

Mouth agape.

The phones were the only ones making noise.

At last, he nodded.

"He…tried to break mine. So, I broke his." An argument that I didn't want to hear.

"It's fine," I said, loudly. "It's fine!"

He didn't look convinced.

I wiped my tears with my sleeve, his hands still holding mine.

"It's all in the past." I continued. "It's Fine."

"Is it?!"

"No. It's not! But you regret it now, don't you?"

"Of course I do. They were my classmates. One of them was your friend! Things just…went horribly wrong Jungkook. It was six against one! They could've killed me if they wanted to. They could've killed me by mistake too. I just wanted to make them stop hitting me, but they wouldn't give up…"

"Right. It's fine. Just don't… do it again."

"But if they start bullying you again..."

"I will figure it out myself."

"Jungkook!"

"No. They probably heard about the guy you destroyed last month, was it? They wouldn't try their luck again, well, if they even knew we are together which they don't. But like you said, they were kids. They grew up. Only Yoongi and Dal are in our class now. So, it'll be fine."

"I won't break any of their bones. I can punch without breaking anything now."

"Are you that sure?" It came out more judgmental than I wanted it to.

The constant ringing was giving me a headache.

"Yes." He said, clearly meaning it.

"I believe you'd try. But I'll handle it by myself if something happens anyways."

"Please. If you get in trouble, tell me. Don't hide things from me. I didn't hide this from you on purpose, I tried so hard to erase it from my brain and now, you just brought it up and... Look, I'll do my best. Let me be by your side if they do something or…"

I cut him off.

"What are you talking about? You promised nothing will leave this room unless I want it to."

His eyes went wide. And his grip loosened and slipped down my sweaty palms.

I headed towards the phone and picked it up:

"Kid. Why are you not answering? Where even are you?! I told you that I have a serious problem with…"

"It's Jungkook. Hold on."

"Jungkook…Hi."

"Hi. Namjoon, take the phone."

He was still facing the spot I was in a second ago, now, just the wall.

"Namjoon…Fred says there's a problem." I informed him, feeling like I was about to collapse at any moment.

When he turned around, his face was absolutely, utterly, and incredibly unreadable.

Fingers didn't even graze mine when he took it and went out into the kitchen.

"Hi. Sorry… Who?... Yeah… I'm on my way."

He didn't say goodbye. He didn't even look at me. He just grabbed his jacket and slammed the door on his way out.

And I fell to the ground, ready to release all the tears that I kept inside when the mental image of them beating each other up to a bloody pulp because of me kept redrawing itself inside my mind.

But the anxiety set it and my eyes remained dry. As if I had just done a horrible mistake, I didn't know how to fix it, my body felt shaky and weak. And the thought that I've hurt Namjoon after being honest with me started to burn me alive.

My phone started ringing again, and I half wished it was Namjoon. But when I saw the word 'mom' staring back at me from the screen, I threw the phone to the wall, where Namjoon was just a moment ago.

I curled up on the futon and covered my ears.

But the phone kept on ringing.