Chapter 5

After all the drama that I had experienced with Kent I decided to just live my life relationship free, to go on and study hard, make new friends and live my best life, I mean this was supposed to be one of the best times of my life. You always hear parents say, "my dear, you need to go out and enjoy your stress free life, this is the best times, no bills to pay and no kids". I know that was true but they don't understand how hard it is in high school, the peer pressure that you have to endure just to fit in, all the other high school drama that is included, there isn't even any time for learning. It's just survival of the fittest.

So in my quest to live a better life, here is how my life took another turn.

I enjoyed my time with my friends, I met so many new ones, my best girl friend was Renè, she was fun, so daring and she always pushed me to my limits. She was on the frivolous side, the school slut I would say, she had a new guy every month, and she wasn't afraid to suck faces with each and everyone of them, sucking faces was not the only thing she sicked during school hours, her constant place was the men's toilets in school block c as there never was anyone who used those toilets and everyone knew that when she's going in there she's going in to blow, she was always against my whole Virgin Mary attitude and she tried to push me onto multiple guys, she would always tell me how fun it was to taunt guys and to make them come, she especially liked it when they came in her mouth, to me this was repulsive and I tried to explain how I want to do this with someone I truly love I also explained my issues with trust after my past relationship but she told me to get over it because shit happens and the way we deal with those issues define us as and make us better people, bad relationships also teach us good lessons. She gave good advice and secretly I think she was a good person underneath all of the make up that she used to wear, But being a typical teenager she also got influenced by a lot of people and she became one bad egg. It's just so hard to believe that you can meet a person and you can have a genuinely good time with them but there's simply a problem between your views and morals in life, she is the exact opposite of me, her personality and mines are always opposing, but yet we always have a good time together.

Reese, Ally, Nathalie and Shaun were people that we spent time with. Shaun was Liam's best friend. Liam was ultimately my best friend. Liam was everything to me, he was my confidant, he was my sparring partner, we would playfully insult each other day in and day out, and I think a day without seeing him just made it a horrible day. He was friendly and kind, and he never judged me, he was good academically and he was so great in sports. He wasn't bad looking, actually I think he was quite handsome, not that anyone ever told him that, but I decided against telling him because I didn't want to make it weird between us, I wanted it to stay just the way it was because I never wanted to loose what we had, I never wanted to loose the truest person that I have in my life, the person who always makes me feel safe. He was my best friend and that's who he'll always be, forever, just my best friend, and that was all I had wanted.

Liam and I texted each other every night, I had a curfew, I had to hand in my cell phone at the end of the night by 9pm. That didn't stop me from trying to steal my cell phone back after they went to bed just to chat to my bestie. We had wonderful conversations, he ate my food, he stole my stationary, he insulted me and I insulted him.

I was doing just fine, that's until she came along. This petite little, ohh too chirpy girl walks in, the size of a dwarf, legs that can barely touch the ground when she sits, cute little bouncy pony tail which only suggests that she has hair that falls just on her shoulder when it's opened, she was little and proud and she looked like the type who's bark is worse then her bite, with a name like Viola I knew she was going to be complicated. She was new and it was difficult for her to make friends, I could see she was having a hard time adjusting to Havenside High, so I decided, what the fuck let me try to be a little friendly with her, I mean it couldn't be that bad and I know how hard it is to be the new girl. She actually turned out to be a good person, good morals, good values, I could see she had a mean competitive streak, and she was borderline bipolar, maybe that was just me being over analytical, over judge-mental, I needed to stop thinking that everyone had ulterior motives, not everyone in this world was mean and I needed to chill out.

She slowly started to become friends with my friends and I would even say that she became closer to them then I ever was, I was just happy that she finally had some friends here and I could go back to my usual crowd, my usual crowd being Liam. Honestly speaking I never got on really well with the rest of them, they weren't at all the type of friends that I had hoped for, when I dreamt of having friends it definitely wasn't them, but I had to take what I could get.

Now this is where scumbag number 2 comes along, totally unplanned. Renè had been trying to convince me to date this guy, one of her friends Aaron, he was a year older then me, and a bit short, not shorter then me though, he was just about my height, he was not the schools popular kid, I was even surprised when I saw him because he and I never crossed paths before, and I've been at that school for about a year and a half, he was basically a stranger to me and nothing about him screamed different, he was ordinary with a sly guy look I should have known he was trouble when the only place he would be at was the schools smokers block, now they call it the smokers block for obvious reasons, that's where all the smokers would huddle up and smoke without getting caught. Why would any decent person be trying to break school rules, because they are rebellious that's why. It turns out that he had seen me a few times and started to really like me. I wouldn't say that I'm a Kim Kardashian or a Selena Gomez but I did have some redeeming qualities, I was average when it came to outer appearance, I had a big bum, with boobs that were too big for a high school student, I was tan in complexion and I had eyes that were so big Liam used to call them side plates, from my previous school experience with Kent leaving me for someone better I decided to change my look totally, so I now had my hair shorter, just over my shoulder with side bangs, I wore a black cardigan over my school dress and I was able to create the illusion of a shorter looking dress, later on I eventually started only using the school tracksuit with a tight white shirt which showed too much of my chest, but that I'll explain later on. So now I thought maybe he did like me, the idea of someone actually liking me for the way I look kind of intrigued me, I mean who wouldn't be a little intrigued when someone they haven't had not a single conversation with was suddenly interested in them. All these thoughts and possibilities pass through my head at once, but then I stop to remember how I felt when Kent treated me the way that he did, how I felt let down and hurt, and not to mention embarrassed because I couldn't see infidelity right in front of me. I had drawn up a conclusion, to just follow my original plan and to not get into any other relationships, that was what was best for me, and for a while I stuck to that plan... that's until Aaron started to befriend me, weirdly enough, he was so not ordinary, he had this complex life, he was actually quite entertaining. He was never forward with me, he never asked for anything from me but friendship, and that's exactly what I wanted from him, he was something new and I enjoyed having something new. When I spoke to Liam about Aaron he was totally against him, he wouldn't even meet Aaron or have a simple conversation let alone greet Aaron when he saw him in the mornings, and all I wanted was for my best friend to become friends with my new friend, but I knew that wasn't going to happen. Liam knew something about Aaron that he didn't want to tell me and that's why he never liked Aaron, I begged and begged him to tell me what it was but he never budged, he told me that it was just intuition and he didn't know anything about Aaron, he simply didn't like him. I had no choice but to believe him, but I wasn't going to stop being friends with Aaron just because of Liams "intuition", I had told him that if he couldn't give me a good enough reason to stop being friends with Aaron then I was just not going to stop. I'm a strong believer of chances, I give chances and I always gave people chances, maybe it was time I started to give the right people chances.

As time went on I started to spend more time with Aaron, actually he started demanding more time with me, I love when someone knows what they want and they go out and get it, that was Aaron, he knew what he wanted and he always tried his best to get what he wanted. He would get me flowers for no reason at all, he would buy me chocolates everyday, he never had a car but he started to walk me home, even though he lived on the opposite side of where I lived, he started to become the perfect gentleman, I think that's when I started to like him a little, but just a little.

Things between Liam and I was also great, we would have such wonderful conversations and he would make me laugh for hours and hours, but my time could only be spread so thinly, I had to worry about school, and I had Liam and I now also had Aaron, and Renè and I became closer, we even started hanging out on the weekends, we would have sleepovers and go to shopping malls together, all of this suddenly became so overwhelming, from being a total loner to having all these different relationships now, this was immensely draining, I had to do something, that's when I think the stupidest idea that I ever had in my life popped up, at that time it seemed right, it seemed like the only way to spread my time. This was my idea, single Liam meets single Viola, what could go wrong, I mean the two were complete opposites, but both were single and a little fling wouldn't hurt anyone. Lights, camera and action, my plan was set, and I would be doing whatever it took to get these two together. Now it was time for me to play Cupid, and now I think that was totally stupid of me.

Liam knew I had a soft spot for his arms and shoulders, they were the broadest shoulders I had ever seen, just something about his arms around me always made me feel warm and safe, off course I never told him that because again why would I want to make it weird between us, I just kept that part to myself, all he needed to know was that I liked the size of his arms. He always flexed them and sent me pictures, I would laugh at him the next day when I got to school, I would mock him and tell him to get a girlfriend so he could send her nude pictures of himself and not me, I had told him that I was tired of seeing his naked body, he would always reply back with "I'm not naked in those pictures, I still have pants on", but in my mind I had weirdly hoped he wouldn't stop sending me those pictures. Whenever I received a picture from him I would ogle over it for maybe an hour or two and I think my heart would even flutter a little when I saw his shoulders in person because I'd just imagine him with only his grey joggers on like in the pictures and no shirt on with those broad dark shoulders and big arms just draped over me consuming me totally, sometimes I had to stop myself and stop my thoughts because they were becoming too repulsive even for me, and I needed to stop sexualising my best friend, it was wrong and I didn't like him in that way, not at all, so now I decided that I would pick a picture, a suitable one, something not too spicy because I didn't want to send my best eye candy to her just a mild one to tantalise her taste buds, being Viola she naturally replied back seemingly uninterested, but I was determined to show her what's under those covers, and eventually she was amazed at what an amazing body lay hidden, and I think that picture just made her one hundred times more interested in Liam then she already was, so I sent her his number and from there they started chatting, and before I even knew it, I had lost my best friend. When I think about it now all of the drama in the next 3 years of my life revolves around this, and I was the one who caused it.