chapter 35

Oh, my God. Colin's here.

How long had he been here? Was he staying permanently? And, more importantly,

had he come here for her?

Oh, God. Oh, God.

Julia's mind was all over the place. What if he really had come all the way out here

for her? What did it mean? What should she do? Why hadn't anyone told her?

And then, another thought struck her: What if the reason no one had told her was

that his move here had nothing to do with her? What if it was just Delaney's business?

What if she hadn't entered into his decision at all? What if she called him, and he didn't

want to hear from her?

"Oh, crap," she said, looking at her computer screen. "Crap. Crap."

The biggest part of her wanted to feel joy, hope, jubilation at the thought that he'd

come here to try again with her, to reclaim what they'd had so briefly and turn it into

more. But another part of her was afraid to hope it was true. What if she was

misinterpreting his move? It was one thing to walk away from a man she'd been falling in

love with for the sake of her brother. But it was something else entirely to have hopes and

feelings, only to have the rug pulled out from beneath her.

Kind of like the way I pulled the rug out from under Colin when I chose Drew over

him.

She felt the sting of guilt at the memory. She'd told herself at the time that she

wasn't really hurting him because they'd known each other so briefly. But the truth was,

she knew that was a lie. A brief time or not, there had been something between them,

some kind of chemistry, some kind of magic. That didn't happen every day. In fact, in

some fifteen years of dating, it had never happened to Julia before.

And she'd run like hell from it.

That wasn't just about Drew, and she knew it. She was scared then, and she was

scared now. What if he really had just chased her more than a thousand miles?

Right now, she wanted nothing more than to let him catch her.

Colin was disgusted with himself. He'd uprooted himself, coming 1,300 miles just to

try to get back together with Julia. And he hadn't been able to drum up the courage to

even talk to her yet.

The problem, he told himself, was that he hadn't come up with a good strategy.

Should he call her? Show up at her house? Text? E-mail? Have flowers been delivered?

And when he did one of those things, what would he say?

I know you said you didn't want to have anything to do with me, but I moved out

here to be near you, so how about it? What part of that didn't sound like stalking?

Should he throw himself at her feet and beg her to be with him? Or arrange to

casually run into her one day? Should he ask Breanna or Gen to mention to Julia in an offhand

way that he was here and then see if she made a move?

This was stupid. He was being stupid.

He could make this kind of move in the hopes of winning a woman's heart, but he

couldn't even bring himself to talk to her.

"Man up," he told himself. "For God's sake."

The day he finally decided to make his move, the weather was sunny and clear, and

the sky was so starkly blue it almost didn't seem real. It seemed like some optimistic

child's painting of a sky; he almost expected to see a big smiley face in the sun.

Colin set out in his Mercedes in midafternoon, thinking to complete the two-hour

drive just as Julia was getting home from work. If she wasn't home yet when he got

there, then by God, he'd wait for her. If he didn't see her today, there was no telling when

he'd muster up the courage to try again.

He spent the lengthy drive grumbling and brooding. The closer he got to her house,

the more he was prepared for her to kick him out on his ass. And the more he thought

about that very real possibility, the angrier it made him.

He was Colin goddamned Delaney. He was one of the wealthiest men in the state of

California. He'd graduated from fucking Harvard Law. He was smart and accomplished,

and women had been known to think he was attractive. If she couldn't or wouldn't accept

what he had to give, then it was her mistake; it would be her damned loss.

Just when he'd worked up a good head of steam, he'd lose it again thinking of how

much he wanted her. He wanted her more than he wanted anything, more than he wanted

to keep standing upright and keep breathing in and out. And that was the truth of it, not

some false confidence he was trying to make himself feel.

By the time he parked the Mercedes in front of her house, he had worked himself up

into such a state that there was a good chance he might throw up on his shoes the moment

she opened the door.

He steadied himself and went up the front walk anyway. Her car was in the

driveway, and a light shone from inside the house. He stood on her front porch, took a

deep breath, closed his eyes, and exhaled slowly. Then he rang the bell.

The curtain beside the front door moved slightly, and he saw her face, saw her eyes

widen. Then the door was opening and she was standing there in front of him, like a

vision from his dreams.

Sweatpants, tank top, bare feet. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, loose

tendrils trailing down into her face. She wasn't wearing makeup. Of course, she wouldn't

be; she'd probably been working in the dirt all day, in the sun and the dust, planting

things, making things grow.

She had never looked more beautiful to him than she did right now. He opened his

mouth to say something—some rational thing about relationships and families and

brothers—but instead, he took one step forward and pulled her into his arms so suddenly

that she gasped in surprise. Then he kissed her with everything he had, everything he'd

been feeling. He claimed her mouth with his own, and he felt her go limp and weak in his

arms. She felt like promise and hope. She felt like his future.

After a moment, and with some difficulty, he let go of her and pushed her gently

away from him. She brought a hand to her mouth, her fingertips touching her lips. The

taste of those lips was still on Colin's tongue.

"I'm living here now. In Billings," he said.

She nodded.

"You didn't want me before. But I hope you will now." He took a deep breath,

cleared his throat, and nodded at her. "Ball's in your court."

Then he walked back to his car, got in, and drove back to Billings.

The kiss left Julia so stunned and speechless that she didn't move, didn't go inside, didn't

even close the door for several minutes after Colin was gone. Her heart was pounding,

her knees were weak, and she seemed to have lost the power of coherent thought. Parts of

her body that had been sorely neglected lately felt like they were about to burst into

flames.

The ball's in your court.

When she finally went inside and closed the door, she sat on the edge of her sofa in a

daze and thought about what, exactly, it meant for the ball to be in her court. The last

time the ball had been in her court, she'd dropped it. She'd rejected him even though he'd

done nothing to deserve it, even though he was nothing short of her dream man. What

was wrong with her? What had she been thinking?

She had blown what was perhaps the greatest opportunity of her life for the sake of a

the brother who insisted on sabotaging his own life, who couldn't see beyond his own

determination to be wronged, joyless, inconsolable.

And now, Colin was giving her that opportunity again. He was handsome, not to

mention filthy rich; he could have had any woman in the world. And yet he wanted her so

much that he'd moved halfway across the country for her. What had she done to deserve

that? What had she done, other than hurt him?

This time, she decided she was going to smash that ball back over the net or die

trying.

She gave Colin enough time to get back to the ranch, and then texted him.

We need to talk. There are some important things I have to say to you.

He didn't answer for a long time. When he did, the response was businesslike, and

not quite what she'd expected.

I have some time next Friday. I'll be out of town all day. Should be home around

six. Drive out, and we'll talk.

Next Friday? Julia blinked, feeling stung. After he'd come all the way out here, after

that kiss, he couldn't spare time for her until next Friday? And he wanted her to come to

Billings, two hours away. What did that mean? Was he testing her? Was he creating

hoops for her to jump through to find out whether she was serious?

Well, if she had to jump through hoops to get Colin, she'd do it.

She'd do it even if the damned things were on fire.

Julia spent some time thinking and formulating a plan. Then she called Breanna to

run an idea past her.

By the end of the day, she had a tentative scheme in place. But she couldn't pull it

off alone; she needed help.

She called Mike and explained what she had in mind.

"Couldn't you just buy him some flowers and a damned box of candy?" he

grumbled.

"Does that mean you won't help?" she asked.

"I'll help," he said grudgingly. "If only to get you to shut up about your love life."

Colin hadn't put Julia off until next Friday to make her jump through hoops, or to

test her, or anything as premeditated as that. He'd done it because the wording of her text

—We need to talk—was universal woman-speak for I'm about to crush your heart, and if

you kiss me again I'll seriously consider a restraining order.