Broken heart

"Like hell, I will stop. Can't you see they are disrespecting you? How can you bear it?" She gritted her teeth.

Feng Ye Isey increased his hold on her as he pressed her against the ground. "It's not like I am numb to their provocation, but I tend to ignore it. There is nothing I can do to them if I am powerless. I need power and status so subdue them. And you very well know how powerful I am. The only thing I can do, for now, is to just accept all the insults" He said slowly.

He noticed pity in Qin Ru's eyes which made him uncomfortable.

He thought he was immune to all the insult and sympathy he was subjected to, but for some odd reason, he couldn't stomach pity from her.

He was upset.

After being hurt by her glare, he added, "However, I will serve all the insults to them tenfolds later."

Qin Ru was stunned when he heard him but after hearing him, she smiled genuinely. "I believe in you Feng Ye Isey."

Now it was Ye Isey's turn to be stunned.

She believed him.

Just like that...

Only he knows how much he wished for people to believe in him but except for his mother, no one ever believed him.

Nor emperor, nor officials, nor his love.

In his heart, he ridiculed his so-called love.

However, a complete stranger who had only known him for a few hours was willing to believe in him. Assist him. Feng Ye Isey would be lying if he said he wasn't moved. He was, but he kept his heart in check.

Love was painful and he experienced it firsthand.

This heartbreak is grief that comes in waves, grueling, stealing appetite and sleep alike. It is a shard in his guts that never leaves, though perhaps in time the edges will dull. It feels like death is just the same as bereavement and in quiet moments choking the breath from his body. What was once whole is shattered; where once was peace is emptiness, echoes of love He put his everything into. With each passing day, he takes another step away though he asked her to show some sign of caring, affection, or love.

His only 'crime' was to not be able to cope with her expectations, with the words he allowed to spill unchecked. He has always done his best for her and, even now, still does. Inadequate as she finds him, this was his best, it is all that is left of a once proud and strong soul - fragments on the floor scared that the next wind will blow them away.

Since her love turned to poison, his mind cycles through emotions faster than a kid flipping toys. He has gone from level to rocky - fighting a mixture of competing emotions, each of them vying for dominance. After several sleepless nights, he is now calm, the day stretching ahead with possibilities - time to get jobs done, connect with friends, enjoy nature. Yet this coping is a thin veil over trauma and even the smallest of setbacks change his emotional landscape. By evening the sadness wells up, uncertainty rushing to the fore, and he knows it is time to sleep. How the crazy dreams stitch his head back together he is clueless, it is a new miracle every night.

This heartbreak feels cold.

It feels like concrete drying in his chest. It was unexpected, as they always are - top of the world one minute and cut down the next. Why is that? Is there part of her that dislikes seeing him happy or is he that miserable? She does know it is her, he was trying to help, right? It is her, he worked so hard for? Perhaps this is her way of returning to the feelings, her chance to dwell in pain and pessimism once more. Yet he can't live there, can't dwell there. There are only so many times she can break his heart - one day it will heal all wrong, heal with you on the outside.

Heartache is a true condition that has been medically proven. When a heart is completely broken, it takes time for the body and mind to heal. There are no miracle medications or salves for the heart, only the healing that comes from peaceful surroundings, time, and the love of others.

"If something was meant to be, it is. If not, it was not. Why pine for the illusions of the past? Love is a drug. Live free & happy!" Qin Ru whispered slowly.

She was aware of Ye Isey's gaze. In her previous life, she has seen him gazing at nothingness numerous times. Every time he was dazed, it was because he was longing.

Longing for his unrequited love.

It pained her to see him in this condition but there was nothing she could do to help him out.

It was misery that he chose for himself.

Hopeless, desperate, and despondent, you can pretty much sum up heartbreaks with these three worse emotional pains you will live through in life. It is absolutely traumatizing. But ultimately, if you can compose yourself and remain calm and confident through all this, there is a greater good that you can achieve.

After all, nothing kindles our fire and awakens us to the reality of life so much as unrequited true love does.

Feng Ye Isey was stunned.