Regrets and Regards

The next morning was just like any other morning-- Alexandria woke Maria up by pulling the curtains back and letting the light flood her room before she got her bathed and dressed for the day.

Before Alexandria left the room, Maria gave her Arthur's invitation to deliver for their boat ride date tomorrow afternoon.

Maria wore a formal toga and sandals, but had planned to change into trousers and a blouse after she and Leonardo arrived at the training room for their fencing date.

She felt at ease going into her date because she still was holding onto the confidence that Henri had instilled in her the night before.

Once again, she was finding herself to be grateful for the kind prince.

When she made it to Leonardo's door, she knocked and waited for him to answer.

She waited and waited, but there was no answer.

Frowning in confusion, she walked over to the training room by herself because if he had gone to her room, they would have passed each other in the hall, so there was nowhere else he would have been.

He would have been able to find the training room without her because it happened to be down the same hall as the dining room that he went to on a daily basis; all of the men had to pass it on their way to eat.

She could have sworn the invitation said she would meet him at his room, but maybe he was nervous and forgot, or maybe he just wanted to practice before she arrived, Maria thought to herself.

She entered the large room that was filled with weighted bean bags and swords and various sports equipment, but she did not see Leonardo anywhere.

"How strange," she whispered to herself, wondering what happened to him.

Was he using the bathroom? Was he eating? Did he forget about their date?

A million thoughts raced through her mind and she had an uneasy feeling in her stomach that she tried to fight.

She decided to sit down on one of the benches, unsure of what else to do, and she waited.

After a couple of minutes, she realized that she had too much nervous energy to sit, so she stood up right as the loyal guard, George, entered the room.

He had a somber look on his face as he said, "My Lady," and bowed before he handed Maria a piece of parchment.

"Thank you, George. Is this from Leonardo?," she asked as she unfolded it quickly, curious to see what was written.

"Yes, my Lady," he said with a pained look on his face that Maria missed because she was focused on the paper.

He left the room so that she could have privacy while she read what the prince had to say to her.

She finally got the parchment open, and began to read Leonardo's hand-written note.

"Maria, I regret to inform you that I have made the decision to leave as I cannot see myself as your husband. I am looking for a delicate wife who will provide me with a warm home, and I do not think you could fit into that role. You are not as lady-like as I would have hoped you to be, and you lack the grace of other princesses that I have met. You constantly arrive places late and will leave without so much as a goodbye. Furthermore, I do not want a wife who will challenge me, I want one who is obedient and will serve me well. You, obviously, would not. I hope you are able to find a man to put up with you, because men who are willing to deal with a woman like you are few and far in between. Regards, Leo".

Maria felt tears prick at her eyes, and she read the letter again and again, until her eyes blurred over, so that she could make sure that she fully understood.

Maria had always been insecure in herself, thinking that she would never be enough for her country, and Leonardo had planted a seed that played at her worst fear.

He left because even the thought of one date was too unbearable for him, and he was not even willing to try to get to know her first.

Maria felt mortified.

Of course she had been afraid that she may not like some of the men, but the fact that some of the men might not be satisfied with her was something that had not really crossed her mind until now.

What if at the end of all of this she actually fell in love with someone who did not want her in return?

Her brain had unlocked a new fear, and Maria finally felt the tears roll down her face as she sat back down on the bench.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even hear when someone had entered the room.

"Maria?" she heard a man call out, and she turned to face the voice that snapped her out of her line of thinking.

It was Arthur, and he approached her at a slow pace as he studied her face in order to gauge her current state.

Maria's face was red and wet with tears, but at that moment, she couldn't care less what she looked like.

She watched as he approached her, concern written all over his face, before she asked him with a remote voice, "Why are you here?"

"I saw Leonardo leave his room with servants holding his bags, which I thought was strange because he was supposed to be here with you, wasn't he?"

Maria felt more tears start to form and she had no desire to speak, so she just returned her face forward as more tears fell.

Arthur sat on the bench and faced her, waiting.

Without turning towards him to explain, she stretched out her hand to give him the parchment to read for himself.

He hesitated for a moment before he took it and read over what Leonardo wrote.

She heard him stand up and start to pace as he let out a long breath after he finished reading it. "Do you want me to kill him? Because I will kill him for making you cry like this," he said, his voice full of spite and malice.

"You made me cry the other day too, remember? Should we kill you too?" she asked, her face still forward and voice still flat.

He let out a soft, awkward chuckle and sat down so he could take her hand that was next to him to hold onto it. He brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed it before he said, "You can do whatever you want to me, my dear. But, for what it's worth, I'm sorry that you found me so irresistible that you cried from how overwhelming it was for you".

That pulled Maria out of her funk, and she turned to glare at him as she said, "That's not--" but her words got trapped in her throat when he reached up with his free hand to wipe the tears from her face with his fingers.

Arthur gently wiped one side of her face before he wiped the other, and Maria just stared at him, suddenly feeling vulnerable.

After he dried her face, he leaned forward and kissed under both of her eyes, where the trials of tears had just been moments before.

Maria closed her eyes and let out a soft cry. The gesture had been so caring and sweet, that it made her think her tears would fall all over again.

This man sitting at her side was usually so self-seeking and insensitive, and this was the second time that he had taken care of her when she cried and needed it.

Overwhelmed and vulnerable, she pulled her hand from his, and wrapped her arms around his neck so that she could bury her face on the side of his face in order to hug him.

She held onto him as if he was an anchor keeping her from drifting away, and he wrapped one of his arms around her waist as the other held the back of her head to stroke her hair.

Her body started to shake slightly as if she was having a mild panic attack, so he swooped her up in one easy motion and placed her across his lap in order to hold her small body tighter to him.

"I'm here, it's going to be fine," he said over and over to her as he stroked her head, until her body slowly relaxed against him.

He rocked her slightly to calm her, and they both became silent until Maria suddenly whispered to herself but loud enough for Arthur to hear, "What if I'm not good enough?"