Chapter 9: The Confession

Yuki unconsciously gazed at Ryohei for a few seconds before asked, "Do you like me, Ryohei?"

Ryohei gasped at Yuki's honesty. He immediately broke the hug. His blushing face got redder and he was restless to stay still. His feet urged him to run away, but at the same time his hand was still holding Yuki's.

"I- I-" Ryohei stammered, even hid incoherent voice messed his usual calmness. "I probably like you, but I don't really like you."

A laugh burst from Yuki. The embarrassment Ryohei endured caused him to turn his back towards Yuki. He was just lucky because Yuki was blind, which meant whatever kind of expression he made was unnoticeable to Yuki. Even so, he disliked exposing himself too freely because he was not the pretentious type, so any kind of emotion would display in his speaking instead.

"You're very transparent, Ryohei," Yuki wiped the escaping tears from his eye tips. "I could read you without Braille, see."

No matter how much Ryohei denied it, Yuki would still win the debate. Ryohei was really the naive one despite being so judgmental towards other people. Ryohei was fully aware of his bad trait, hence he opted to be alone most of the time. He disliked hurting other people with his words.

"I'm sorry," Ryohei apologized to neutralize the whole situation. He eventually faced Yuki again. "I don't mean to hurt you or your feeling. I wonder if you know, but I am friendless. I easily judge people, so I don't want my friend to get offended by my words. However, I am super comfortable with you. I feel the chemistry between us, but I've been too blunt in our first meeting. I hesitated to keep on talking to you, but you were so kind. Even up till today, you are so considering."

Yuki's eye smile soothed Ryohei's pounding heart.

"So what do you mean by 'you like me, but you don't really like me'?" Yuki sounded as if he was testing on Ryohei's bluntness. He even smirked.

Ryohei evaded from meeting eyes with Yuki as hard as he could. Even a blind man could read him. "I like being around you, but I don't like you romantically."

"Of course you are," Yuki chuckled at Ryohei. He could imagine Ryohei being shy and restless. "You like girls, right? Of course you won't like me romantically."

"I don't mean to say you're not pretty though," Ryohei quickly insisted, "You're pretty, even if you're to be compared to a girl. You're open minded although you can't see. You are independent, and I must say you're strong willed. I'm adoring your courage."

Yuki has ceased from laughing, but blinking in puzzlement. "I'm not that courageous though," Yuki lowered his head in attempt of veiling his expression.

However, Yuki's voice was shaking. Ryohei was truly heartless if he did not realize the sudden change in Yuki's intonation.

"My dark past has almost transformed me to a very malicious person. I cursed a lot, I got drunk. I hit on men because of my job, and I dressed up really sexy. Plus, my special trait, as you know what it is, was really helping me seducing more men. I was the real golden asset of my recruiter. Almost everyone loved me.

"Nevertheless, I knew all of them were using me to fulfill their sexual lust. They figured out I wouldn't get pregnant no matter how much they cummed inside me. It gave them the best sensation. These eyes," Yuki pointed at his eyes, "are the eyes that I'm so proud of for now."

Crystal cleared tears rolled down his cheeks while revealing his enclosed feeling all these while. Ryohei was heart wrenched listening to Yuki's disclosure and seeing the blind's tearing down miserably.

"If it wasn't because of these eyes, I might still get astray. I might still sell myself, and spread my legs to any men. I thank a lot to these eyes."

"Yuki, Yuki," Ryohei interjected as he saw Yuki's body was bowing. No, Yuki was not actually bowing. He was about to crouch after being able to vent his heart out. "Yuki-kun."

At last, Yuki lifted up his head. His wet eyes met Ryohei, enhanced the devastation Ryohei sensed since Yuki cried.

"When you said you are cosy being with me, I couldn't feel happier than that. Yet at the same time, I was so afraid that you would really harm me."

"Yuki-kun."

"Please, Ryohei."

"Yuki-kun."

"Help me from this sullen feeling. Free me from this cage. Bring me out of my nasty world."

"Yuki-kun."

That was it. Ryohei could not bear to listen anymore. The truth was unbearably painful. It disheartened him that Yuki was still haunted by massive guilt from being a male prostitute. Once again, he swept Yuki into his embrace. He shushed him while patting his head gently, murmuring soothing words into his ear. The shivering Yuki has not calmed down, but instead of bawling his eyes out, he sobbed quietly. His hand clenched on Ryohei's shirts, really firmly as if he was not letting him go.

"I- I-" In a short time, Yuki has already hiccuped. He buried his face into Ryohei's chest, wetting the latter's shirt. "I want to be helped. Take me out of that world. It was so frightening."

Ryohei tightened his embrace. This time, not only that he felt their beating hearts collided against each other. He could feel the sorrow Yuki has endured possibly for years. The kind of negative emotion that has engulfed Yuki's innocence all these while... was penetrating into Ryohei. It was miraculously transferred to the opposite party pretty well, and Yuki was utterly grateful that the other party staying with him at the moment was Ryohei.

"I will help you, Yuki-kun," Ryohei, too, did not seem to give in. He rubbed Yuki's back with one hand, and his other hand ruffled through Yuki's hair.

While sniffling, Yuki nodded. A pact has formed between them. Only Ryohei and Yuki were aware of it. Only they could change it as well.

"You may come to me whenever you overthink. Please reach me when you are feeling down, and please take care of your health," Ryohei advised Yuki while still cuddling him. "I will take care of you. I will be by your side. I will support you whenever you need me to do so," he broke the hug and gently pushed Yuki's face to confront him.

The height difference forced Ryohei to lift Yuki's head higher. Yuki's shimmering eyes due to too much crying really wrecked his heart. He hated to see Yuki cried - the aftereffect was really troublesome. Yuki's expression was undeniably unforgettable.

"If you want to live with me, just tell me. I will prepare a room for you."