Chapter VI: The Apartment

The place began to change as the mist went away. The place that greeted their arrival was a big building with a lot of sub-sections. Yes, it was a modern apartment. It looks exactly like his old apartment that he was living in for six years.

"I thought that was all from my dream? No, my current life. Then why did this appear here?" He said in disbelief. As he was busy looking at the apartment on how similar it is, the maid let go of his hand and walked towards the apartment. He followed her.

He first looked at the room where his landlord used to stay at. He opened the door and saw that there was no one inside. Not even a furniture, just an empty room. He decided to go to the other rooms but when he tried to open the door on the first one, it won't open.

He tried the next one and the one after that but no door opened. He had tried every room on the first floor but no room wanted to budge. He went to the 2nd floor and saw an opened room on the farthest side. He walked inside and saw that the maid was there.

He went inside the room and was shocked by what he saw. Every detail was exactly the same as the apartment that he used to stay at. It felt and seems just like yesterday. Just like the one in his so-called dream back in the misty place, it's as accurate as his memories recalled it.

Before thinking of anything else, he saw that the maid went to his small kitchen and grabbed a water heater. The maid poured the hot water on what it seems to be a cup of noodles. He was surprised that the materials for that were already there, just like back in the first place that they went to. Only this time, it was all premade.

Yes, he recalled it. Such an unhealthy diet. This was all he would eat back then when he was in college. Even then when he was working, this was his go-to food because it was easy and no hassle to make.

The maid then brought the cup of noodles to the small table in the living room. She sat on the chair and stared at him. He instinctively sat on the sofa and waited for the cup of noodles to be ready for a minute. After the noodles got ready, he picked them up and blew the hot air that is created.

The smell and aroma of the noodles made him remember the hardships that he spent back when he was still staying in this apartment. He took a sip of the broth. It tasted just like every other cup of noodles that he ate. The taste of having food just to satisfy your hunger. It was dull and yet, it was good. He proceeded to eat it all.

He began to tell a story starting with him saying that, "You know, I always did my best back then. Even though to be honest, I really did not know where I was going or why am I even trying. I was always aiming for high grades. Crazy, right? I focused too much on my studies that I barely got to actually have fun. The only person I hanged out with was my best friend."

He put the empty cup of noodles on the table and leaned back on the sofa. "I didn't know when did it all changed. Back in high school I always had good grades as well but it didn't seem that I strived for it. I had fun back then. I do not know but the pressure suddenly started when I went to college. It was like I was forced into this situation and I went along with it. My parents, the people around me, my peers, and people whom I want to please. I know they mean well since school is still a way for a future. But in the process of doing it, it just felt like a daily routine, a chore that continued to torture me day by day. Even so, I persevered and managed to get out of that cycle. I just thought back then that it was meant to glorify or preserve a tradition. A part of life to pleases people, especially the parents whom I had such a big debt on."

He paused for a while and looked at the maid, just like always, she had no response whatsoever. He continued with his story. "After I got out of that place, that over-exalted abode for so-called learning, I began to feel free. I felt that it was over and that I didn't have to force myself into submission anymore. But after that, another struggle began. Although I easily got a job with my remarks and a great display of my facade, I can't help to think if this is really what I wanted with my life. Again, everything was repeated. Although this time, it was more of a robotic action with no life. What is a good purpose to live anyway? Should I just strive and let it flow? Who gets to decide our purpose, is it us or someone else? I began to question myself about those stuff after repeating such bland scenes of life. Maybe I need a hobby? Maybe I need someone in my life? Maybe I should just accept that this is all there is to life? Whether you make something out of it or not, we are all confined within the reaches of our limited understanding of anything." He said in an unlively descending tone.

He looked again at the maid that was staring at him. He smiled and said, "Although I said all that, there are still people whom I wanted to strive for. My family, I guess and maybe my sister. I know I said that I had no purpose but I also wasn't sure if struggling for someone else could be considered a purpose. I haven't seen them in a while now you see but I'm pretty sure that I want to see their smiling faces. Even then, it just felt that something was missing. Although it fuelled me day by day, it just felt kind of off. It was like no matter how much I asked myself, confirm myself or even see myself knowing that this was enough to be happy, I wasn't contented in the least. There is always this void, a hole that cannot be filled with anything. This is probably the curse that was brought to us humans. That's what I called it. I cursed that we are aware of our existence. Always seeking something but we do not know what. Who am I? Where am I going? Where did I come from?" He ended his story with those questions.

After his storytelling ending with a long silence, the maid stood up and picked the cup of noodles. He, on the other hand, went to his room. After seeing the room that looked exactly like his, he picked up some books. Books from college, books for casual reading, books from work, and a scrapbook of his pictures with his family. He spent the whole day inside that room making himself busy.

After a long while, he went into the living room and saw that the maid was lying on the sofa and was sleeping. He got a blanket from his room and put it over her body. He opened the door of that apartment room and saw that the sky was again dark. He went outside and just gazed at the beautiful night sky.

After a while, he came back inside but saw that the maid was no longer on the sofa. He looked in the kitchen and saw that the maid was holding something in her hand. To his surprise, it was a can of alcoholic beverage. He thought about the time when he first had one and never had it before. He also remembered back in the dream back in that misty place that he also had one before waking up.

The maid went back into the living room and put the beverage on the small table. She again sat at the chair and stared at him. He saw this as a sign that the maid wanted him to drink it so he sat on the sofa.

He began drinking it and slowly he also began to lose his keen sense of awareness and was moving his body side to side.

He was sloppy with his movements and began to talk about some stuff. "Why can't I seem to be contented with life? You said to strive for something to make myself sane. I guess anything will go, right? This feeling, I want it to go away! I also want to feel a sense of accomplishment. I know I'm not the only person feeling something like this. Is it really that easy to keep yourself sane and find the purpose you are looking for? Am I really just that bad at living this life? I know I'm looking for something but I do not know. Just the thought of it is scary. The closer I get, the more that I might know but the more that I might know, it might break me even more." He said all these intensely in the long interval before falling asleep.

As his eyes were closing in on him, he faintly saw the maid moving towards him with the blanket that he got for her earlier. After that, his eyes closed and he fell asleep.

He suddenly woke up as if grasping for something in a nightmare. After waking up, he saw that he was lying on the floor with a blanket and a pillow. He then remembered what had happened yesterday. He knew that he easily got drunk and passed out.

He got up and looked around to see where the maid was but she was nowhere to be found inside the apartment room. He went outside and as he opened the door, the bright morning sky greeted him. After avoiding eye contact with the sky and looking down, he saw the maid outside the apartment below.

He hurriedly went down to go there. After arriving there, the maid looked at him, and then she turned back. She then began to walk again towards a new path. "So this is all for this place, I guess." He said as he followed the maid.