Anything to Ease His Boredom

Ladislas rang the bell and waited for the door to open. He was faced with the dumbfounded expression of his servant, Penelope when it did.

"Master, did you buy something?" she asked, glancing at the shopping bag in his head.

"Yeah, I was walking back from the University and felt like shopping," he said in an easy voice.

"You're going to go out and climb rocks?" Penelope was staring at him as though he'd just turned into a ten-year-old boy in front of her very eyes. Ladislas nodded at her, trying to make himself sure of it.

"Rocks?" she said again, her voice stained with disbelief.

"When you say it like that… it sounds stupid." He sighed and flopped onto the couch, shopping bag discarded at his feet. The momentary high he'd gotten from the new spark of interest was fading fast and he was starting to see what the entire thing must seem to others.

Ridiculous.

He wasn't the athletic type. His body was, by nature, lithe and predatory. He didn't need exercise to maintain it. But he had laid around the house under the sun with a book and a glass of whiskey for years. He'd also traveled the world, eaten most cuisines available (hated a lot of them), and done almost everything possible under the sun.

He even planted his yard with violets and poppies in an attempt to spend his time under the influence of fumes.

He was bored, okay?

He didn't know what possessed him to prance into the outdoor gear store and buy himself a pair of shoes for a sport that he had absolutely no experience in. It might have something to do with the muscular, sweating woman hanging from her fingertips on the big blown-up poster outside the store. Might have been how the air smelled that day or the restless feeling that had settled heavily in his ribcage.

He thought, 'What the fuck, it's not as if I will die if I fall from the mountain or anything.' So, why the fuck not.

He was feeling bored and had been flailing aimlessly for months, looking for something new to occupy himself with. While he'd come up with a number of colorful ideas and acted on all of them, nothing seemed to satisfy the itch.

"For fun?" Penelope pressed, still not believing a word he said. Her idea of fun was going to a bar, ordering an expensive platter of cheese, and drinking herself silly enough to believe she was in some other country or era.

Humans.

Penelope even wore adult-tutus and was regularly sprinkled in a fine shimmer of sparkly makeup. Ladislas had joined her a couple of times, but he didn't like the look of himself in the mirror, so he stopped accompanying her.

For a servant who worked for him, this Penelope was living an easy life.

"For exercise. And for fun, I guess," he retorted, grumbling a little because he really had no idea what he was going to do with it.

Penelope sat next to him and pulled the shoebox from the plastic bag, rustling through the tissue paper and gasping.

"Master, those are the ugliest damn shoes I have ever seen," she scoffed, picking one out of the tissue paper and examining it as though it was an alien insect. She held it in the tips of her fingers in case they stung her. Coming from her, this was the understatement of the century, considering the sky-high heels she sported that looked like medieval torture devices.

And yes, he knew how they looked. Very fascinating things. He had fun in those years. Their idea of entertainment was fascinating.

"The guy at the store said they were the best." Ladislas eyed the insect-alien, trying to find some beauty in it, but Penelope was right. It was ugly. Curved in on itself like some weird thing and he couldn't actually believe that the guy wanted him to fit his foot in there.

He assured Ladislas that they were meant to cut off circulation to his feet like that and it would make sense when he was out there on the rocks.

Additionally, the guy had looked worried for him. Well, his worries were misplaced. Nothing was hurting his fine body.

Penelope threw the shoe back into the box and sighed. "Master, can I interest you in accompanying me to the club?"

Ladislas groaned. "To see the humans grind and sweat against one another? Wish I could be like them." Less bored.

"Well, we do enjoy ourselves. You might even come across someone new to corrupt," she enticed with a gleam in her eyes. Ladislas took the bait.

"I suppose." He got up from his perch and sauntered to his room to find something to wear. Well, black it was.

The club was usual. The smell of sweat was evident and the men and women ground against one another, waiting to catch their next prey and fuck their night away. He even saw some horny college students humping in the darkest corners.

Fascinating.

He finally felt his bladder protest, the gallons of alcohol finally doing a number on his body, and slowly walked to the washroom.

The perks of being a human male was not waiting in line to pee. He didn't mind that the men aired their junk to the air while doing so. He could appreciate a good cock if he saw one.

He whipped out his dick and started his business when he heard the stall behind him open. He was about to hum to himself when he heard a female voice.

Ladislas turned to the courageous woman and felt a round of chuckles get stuck in his throat. Short black hair that looked un-styled from running her hand through, a habit that seemed to be subconscious. The bodysuit she wore was see-through and her little bralette was evident under the mesh. The metal-studded pants were the highlight, though. Especially because her hand was placed over her crotch, the zipper undone.

The uninhibited horror on her face and the gaping expression as her eyes shifted from his package to his face was amusing, to say the least. He wanted to tease her, but he feared she would faint from embarrassment.

"I have never been in this position before, so I don't know how to react," he said, stifling his salacious smile. "I acknowledge your appreciation of my package, though." He tilted his head to the side to inspect her. He could see the polka dots on her underwear from between her splayed fingers. What a contradiction.

"Uh… hi. That's some… juicy looking…" she shook her head to clear it. "I'll just…" She scrambled towards the exit, a little too slow for someone who truly wanted to escape.

Finally, Ladislas burst into laughter.

This was the most interesting thing that had happened to him in years. Maybe he should be walking into the women's bathroom for some entertainment. Maybe being called a pervert or beaten by human females was what he needed to have fun.

He went back to the little booth Penelope had booked and found her surrounded by twenty-something-year-old boys.

"I think I will walk into women's restrooms," he announced when he entered. The men turned in shock, not expecting those words.

Penelope looked up, as well. "Master, the police will get involved," she warned, knowing nothing could really talk him out of it.

Ladislas shrugged. "Well, I could go through a trial or two. Courtroom intrigues look interesting. Or I could call in some favors. Maybe jail is what I need to ease my boredom." He put thought into it.

Penelope shook her head and left him to his thoughts. He would get bored of them soon enough.