Beau
“Honey, sit down.” Dad stood up then and gave me his chair. Squeezed my shoulder as I walked over, and he dashed inside to pull out a stool for himself. He came back out before I could sit down with his seat in hand and a bottle of water for me. “Food should be out soon. Hungry?”
“Always.” His mustache twitched at my response. Always claimed my sister and I ate like men. No shame. “And thanks for the chair.”
“Hush, kid.”
Once situated, I made sure Aubrey was comfortable before getting back into the conversation of her schooling. “So, you were saying about this school?”
“It’s a privately run academy where our main focus is children with disabilities. Our program runs from Pre-K to 12th grade and works with a large array of social, behavioral, and learning impediments. From Autism to Dyslexia. We work with everything in between.”
“Impressive, right?” Gloria preened beside him, and I felt as though I was missing something important. What was the catch?
Because if it seemed too good to be true, it was. End of.
“And does this school run on grants?”
“It does...” Ivan trailed off, but I waved him on. “But, and this is a minor but, Aubrey doesn’t qualify for any that would cover the complete cost. The state will pay partial tuition, but her mother will be required to come up with half each month.”
“How much?” The knot that had all but disappeared when I stepped into my childhood home had returned with a vengeance. Knowing what was coming and being prepared for it were two very different things.
“Total for one school year is twenty-six grand with the government paying up to ten of that. And truly, that is the best we can do.”
“I see.” What more could I say since I knew who would be footing the bill? They couldn’t even help me now with the co-signing on a personal loan. Their bill-to-earnings ratio had once again been hit, and on paper, it would seem they wouldn’t make enough to pay all that, live comfortably, and add new debt.
Fucked. Utterly and unequivocally, I was fucked.
“Oh, you need to see it, Beau.” My sister smiled, and no matter how large my own problems were at that moment, I did too. Her joy was palpable. Gloria could be self-centered at times, but she was a good mother. “She’s so happy there - Mom came last week and was amazed with just how well she’s doing. How she’s made a friend and everything!”
“Wonderful place, kiddo. Impressed would be putting it lightly,” Mom, who up until that moment had been quiet, said. Her green eyes, identical to my own, were watching Aubrey sleep in my arms. “And her improvements; using verbal cues or the PECS system have helped. She’s happy to be understood.”
“Then this is the place for her,” I whispered while she stirred a bit and resettled herself. Everyone nodded and continued to talk around me. Never would I be selfish enough to take that kind of help from my niece. Aubrey would always come first.
Throughout the rest of that day, I’d nod or answer when spoken to.
My mind was elsewhere. On trying to find a rational solution to all my problems.
And it wasn’t until I was back in my small, studio apartment - that I could no longer afford - that it hit me.
The card.
Zoe’s proposal, which I’d been ignoring. What she explained that night while we talked in her apartment.
***
“No. I’d never sell myself for cash.”
“I never said you had to sleep with him,” Zoe interjected while rolling her eyes, not at all deterred by my reaction. “These men understand that if anything were to ever happen sexually, it’s on your terms and not theirs. A contract would be signed with all the rules and stipulations agreed upon by the parties involved. You’d play the part of girlfriend for one year and reap the benefits.”
“How do you know so much?”
“Because I’m a sugar baby, Beau. Look around you for a moment; how can a grad student afford this apartment and go to school full time without a single cent in debt? My parents aren’t rich, babe. Struggling middle class at best.”
She was right. There was no way for her to afford this on minimum wage unless you came from money.
Nodding, I offered her a half-smile. “It’s a lot to take in.”
“Please don’t be proud and think about it.” Reaching over, she picked up a chip and popped it in her mouth. Took her time chewing while my mind ran a marathon. She(-)those women she hung out with were all like her. A modern-day whore. “Stop it,” Zoe chided. There was a bit of a bite in her tone, and I felt embarrassed. “We aren’t prostitutes or sex slaves. We are women who know what we want and need. What we won’t settle for. Nothing less.”
“I’m going to be honest here, Zoe. This wasn’t what I expected at all.”
“I know that, but what I’m offering will change your life. Let me guide you. Keep you safe while exploring an alternative option that will keep you in school.”
***
“It would be a way out, and no one has to find out. One hundred percent discreet, she said.” Rushing over to my desk, I opened my laptop and settled back against my headboard. “Let’s get this over with,” I mumbled and typed out my search.
I explored the internet for information that night, and what I found was a bit overwhelming. But like everything else in my life, I was going to tackle this head-on. And so, I began to read. Everything and anything to help me transition. Know what to expect.
How To: In the Sugar World.
The Golden Rules for Dating Sugar.
What Type of Sugar Baby Are You?
There was even an article explaining what kind of an allowance one should ask for.
Laying my head back against the padded headboard, I tried to calm my erratic breathing. What the hell was I signing up for?
But then again, I had no choice.
Grabbing my cell off the nightstand, I typed out three words that scared the living daylights out of me before I chickened out.
Zoe, I’m in. ~Beau.