Letters

"My Most Beautiful Queen,

I wished to write you and express my deepest heart and tell you how dear you have become to me. Although we were unable to dance together last night, I know it was not from a lack of your affections for me, but rather the fact you did not want to let everyone else know of how deep out run for the other has already grown. Please know that I think of you my every waking moment, and cannot wait until we can show the world how we truly feel for the other.

Forever Yours,

Marque Pierre."

Anastasia nearly wanted to gag at the butterflies that had flown all but a few seconds ago within her at the thought of being written a love letter. Her headache had returned with a pounding vigor and she questioned weather she had the strength or ability to read another letter. Although it was true she had not danced with Marque Pierre last night, and it was not for her love of the man, but rather her distaste at his performances when it came to women that she refused his company.

She wanted to be valued beyond her gender or the pleasure her attention may bring to a man. Furthermore, she was worthy and deserved all of someone attention, but knew she would not be able to give the same to her future husband. She did not want to have to neglect the man, but her positioned did not afford her the luxury of having enough time to give all of herself to him. Someone like Marquee Pierre would turn to others to fill his time and try to heal his wounded ego when she would neglect him and his advances when she was tired. Besides, he already had several other ladies draped across his arms throughout the night, she had little doubt he needed as well.

In a slight place of despair, Anastasia turned her attention to another letter sitting on her desk. The signet was similar to ones she had seen before, but she was unable to identify where this particular signet came from. With less enthusiasm before, but still a slight anticipation, she opened the letter.

"Your Majesty,

In case I neglected to thank you properly last night for allowing me to dance in your company, thank you. I am well aware my station is well beneath yours, and it may be a while yet before I am viewable as a worthy suitor for yourself, but the small fact you wanted to dance in my company was enough.

You are a great queen, and even if I remain unable to serve you in any other compacity than how I do now, know that I will give everything it takes to see your reign prosper. The opportunities you give not just me, but all of your people are worthy of our adoration. Thank you for the chance to meet you and continue to be in your company.

Forever your humble servant,

Lord Henry of Penel."

Although the butterflies remained calm within her, a smile adorned her face. He was such a sweet and considerate person, that it made it hard to not look past his station. He was caring and considerate of things beyond what he had to be, and she valued that. However, he had not grown up inside the court, even though he was the son of a Duke. The Duke had left his family behind more often than not when he was required to appear in court. It was not because he did not love them, but rather that her loved them enough to want to shield them from the journey to the court every year, and from the additional politics that accompanied the months spend within the walls of the castle.

It wasn't until Lord Henry was 13 that he was finally brought to the castle for the first time. His inexperience put him at risk of ridicule, and although he could and would learn as time went on, she hated to subject anyone to the harsh realities of court unnecessarily.

Her gaze glanced at the third letter, and she carefully picked it up, but before she could open it to begin reading its contents, a knock sounded on the door. One of her aides came rushing in and stated she needed to get ready for the Ladies Luncheon. With a sigh and a forlorn glance as the tea she had neglected to drink to help sooth her headache, she got up and followed the aid to the dinning hall where they would be serving the luncheon today, as it was still a little wet form outside to host the luncheon under the pavilion as they normally would in spring.

As she approached the door to the luncheon room, she heard the quieted whispers of those within. She paused for a moment and tried to listen to the conversations being held within.

"I don't even see the point in continuing on wondering who the Queen is going to choose for the pairing season. Prince Taren already has the title and training to do everything Karthia needs him to do. In fact, he may be able to take over ruling so that she can finally focus on having a family." It was obviously one of the older and higher classes ladies speaking, as no one dared speak over her. However, her statements did not sit well with everyone and one of the younger ladies spoke up.

"She is not a bad queen and does not need somebody to replace her or rule for her. She simply needs someone to give her an heir. Imagine the children she and Duke Vern would have. With his pale blue eyes and tall frame, his children are bound to be beautiful."

"But he hates the courts. Besides, Prince Taren is just as good looking as he is." Another spoke up.

"Maybe she chooses someone who doesn't have a high title so that she doesn't have to worry about being replaced."

"But anyone like that is simply looking to power grab, and I refuse to bow to someone who is just trying to get ahead in life." It was the same woman who she had first heard speak.

Anastasia couldn't listen any longer. She wished she could have walked away and avoided the luncheon all together, but then she would be seen as flimsy and she couldn't have that. So she walked in, and the entire room hushed as they stood and bowed.

She was their queen, and even if they talked behind her back they had to show respect to her face. She nearly laughed at the irony of it all. They could talk and say the most inconsiderate things, but as long as they bowed before her she was powerless. If today would prove anything to her, it was that she would have to be even more careful than she was before about how she handle the coming months. Although she would be the one to decide who she would marry, an entire court would judge the decisions without all the facts she had.