BEAUTY OF INNOCENCE

The heavy rain that fell last few days continued the same pattern with no changes. Bernard's delay made Nandana Menike rather uneasy. Though Periyavar insisted her to have lunch, she turned a deaf ear to it and waited for Bernard. Since darkness was progressing, she went down to light the lamp.

"Here… I prepared some tea for you… at least have these… you are still with an empty stomach… who knows what time he would turn up… A lot of things have to be loaded and transported… it is not an easy task…"

Periyavar had a sound knowledge of loading and unloading goods when people moved from place to place and also the problems faced by them in that process.

"Even Bappa didn't come back…"

"How can he come leaving Hamu all alone…? They will finish everything and come back… what a hell of work they have, Chuti Menike…?"

After having tea, she went up to the second floor with the lamp. She placed the lit lamp beside the wedding photo of Bernard, on the cabinet. She turned her eyes towards the smiling face of Sandra. Nandana Menike obviously thought that Sandra would not come back to Bernard's world.

Her image was found in Sandra's image. What a resemblance it was indeed! Only someone well-known to Sandra would be able to distinguish the slight differences. Young Bernard's handsome and graceful look stole Nandana Menike's heart enchanting her entire body and soul. Her mind urged again the touch of his somewhat grown beard, on her cheeks, neck and breasts.

All of a sudden, Samantha's innocent smile crept into her mind. For a moment some memories of him flashed back like in a film, which brought a sense of penitence. She recollected how he expected her genuine love and trust helplessly wasting his time and energy. And how he failed to convert his thoughts into words on many occasions. Then she remembered how Bernard crept into her world overtaking Samantha. It was the first experience she had on the day of her puberty ceremony. The strange feeling that overwhelmed her when Bernard embraced her forehead. His behavior, actions, verbal fluency, in fact almost all movements created an everlasting impression on her heart. Her sub consciousness strongly argued with her consciousness that she had never planted the seed of possession of Bernard on the meadow of her heart. She did fail to abstain from thinking of Bernard as he had awakened her mind and body at an unexpected moment.

"Can you carefully take Hamu in, Periyavar…?"

Nandana Menike was awakened by the loud voice. She saw Bernard being accompanied by Periyavar and some other guys. Kapilasena was among them. Bernard was made to lie down on the settee as he was fully drunk. Nandana Menike with a perplexed expression looked at him first and then others.

"Menike…"

Her mood was changed by the call of Kapilasena. She turned towards him.

"Day after tomorrow, early morning, we are moving to Ulhitiya…"

Nandana Menike's appearance was keenly observed by Kapilasena as he too could see the transformation of Nandana Menike.

"Have had something to eat…?"

"Now it is too late… Hamu bought packets for everyone… there's more to drink than to eat…! Still there are three or four people who can't even get up… all on four legs…! You see… even this one…" Kapilasena commented on pointing at Bernard.

"Bappe… what about mother…? Any information about her…?"

"I'm planning to go to Somawathiya in a couple of days' time, after taking all these to Ulhitiya… and settling them there…"

"Tell me when you go… I'm also coming with you…"

He shook his head in agreement. Spending about half an hour at the bungalow, the people went back disregarding the heavy rain. Kapilasena too left the place as he had to attend to a lot of work.

"Let Hamu sleep here… I 'll also put a mat here and sleeps beside him…" Promising to keep an eye on Bernard, Periyavar went down to bring the necessary stuff for the night.

With a trembling mind, Nandana Menike approached Bernard. Bernard was off his mind and couldn't feel anything around him. She gently rubbed his cheeks by her right hand.

"Sandra…!" He murmured in a low voice. Nandana Menike slowly removed the pair of shoes he was wearing. After a few minutes, Periyavar came up with all the stuff to spend the night with him.

* * *

Getting up early morning, Nandana Menike came to the living room. Bernard was found to be still asleep on the settee. Periyavar rested for a moment on the steps of the second floor, as he was fetching two buckets of water from the well. Nandana Menike, on seeing him, went to assist him.

"If you had called me, I would have come…" Taking one bucket of water, she said.

She followed Periyavar and it was the first time she entered the third floor of the bungalow. She surveyed the Bernard's room. The neatly arranged bed, the huge digital close up photo of Bernard and Sandra, which looked bigger than the real images of them and almost every item inside brought an impression to her mind.

"Chuti Menike… Chuti Menike…! Give me the bucket…" She was shaken by that call and then only she realized that still she was holding that bucket of water.

Periyavar poured the water into the bath tub in the washroom.

"Two more buckets of water would be enough…"

Periyavar decided to go to the well again looking at the half-filled tub. Nandana Menike too joined him. Bernard had not got up even when they came for the second with water.

Periyavar went down to prepare dinner and she went to the well again and had a body wash. She put on the short frock, which she put on the previous day. She could not see Bernard on the settee, when she came back after the wash. The door of the room was half closed. She entered it uninvited. The sound came from the washroom gave a clear indication that Bernard was inside.

Nandana Menike sat down on the bed. She looked around again and then pressed the mattress and felt the comfort of it. There was a night dress beside the pillow. She guessed that to be Sandra's. She lay down on the bed and closed her eyes. For a moment she was in a world, which she had no words to explain. She started wondering with inexpressible thoughts as how Bernard would be reacting, when he saw her lying on bed in that way. She heard the unlocking sound of the door and turned her eyes towards him.

He was surprised to see Nandana Menike lying on his bed in that way. Covering his body with a towel, he came out of the washroom and stood motionlessly ant looked at her in astonishment. The nature of his facial expression was not what Nandana Menike expected. She was petrified by his sharp look. She got up from the bed with a terrified look.

"Who asked you to come here…? I don't like anybody coming into my room…" His voice was loud, harsh and straight.

Nandana Menike started shivering like a fish out of water. She bit her lower lip to control herself from the sense of fear. He angrily threw away the bed sheet laid on his bed. She felt like a violent tsunami coming over her and devastating her world mercilessly.

"Periyavar… Periyavar…! What the hell are doing man…? Where were you man…? Are you deaf man…?" His eyes were full of fire and the words he used vibrated the walls of the bungalow.

Nandana Menike, trembling with fear, went out of the room. She, being unable to bear the shock, ran down the steps crying bitterly. Periyavar, seeing Nandana Menike running like a mad woman, shedding tears, ran to the third floor being unable to comprehend anything. He noticed Bernard looking at the horizon far in the distance, with a confused mind. A furious look was visible on his face.

Nandana Menike lying on her bed, buried her face in her hands and wept. She cuddled up the pillow and cried as much as she could. The sweet dream she had been dreaming for a couple of hours scattered within a few seconds before her own eyes in a brutal manner. Through the tears, she saw the real world to which she could fit in. She understood the fact that being the illegitimate child born to a deformed daughter of the estate guard, had no right whatsoever to deserve love from an aristocrat, the social circle to which she couldn't enter even in dreams. The throwing away of the bed sheet, symbolically indicated how it had got dirtied and spoilt because of the touch of a working-class girl. She got up from the bed and wiped out the rolling tears along her cheeks. She understood that she had gone behind a mirage losing everything. Her fate had destined her to be a Cinderella forever, but not to be a queen of a prince. She thought so. Finally, she came to a decision, to say good bye to the bungalow and its people.

* * *