Six

"Where's Maya?" I yelled over the music. A bartender cleared the empty glasses from the coffee table in front of us. My head was fuzzy with alcohol and I felt giddy, but not drunk to the level I should be after the amount of drinks we had. Catherine, the raver, kept pace with me. She held herself as if the alcohol did not affect her at all and only through small slips did I catch how drunk she was.

"She is making out with some random guy upstairs somewhere," Catherine replied, sounding bitter. "Where's Tony?"

"He had to go," I answered. Catherine gestured for another round of shots. The burn of the alcohol was there but not as intense as earlier in the night, a clear indicator that maybe I was more drunk than I realized.

"I'm tired of sitting," Catherine suddenly announced. "Let's dance!"

She pulled me to the dance floor and I did not resist. Alcohol loosened my body and blood and I could feel the beat resound through my bones. Catherine raised her arms and light cascaded over her like a wave, setting her dress alight with the glitter of gold. Her skin was covered in glitter and flecks of neon paint, a neon kiss appearing on her cheek as ultraviolet light passed over the crowd. It alit second faces and reflected against teeth, catching on clothes and hands.

I wanted to bathe in the beauty of it all. We danced to the beat and sang along to the songs that we knew, holding each other tight to avoid getting swept away in the crowd. Sweat rolled down my back and I could feel strands of hair sticking to my face. It felt like the best night of my life.

Smoke filled the room and the light diffused through the air, casting the club in a dreamlike quality. Strobing lights slowed the world. At some point Catherine had neon paint on her lips and gave me a kiss to match the one on her cheek. My head was dressed in a crown of white flowers. Strangers placed glowstick necklaces and bracelets on us. We were integrated into the glowing mass of bodies that filled the floor, pressed into everyone and everyone pressed into us.

"Bathroom!" Catherine yelled at me. We made our way back through the crowd, sneaking another shot on our way past the bar to the bathrooms beside it. They were lit in pink neon and filled with women retouching makeup or waiting on friends. Catherine disappeared into a stall and I hoisted myself up onto the sink, swinging my legs as I waited.

My attention was diverted as Maya came rushing in, not bothering to close the stall she stumbled into before she threw up. I jumped down from the sink and walked over to her, pushing her hair away from the bowl of the toilet. Somewhere along the way she had lost her pins. When she finished, she glanced up at me with unfocused eyes.

"Hey Audrey," she slurred.

"Hey, where have you been?" I asked gently.

"Around," Maya giggled. She shuddered and turned back towards the bowl, emptying her stomach. "Where's Kitty Cat?"

"Here," Catherine said, standing in the door to the stall. "Are you alright, baby?"

"Splendid," Maya replied. She wiped her mouth with toilet paper and flushed. I steadied her as she rose to her feet, awkwardly wobbling on her heels. I glanced down and saw that one was broken. "Can we go get some water?"

Catherine wrapped Maya's other arm around her shoulder and together we half-carried her to the bar. Immediately, the bartender passed over an unopened bottle of water and we moved back to the lounges underneath the mezzanine. Maya sipped on the bottle.

"Good enough, I suppose," Catherine commented but she still looked concerned. The interaction had sobered us both up a bit.

I grabbed a tie from my clutch and gathered Maya's hair up.

"Thanks Audie," Maya said, leaning into me. "Can I call you Audie?"

"It's barely a nickname," Catherine remarked.

"Of course," I replied. The music shifted with a change in DJs, remixed pop transitioning into hard electronic. Maya moaned and tried to cover her ears, spilling water as she did. Catherine removed the bottle from her hands and returned the lid.

"Let's take her upstairs," I offered.

"Sure, but you're carrying her."

Despite her words, Catherine helped us stumble up the four flights of stairs. Maya somehow found her feet as we passed one of the apartments and ran giggling into the bathtub ball pit, kicking off her heels in the process.

"Join me!" she exclaimed, as if she had not vomited a quarter of an hour earlier. Catherine obliged and tugged me in next to her until we were all sitting in the foam-lined tub together, pink balls like bubbles around us.

"This was not how I expected the night to go," Catherine said while Maya threw the balls up into the air. "What's the plan?"

I checked the time on my phone. It was only one. "How did you get here?"

"Bus," Maya groaned.

"We were hoping Tony could give us a lift home," Catherine responded.

"He won't be back for two more hours," I said. "We could wait for him or take a taxi."

Catherine glanced at Maya. "What do you want to do?"

"Let's wait for Antonio," she replied, saying his name as if she were tasting it. "I'm feeling better now. Can we dance?"

Catherine narrowed her eyes at her. "No, we are going to sit here until you sober up. How much did you drink anyway?"

Maya shrugged. "I wasn't keeping track."

"Maybe free drinks was a bad idea," Catherine sighed. Maya made a sound of disagreement.

Catherine massaged the bridge of her nose. After a period of silence, I glanced over to Maya to find her asleep with her head against the back of the tub. Catherine pushed a ball towards me. I pushed it back.

"I'm thinking of breaking up with Connor," she said quietly.

I blinked at her. "Okay."

She turned to glare at me. "You're supposed to ask why."

"We aren't teenagers anymore. If you feel like you need to break up with him, then you have your reasons. You don't need me for confirmation."

"That's too reasonable."

I levelled a gaze at her then relented. "Okay, why?"

"Well I think..." Catherine trailed off, her eyes falling on Maya's sleeping body. The look alone spoke more words than she could. "Shit, I don't know anymore, Audrey. I like Connor well enough but sometimes he scares me. Like, really scares me."

Catherine turned towards me, genuine concern in her eyes. "He doesn't usually stay over but... he did the other night. I woke up to him sitting up, staring blankly at a wall. His mouth was open, as if he was screaming but no sound was coming out. Then he just... started crying and there was nothing I could do. He reacted to nothing."

Tears hovered glasslike in her eyes. "I asked him what happened the next morning and he dodged all my questions. But he looked scared, so I know he was lying because why else would he look so terrified and—and you're not surprised."

I opened my mouth, a lie already on my tongue, then shook my head — both in response to Catherine's statement and to remove the lie from my mouth.

"Look, I can't really say anything about it," I started. "If you want to know more, you should ask him. But I want you to know that when it happens, it doesn't hurt him, okay? It's just like a nightmare and it is true, afterwards he barely remembers what it was about. Most of all, he is no danger to you."

Guilt tightened in my chest. It was partially the truth but I could not reveal more without misplacing Connor's trust in me to keep his episodes a secret.

"Talk to him about it," I reiterated. "If you don't like what he has to say, you don't have to stay."

Catherine nodded and I gave her the time she needed to regather herself. She wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and gave me a wobbly smile, a promise that she would be alright.

My attention flickered to Maya as the plastic balls around her began moving. It took me a moment to process that she what was happening.

"Cat, roll her over," I ordered with an urgency in my voice. I stumbled out of the tub, balls flying everywhere, while Cat turned around and began pushing Maya onto her side. I ran to her other side, pulling her shaking body out of the tub. Easing her to the floor, I turned Maya on her side.

"Go get someone," I ordered. Catherine was frozen still, staring blankly at Maya.

"Catherine," I snapped and she snapped her eyes to me. I repeated the order as she scrambled out of the tub.

"Who?" she asked, panic in her voice.

"A bartender, a bouncer, anyone. Go!"

I did not wait to watch her leave, instead turning my attention back to Maya. My first aid training started and stopped during high school and I could only hope I remembered how to help her. Panic began to tighten my chest but I forced myself to stay focused. I placed myself between the tub and her, shoving the nearest balls out of the way. The seconds seemed to drag like minutes. Froth formed at her mouth and then mixed with vomit. The seizure stopped shortly afterwards and I could only hope that she was ok.

Gently, I moved her away from the pool of her vomit and removed what else I could from the inside of her mouth. I kept a finger on her pulse, counting the seconds as if they were hours.

She was still unconscious when a bouncer arrived. The woman remained calm as she took over.

"How long was she convulsing for?"

"Three minutes," I replied. "She stopped about a minute ago."

People were poking their heads into the apartment.

"I need you to call an ambulance then keep everyone out of here."

I nodded and grabbed my phone. Catherine took over for the second order, clearing everyone out of the room and entryway. I began ringing the paramedics, watching as the bouncer checked Maya's pulse, breathing, and mouth. The bouncer began speaking into her radio before rolling Maya back onto her back.

"—your emergency?" the operator questioned.

I explained the situation quickly, watching in abject horror as the bouncer began administering CPR on Maya. Unlike before, time sped up. The call ended with assurance that paramedics were on their way and I lowered my phone.

Swallowing bile I forced myself to turn away and help Catherine. The lights had switched to fluorescents, replacing the neon. The music had shut off and people were being escorted down the stairs.

"Make a path," I ordered, gently shoving the people away from the doorway. My hands were trembling and my body felt like I was walking on a wire strung between two buildings. Catherine was further down, turning people back towards the stairs.

Another bouncer pushed through the stairwell and made his way into the room to assist the woman. The floor was empty when the paramedics entered from the elevator, rushing towards the room with a stretcher between them.

Catherine rejoined me inside the room, clutching my arm in a vice-like grip. She pressed a hand to her mouth to stifle a sob as the paramedics began working on Maya.

Everything passed in a blur. Maya was removed in the stretcher. A paramedic pulled us to the side to question us. Catherine answered questions I couldn't; medical history, family contact information, what we did before coming to the club. Medications? How many drinks?

Then we were alone and the building was so soundproofed that we could not hear the sound of the sirens. Catherine collapsed into my arms and I held her against me. It was then that I looked at my hands for the first time underneath the white light and saw not only vomit but blood dried on my hands.