Chapter Eight - Kace

"Kace, who are you texting?" my mom asked, and I looked up to see her standing in front of me. I was so focused on talking to Nix I didn't notice that she walked in. And my face hurt… I was smiling too much for just a simple text. I'm an idiot.

"Just a friend from school," I answered, and she glared at me suspiciously.

"Well, you need to go to bed now. Tell your friend goodnight," she said, and instantly I went stiff. It seemed like I always forgot… I have to sleep.

As I told Nix goodnight, I tried to ignore that my hands were shaking, and my heart was racing in my ears. I didn't want to go to bed, I didn't want to sleep, and I didn't want to throw another fit. But I had to sleep, I knew that, and I also knew that it was good for me, but I was so afraid.

"Please don't make me go," I asked her, my voice shaky and barely above a whisper. "Please, I can't."

"Kace, you have to go. Don't make me go get your father," she threatens, and it works. If dad comes, he'll pick me up and carry me to bed, he'll touch me. Slowly, I get to my feet and I follow her to the stairs. Then it's one step up, two, five, and I can't move anymore. I can't make myself do this; if I fall asleep, bad things will happen.

I start to backtrack, going back down the stairs, but mom turns and notices. She sighs and calls, "Richard?"

Instantly, I run. "Richard!" she calls louder, but I'm already in the kitchen, running to the study. If I get there I can get in and lock the door. I'll be safe there, and they won't be able to get me. I can't sleep, I can't; bad things will happen. I just have to get-

Suddenly two arms wrapped me and picked me up into the air. Instantly, my whole body went off, and it felt as though my skin was screaming, "He's touching me he's touching me he's touching me he's touching hE'S TOUCHING ME HE'S TOUCHING ME". I screamed, and my dad moved me so he was carrying me side-ways; this way, I couldn't kick him, but it didn't stop me from trying.

"Let go!!! LET GO!!!" I screamed at him while trying to punch and kick my way out, but it was no use; my dad had tucked one arm between my body and his chest, and the other was held tightly in his grip. I couldn't move and I couldn't get out. While I still tried to escape, my dad started carrying me to the stairs, ignoring my screams and my crying. When he started to climb the steps, my body gave up, and I started to sob. "Don't touch me… Don't touch me… Please don't touch me," was the only thing I could get out.

My dad carried me up the rest of the stairs and into my room, only loosening his grip on me to lay me down on the bed. As he did, I instantly backed up against the wall and hugged myself tightly. I was shaking violently now and crying so hard I could barely breathe. My dad sighed. "I'm sorry, Kace. I hope you can get some sleep."

He walked away, and after a moment, my brain registered what he said, and I jumped off my bed to run after him. However, it was too late and the door slammed in my face with the familiar sound of a click that told me that I was locked in. I banged my fists against the door and yelled for someone to let me out, but no one came, and I knew they wouldn't. This happened last night, the night before that, and the night before that. It was a cycle that never stopped.

I curled up against the door and cried, thinking about what just happened. Why did I always throw such tantrums? My mind knew that I shouldn't be afraid, but I was. What was wrong with me? Then suddenly a weird feeling settled in followed by fear; I was falling asleep. Instantly, I stood up, and I pinch the skin on my arms to keep myself awake. I can't fall asleep. Bad things will happen.

What bad things? I asked myself, but I didn't know. I sat back down on my bed and pressed my back against the wall. Every time I felt like I was falling, I would pinch myself. It happened over and over again, but I didn't care. As long as I didn't fall asleep everything would be okay.

I thought of Nix and what he would say, but I didn't know that either. Would he think that I was a freak, like everyone else did? Even my parents thought I was; this was the best they could do with me. This was tolerance. I cried some more, hugging myself so I couldn't shake, and sooner or later, I passed out, falling into a nightmarish sleep.