Hearts Untold

Resting under the entrance of a cave that became a well welcomed refuge to the storm that rolled in just moments after they made up their mind to land, Nova and Beil were huddled in front of a makeshift fire Beil had managed to gather dry wood for right before the downpour began. It had quickly gone from clear and dry to heavy overcast as thick curtains of water began layering the ground, with almost no transition.

It was also oddly perfect timing, like a predetermined event, and Nova watched the skies to try and see if this was just a patch of clouds bursting open or if this was a freak weather pattern that would turn into an all night thing, especially when it was raining while the sun was still brightly shining just a league or two away.

"Okay, so let's get back on topic," she started and was almost immediately distracted when she noticed Beil twisting water out of his new bowtie before carefully placing it close to the heat of the fire to dry it. That got her thinking, if she was to turn into her human form while her scales were wet, would that dampen her morphing garb?

Hold on, stay focused, that wasn't even close to relevant. Shifting gears, Nova rubbed her face with her tail and shifted into a better position to see him. When he saw her eyes on him he cleared his throat

"You wanted to know many things, I could see it in your eyes. Which detail are you looking to learn about first?"

Beil still sounded.... off. His voice lacked a certain relaxed air to it, and instead of the soft tones she was used to that made her feel understood and that he enjoyed her company, it was close to what you would expect a parent to sound like, that stern, careful way of speaking... Well, almost, there was something else in there. A flutter of hesitation. At the moment Nova wanted nothing more than to forget the past and reach for him, to encourage that inkling of consideration he was trying to maintain that she had a feeling he wouldn't do for a stranger, but only for a moment. What was more important, the possibility of them having feelings for eachother, no matter the kind or any possible outcome to revealing them, or the life threatening situation he had been in?

'That was rhetorical, dammit,' Nova thought to herself when her mind drifted to that close moment they had shared: when after his incredibly personal words she felt like she was going to kiss him, and at the last second she had panicked, resulting in him walking away.

Taking a deep breath to control herself and to keep from falling further into that rabbit hole, Nova looked up into his downturned eyes, ready to listen.

"I would like to know how you had become so injured while I was unconscious."

"That is something I plan on telling you about after I understand why you made the decision not to postpone using your energy and give it time to build back up, or search for me with only your eyes. The moment I came to realize that you were no longer behind me while we were walking I found the closest bench and sat down to wait for you, but you continued moving for almost an hour without looking up, completely unaware that you had left me behind at some point."

Even though his voice was even and he spoke at a natural pace, Nova winced in guilt and looked away, watching the fire flick around just as chaotically as her mind to avoid looking at the disappointment on his face.

"I didn't mean to do that, I just... I ended up thinking too hard and completely forgot to check my surroundings. And about the energy, when my body used it up as quickly as it did, with no warning, I felt the need to find you practically triple."

"Please explain what you mean by that."

Feeling a little shocked, Nova felt her face warm under her scales and twisted her tail up a little tighter. "Well I... uh... I'm too used to having you around when I was struggling, and you always helped me when I needed you the most, it got to the point that not having you next to me was... unusual. No, it was uncomfortable. I, uh... I need you to know why I held back like that, it wasn't your fault at all, and I trust you, I'm just... new to all of this, and--"

"Nova," he said sharply and her head snapped up. She had been rambling and staring at the cave floor and missed the fact that his face had very briefly returned red. When he spoke next his voice was a little bit softer. "What did you mean when you said 'your body used up your energy without warning'?"

Confusion sank into a feeling of being bitterly discouraged, with a touch of hurt that felt like a spear had jabbed Nova in the back. She lowered her head back down to collect herself before she stamped down her reaction. Of course he would focus on the important information first, she was strong but she was still a danger to herself just like every other Yokai that could harness Spirit Energy, but it still bothered her considerably that he hadn't even acknowledged what she had said, even by just telling her to talk about it later. He wasn't usually this distant. Had her initial reaction been that much of a miscalculation that his naturally playful and sweet demeanor was gone forever towards her now?

Little did she know Beil's voice and response was so reserved because he was carefully fighting himself in order to maintain control of his own emotions. He had not missed the changing expressions on her face, the shaking in her voice from nerves, and even while she was a snake her eyes and body language made it pretty obvious that she had expected a bit more reciprocation. With that knowledge he was restraining himself from feeling euphoria of any kind. She liked him, it was stupidly obvious, but that in and of itself was an issue. Just how much did she like him? Was it as a really good friend? Did she consider him to be an older brother? A father figure? That kind of older gentleman you could trust but not get involved with romantically?

Beil tried to calm himself down. She was very young, inexperienced, and not only that she lacked knowledge of this world to a degree that he was starting to understand would cause her too much trouble later in life to be worried about her feelings right now. He had to keep her on the more important topic, which meant he had to postpone what he really wanted.

Besides, had she continued talking about him like that and looking at him with those sharp but shimmering eyes of hers, with that naive, warm, and nervous expression filled with anticipation, he might have given in and let the world fall away just to hear her speak her heart. He knew better, or at least he should know better, and besides, he was not a proper match for someone special like her.

And it was those fluttery new emotions circulating within her that were distracting her so effectively that she could wander off like a sleep walker. They were starting to become a big problem.

Beil flexed his wings to try and ease the tension building up from holding himself back, from getting worried for her sake, and from the lingering pain protecting her had cost him. He realized that he did not mind the pain much, it proved that he was alive and seeing her sitting across from him proved that he had saved her.

As much as he would like to listen to her keep talking, and although it was very cute that she misunderstood his question to such a degree in the first place, the fact that her own body was yet again doing something dangerous against her will was of a much higher of a priority.

"Nova," he asked and she looked up from the flames, a strangly tested look in her eye as she watched him shift his weight, "please explain what you meant about your energy draining."

For a quiet second she watched him, those unwavering eyes of hers locked onto his in that enthralling manner he had still not grown used to, and most likely never would, and before she spoke he started thinking back to when he had first snatched her up. She had been so charismatic and innocent at first glance, curious and inappropriately casual about the carelessness of whomever had dumped her soul into a snake... but ironically that was one of the best decisions that Yokai could have made. She was beginning to become much more powerful than if she had been placed within an everyday ogre or humanoid Yokai... but now the intensify of it was causing damage to her soul connection, hopefully not irredeemable.

Finally she spoke, but her voice was quieter than usual, no longer holding that boisterous know-it-all resonance he'd come to delight in, and it made him feel both guilty and uneasy. It was safe to say that she was sounding tired, but whether that was phisically or emotionally, he could not tell.

"When I was attempting to climb a tree in my human form, my body gave me a strangly powerful boost, shooting me like an arrow up to the top in an instant," she said and watched his reaction. He sat patiently, hearing her out, but making no indication that he was going to ease up any time soon. Visibly saddened, which pinched at Beil's conscience at bit, Nova continued.

"When I reached the top I was a little surprised so I tried to grab the uppermost branch to hold myself up long enough to readjust to one of the sturdy lower ones, except that the Spirit Energy rushed into my arms and legs without me telling it to do so and I became weightless. I could just stand on the leaves as if they were solid ground, isn't that neat," she asked with a slightly lighter voice, trying to emphasize her excitement and get a reaction out of him. She got one, but not what she hoped it would be.

"That is interesting, and it proves my theory that your energy had become too strong for your body to regulate on it's own without training or inhibitors of some kind," he said steadily. Nova breathed out in defeat, not realizing she had been holding her breath until afterwards.

Something in Beil broke when he saw her that way, downtrodden and throwing in the towel like that. Feeling the tightness in his chest and wings again he would have grit his teeth and clenched his hands if he had any, this was much harder than he had ever expected.

It struck him pretty hard suddenly, even with all that was hanging in the balance, even after all these quiet and lonely years, that he loved her. Immediately he felt anxious. He couldn't just allow himself to love her so selfishly, she was a fraction of his age, she was stronger and, quite frankly, smarter than him already. She was gorgeous and gregarious. She was bold and protective, charming and comfortable, adorably impatient with him. She was everything. Beil's heart lit a fire that he had no say about, even if he tried to fight it.

It was an amazing feeling, and also terribly complicated.

On that note, what the heck did she even like about him? She knew what he was now, and even if they had both been human in the past things were different than before. He felt like a piece of shit when he had seen her shrink away upon the mention of what his specific kind of Yokai did to people, but what if he had chosen not to reveal his differences from them about himself? Would she have been disgusted with him or treaded lighter around him?...Would she have even stuck around?

The first day they had met he assumed she was being chipper and friendly with him because he had almost eaten her and she was trying to win him over to save her own life, or maybe because she was alone and too new to the Hidden Realm and just needed help, having no body else to turn to. She had, after all, just lost the first and only person she'd met after regaining consciousness to a chivalrous self sacrifice. That was an intense transition, what if she had been traumatized and clung to him as a kind of rebound?

He himself had quickly chosen to help her, not because at the time he was in love with her yet, not hardly. Sure he was intrigued, but after he had helped her he had planned on moving on with his solitary life.

Ah that was it. When she was in his Nana's hut, once she became human it was like a part of him started to focus more on her than himself. That spell... had it altered his way of thinking?

Well, maybe. It had sure triggered the beginnings of seeing her as anything more than just a stranger in need, and even if the first emotions were not exactly real, it provided a catalyst for personifing her and gave him a sense of longing back when he thought time had done away with such a thing. It opened his eyes to the fact that she is a woman and, however slim of a chance it may be, they could get together.

She was already a prodigy of a kin soul, given enough time he assumed she would figure things out on her own and be just fine, make connections, forge her own path, leave him behind... but she stuck around. He had developed a habit of helping her without thinking much about it, and she had no doubt grown content with his presence, she had just mentioned as much, and the most fascinating part of all of this was just how easy it was for her to pick up on information in terms of history, or culture, magic, or the structure of the realms, but not her own feelings.

What was it that had put her at such a setback lately? She used to duck and weave with every new thing that was thrown at her, including literal rocks when she was in her meditative state that he would not have thrown if he thought the would hurt her or if she would not detect them, but now anything that happened that directly or indirectly effected them negatively spurred her into a fit of anger or immaturity, especially in his defense. Were these occurrences stressing her out? Had all of these pieces of straw that were building up finally broken the camel's back?

Or... was it that she actually liked him that much? She never seemed as bothered when anything inconvenient, insulting, or even dangerous was aimed at herself instead of him.

All of this flew through Beil's mind in a matter of a few minutes, and within that time Nova had curled into a ball and flopped her head over herself like a sock on a laundry pile. She looked like she had become a little bit empty. Beil's heart lurched and before he could stop himself he stood up. He did not understand fully what made him do so, but he was taking the chance while his mind was made up.

When he was only a step away from her Nova looked up slowly to see why he was so close, but what she least expected was for Beil lean sign and put his head up against hers. Frozen like a deer, and starting to wonder if this was real when he began nuzzling her neck gently with his beak, Nova's heart jumped into her throat.

"Ah, uh... B...Beil? Wha...what... are you doing?"