Chapter 5: Follow My Lead

I looked at my friend for a little bit longer, as I saw he had a bit of a blank look on his face, as if he had not heard, or not been paying any sort or attention to what it was that I had just said to him not too long before now. How ever, I knew that it was normal for him to act like that, as I knew that he was always well aware with his surroundings, and what it was that people said to him, even if it did not look to be so.

I was used to it at this point, so it did not bother me at all any more, as I rolled my eyes, and I then dipped my head to the ground at the exact same time as well, as just as he was doing, I let my mind think in the silence for a little bit of some time, so that I could think to my self at the very least.

I blinked a few times, as I looked below me as well, as I had some how managed to forget what it was that we had even been talking about before hand. I stared down at the ground, as I was the one with the blank look in my own face this time, as it was clear to me, much unlike it was clear for him, I had not a clue as to what was going on.

As I looked at the ground, I looked at the cat food that was in front of me for some time, as it felt almost like it was trying to tell me some thing for some odd reason or another, as if a bunch of dry food could some how speak to the cat that tended to eat on it just about every day.

It was not telling me to not eat it, or to eat it for that matter, so much as it felt like it was trying to tell me to do some thing much different than that. I tilted my head a little bit, as I wondered if I was perhaps going crazy. It sure felt like it, if I was trying to talk to some dry food that was on the ground in a little plastic bowl beneath me.

I shook my head, as I tried my best not too think on that, as I thought back on what it was that we had been talking on not too long before now. It hit me at the same time too, that I knew now that I was in fact going crazy. I was thinking about leaving a perfectly safe home, for a scary world out side of the two leg place.

What was the point in me doing all of that? What good would all of that do? I did not know how to make it out there for one, so I would more than likely die in one of my first days out there. I did not know how to hunt, nor did I know whether or not I was even a fast cat that would be able to hunt in the first place.

I kept my head dipped a little bit low to the ground, as it kind of felt like I was just making a whole lot of excuses, and for what reason? I had always dreamed of living out in the wild, even if living in a two leg place was in fact a whole lot safer. I also knew that this two leg family did not want me, nor did they care about me.

It had only been the younger two leg that had even given me any sort of notice, and now not even she did that. I knew that they were going to take me to the shelter soon, and the odds of getting out of that, I did not even want to think about if I was going to be perfectly honest with my self.

Not just that either, but Ben had also told me that he had a cat that would help me, and teach me how to hunt, and all of that other non sense. Well, maybe it was not non sense for that matter, as I knew it was what I would need to even stand a chance of making it out in the wild.

Ben used to tell me that there used to be a large group of cats that lived out in the wild, and they called them selves the clans. If you asked me that sounded like a whole bunch of non sense, but at the same time too, I wondered if there might in fact be some thing still like that in the wild, where I could live with other cats.

I did not want to be alone, and I knew that. I hated to be alone, and having Ben come over, made my days feel a whole lot better. I kept my head to the ground at the thought of that as well, as my hopes had just been going up until that point. I knew that if I went out there, I might not ever get to see my friend Ben ever again.

It hurt me to think on that, but at the same time too, I also knew that I could not dwell on it. He did not want to live out in the wild, and I could not force him to do so. He had told me time and time again, that the wild was a scary place to, but now it seemed like he was telling me other wise for some odd reason or another.

I closed my eyes for a little bit of some time, as I could not think in my right mind, as to why that could be so. As my mind managed to race through some thoughts how ever, I then realized as to why that was in fact so. It was the dream I had last night, as I had nearly forgot that up to this point.

Some cat had come up to me in that dream, and told me to follow the sun, which I had seen led to a very tall place that seemed to reach up in to the sky, almost as if it was trying to touch the sun. At first I had shaken it off, as I thought it had just been my sub conscious trying to get me to do some thing very stupid, but after what Ben had told me, I was starting to think other wise.

I had so many thoughts racing through my head all at once, as I was not sure as to what was real, and what was not at this point. I gulped a little bit, as the thoughts kind of scared me, which was a bit strange, and a bit crazy, as it was not normal for me to be scared by a dream as simple as that one, much less get scared of hardly any thing.

I opened my eyes, as it hit me at the same time too, as to why I was in fact so scared. I was scared of moving on with my life, and I was for some reason scared of doing some thing that I had always wanted to do. Why all of the sudden was I suddenly having second thoughts on all of this, and thinking that it might possible be a very bad idea to do so.

I shook my head, as luckily enough for me, finally, and thankfully I heard the voice of my friend Ben begin to speak to me, as I lifted my head up at the same time too, so that I could hear what it was that he had to say to me. As I looked at me friend, he finally continued to speak, once he noticed that I had my eyes, and my focus fully on him.

"You aren't going to at least say a final goodbye to your home?" He asked me, as I blinked a few times, taking in what it was that he had just said to me at the same time as well. I let out a bit of a sigh, as I turned my head around me, looking all across the two leg home that I had spent practically my entire life, at least the parts that I could remember in.

I dipped my head a bit low to the ground, at the same time too, once again, as I knew that I did in fact have good memories here, and they weren't just all sad and painful memories, of the fact than none of the two legs payed me any sort of attention, besides the fact that they gave me food before I got up in the mornings.

There was a point, when the younger two leg came up to me, and rubbed on me for nearly the entire day, besides the times when her parents called her in for dinner. It felt like, now that the season had begun to run cold, that the entire family of two legs had all joined up with the cold as well.

It hurt me a lot, as I did love my two legs, but I was not sure, if once I did in fact join Ben in the fact that I was going to go live out in the wild. Besides, I also felt that my two legs did not love my back at all, any longer either, which also hurt me quite a bit to even think on that fact.

It was a fact, and I knew it, which only made the pain feel even more bitter than the time before. I almost wanted to cry, but I held in the tears. These were just two legs, and I knew there was nothing at all that I should be sad, or hurt about. It was not like I had fallen in love with an actual cat.

I shook my head, as I shook those thoughts from out of my head, and I then lifted my head up to Ben at the same time as well, who I could see had his eyes squinted at me, as if I had been doing some thing highly suspicious. I blinked a few times, as I was not sure what was even going on around me.

It was what again? Oh yes... I was leaving my home... I let out quite a loud sigh as the same time as well, as I looked around once again. After a few moments longer how ever, I turned my head back over to Ben, as I shook off any sort of sad thoughts that I was having right now, as I then began to speak up to him.

"No... This is not my home..." I began to say to Ben, as I saw him blink a few times, as I could tell that he was quite a bit shocked at the same time too. I knew he was not expecting that to come from me, and to be frank, neither was I either. I shook my head at the same moment in time as well, and I then continued to speak to Ben. "My home is out in the wild Ben..."

I said to him, as I saw a bit of a blank look on his face for quite a bit of some time, which was not normal for him, but it also was not the first time that he had done so today either. I knew that he was having a lot of thoughts right now, and he was also trying to give me some good advice as well.

I blinked a few times, as I was tempted to dip my head to the ground once again, and let my head go back in to the same deep thoughts that I had been having not too long before now. I knew that we were wasting a whole lot of time how ever, as I was not sure as to how far away the place was that he was trying to take me.

I had never been told about it by any cat ever before, which was straight up a little bit risky to me, as I wondered if this could perhaps be a trap. I shook my head at the same time as well how ever, as I knew that Ben would not do some thing such as that, as we had been good friends for a while.

What good would that do him at all any ways? I let out quite the loud sigh, as I knew that Ben had heard it as well, though it seemed like he was just going to ignore it, as he kept the same blank look on his face for just a little bit longer, until he locked eyes with me, and he then nodded to me at the same time too, as it was clear that he had enough time to think, and he was now ready to talk.

I blinked just a few times as well, as if I did not want to hear what it was that he had to say to me. I shook off all of those thoughts how ever, as after a little bit longer, I then nodded back to my friend too, as I waited for him to talk. He stood there for just a little bit longer, until he did in fact finally begin to speak up to me, and I listened to what it was that he had to say to me at the exact same time as well.

"Alright then... Just follow my lead..."