[43] In a Dark Place

I hugged my pillow tightly, unable to breathe. My lungs were empty and dry; they felt as cold as ice, but simultaneously as scorching hot as fire. My head was burning up, and everything around me went blurry. My nose felt like an ice land and a desert. My eyes were swollen. I sat on my bed, rocking back and forth with the lights off, crying... crying...

I couldn't distinguish between the left side of the room and the right... everything looked exactly the same.

Flashbacks crossed my mind, of times Ethan and I had spent together... him making stupid jokes, me criticizing him. I threw myself into the guilt pit over every wrong I'd ever done to him.