The Beautiful and Damned

There was a quote Oleah had read somewhere before in her many travels, it said "When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it's not.". It had taken Oleah twenty seven hours, fifty four minutes, and thirteen seconds (she liked to keep track of time) to understand exactly what the author meant.

And she felt bad. Not for the people who grew up in a burning house, no. She felt bad for the people who hasn't realized the world's cruelty, the people who hasn't experienced what it felt to crash and burn.

You see, Oleah wasn't like any of the other children she'd seen.

She doesn't play (or at least not in the way other kids do), she liked to make every second worth it by doing something productive, learning something new. She doesn't cry, she doesn't see the point in crying when you could be using the time you spent suffering by making things right (or making the people who hurt you pay for what they did). She doesn't ask others for help, she learned early on that people expects something in return when you ask them for something (instead she learned how to make them fear, because fear makes people more agreeable). She doesn't cower, because cowering makes you look weak, and predators feasts on their prey's weaknesses (she's experienced the addicting high of standing over a person cowering in fear, she hopes she doesn't experience it again).

Oleah's hypothetical house has been burning for as long as she remembers, but unlike the quote, she already knows the world outside wasn't on fire.

"Does Castiel look prettier today than yesterday, or is it just me?" Constantine's voice broke Oleah's musings as he sighed dreamily while stabbing the life out of his pasta(?) She wasn't sure at this point. Oleah felt bad for the pasta, it was mangled beyond recognition.

Oleah sought out Castiel's trio, it wasn't hard, his friends are often the center of attention. The comedic relief, Oleah thought. Castiel was a rather small guy, specially when compared to guys like Shaun with his broad shoulders, strong chiseled jaw, and muscular everything. He had a slender body, a tiny waist, and a very pale complexion which gives him that trademark delicate look. He's also on the short side so really, Oleah understood why Con's salivating over the guy. He's the human embodiment of the word pretty.

"No Con, he's his usual blond self." Sienna said with an exasperated smile, sipping on her questionable sweet drink which is as red as her ginger hair, "You should really stop staring, or else you'd start stalking him too, if you haven't already. Remember Cilix in fifth grade?" her cornflower blue eyes shined mischievously at this recollection.

Cilix Trimaran, who can forget that guy? Oleah's eyes moved from Castiel to his friend sitting beside him upon the mention of the name like clockwork. She's been watching Cilix since the first time they met back in first grade, he was so small back then, and his honest to god blinding as fuck smile unnerved her. Something must be seriously wrong with his smile, Oleah thought, no smile should be that bright. And if she kept on staring partly because of said smile and his enchanting dual colored eyes (one is a weird shade between blue and purple and the other is a swirling golden color that she swore can suck one's soul upon direct eye contact) and soft looking curly hair, no one has to know.

But unlike the guy, Oleah knows how to watch people inconspicuously. Cilix Trimaran has the discretion of a fumbling fawn who's just learning to walk.

"Was that when he thought I was summoning a demon or that time he thought I was founding a cult?" Honestly, it was a wonder how he and Shaun managed to be so high in the ranking. It's Castiel, Oleah decided, it's the only logical explanation.

She watched in slight amusement as Sienna suddenly snort and ended up coughing as her drink came up her nose. Oleah just calmly hand her a tissue as Con eyed her in barely concealed disgust.

"First, ew Sienna, that's so gross. Second, I don't mind stalking so long as I get to see his pretty pouty lips every second of every day. And third, Oleah, dear, you were trying to raise a dragon back then, that's equally horrifying in my opinion." He emphasized his words by ticking each point by a finger, rolling his electric blue eyes heavenward at the mention of Kirby. Kirby was a nice dragon, he had small teeth and a cute little purple tongue.

"In Oleah's defense, Kirby doesn't breath fire." Sienna said once she'd cleaned her face, still wheezing in uncontrolled laughter.

"Right, because that's so much better than his venom secreting tongue!" Con slammed both his palms on the table in indignation, belatedly realizing how the loud noise drew some curious glances from the nearby table. Good thing it's lunch time, and the cafe's always full of students at this time of day, so the noise didn't catch that much attention.

"Don't forget the talons." Sienna added unhelpfully.

"That's all ancient history."

"It literally happened three years ago." Con's learning the deadpan voice, Oleah's proud of him.

"I was not the me three years ago."

She and Con stared blankly at each other for all of three seconds before he burst out in laughter, Oleah hid half a smile behind her glass of water, content on watching her two friends die of asphyxiation through excessive laughter. What a way to go right?

But watching these two laugh, being the reason they can laugh like that, it lightens something terrifying in Oleah's chest. Because if before the only thing she knows were the harsh winds of winter, that her blood runs cold and her bones ache. That she wonders, sometimes, if it's better to remain unmoving than to continue feeling so hollow. But now she experienced the warm breeze of summer, with its clear blue skies and the everlasting glow of sunlight and the bloom of scented flowers. And she wonders, on times when she felt too big for her skin, when she felt like a foreigner on her own body. Will they bring her back? With their smiles and their touch and the soft sound of their voice, will that be enough?

Because the world may be cruel, but it's also beautiful. And Oleah wonders if all things beautiful must always be so fleeting, like the earth had no way of holding their feet on the ground. She looked at her friends and hopes not, he hopes these two would stay.