The Pink Pound

I was just thinking about my school days. I was raised in Virginia and got pregnant real young, It's almost funny because daddy was trying to beat Cydney from ruining my life. My life isn't ruined, I think I'm blown by what happened.

This bitch really hung me. 

X

I think I'm retarded. I always try to find the wonder in everything. Because that's what school tells us. But maybe it's all TV shit. 

The world is amazing. I gave birth, and I was fucked up by it all. At the age of six. I had two boys, Warr and Real. 

I recall that daddy wanted the best pregnancy and he kept rearranging Reals' name. My baby is Real Hush Chain, But he wanted the twins to have similar names,, It was like telling myself that what I went through was real,

She put a rope around my neck. I felt the rope and I just thought how could she do this to a child? I was six years old. I tried breathing through my nose but i couldn't get air. I would sniff. I felt the air try to squeeze through my throat and my chest felt heavy, I said, I can't die like this. This is stupid.

I rubbed the rope around my throat. I moved my hand elsewhere and pulled the strands out until it was thin,

The freedom was so foreign. I couldn't believe that it worked. I felt my neck, it was off. I looked at the rope and I stared at the part I had plucked. I really did that. And I had a malicious thought, That was too easy. 

And I was right. It was fair too easy, nobody was around. I was inside the school alone, and I was nervous to leave, but it's easy. I went to the front door of the school, and it had no chains. Cydney didn't lock up the school. 

The event is mesmerizing. To be kidnapped and tormented was hypnotic, I was six, and now I have big titties and look at everything as a source of comedy[. That is the true definition of Gothic minus the gay shit. 

Because her stupid daughter died and she's a hoe. My ass gets tight everytime I think of it. "Mama." 

"What?" her fucking kids are calling me mama now. I am better. And prostitutes are told they can't be prostitutes and a mother at the same damn time. In a funny sense a hoe could be a mother to her own bra. That's the gothic humor. "Your eyes are catching fire." says Nyama. These things... are children. What made Cydney eat shit? Crack? A very typical answer. 

I found a video type in the car that shows this sad little girl getting molested and Cydney is like, 'Your gay now'. 

I'm about to have a heart attack.

---

When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there.

Deuteronomy 18:9

"Where are we going?" asks Nyama. "We have to get away from the house." I say. "It's called Ghana Heir Hilt. I was born there and fell out my mama virgina. She threw me down the stairs, but I am still alive."

I look at him with wide eyes. "What is wrong with you?" I question.

"Ok. I give, I was born with a penis."

"You are a boy. It's supposed to be there." I exclaim. "I don't think so because mine is so small it goes pop and it sticks out and I don't know what that means."

"Nyama."

"To be honest my real name is Clarence Josh Washington the third."

"The third?" I blink.

"I was born during the first May season on the eight. Mama told me I came from the moon. But not the first moon. Daddy owes the second moon and we have a black moon that makes night morning. And sometimes the sky is purple and it makes me itchy and I found out that I'm allgeric to purple because my knees don't point in the same direction."

I blink. "Nyama what is your name?" I sheer at him. "Jimmy-- no." he pokes his lip. " Carl Dal Anna or sometimes just caramel."

"Caramel doesn't have a D." I say.

"Mama does." he looks at me. We stare at each other and this child is getting uglier by the minute. I swear his nose moved to the left and his lips inflated. "Well..." his scratches his head with his left hand that is cocked back to his chest. He sighs and pouts, "It's nasty.'

I assume he wants to say I'm pretty, He comes through his lips is a direct sentence, I mean he spoke English. "I had to crap and I did." he says.

"That's good."

"It was. Because I remember mama hit me out of no where and..." I hate him pausing. "She showed me her dick and..." he looks to the left and spreads his eyes. "It was hairy, like daddy's and she was like... do you want to suck it. I tried not to look but she forced my head and she grabbed her dick and chest."

"Oh... shit...uh... Nyama let's get far from the island. You said this is Ghana Heir Hilt,"

"It is. Daddy jacks off a lot, but not on sundays because he has to pray to his God."

"God?"

"Asphy'Hod. He's this snake that daddy killed because he killed him but the snake kept moving and when daddy grabbed it, Asphy'Hod bit daddy though he had half a body."

"Sam?"

"Yeah, but he wasn't always Saw he was Adam, then he was Seth, and Nishant. But he always used to be Amos, and Yossef. He was born different. Daddy had three legs after the thing happen. He used to be Glen, Farrell, uh..." he smacks his lips in thought. "Erwin, and he had a big farm with dead people in it and named them. Wait..."

"Don't say anyore." I hold my forehead. I feel sick...

"Oh!" he yells/Let's go to the new islands. "Carta rec keg! You see daddy prays a lot. He also fucks himself with a custom dildo that has a sheep's head" I'm listening, and then it happens. Nyama stuns me and leaps my way to smack me straight in the left of my eye. He keeps swinging and he starts yelling so loud he bleeds from his nose.

I close my eyes and let him ball up his right fist as he hammers the side of my face. He delivers a modest blow to my forehead and I have a headache. I bare my fangs and hold his arms above his head. I strike him in the face and his top lip falls off. "What the fuck!"

"I ate shit! It was nasty good. I mixed it with sticks and pee-pee. Real good pee-pee. It was pee from a mouse and the pee-pee got on the boo-boo and it made it wet, but I like wet shit because I get pretty." he breathes heavily and his bottom lip covers his top. "Kill me!

"Nyama what is wrong?"

"Why?" he exclaims as his eyes swell "He grabbed it and she... she... what the... why me?" his face contorts.

"Nyama..."

"If you have any shred of decency you would--" I think about a bullet in his forehead.

He's quiet.

And eyes piece through his nipples. They blink at me and face upward like his natural eyes. My life is hard. 

*

Carta rec keg

I looked in the glove compartment and found a tape recorder. There was a tape. I played it and heard moaning,

/It's little./

/You said mine was little./

/It is! Rape me and him both. At the same time./

/I told myself I would never do that again. I don't like it."/

/I like it. Nyama is cute with cornrows./

/Cidney, you are sick. Nyama is your son./

/I said I wanted to be a pedophile for halloween. Children love pedophiles./

The tape ended with Sam cursing in a african tongue. I found a map, it looked like static frozen. I wiped the static off and it cleared the map. The ghetto, Locucts looks different.

Nyama is dead. I put him in the truck, sometimes that bangs. I can't take him out. 

Locucts is changing. Is it because of the prayers? I'm on this island and I have to drive off it. How?

-

Nyama is in the truck and I have to deal with the fact I shot a child. Ironic. I have kids of my own but I don't know where they are. 

House of Tomorrow

I can't keep living here. "Now, understand. I have said this like eleven times. Nobody wants you." says Ms. Holloway." You were born, and now you live in the mub. You are mud children."

I blink. I look at Ade, and he's biting his lip again. I look at Ms. Holloway, I stare at Ade again. Today they are teaching us about sex. "Now, moving on to the intercourse lesson. I need the boys to the left and the girls to the right." she directs, and I get off the floor and move to the right of the room.

I live in the House of Tomorrow Orphanage. My name is Mojisola. That's what they gave me and I remembered yesterday that my name is actually Jaynie Mccall. I get a whooping if I say it, so now I pretend like I never heard it. "Everybody say hello to Miss Morounkola." she starts clapping and a few kids join inn even Ade.

I look to the left and the brown door made from wood comes open. A woman in a raggedy dress comes in and collar made out of white feathers from the chicken in the backyard. She fans herself with a human hand that has a stick through it. "Hello..." she looks at the children and I can't help but see how big her chin is. 

"Do you know what sex is?" she fluffers her eyes. "Sex is beautiful." she waves the hand like a wand. "Sex is a gift from Ashy'hod. He is the stank from the vagina and young girls should always listen to their vaginas for it tells them ery early what they really want," she fans herself and I look at my own vagina. 

She throws the fan in the direction of another girl with short nappy hair. "What does your coochie say to you."

"Nothing..." she says.

"Wrong!" she puts the hand next to her side. "I am the speak of the coohie. I say what Ashy, the sneak from the vagina really says. He wants sex."

I look at Ade, nodding. I slap his arm. "Stop." I whisper. "Sex is beautiful children." she yells. "But the being." she points up. "Does not want you to have sex. He says... you are too young. But sex is beautiful! Have sex with your neighbor. For it says in the Black Book, love thy neighbor. Have sex with your neighbor, let your neighbor eat your coochie. Let him or her feat on the plate. 

"What..." 

"Women carry the plate and men..." she shakes her head. "They do not have a plate."

I hug my knees and squeeze my thighs together. "Men have a Bone. The Bone is a piece of meat. Listen..." she owes a serious appearance. "Stare at his Bone. Hold your mouth open and close your eyes. The bone is a gift that Ashy'hod created. He made the genders. Girls are a line and boys are angles, It is our duty as women to keep the men straight. Men should not be gay but women are there for breeding," Miss Morounkola bites her lip. "Open your legs for them. Let them feast or be raped..."

Ade claps his hands and then the most terrifying thing happens, he stands up and speaks. "Yes Sister Miss Morounkola. Men cannot be gay and I seen the error of my ways. There is nothing attractive about another man's jimmy. I am a sinner."

"What have you done boy."

"I kissed another angle. I said I loved him and my father beat me. I engaged in Bone and the foul taste on my tongue has corrected me. I do not lust after men. I want pussy!" He stops and tears leak from his eyes,

"Ade..."

"I have sinned and my lips laid on another angle."

Miss Morounkola nods. "You will be reborn. Now girls rememeber, you have a line and girls can be gay or straight. But men, they have to mate with us and together we can make the next generation."

After the speech was done. We all returned to our rooms and Ekundayo took his pants off in the room. "My Bone is straight." he held it in his hands. "Girls, look at it." I'm ashamed to say I did. "My Bone is black and small yet strong. As I hold it, I pray that another boy, an angle, destroys my power."

He started jacking off as he stood next to his bed. He yelled like a wild animal. "Praise!" he panted. "Go Ekundayo . Go!" applauded Ifedapo, :You are weird. You can't touch me!" Ekundayo yells. "You are gay!"

"I'm not gay!" states Ifedapo. Ifedapo is white with blue eyes. "You are gay! You want to steal my power!" Ekundayo shouts and add some speed. I hide under the covers. He moans loudly and starts a chant about girls.

"Big breast! Vagina! I love it!" he stomps his feet and lifts his head up in victory. I want to sleep.

The door cracks open, a big back man with fangs and a tail walts in. "Good. Disciple." he nods. "He is gay!" he points at Ifedapo. "I'm not gay!"

"He's staring at me please myself. He is gay Elder Teniola."

His name is Phil. His brother is Kyle. My name is Jaynie. Kyle screams and I hear Elder Teniola stomp towards Kyle. He's threating him and I hear his zipper come undone. I hear crying and Phil is still with himself.

"I'm not gay! I'm not gay!" 

I try to wrap the blank around my feet.