Under Pressure

"I hope you're able to get some sleep tonight. Tomorrow is going to be difficult, but I promise I'll stand by your side, Kit," Charles had said to Katherine as their dinner had come to an end.

The kindness and heart in his eyes was apparent, and Katherine was grateful for the man who wanted to be her friend.

As much as she wanted Jasper to be the one to stand by her tomorrow, and as much as she wished it was his shoulder she could cry on, she knew she could not risk it. Even with her being the Queen, it would be dangerous for anyone to find out just how much Jasper meant to her.

It would compromise both her safety and his. The last thing Katherine wanted was for whoever the spy was to realize that they were each other's weaknesses. They still were not one hundred percent sure that there even was a spy, but Katherine was not going to take any risks when it came to the man she loved.

Katherine would do anything for Jasper, and if keeping him safe meant that she had to settle for Charles' comfort during her father's funeral, then that is what she would do.

"Goodnight, Charles," Katherine said in a stoic manner.

He gave her a tight smile before he asked, "Can I walk you to your room at least? I want to make sure you get back there safely."

"That won't be necessary, my guard will be here shortly to walk me back, but thank you."

With that, Katherine nodded at the guard who was standing by the doors and listening to their conversation. The guard knew that nod meant that he could call Jasper for her, which is what he immediately turned around to do for his Queen.

Charles' eyebrows furrowed together with that statement, and it caused him to ask her, "The blonde one who is always around? You two seem close."

Katherine knew that he probably meant nothing by the remark, but Charles noticing Jasper in any capacity made her nervous. She tried to hide her anxiousness by casually shrugging her shoulders and saying "He's been my personal guard since we were young."

As if on cue, Jasper arrived before them and bowed only toward Katherine, as if he was trying to make Charles feel invisible. Without so much as a glance towards Charles, he spoke, "Your Majesty, can I escort you back to your room?"

Katherine tried to hide her smile and amusement. Jasper never acted so official in front of her, not even when she had her first meeting as Queen this morning. Honestly, she thought it was hilarious because it was so unlike him.

"I'll take that as my prompt to leave," Charles said with a nervous laugh before he looked at Katherine. "Goodnight, Kit." He quickly turned on his heels and made his exit, also paying no attention to Jasper.

Jasper's face, which had been smug a moment ago, turned to something that almost looked like jealousy and malice combined. He watched for a moment as Charles disappeared around the corner before he turned back to Katherine. "Kit?" he asked in annoyance.

Once again trying to hide her true feelings, Katherine shrugged her shoulders and said, "He has called me that since we were kids." When the emotions in Jasper's face did not change, she grabbed his arm and said, "Let's go to bed, I'm tired."

He sighed and looked around the room to make sure the other guards had left with Charles before he planted a kiss on her cheek. "Alright, let's go."

Much to Katherine's surprise, Jasper did not ask about her dinner with the prince. She hoped that they would just be able to enjoy the rest of their night together, so she was grateful that Charles did not end up being a topic of discussion.

They laid in her bed together and quietly cuddled for a bit, neither wanting to talk about what the morning would bring, before Jasper was the first to doze off. As much as Katherine tried to fall asleep, knowing that her father's funeral and her coronation were tomorrow was too much stress for her to bear, and it made it impossible for her to relax.

When morning finally did come, Katherine could feel the bags under her eyes before she got the chance to look at them in the mirror. When she finally saw them, the purple hints in her skin were worse than she imagined.

Jasper could sense her anxiousness, so he did his best to comfort her by holding her hand, or kissing her shoulders, or even brushing her hair out of her face, but his tenderness towards her seemed to go unnoticed. She was in her own head, trying to hold herself together as much as she could.

While she bathed that morning, Jasper left for a couple of minutes to go get dressed in a tuxedo before he returned to her room. She dressed herself in a black dress and black heels for the funeral, and gave Jasper a simple nod when she was ready to leave her room.

"I'll be right behind you the whole time, Katie. If you need me, just look my way," he had told her while they made their way outside to the limousine that would take her to the cathedral.

They sat next to each other in the limo in complete silence, but Jasper continued to hold Katherine's hand in support and in hopes that it would soothe her just enough so that she would not be too distressed when they arrived and he would have to let her go on her own.

Her mind felt blank, and she felt as if she was just going through the motions all morning. She could barely remember waking up and getting dressed, and she had no idea how long she was in the limo for.

Katherine felt so numb that she did not even register that Jasper had been holding her hand the whole ride. When the limo came to a stop, she stayed put, and Jasper had to be the one to give her hand a squeeze as he pulled her to stand up.

She blinked a couple of times, coming back to the present, and she felt a plethora of emotions start to swarm her. Completely overwhelmed, she sat back down before Jasper could get her out of the limo, and pleaded with him, "I don't know if I can do this."

Sadness, anxiousness, anger, desperation, loneliness, and denial hit her like a ton of bricks, and she gripped at her throat that felt like it was closing up.

Jasper quickly pulled the limo door shut to give her privacy, and he kneeled before her and grabbed her hands that were scratching at her neck to prevent her from hurting herself.

"Katie, look at me," he said in a calm yet forceful voice.

She continued to try to suck in air, and tried to look where Jasper's voice had come from, but quickly noticed that she could not see through all of the tears that had clouded her vision.

Katherine closed her eyes tightly and tried to blink them away as she gasped for more air. She heard the limo door open again, but was too focused on trying to breathe to care what was going on.

"What happened?" she heard a voice laced with worry ask.

"Panic attack," Jasper answered. "If you wait outside, I'll make sure she comes out when she's ready."

Suddenly, Katherine felt another set of arms come around her body. She knew it was not Jasper because he was still holding her hands down on her lap.

When she felt like she was being brought up onto someone's lap, Katherine opened her eyes and saw that it was Charles who was holding her close to him as Jasper was still kneeled in front of them.

"You may go. Thank you for looking after her," she heard Charles tell Jasper once she was completely wrapped in his arms.

Katherine could barely process what was happening, but she felt even more distress when she watched as Jasper made his way out of the limo. He turned and looked back at her one more time with a broken-hearted look on his face before he left and closed the door behind him.