guilt

I was on the way heading in guest room clutching the tray strongly.I had no gut to facing her. I didn't know how I am going to answer her about morning.she hate sushi and due to her she got fainted.She will never let me speak again.What mo will think.

I opened the door.She was awoke and leaning on pillow lying on bed.Her eyes were moist and finding me it even got moisten.she try to hide her tear .I took few step close to bed and put the tray.

Do you also think that I am not good mother.

Aunt gaga questioned me quickly as I was about to sit on chair.Her voice was heavier and it sound like she had been having trouble in breathing.

You were there whenever mo need you.I answered her back.

This time she got more depressed.

when mo born.I gifted her to my mother.I really didn't want her to create any scar on my reputation.I wasn't even wanted give birth.It was my mother who said killing foetus will make me suffer whole life.she insisted me to give birth and she will take all responsibility .I did what she said.

growing up ,her face looked exactly like her father.Same brown eyes,curly hair...That reminded me of that bastard.My hate toward her grew more and more.I even couldn't face her around me for single minute.she grew up with her grandmother.I sometime went frankfrut to visit my mother but I made sure she was not around me.

Her eyes were full with tear .

But it seemed like mom always tell her good side of me.Whenever she saw me,she used to give me a smile.When,I got the home.She often waited me right next to the entrance.holding bunch of flower.she was expecting me to give her same.while,getting out from the car she used to get closer and said

"mommy,grandma said that you love the rose."

she extended her hand toward me.Her hand were bleeding due to thrown but her face was smiling with sparkle.

"no need."I headed to home.

She waited me to call her but I never really did that.At night,she used to request me to sleep with me.My mother was forcing me a lot to do what mo want so sometime I agreed with her.while sleeping ,she asked me to tell her fairytale but I used to reject her.All night she used to play with my hair .she wanted me to hug her ..she wanted me to kiss her on her forehead.she wanted me to comb her hair,she wanted me to drove off to her school,she wanted me to attend parents meeting....

Saying this her voice got heavier. she was grabbing the blanket very tightly.

She used to call me every night to say me good night.She often send me the picture she drew of me. while I were in alas ,she often messaged me asking about my health but all her messaged were seen but never answered back.

Aunt,mo never really care about these.She really love you.

After her medicine I got in my room.I was tired with all thing.I down my head on pillow.