EMOTIONALLY PARALYSED

What's happening to me?

I cannot feel.

The feelings that one should feel

The pain is so intense

And it has taken away my happiness

I feel like someone else

This is not me

I know its not

Them emotions i used to feel

Is disappearing into thin air

I do not want to fake my

Smile and laughter

Cause people will think

I am being a lie

The light and the joy

Does not seem much to me

With all the pain

I have been through

I want to feel, love

I want to know what its like

To be living the real me

Although the real me

Is even more painful

If only they could see

What i have become

A monster, i guess

They say, they are scared of me

They don't want to be my friend

I ran away from myself many times

Cause i was scared of myself

And now

It feels like

I am emotionally paralysed