A fool for nobody

"Cohen!" Arice tried to stop Sherdan, but Martin and Sean decided to step forward. Both prevented Arice from getting in between Sherdan and Friedde's conversation.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Let go " Arice's face had long twisted in annoyance. He glared at Sean and the latter looked at him with an incredulous expression.

"No--Arice, what is wrong with you?" Sean tried to prove a point, but the latter's struggles to break free did not cease. 

Sherdan glanced at Arice and realized he must have been acting odd for a reason. If it was a reason related to Friedde's attempted suicide--then he would hear him out, just so he could finally forget this matter altogether.

"Do you know the reason then?" Sherdan asked Arice the moment he turned around. Friedde was alarmed by this and tried to get up, but the pain in his body prevented him from doing so. Arice saw Friedde's state and clicked his tongue. The idiotic man begged him to not say a word. How could he then? 

It was all because of what he saw. Because of that bruises in Friedde's body, he once again remembered unpleasant things.

He kept his mouth closed and his lips tight--despite his earlier protests, in the end, he had no voice to defend Friedde.

"If you're acting up again, then stop. This is not a time for your plays." Sherdan closed his room for further conversations and turned his back on the annoyed Arice.

"If you can't give me the answer I want, let me seek it myself." 

Irritated by the fact that he truly had no place to meddle in the two's affair, Arice broke free with all his strength and the other two who were holding him back were pushed aside in a rough way.

Sean fell on the floor, but managed to respond quickly to minimize the damage of the upcoming impact, by grabbing ahold of a solid foundation beside him. Martin, on the other hand, was in a slightly better state. 

Despite the fact that Sean had tried to control his fall, he still failed to go unscathed. After being smashed against the ground, a portion of his arms near his elbow began to turn purplish.

"Ackkk-"Arice snapped out of his state when he heard Sean's yelp of pain. Although he was still far from calm, he decided to tend to Sean first.

"Take him out for aide and leave us" Sherdan, who watched all of that unfold, was worried about Sean, but he had no plans to leave the conversation just to accompany his friend. 

Arice glared his way and the two made everyone in the room uncomfortable. Arice had been butting heads with Sherdan since earlier, and since Sherdan was never the type to back out, the way to reconciliation was still an impossible feat.

"Martin!" Arice's sudden call made Martin flinch. The latter does not have any interest in involving himself in the two's fight.

"I'm not picking sides," Martin abruptly said, stopping any impending misunderstanding. He truly has no say in this fight at all.

Sure, he was baffled by Arice' out of character actions and Sherdan's rudeness towards Friedde when they used to be as tight as a knot--but that doesnt equate to anything.  He had no intention of asking again or making anyone uncomfortable.

"Where's your head? What picking side? Help me carry Sean." Though he still had that grumpy expression that indicated how much he despised backing down, it appeared Arice wouldn't drag this fight out for long.

 Martin realized he thought wrong and sighed in relief. At the very least, he wouldn't trouble himself picking over his friends. He went to them to help.

Sean tried to reject Arice's offer, but the other turned deaf to his words and carried him nonetheless.

Before they left, Arice glanced at Sherdan and at Friedde's body, now covered with the hospital gown. The scars and new bruises he had seen behind those clothes when he stepped in were something he would never, ever mistake for something else. 

'Clever. They even did it on hidden areas.' The person who did that to Friedde reminded Arice of his deceased abusive mother.

Those scars--he had seen them before and had received them before in his own body. Those heinous acts have left a mark on him to this day. Those scars weren't self inflicted. They were scars you'd get when someone assaulted you.

If Sherdan was oblivious on these things about Friedde, then he'd for sure...

"...regret it" 

Friedde heard him and felt anxious. He subtly shook his head to prevent Arice, but the latter ignored him.

"I'm not going to tell him Loyde," Arice bore a hole in the oblivious man. He wouldn't speak a word of what he had seen. If Sherdan was truly unaware of this---then he'd be the one aware.

He never liked Friedde--but that doesn't mean he wouldn't side with him. 

"I won't tell this man anything," Arice repeated. Sherdan stared back at Arice without faltering. The two men weren't in a physical fight, but the tension between them far exceeded raw violence.

"I'd like to see him regret it in the end" 

Arice was irritated by Sherdan's idiocity. The guy was oblivious to Friedde's matter and the latter doesn't seem to have any intention of involving Sherdan. With this idiotic cycle of receiving and inflicting pain, Arice wouldn't be surprised if, at the end of the road, the two could no longer salvage their relationship.

"You're going to regret this, Sherdan." 

'What would he regret? Was it even worth the thought?' Sherdan doubted Arice's claims. He no longer loved Friedde enough to regret anything.

"Rest assured I won't, Hones" 

When the three had left the room, Sherdan went back to his previous business.

He stared at Friedde. The reason aside, he didn't even know whether he could trust if this was a charade or not. After all, Friedde had no reason to kill himself. Even if he did break up with him, Friedde loved himself more than he loved him. He wasn't so valuable to Friedde that he'd quit his own life just because he left.

It couldn't be because of love--nor because of his family. Afterall, Friedde came from a normal and wealthy family. Sherdan had seen Friedde's parents once and they both looked like decent persons. He finds it hard to believe that Friedde's family was the reason behind this.

Friends--couldn't possibly be included in the possible reasons either, since he was Friedde's only friend.

Study? Impossible.

With those options crossed out, there was only one thing left on his mind.

"Are you acting up?" Sherdan came up with a conclusion and in an instant, disgust crossed his face.

There was no trace of kindness nor care in his voice. Sherdan was not even a bit interested in the guy's wellbeing. He came here to solve his confusion. Nothing more, nothing less.

Friedde shook his head. His chest heaved as he tried to steady his breath and as if it would change Sherdan's perception of him, Friedde tried to force out a smile.

"D-dan Dan, I wouldn't do that..You know me..." Friedde tried to get a hold of Sherdan's arms. 

"I don't" The words that came out of Sherdan's mouth and his hands that avoided Friedde's hold made the later stop all his motions.

Friedde awkwardly laughed and wiped his face dry. "I suddenly want to rest...let's talk tommorrow? Okay? Please?" 

He knew this would be the end--he knew that what Sherdan would say next would put a close on everything he tried to treasure. He tried to stop it--but things that are supposed to happen would happen, regardless of how many times one wishes otherwise.

"I don't know you anymore" Sherdan's words had no intent to hurt him. That fact made this more difficult to bear.

"That's ridiculous---"

"Stop acting pitiful and answer me! Why are you doing this?" If Friedde thought this would faze him, then he was gravely mistaken.

Friedde's mouth opened to defend himself, but whenever realization dawns, it would instantly close again. Sherdan failed to notice the quivers of his mouth whenever he tries to defend himself, as he was too caught up in his own beliefs. 

If that was the case, then...

"What, I can't even fool you now?" Friedde wiped his tears and laughed. He move out of his bed, even curling up a little from the sudden struck of pain, but he forced himself to stand up straight. He could feel all the bruises and wounds all over his body, heating up like it was about to burn his flesh to a crisp.

It was painful, but he endured. It was awful, but he refused to cry again.

"I tried to kill myself for you. Can't you see how much I love you?" His face went red as if it was about to explode. The veins on his eyes didn't go unnoticed either.

Sherdan saw Friedde's true face and confirmed that he had been acting to gain pity. Just like that, the years that were shared together were overwritten with hate.

"I'm the only one who would accept you Cohen, only I." Friedde sounded crazed, just like he had always been.

"I'm the only one! Me! Everyone hates gays! If you come back to me, I'd still accept you. " 

It was the same phrase, over and over again. It was that same scenario, over and over again.

"Come back to me? Hmm? I'd really kill myself this time. I'd kill myself." Sherdan pushed him away when he tried to advance. He was disgusted, utterly disgusted. It was naive of him to believe Friedde was truly in trouble.

"Then die"

'If only you did that, instead of wrecking me.'