positive vibes

We're not negative Nancies. In fact, as the authors of this post, we strongly believe in the undeniable power of positivity.

While there is certainly something to be said for having a sunny disposition on life, it's also possible to overdose on the sickeningly sweet nectar of platitudes such as "everything is awesome!"

This blog post will address the dark side of the "positive vibes" trend (called toxic positivity), how its overuse causes harm and leads to the very suffering it aims to quash.

"Everything worthwhile in life is won through surmounting the associated negative experience. Any attempt to escape the negative, to avoid it or quash it or silence it, only backfires. The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering. The avoidance of struggle is a struggle. The denial of failure is a failure. Hiding what is shameful is itself a form of shame.

Mark Manson, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

What is Toxic PositivityToxic Positivity Definition

We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

Just like anything done in excess, when positivity is used to cover up or silence the human experience, it becomes toxic. By disallowing the existence of certain feelings, we fall into a state of denial and repressed emotions. The truth is, humans are flawed. We get jealous, angry, resentful, and greedy. Sometimes life can just flat out suck. By pretending that we are "positive vibes all day," we deny the validity of a genuine human experience.

Signs of Toxic Positivity

Below are some common expressions and experiences of toxic positivity to help you recognize how it shows up in everyday life.

Hiding/Masking your true feelings

Trying to "just get on with it" by stuffing/dismissing an emotion(s)

Feeling guilty for feeling what you feel

Minimizing other people's experiences with "feel good" quotes or statements

Trying to give someone perspective (e.g., "it could be worse") instead of validating their emotional experience

Shaming or chastising others for expressing frustration or anything other than positivity

Brushing off things that are bothering you with an "It is what it is"

Positive thinking is an optimistic state of mind, which sees the bright side of life. A positive frame of mind brings more harmony and happiness, improves relationships, and attracts success into your life. It is a mindset that you can build up.

We have collected here a selection of the best and most popular articles on this topic from our website. We hope you enjoy reading them.

Positive thinking is a mental and emotional attitude of expecting good and favorable results, and not getting discouraged when plans do not proceed as expected. It means trying over again and not accepting defeat.

It is an attitude of focusing on the good and positive in a situation, and not on the negative. With this frame of mind, you don't accept defeat, and do not allow anything negative to affect your mood and state of mind.

A positive thinking person focuses more on the good in people, not on the bad.

Success ConsciousnessMenu

1. Gratitude

Every morning that you wake up, you need to be thankful for what you have around you. You need to be thankful for everything that is there in the present and doesn't think about the past or the future. If you're thankful for the present, the universe will give you more reasons to be thankful for. The best way to do this is as a form of exercise either the first thing in the morning or the last thing in the night. It's great to start your mornings on a positive note and when you're doing it at night, you're thanking the universe for the beautiful day that you've had today. Start practising gratitude by being thankful for the simpler things in life; the minute you do that, the bigger things only become easier.

2. Surround yourself with positive people

"Your vibe attracts your tribe." Try to build a group and accumulate positive energies around you. Have you ever noticed that you've gotten into a room and felt some sort of negative/bad energies? That's not just something you're thinking, it's a fact! People emanate energies and the energies around us are the ones we attract back into our lives. Whether it's the staff that's working for you/family/friends/people you meet; the more you attract positive people, you'll see that the universe will bring you more of it and the negative ones will go away. You must remember that you're the average of 5 people you spend most of your time with. Our behaviour, our thoughts, our patterns mirror those around us so choose carefully who you allow into your circle.

3. Physiology and body language

It's scientifically proven that your body language cuts out 80% of the negativity into the energy around you. Say if you're in a meeting and you're feeling low and have shoulders drooping, automatically your energy is low. Whereas if you walk into a room with your shoulders pulled back and your head held up high, you're walking in with a gust of energy. Try it out scientifically, even if it's right now. Just keep your shoulders upright and your head held high and look straight into the eyes of what you're doing and you'll instantly feel so positive about everything. Your environment/the people around you will not bother you as much as they did when your physiology/body language was low and down. This is a fabulous theory to follow to get onto the positive side of things.

4. The silver lining

Always keep your eyes fixated on this no matter what the situation is. Whatever it is, there's always a silver lining. It could be a bad day, bad energy, anything negative in general. If you look deep enough, you'll always find something positive, no matter what the gravity of the situation is. Training yourself to look for the lesson and finding the bright spot not only eases out the burden a little, but it also slowly begins to transform your entire thought process. This is known as the silver lining.

5. The most important energy enhancement - breathing deeply

Most of us don't know how to breathe. We're always hustling and rushing through and forget one of the most important things in life - how to breathe. Breathing well goes from our body to our mind to our soul. Breathing exercises help expel the toxic air from your body and refill your body, and more importantly your brain, with fresh air. It clears your mind and allows you to regain mental clarity. One moment of clarity at the right time can change everything. That's the reason breathing well is so important and only adds to the positivity in life.

6. Take a mental break

Exhaustion is a silent killer of positivity. Learn to take a break when things get overwhelming. Do something that gives your mind a break or whatever challenge you're facing that could mean maybe taking a nap/going for a stroll/going to the gym/going for a swim. The minute you take a small break, you're automatically rewired into a more energetic and positive zone. The whole process becomes easier.

7. Performing random acts of kindness

Sometimes it's good to give out rather than just waiting to receive. Finding ways to put a smile on others faces affects you as much as it affects them. It takes the focus off of you and the problem allows you to be in a positive force in the lives of others. Doing good for others only makes you feel better. It's a tad selfish but it's the good kind because it lifts your mood and improves your self-esteem and self-worth and serves as a small distraction from your current challenges.

8. Disconnect from reality

Enjoy nature - it's available and accessible.

We don't need to run out to a place, we can do that wherever we are. Just take in the birds chirping, the sea breeze, the sand, your garden, cars passing by. Everything has something to do with nature. Spending time in the serene environments has been scientifically proven to lower stress levels, improve working memory and provide a sense of rejuvenation.

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