23 days after...

Rais...

Knowing his name didn't make a difference, I got nothing else from him.

He was still a stranger.

One who slept in the yard.

Rais was sleeping on the grass. I didn't know how he got there, but he looked so tired and deep in sleep that I felt the need to tuck him in. But of course, I wasn't going to. I don't know how he got there, or why he slept there. I hadn't heard it arrive during the night, the morning when I woke up and looked out the window I found him sleeping under the tree in my window.

When checking his pulse and feeling that he was still alive, I noticed a chain on his neck. I was curious and pulled the chain a little to see what was hanging from it, but the fabric of his shirt moved away from his body, showing part of the skin on his chest and I could see a long scar on it. Release the chain gently, letting the fabric slide back into place.

The scar on his eyebrow, the burn on his neck, the scar on his chest, and his strange attitude ... if they weren't enough reasons to fear him, it could aggravate the fact that sleeping he looked infinitely annoyed with life... and reasons were not lacking.

Less for having me close.

—¡Rais!

He didn't startle as expected. He just opened his eyes a little more than he used to and looked at me. With one swift movement, he reached for my neck and knocked me to the ground; He straddled me and, before seeing the impact of the blow; I closed my eyes, but then I did not feel his weight on me. When I looked for him, I was about to jump over the fence where Mr.Beltram's orchard was.

Got mad?.

I got up, removing the grass from my hair and approached the fence that was a high wall that you couldn't see over, and being me, I couldn't get through it with the ease that Rais showed. I only leaned closer to hear him growl:

—Easy, Rais, easy.

He kicked something, and that something pushed other things that caused more noise.

—Shit...—he sighed and heard himself picking up things.

After dinner he went upstairs leaving his "protection elements" on the counter, we had not exchanged a word, and at no time had he looked at me, of course, I did, there was nothing more to see than his faces and actions. Watch your plate half full on the table and then the light of your flashlight disappear on the stairs, gather things and store the leftovers in one thousand of Tupperware that you had taken care of collecting, leave it in the fridge for leftovers, we had about eight five of them full of meat, we had enough for a few years and we waited for something to happen to us later when we went to the field the animals were alive but neither of us had the will to hurt them. They would lose us without the generator.

He has done everything for both of us...

The anger came back to me at that thought, of course, it was true, but I did not need to hear it when I tried to be offended by his actions, because if I am afraid of him and I cannot tell him the things that bother me, I hope he will only notice that most of his actions displease me, although apparently, he doesn't care, he just gives me that condescending look and muffles that devilish smile.

I went upstairs to take one candle after cleaning the dishes. As I passed in front of his room, my sigh put out the flame and I stayed in the middle of the hall, hearing it. For a moment my face had turned red when I heard him moan, but when I realized it was because of a cry that he was trying to hide, I felt again the helplessness and anguish in my chest reminding me that nothing was going to be the same.

Rais, as stupid as it seemed to me, was an incredible person who, between his cynicism, ironies, and attacks of anger towards what was necessary to carry us forward without knowing if at some point something good could happen, he did it almost unconditionally. I remembered his face that afternoon after connecting the generator, that welcoming and attentive expression that told you: everything will be fine. And now, his strength and will had been broken and I could not help but feel guilty about it. I did not even know why I opened the door to the room and entered, seeing how his dominant figure stood in my direction in surprise.

—What's happening?—His voice did his best to hide his emotions, and I got even angrier because he still had an interest in helping me.

—It went out—I showed him my candle. Although it was stupid, the darkness that surrounded us made vision impossible — I need your lighter.

He held his breath for a few moments and released it with a slight sigh. I would not have known what it meant if I weren't such a crybaby. He was crumbling in front of me and I couldn't see him. He got out of bed and again I felt that familiar fear that made me see him standing in the dark; it was as if an evil specter appeared slowly and was about to jump on me. He lit a spark that lit the room for a few seconds and then I felt his warm hand take mine, placing the cold metal zippo in my palm.

—Keep him.

And just like that, without further ado, I lit the candle in front of him, his expression of astonishment at my action was visible, and between them, his red eyes and his bare chest heaving with the effort to contain himself. It was the last stroke of reality I needed to understand that...

—It's our end...

I knew I said it out loud when he looked away. There were no words he could say to contradict me.

—No—his voice came out strange, deeper than normal and he saw me again, the flame wonderfully reflecting the hints of colors in his eyes.

—It's our end—I said more securely this time, and he denied, refusing to accept it — You don't even know what to do to stop.

—I know I must do, and stay stuck in the dark waiting for my end. It is not, we just have to continue, as before.

—I had a family...

—I had nobody, Zachary, and now I have you.

And suddenly, everything didn't seem so bad.

I have you...