Of Duels and Illegal Cuddles

11 November 423

I was tense-

Actually, I wasn't really that tense. More like… nervous. Today was the day I was going to face Crusch and I had a particular feeling that the aftermath was going to shock a few people. I could already tell that the atmosphere at the castle was a strained one. Many among servants, passing nobles and guards- pretty much all occupants were all expecting me to lose. I mean, I don't blame them for thinking this as the most common sight they had of me was either me running around to get some papers delivered, or stuck in my office to deal with businesses and… in a way, that was actually my normal week. I barely left the office due to how much attention the bureaucracy needed, so that was a common sight that would easily create the notion that I had put a stop to my training to focus on my job. What many didn't know except perhaps Fourier, the twins and even Ferris was that it wasn't the case. In fact, I hadn't exactly stopped training. My limited schedule prevented sparring sessions to be a thing, but I had the hour between breakfast and me starting my shift, the two hours breaks from Lunch and finally the thirty minutes before dinner to do some exercises and practicing swordplay so I could keep that skill sharp and useful. Previous skirmishes had proven that even as a Prime Minister, I still was at risk of getting attacked, specifically by the Witch Cult.

I had improved a fair bit after some years of studying and refining what I got already as skills thanks to Wilhelm's harsh training, so I knew the basis and I could study autonomously through what books I could find about swordsmanship that came from Kararagi. Why Kararagi? The interest came mostly from a lesson Wilhelm taught to both me and Fourier when we started training together. A lesson that even now resonated as it was so simple and yet so important for battles against swordsmen. Man and sword are one and the same during a fight, so all advantages a man had, were the advantages of a sword. Likewise, a sword's disadvantages were the man's own. But two particular factors matter the most in combat: speed and reach. The capacity to elude attacks and the means to strike your opponent without having to expose yourself to any reprisals. It was a classic strategy, but one that was usually overlooked because it was too simplistic and required years, if not decades, of experience to gain a compelling advantage. The reason why that was a requirement tied up to an issue that was never looked much into due to how similar swords were in most combat. In places like Lugnica, Western/European swords were mostly common, whereas in Kararagi the same applied but with Chinese/Japanese blades. Both fighters' weapons were the same, denying any advantage in reach and thus limiting the combat to just outspeed the opponent one way or another.

But what happens when one of the fighters has a longer but also lighter sword? There were two possible outcomes from that advantage: either the fighter is inexperienced with the sword itself and that can easily result in a defeat, or they know how to handle it and can exploit all advantages in time to prevent the opponent from thinking of a counter to this strategy. Which is why, much to Fourier's own confusion, he found me training a lot with a practice katana sword while the real deal was a project in the making since I wanted to create it on my own. It was bizarre to see wandering off for 'business' when I was actually checking some blacksmith and replicating what I could find in some books specialized in crafting this kind of sword. It was a tedious job that had me disappointed with the lack of results for almost two months, but I managed to ultimately get a blade to be prepared to use in case my previous one didn't give me any major advantages. I tested it, its weight impeccably light and granting me a satisfying degree of mobility. It was a major upgrade from previous training and it gave me the time to actually win the duel with Crusch. Of course, it wasn't going to be an easy win, not when she was training with Wilhelm but… I hadn't slouched, and I knew that I could move fast enough to dodge any assaults whenever I needed. My stamina had increased, I had been eating healthy and I had that morbid curiosity to know what people would think of the fact my muscles were a bit more refined after the last bout of training I shared with Fourier.

The match was meant to unfold two hours after lunch, thus pulling me from my light-shift to give me the time to prepare for the fight. I hummed happily as the twins glanced at the sword while I finished putting on the last bit of my armor.

"Dad, are you sure you got this?" Hans asked with a curious tone. I couldn't feel any lack of confidence in my skill, but rather a burning curiosity while Fritz kept on ogling at the pretty silver-hilt I had selected to match with the white blade. "Like, Crusch is quite determined to… you know."

I blinked. "Do I?"

He pouted. "I mean, she wants to marry you."

Pausing, I frowned at him. "She isn't planning to outright marry me through this duel, Hans. She will ask for a proper date and then try to have us agree on a marriage."

…

"But you don't want to."

"That's… correct."

There was a strangely tense pause.

"But why?"

I blinked, turning to glance once more at him. "Why what?"

"Why not… marry her? Or them."

I smiled. "It's not that simple. They would hurt if I did that."

"Isn't this what they want? To be with you?"

I was finally done with the preparation and I hummed quietly as I turned to pick up Hans and sit with him by his brother.

"Well, that's… the general understanding of romance. It's what they say they could accept, but not what they will ultimately settle for as… romantic love isn't something you can share with too many people. It's not like love for family or for friends, that one can share as much as they can with numerous people. Romantic love is… special. Unique. And any attempt to… well, bring so many in a single relationship can be hurtful for the partners in that relationship."

"How so?" Fritz inquired, having picked up the topic of this unplanned conversation.

"Romantic relationships require a form of affection that goes beyond mere friendship. Which isn't something that can be achieved with so many different people. Let me ask you this: if I end up 'marrying' both Crusch and Priscilla, how would they both react to having to live with each other fairly close and sharing my attention."

"Crusch wouldn't mind," Hans blurted out without thinking, almost without hesitation even. "But… then there is Priscilla."

"And she would never accept sharing that pedestal with anyone. Especially someone like Crusch. In fact, since it's Crusch, she would be even more antagonistic about it. And make things difficult for Crusch and create no little issues from time to time. And that's not something a healthy relationship should aspire for."

…

"So you don't marry them both-"

"Because both mates would be at each other's throats," Majima interjected flatly, the pup reminding me with her intervention that she was placidly listening to the entire conversation. "Humans are not like spirits or animals. They have a sense of pride when it comes to love and privacy that makes it impossible for a relationship bigger than two to exist."

"So it would be best to not try that kind of attempt. It wouldn't end well for anyone."

There was some quiet agreement from the siblings and with that out of the way I finally moved to handle the duel. It was by all means not a private one. It was still modestly-restrained, with the spectators being made by familiar faces. First I noticed was Meckart's annoyed look. I would have expected Crusch's father to be more furious about this, but I could tell that he had the time and the opportunity over this situation. It definitely caught me off-guard when he said he was sorry for his daughter's behavior. And it was there I realized how the man was mostly frustrated at Crusch's own decision than me being tied to all of this. Fourier was sitting with Felix, the medic looking fairly apprehensive as either of his friends was going to get hurt by this move while the prince wondered who was going to win and how. There was also Miklotov, the former PM looking quite excited as he chatted animatedly with Wilhelm about this very situation. The Sword Demon looking more interested in me from the way he stared at my light armor and… my sword. His eyes widened just a fraction, but I could perceive surprise and a degree of worry for his most recent protegé.

Finally, I looked at Crusch and I could say she wasn't taking any chances about this duel. She was wearing a strong-looking light-armor that protected most of her weak spots like joints, her shoulders, her full torso and her knees. She decided to bring Lion Rampant, the Karsten Family's sword, for this very important event. I stood in front of her and she looked fairly tense behind that mask of confidence.

"Lady Karsten, I will not hold back and I will make sure to not lose within the boundaries of the rules."

The green-haired woman looked taken back by that calm proclamation and she looked even more nervous when she noticed I wasn't planning to use my usual sword. The Muramasa sword I had created wasn't just a mere sword, not with the materials used to conceive it. Resilient, light, and particularly pleasant to the eye. I hadn't really planned for the latter, but the fact it resulted in such an angelic theme of color really added a lovely hue to the overall amount of good stats it had to have. Despite this display, Crusch's determination did not falter. The woman wasn't planning to give up just at a minor shock, and merely sharpened her mind and prepared as the duel soon began. Reinhard was picked as the referee, the redhead looking fairly interested by my sword but saying anything about it as Crusch and I took proper stances at an acceptable distance. I barely heard what words the strong knight had used to start the match, but as soon as he spoke, I bolted towards Crusch as the young woman did the same.

Sword met sword, with my early plan being to lull her in a false state of security. She didn't seem to notice my blade had a higher reach, and since we couldn't use magic, I didn't worry for her to pull some tricks to curb this element of surprise. Her attacks were blocked by mine, with the confrontation suddenly devolving into a flurry of sparks and screeches as the blades met and slammed onto one another, their edges proving to be a match for one another. The heated clash was way more intense than I imagined, and I could see that I could already start capitalizing on the current situation by faking a sudden and hasty attempt to retreat. I had to time it perfectly and, as I took just two steps back, Crusch thought she had a major opening to strike into. So she followed through, but didn't expect for her stance to instantly falter as those extra steps I had between her and me were more than enough to start pushing her approach around and make her posture tilt left and right. Her eyes widened as I side-stepped allowing her to almost trip forward due to the intense sword-playing. She caught herself just before that could happen, with her eyes narrowing back at me.

She knew that she didn't have an advantage reach-wise, which made her question her current tactic on the spot… and yet the woman couldn't think of anything on the spot since I was already pressing back onto her and forcing her to resume that very stalemate that tricked her just moments ago. Crusch didn't say anything, but I could see the kind of glares she was throwing at me as she really knew what was going on at this point. The issue for her now was trying to counter it… or fail to win. So, I decided to go for the second feign I had planned for this fight. I had already expected her to notice the issue she was stuck with, which is why I knew that I couldn't use the same trick twice… without something to counter any attempt to beat it. So I went to take a few extra steps back and, as she expected me to hesitate at her lack of follow-ups, I rushed back into the fray and aggressively put everything on the offensive. Newfound shock appeared on her face as the duchess struggled to keep a solid defense, with the assault forcing her to take rapid steps back to try and lessen the intensity of the strikes. I suddenly stopped, no particular reason behind that move beyond trying to get her to fall at this stunt. The young woman almost did, and yet she managed to stabilize her footing once more out of pure and sheer determination.

It was one of the most intriguing sights I was blessed with. It was there that Crusch's own training with combat was displayed in its easiest and most basic form. She should have fallen twice now due to how intense these confrontations were, and yet she pulled herself out of trouble with her own confidence and training. Really impressive, but nonetheless frustrating as I needed her to hesitate and mess up so I could win without hurting her. Because yes, I was trying to get the most difficult scenario of this duel to happen. I had expected the duchess to be this fierce, but I hadn't really established enough contingencies to outsmart her current stance too many times. I had a limited window of opportunity to hit and… I wasn't really getting that wish from the looks of it. Crusch rushed back to try and outmaneuver me. Speed was her current hope, and I didn't plan to give her any advantage as she suddenly bolted to the side to try and encroach on my position from my left. I steered to keep my front aimed at her and backed away onto my own left. I saw her prepare to slam onto me, the pace she was going at and the way she was positioned just told me how she was planning to use that tactic against me. And I knew I couldn't avoid her at the neck-breaking pace she was going at. But I could do something else which had me grimace at the mere thought of it.

Yet I have to do it.

And so I did.

One moment Crusch was a few seconds away to strike me. Another she was tripping forward and right by my right side as she yelped in pain. Blood was drawn in minor quantities, with two single hits being delivered on her body. The first one hadn't been expected to land and do damage, and yet the sword managed to pierce into the protection on Crusch's right pauldron, the armor there faltering as a noticeable cut formed there. But it was the second strike that I knew would have worked the most. A sharp pain erupted in the woman's knee, specifically from behind as a cut had been created there and had flawlessly incapacitated her leg. With the speed she was going at and the pain she was in, Crusch managed just barely to bring her arms up to her face and cushion her face-first fall. I finally exhaled, noticing only then that I had been holding my breath during that risky move. The books I had read about Kararagi's unique swordsmanship had given me a couple of 'techniques' that didn't rely on magic, but physical strength and reaction time. In this case, the user took a sharp step forward moving their blade in an upward pattern that was meant to strike the opponent's closest arm, providing an opening to twirl around and then deliver a swift but precise strike on the leg. I didn't have any expectations for this to actually work, not with the fact I didn't have any live experience to know if it would have worked or not.

Still, it did the trick as Crusch dropped on the ground with two non-negligible wounds and the pain being enough to have her drop her sword far enough to be out of her hand's reach. I put the sword back in its scabbard, swiftly rushing up to her and crouching down to check on her injuries. Albeit nervous at my approach, Crusch realized that the fight was over from my end by the concerned look on her face.

"Where?"

No words, she merely patted her shoulder, right beside the wound and the rear section of her knee. No hesitation, I started to stabilize both gashes, and it was only through Felix that the wounds were properly healed. The cat-eared boy nodded once he was done and I carefully helped Crusch in a bridal carry. She lightly protested, something I noticed only as she started to softly pat her right fist onto my chest.

She was brought to her father, and allowed to sit beside him as the soreness of the wounds still lingered despite Felix's best efforts. Annoyance, disappointment… she had been defeated in quite the intense way. And I could see some self-loathing due to this. She had to have put a lot of her free time into training, but in improving herself, she failed to accept Sun-Tzu's finest rule about fighting a single enemy.

'If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.'

By refusing to know me more as an enemy and accepting the idea that I was a beatable opponent due to what happened last time we sparred, she left herself open for this defeat at my hand. Still, I didn't gloat or press onto the pride-related injury, doing actually the contrary about it.

"You know… you should keep trying."

…

"What?"

"I said 'Keep trying'. You got the right idea on how to fight back at my advantage, but it's clear you didn't see me as a dangerous foe as you should have. It's not like I stopped training or something like that," I elaborated with a serious voice. "After all, you are always the one that doesn't surrender when it comes to something you believe is important. Are you planning to tell me?"

"N-No! Of course not but… why?"

I blinked. "Why not?"

Her lips parted, pure surprise in her face as, for the first time in a while, I gave her a solid question that burned away any upset at her defeat.

Why not?

It sounded like an encouragement of sorts, something her father picked up instantly and reacted to it with a groan. But I could tell he also spotted the real meaning of this action as he knew that if she hadn't received that stern reminder, she would have blamed herself way more than she should have. She felt too invested in this, and any defeat, without a proper chance to go further, felt twice as humiliating for someone like her. So I took a risk, a calculated one, by pushing her to do something like this once more. Maybe it wouldn't be a duel, maybe it would be more tied to conversations or other activities. Regardless of that, Crush was going to keep trying and… not put me into any pressure anytime soon. Which was why I had gone through with this duel. This defeat would force her back to plan things better by studying my situation once again, this time taking her time to not allow other mistakes.

And at this point, it was only a matter of time before I discovered a way out of this entire mess without ruining any current relationships. I was incredibly convinced of this.

Pandora hates kids.

At least, those kids that were willing to do their best to annoy her to this point.

Her nostalgic visit at her birthplace had rekindled a sense of need that she had long thought had been buried in the last few centuries. She had been so sure of it that she was barely prepared when it struck her once more, as fiercely as it did the first time. She wanted to nap on someone that she could trust and wouldn't kill her on the spot. Someone that was like John, and yet someone that was currently approachable. John Bukharin was picked for the divine task of sleep-cuddling. While he was particularly resilient to her magic, the rest of his family wasn't so infiltrating the castle and getting to his bedchambers proved to be as easy as previous times. He was already sleeping, and the girl knew it was tied to a duel he had been part of. He won, strongly too. A brilliant man… but she didn't care for his intelligence right now. No, Pandora wanted her cuddling craving solved at once, even if it meant putting the entire capital to sleep so she could get into that room. Her plan worked, for the most part. She didn't expect for someone to be able to wake up through her strong compulsion, or that they could actually provide for a strong headbutt. The feeling of her nose cracking at a sturdy head slamming onto her face? Unpleasant and quite the source of further crankiness when she directed her frustrated blue eyes to the responsible for this attack.

For a moment, she was stunned to find herself before a smaller Echidna, but then she realized this wasn't the case. No, this wasn't the Witch… She was different. Quite the unique individual if she had to be honest. "Mine," She claimed mightily, gaining a glare from Pandora that didn't seem to make much difference. So she decided to go for the offense, only for the monstrous witch to see her sight twisted and deformed as her head was suddenly removed from her body. A sharp cut, one that didn't deliver any sound or origin. Only the child, she was behaving. She reformed back to normal, frustrated but not advancing any further. Reality had warped at the child's whims. Which was absurd, and yet not tied to a Witch Factor. Absurd and worrying, then. She was awed by this display, and yet mostly furious at it. This little obstacle was frustrating. Not only because it prevented her from getting cuddles, but because it also reminded her of good memories. Fond memories that she wasn't planning to remember if she was being denied the basic need of getting a sleep filled with cuddles. The way she defended John was...

Like Pandora would have been with him.

Like I would have been with dad.

And that's where a horrible pain enveloped her heart. At first she blamed another attack from the defending child, but she was quick to concede it wasn't her. Not when she was still remaining put and protecting the man still resting nearby. There was no further exchange as part of reality collapsed right behind Pandora and allowed her to slip away from sight after she finished removing the spells she put on the room. She left wordlessly, her bitterness staining her youthful visage for the remainder of the week. No one could approach her, not when she would shoot powerful glares followed by the explosion of some heads to make her point across. She didn't want to speak with anyone, not when she had so much to think of what to do next. She wanted to talk to John now, she knew that he wouldn't listen. She needed him to be exposed, in a situation where he had to talk with her. And where she was useful. So, she waited longingly for when his next plans were to unfold. She would remain quiet, looking at some odd cases unfolding within the cult and… then strike when he was well deep into that library of deceptions.

Pandora was going to be John's bearer of truth only if he allowed himself to do the same for her.

For they both had questions that only each other could answer about. Of that, she was sure of it.

AN

Edna can… warp reality?

Omake 27: IF (Different Entry – Felt)

"How much will this sell?"

Many times in my life I thought of myself as a good man with no bad intentions in my bones if those weren't somewhat deserved from some unsavory individuals. Many times, I thought reincarnation, if it was a real thing, would have been merciful due to karma. I was proven wrong, and not in a pleasant way. No, far from it. The capital, a rich hub of trade and production, wasn't completely improving under the economic effects of the massive commerce happening within it. The phenomenon of slums has been one that has existed for decades now. It was no novelty, but it was also far from having grown 'benign' for the ruling government. People living in the slums? Pests. We were hardly considered citizens.

Of course, that was until I woke up and managed to build a career as a criminal. Not the 'I am going to kill you if you don't pay the pizzo', but more like 'I am like Giorno Giovanna, so you pay me so you can prosper'. Starting a criminal gang? No easy feat. At least, not when you don't have some initial muscles. Of course, there is no such thing as despair in my idyllic hopes and dreams of betterment, so I started with little. The three thuglets that harassed Barusu? I managed to 'hire' them through some convincing and persuasion. They listened smoothly when I told them I had the most brilliant scam in mind.

They just needed to help me set up the ambitious plan I had in mind: Find a poor merchant in difficulty, help him up with any thieves trying to scam him, make a small profit out of it. They looked fairly surprised when we offered our service at a small fee, but even more when I decided to not get any money and ask for a single thing in return. One percent of his gains. The big scam started early in the morning that day, around six or seven, and we finished by dinnertime with the three happy thugs keeping away their 'honest money' while I ended up scoring the same deal with roughly forty other shops. Nothing significant on the individual scale, but if a shop managed to do at least 100 coins each day, I would get 10. Then these 10 coins would be multiplied by 40 and become 400. What to do with 400 coins each day? You invest. And you invest cleverly. A quarter of those would be set aside for big projects like buying a legitimate building and having it prepared for a legitimate activity. The long-term project was to establish something that produced money on its own rather than have me depend too heavily on my first but temporary economic base. 200 would be used to 'shower' the brawn of the plan with either gifts, food, or equipment. At first they were distrustful of my 'kindness', but they grew to like it after just a week. And they relied on me even more since I pulled them out of their poor holes. The rest was used for food and other services, with the leftovers pushed onto the 'big plan budget'.

A month later, we had a proper base and we had started to gain a legitimate group. I was forced to spend a lot on making the money I made to be safer and safer from some of these individuals. Women in particular as they decided that, in their eyes, I was a bachelor worthy of throwing themselves at. Really upsetting but… then things changed when the money-making tripled and everyone started to get satisfied with what they would get. The 'company' grew to cover the entirety of the slum, with already a few strong footholds within the 'inner rings' of the capital as poorer merchants from the middle class were already loving the Guild of Thieves I had established. At first the government was upset about us, but things changed when I got a meeting with Miklotov and a couple of other sages. An agreement was established for me to pay a toll to have their blessing on my activity. It was a bit pricey, but nothing that really concerned me. Not when it was just a fixed cost that didn't take into account how fast we were expanding. It was at this point that I got hold of Felt, or rather had her join the corps as a prodigy. It all started when Rom offered his bar as a secondary headquarter, which was perceived as a nice expansion as it offered a noticeable look over the available ground for new constructions. And I finally met Felt.

Little brat, really a tsundere. But one that I realized wanted something that gold couldn't pay. And that was someone a bit closer to her age to give her some platonic affection. Little Felt became a bit of a fixture wherever I went. My favorite 'rookie' in a way, and while many were upset by this decision, none made a fuss to not get 'docked money for making me pissed'. I had effectively established something that appeared less as a Guild of Thieves and more of a Mafia-like organization. I was the boss, the three thugs and a couple of the earlier thieves I hired were given leadership in some areas and we were expanding really fast. And by the time the elections were announced and people were rallying to find out the newest candidates that would have become king, the group had already established itself as the vanguard of criminal bourgeoisie within Lugnica. Some cities tried to mimic us, but only those that allowed me to tap into some of their economy were able to survive because I invested into those.

The slums started to shape up into acceptable buildings, with little the nobles could do since it was beyond their power to stop this little rise. Knights tried to deter a few jobs by advancing some patrols to 'protect citizens', but due to popular dissent the entire plan went in the trash bin. So here I was, sitting by my desk with Felt setting down the piece she had just stolen from Emilia and… I sighed.

"It will not sell."

She huffed. "What do you mean? It has to be precious! The committer-"

"Is not someone we can work with anymore if they asked for this," I sharply commented. "For you see, Felt. This is something that the government would make a war over. This is a magical insignia that allows for candidates to the throne to be highlighted."

"...Does it shine if it catches a candidate?"

…

I sighed. "Did it shine for you?"

She didn't say anything, the blonde merely picked the item with her index and thumb and showed it to me. It glowed, and I knew what that meant.

"Do you remember when I said you might have some royal blood due to your hair and eye color?"

Felt's scowl deepened. "Please no."

"I believe it's time to get our loyal tailor to fix you a nice and comfy skirt, sister."

"Please no!" She repeated, this time more forcefully.

"This is beyond my hands. I can allow you to bend the rules, but not break them. You can still wear pants underneath the skirt."

Her eyes narrowed. "What but… why?"

"Well, so nobody can look under the skirt and piss you off."

She opened her mouth… and then closed it. "Fair point."

"So the skirt stays-"

"Fuck no!"

"Hell yeah it does, kiddo. That's not a point you can whine about and… I have to now get Reinhard on the line and see if he can remove this Gustekian pest..."

Never too easy for a gentle mafia man like me…