Chapter 6 - Confrontation

Let's jump ahead. After the event at Fitzwilliam Museum which is the most whoreshit I've ever discovered. I can't believe Dad is seeing a man for over 14 years. I decided to talk to him about it, or I think it's not a good idea, it will make my relationship with Dad more worst. But if I'll tell Dad that I am like him? Maybe the worst idea, it's really awkward and very uncomfortable you know, both the Sr. and Jr. shares a dark secret about sexuality, but I'm not totally like him, he's worst, he dragged Mom and Princess Irina as his cover. And even if I get married to a woman someday, I swear to God that I will not to turn out like my father.

Besides, I'm clean, I only loved a woman so far, I never dared to get involved in a same sex relationship, yep, I'm trying to live a heterosexual life, because I'm aware how bad it gets to your family in the future, seeing my pitiful my life today is the cause of my Dad's temptation. And shit, I'm in love with Eliza, for real, she turned me on.

"You think I should court her?" I asked Gerald and Zelbert while sweeping on the floor of my apartment.

"Yes, yes you should, I want you to introduce her to us if she says yes" said Gerald while drinking my coffee that supposed to be my breakfast.

"But what if she says no?" I asked with worry

"No, she will, I'm sure of it, how will she reject you? You're handsome, innocent and virgin"Zelbert joked. "But honestly, I'm 90% sure she will say yes, I mean look again, she's the one who approached you at the first place you met, she comforted you, man that's pure, I envy it" he added.

"Now, dress up, look presentable, meet her and ask her for a dinner date" Gerald said while rubbing my shoulder.

"You guys think it's a good idea? Won't she think that I'm too fast? Rushing? Maybe I should wait for more weeks?" I said while continuing sweeping the floor.

"William, I have something to share to you" Gerald said with smiley face and Zelbert looks excited too. "Back in the days at high school when I was studying at Liverpool, I had my first girlfriend there, cute and sexy at the same time. Before I had her, she was my crush for 2 years, she was so popular at the school that time, so I was shy to express my feelings on her, until the Junior's ball, I finally confessed on her, then we became couple, I thought I'm gonna happy because I finally have her." Gerald was still smiling telling that to us but suddenly his face became serious.

"But a month passed, she was already cold and uncomfortable with my side, later did I know, she was into older dudes. She was my father's fucking mistress, me and my girlfriend was just 17 years old that time, so my dad was sued and put into prison for child abuse and adultery, and me? I was drowned by embarrassment, I became a laughing stock at school, a classmate used my family as an insult, so I beat him up, after that I never got a single friend left at school, even at the neighborhood. I promised on myself that someday, I'll run away from my family, to a place where no one can recognize who I am and start a new life, so William, that Eliza Cleaver you're talking about? Go for it, if she says yes, good for you, if she says no, also good for you."

His advice doesn't make any sense at all, but his background love story is so tragic, his father was even involve.

"Gerald, that was sick!" Zelbert said while his eyes open wide.

"Well who's talking, your story was sick too, at least now, we are all fair, the three of us has a total fuck-ups lives, let's just support each other because we only have each other". Gerald hugged us.

"Gerald..too early for dramàs!!" we all laugh.

So I made a decision to ask Eliza on a date, but before that, I decided to talk with Dad, trying to see if there is something I can clarify. Good thing dad agreed, he said he had something to talk with me too. So he brought me to a restaurant for lunch after he and his family done in church.

"Your brothers begged to come with me just to see you here" he said while slicing the meat on his plate.

"Good thing you insisted, I don't want to be with them anyway, last time I gave them a chance to hang out with me and have at least a little closure between my half brothers, but it was a total mess and chaotic"

"I heard about the accident, thank goodness the Prime Minister isn't aware about it"

"Why? Are you scared that the Prime Minister that will know about me? And it wasn't my fault anyway"

"I didn't say it's your fault"

"They forced me to come with them".

He just continued to eat his meat.

"I heard from Jim that his Grandfather will help you to get elected as the next Prime Minister, is it true?" I asked.

"I'm still working on it"

"But you agreed right? So it means you want to"

"Why? It doesn't sound great that your father will be a Prime Minister?"

"You can't even care about me and now you're trying to take responsibility of the whole country?"

"Now watch your words Junior, I asked you to stay with us so that I can take the responsibility on you but you always insist. Even Irina wants you there because she also cared for you".

"Oh is she? Why does she looks like pretending to be a good person to me?". Dad didn't respond.

Dad is always calm when he talks, his voice is always low, I rarely hear him yell, it's hard to identify if he's angry or what. I just sigh after he said that.

"Dad" I said while dropping the knife and fork.

"What?"

"How are you gonna react if I tell you that I'm having a girlfriend?". He just smirked

"Huh..." he sigh.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked, I'm quite annoyed on his reaction.

"Its just, I thought you're a poof" what did he just said?

"You thought I'm gay??Dad, I'm not like you." I said in a quite loud voice.

"What?" he's confused.

I didn't respond for almost a minute, and I hesitated to talk, but my mouth slipped.

"Yes dad, I know now, I know about Lucius and his son Lucas". He is surely shocked that he stopped chewing his food.

"That's it, I'm going" he said while wiping his mouth with towel and was about to stand up.

"Dad face it, you don't need to be surprised...You're right...I am like you...Dad..I'm gay" I said in a low voice, don't want other customers to hear.

"Oh dear" he was shocked again

"I'm sorry" I said while nodding my head down. "I keep insisting it...I don't want it dad, I think you know the feeling, I know you've been through like this" I started to weep.

A minute of silence between us, I just keep looking at my food.

"You know the day when your mom got pregnant on you? I thought that was the biggest mistake of my life, I was so confused and scared at that time, I don't know what to do next, I was already in a relationship with Lucius that time and he's already married then he had Lucas which is just an infant, but then it changed when you were born, I realized that being with Lucius is the biggest mistake I made. So I broke up with him". He stated with a calm and cold voice.

"You ever loved mom?" I asked.

"Of course, I loved her, I thought my life was perfect at that moment"

"It's perfect, even if was just a toddler that time, I can remember the sweetness of life being with you and mom..But dad, why??" I started to shed tears.

"Me and your mom once talked about marriage, you're just about to reach 5 years old, about to tell your grandparents about it. But Lucius texted me, said he was outside at our house, his wife Susan broke up with him and left Lucas on him and all the responsibility. I told Lucius to stay at the garage so that your mom won't see him. After talking with your mom about our upcoming wedding, I went to the garage where Lucius is, he is crying and hugged me so I hugged him too, he didn't stopped crying in my shoulders, he didn't know what to do, I asked him to not to stay longer because your mother might see us, I said that he should go to his house and I'll follow after and we'll talk properly there, he agreed, but before he went out, he kissed me and I kissed him too, I can't deny that I still have feelings on him, and we are both aware on that, but wasn't aware that your mother Emily was watching us the whole time, she heard and saw everything. I don't have to explain to her, she already understands. I begged her not to tell anyone, I don't want to get banished from my family." Every words that dad released is a tears in my eyes.

"Then why would you bring up Princess Irina?" I asked.

"I didn't went to Windsor Gardens where Lucius's house at after, I ran away, I went to London, I wanted to crash my car or throw it with me on the River Thames. But I couldn't, I thought of you. I went out on the car and shouted in anger, I blamed myself about everything, that why I am like this? At that time, I thought I was alone, but then Irina showed up, I just ignored her because I was embarrassed, and I didn't know that she was the daughter of the Prime Minister of England. She handed me a towel, telling me to calm down, she took me into a bar, have a little drink, we are both drunk and we slept together."

God I can't believe Dad can still sleep with strangers.

"The next morning I woke, I recognized that she was Princess Irina, I was so scared that time since I'm just a stranger in her eyes, but she told me that it's okay and she likes me. The following weeks, she called and telling me that she is pregnant, her mother Mrs. Wickham talked to me, they want me to marry Princess Irina immediately before the Prime Minister found out about her pregnancy. I told Irina and her mother about you, they said I have to hide your identity as my son in public so they removed the "Sr." in my last name, the Prime Minister wanted his first Grandchild as my first born. I have no choice but to follow their orders. Your Grandma and Grandpa was shocked in the sudden news and I was still broke that time."

Now I was sad for Princess Irina and more tears shedded in my eyes.

"Did you loved Princess Irina?" I asked

"Who said you can only love once? We wouldn't have Jerry if we don't love each other. Now, stop crying."

"I'm not crying at all."

"So, when did you know?" he asked.

"About what?"

"About yourself"

"That was three years ago, I was so scared, because you know, the rule of our family"

"Junior, its not too late for you, you can change, it's a good thing that you discovered it earlier. You said earlier that you're having a girlfriend? Continue to it, she might help you, maintain your feelings on her, keep away on the guys you think that you find attractive"

"Instead of telling me what to do, why won't you tell me why you rarely visit me at my apartment? We lived nearby, just 4 miles apart. Why is that dad?"

"I was busy at work, and guess what, I'm the new head of our department, I'm one step closer of becoming the next CEO." Dad actually worked at Mustachee Development Corporation here in Cambridge.

"Last September, on the night of my birthday, I saw you and Lucius outside my apartment, you promised that you'll bring me to a dinner date with you, but instead you committed an affair again"

"I didn't expect that I'll met Lucius that day after 15 years of being away to each other, so I grabbed the opportunity."

"And you keep coming back". He didn't respond, so I stand up. "Thanks for the lunch, I'll get going, I have a date with a woman that I will never cheat."

Then I walked out on the restaurant and went directly to the salon.