In MHA with Tatsumaki's Powers!!! (dropped) well remake 6/24/24

I don't wanna waste too much time writing a proper review for the author as I don't think they would even take into account any of my points, so I'm gonna do a review for the readers. What you should expect by getting into this book: -nonsensical, bland and emotionless interactions that give you the feeling that the writing is worse than an MTL -the pacing being all over the place -the world background not being described at all -anti-climatic major plot events (like the moment he awakened his quirk) -the story strictly following canon (that is something the author said will happen in one of his comments because he doesn't like and I quote "when fan-fics add their own main characters into the story." ie: when main characters are actually relevant to the plot/ when mcs have the role and importance of an mc) What you shouldn't expect: -smooth plot and natural interactions (that means there is just forced plot and interactions all over the story) -the mc being tatsumaki (yes you read that right, you got bamboozled by the cover of the book, tatsumaki doesn't exist in this book, the mc is actually a bland guy being reincarnated with her powers but nerfed)

Reveal Spoiler

The idea sounds nice but i feel like the author dosnt know hoe to write characters or dialouge and the mc keeps going back on what he says like For example he feels like he needs to be a hero because he has a good quirk (as if he is the only one with a good quirk) and then he says he needs to hide his quirk in case the doctors decide to experiment on him for it being too good of a quirk (which is stupid since all for one isnt involved in any way and because mc acts like hes the only one to ever get a quirk thats good in the beginning) and by mc’s logic in the beginning you would think him limmiting himself would be a no-no cause it would Mess up his Quirk development and cause him to save Less people in the future but hes okay with it. so in basic terms mc is made out to be selfish and selfless at the same time which is wierd and isnt done well.

Keep it up don't drop or I'll find a way to find you. "love lolis huh" 🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎🔍🔎

Pretty good so far, only thing id change really is his mothers personality.. its really annoying. Also I really like how you made it so he forgot a lot of his past life unlike other fan fictions where the mcs somehow always have eidetic memory and never forget anything even after 10 years.. Anyway keep it up!

Grate idea but a very poor execution . Fells like MC doesn't have any character and acts stupidly for example pretending he has a week quirk so they don't experiment on him because he has too good of a quirk like he is the only person with a good quirk or to not act smart so he doesn't get attention then at 2 years old talks like a grown adult or deciding to be a hero because he has a good quirk like he is the only one who has it and I also feel like the characters lack personality

The more I read the more brain dead the MC gets. It just gives me a headache reading it now.

yikes. this is like reading a draft copy for a script, complete with spelling and grammatical errors. the thought processes are irrational, the plot has holes, the mc is dumb af, the writing seems robotic. stuff like; "then they talked about (insert vague topic description). they then went to class. he talked to (insert any random characters here). then he talked to (another group of random characters). aizawa arrives. they then sat down." we never know the contents of the discussion and when we do get to read the interaction it's like reading a conversation between two crazy AI's

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Your idea for using Tatsumaki's (aka Telekinesis) for a quirk, It's perfect for a world like MHA if done well. There is a similar quirk in the canon series IIRC called poltergeist utilized by Reiko Yanagi, the only difference between the two is Reiko can't affect living/organic matter. I was half expecting the MC to be in the same class as her so they could bounce ideas off of each other, yet sadly it didn't happen. Also for someone who isn't too fluent in English, the grammar isn't terrible, only the occasional punctuation missing or mispelled word. Grammarly would sort those out for you. Now for the problems, starting with the story progression; It's a bit messy to start off with, but that's to be expected for the first few chapters. The problem is that the story doesn't feel like it is planned out at all and you write whatever comes to mind. This isn't inherently a bad thing, it just leads to a messy reading experience with pacing, etc. After would be the world, the story is lacking in descriptive wording regarding his surroundings. It oftentimes is jarring to me personally because the entire chapter is just dialogue with the occasional scene switch. And lastly in my opinion is the reasoning behind the MC's actions. He has hidden his quirk's true power and potential at every turn. I get it, you want to have interesting fights, etc. in the future with that excuse as a scapegoat, I truly do. It's just so infuriating to read "I have to hold back" etc. It's an authors way of soft nerfing their characters and I'm not a massive fan of it. You claim that he doesn't wish to get AFO's attention, if he has Telekinesis on the level of Tatsumaki, he can comfortably solo the entire MHA universe. He has no reason to hide it, apart from you, the author, using it to make sure AFO doesn't stay in hiding which would ruin the preset plotline of canon. And that's about it. This is just an honest review, I may have misremembered a few things, or forgotten some parts, but that's all I have to say. I wish you luck in future chapters and potentially improving. <3

Would recommend mend Cuz this is just overpowered plz don’t Drop Plz don’t Author-sama

Author dont drop I’m Begging ing Plzzzzzz

First of all, i get what people said about not that great of intractions between characters but is acc decent i mean is not the best but still decent. Second, about mc hiding his powers, if u read till ch 12 it does change Third, the grammer is acc good comapred to 60 per cent of novels in this novel Fourth, the LI is not predictable as peole who read the first couple ch when he meets nejire think All i wish the author improves on is the character development. i dont understand why it has such low ratings when is acc a very good ff 👍 👍

although i wanted to give this 3 stars the writing had no problems neither the story development ig but wow the mc well he was dumb crying over a blanket well i m not sure if he got the mentality of 4 year or 18 year old (i think) i could't take it anymore