HER LAST SCENT

VIOLET'S POV

"Hey, Violet! Don't you have any plans to go home?" the husky voice of Mr. Smithson makes me turned my head on the doorway of our small office.

We have two wooden tables and two sets of computers, our white walls are filled with different kinds of plaque of awards for Jerry's Junction.

He is wearing his soiled apron.

They clean the kitchen with James and Molly as they had close down the Junction at 9:30 pm.

My regular off time is 8 pm but I intentionally extended to stay because going back to an empty home means sadness and pain for me.

I rub my strained eyes and replied, "Don't worry about me sir, I'm almost done." and face my computer again.

I have been very busy the whole day working with the inventory of our stocks from the available meat down to the hot sauce sachets.

The most important inventory are the raw materials, ingredients, and flavors.

We always have our supplier delivered daily for meat and fish to keep the freshness and its original flavors.

Then, he continued, "Alrighty! You have 5 minutes to close the computer, I do not want to leave you in here." I nodded, and he left to change.

Mr. Smithson left me no choice but to call it a day. I could always complete the inventory tomorrow.

I sighed.

After closing down everything, including the lights, I rushed towards the locker room to get my backpack.

"Are you ready to go?" Mr. Smithson checking on me again, which is unusual of him.

I know he's worried about me, I always heard him talking in the kitchen about me, on how I will cope with living alone.

James is always creasing his forehead now and then when Mr. Smithson is talking, he's not talking that much but I could see different kinds of reactions all over his face, you will know if he likes the topic or not.

But Molly is very chirpy, she makes all the responses that you will never forget.

"I wonder how things are going with Violet at home?" Mr. Smithson asked once as I passed by to check on the orders were lined up in the order window.

He is kneading the dough for the pizza crust and overheard Molly replied, "Well if I'm that young and alone at home. I know it would be very difficult for me, I couldn't even manage any household task at her age." She laughed heartily then continued, "Violet, is smart, intelligent, and hardworking. I think she could manage things by herself. She's no ordinary teen!"

I quickly returned to the dining area before anybody sees me at the window.

[I guess, it's about time to plan on what am I going to do for the next coming months.]

I always wanted everything to organize, I will make sure that everything is written.

"Journaling" keeps me sane from all the struggles that I have been through in the past and at the present.

All written goals and action plans are inside my journal notebook.

It keeps me on track on my do's and don't and scheduled.

Every night, I make daily messages for myself and affirmations which keeps my heart strong amidst the chaos.

Journaling is not new to me, I started to have one in 6th grade, that's the time of my transition in middle school.

In those times, talking to my journal is more viable than talking to my mom that's why I already have about 10 journal notebooks that I have kept inside my wooden chest. The chest dimensions are 20x15x20 inches, proportioned enough to be filled with my notebooks.

The wooden chest was a gift from Margaret on my 18th birthday, she found my journal notebooks piled up on my old dresser table.

So, she decided to have something for me that is very useful, and I appreciate it very much.

"Hey, Vi! Are you alright?" Ellie awakened me back to reality as we are heading out the Junction, followed by the others.

"Yes, I am fine!" I smiled and bid goodbye to everyone, run towards my bike, and unlock them.

Mr. Smithson, James, Molly, and Ellie waved goodbye.

And I started pedaling.

After 8 minutes...

I get off my bike and walking beside it towards our front door and locked them.

The house is dark, not a single light is open. It speaks loudly of life right now, I couldn't see, clarity is all I need.

I took my phone from my pocket then turned on the flashlight to avoid dropping the keys.

And I successfully inserted the keys and turned the doorknob, and push it open.

I move my phone to have a clearer view of the switch and tap them open.

Then, the warm colors of our sofa seats and our dining area decors will tell you about how my mom's emotions are, it conveys simple optimism to strong violence, that's her!

I quickly removed my backpack, thrown it at the couch.

"You are not doing that! Where are you supposed to put your bag?" my mom's voice echoes in my head.

[Yeah, she hates cluttered things inside the house.] I have learned from her how to organize the mess.

I take back the bag and bring it with me to my room, and hang it in the wall-mounted hanger placed at the back of my door.

Then get inside the bathroom, quickly undressed, and took a quick cold shower.

And my stomach started to growl, I forgot to eat my dinner. I used to eat at home for dinner since I need to prepare my mom's meal.

["Ugh!" That's something that I should be reminded of, to eat dinner at the Junction with the others.]

I took the kettle, add water, and turned on the gas. I wanted to have some cocoa and mallows drink.

Then, I opened our 5.3cu ft refrigerator to check what is in stock inside it. I couldn't even remember that I have had gone shopping, maybe 2-3 weeks ago.

[Oh! It's good to see a pack of whole wheat bread, some eggs, cheese, and a pack of green salad.]

Then, open the freezer, only the ice welcomed my eyes.

[Well, some bread, eggs, cheese, and salad would be fine for tonight.]

The whistling of the kettle called my attention while I'm taking out my dinner from the fridge.

Then put everything on our kitchen table, took our frying pan and oil for some scrambled eggs.

After 10 minutes of putting it all up, I'm satiated.

I turned on the TV which is not my fave thing to do, but I wanted some sound, to distract my mind from the deafening silence of our house.

Then, I check my phone's screen for any messages as seated on the couch in front of the TV.

My messenger notification pops up that I have new messages.

I tap it and check if it's Niki and I'm shocked looking at the sender.

Vaughn Nikolai: "Hey, Violet! How was your day?"

[I never expected him to message me. I know it's wrong, he does not belong to my world.]

But, I couldn't stop myself from sending my reply.

Me: "Hi, Vaughn! I'm fine thank you. :-)

Vaughn Nikolai: "I'm glad that you send me a reply. I worried a lot earlier while waiting for you to read it."

Me: "Oh so sorry, I have a long day at work today. I haven't noticed your message right away."

Vaughn Nikolai: "Guess, you might be very tired from work. Hope you will have a good sleep tonight! It's already late in our place. Good night Violet! Sleep well."

Me: "Yeah, thanks! Good night Vaughn!"

Then, my phone ringing.

Niki's name is flashing on the screen.

"Hello, Vi! Wazzup? Is everything fine in there?" I could hear her high-pitched voice.

"Yes, I guess. Maybe, I'm still doing some adjustments being alone."

"I know you will be fine! You are strong and flexible. Don't worry, I'll call you now and then, checking on you, okay?"

"Yeah, I know I should. Thanks, Niki!"

"Did Vaughn check on you?" I could hear her giggled on the line.

"Uhmm.. yeah."

"Ohmaygad! He surely never forgets you! Oh, that's my girl! Oh, oh!" I could see in my head, Niki's wide smile, cheering on me, and it lightened my mood.

Then she continued her interview, "Now, you have to tell me, what happened with your early breakfast date?" then she shrieks on the phone.

I almost dropped mine trying to take the phone away from my ears.

"Nothing, so special happened. It's just breakfast, friends eating breakfast together, that's all!"

"Uh uh Nah I don't believe you!" I could her crisp and distinct laugh because she had known me for too long that she could read me.

"He gives me a gold necklace with my initials on its pendant." She screamed which hurt my ears badly, she seemed to forget that we are on the phone.

I could hear squeaking sounds coming from the bed on Niki's background. Guess, she's jumping up and down on the bed while screaming.

"Hey, Niki! Niki? Nicole Samantha Williams! You are killing my eardrum right now! Can you stop screaming, please?" She always made me smile with her quirky character.

I met Niki at the Smithson Public School during our kindergarten.

It was during our break time that I remembered that was our first encounter with the bullies.

She was annoyed by our classmates with her kinky hair.

She fought with the other kids and she was slumped on the ground.

Seeing the two boys, crossing arms in front of her, while she is crying that, was the time I run towards her and started pushing the bullies away from her.

Then, they cried calling out our teacher and we ended at the Principal's office.

My mom was very furious as soon as she received the Principal's call about the incident.

That was the very first time I was grounded for 2 days, and my mom is not talking to me.

I was only allowed to go back to school when my kindergarten teacher visited our home and explained that it's not my fault, that they have found out the truth through Nicole's parents.

And that was not only one time that it happened, it's like they couldn't get enough of us.

There was an incident that Caleb and Blaze, our mortal enemies in kindergarten are picking on me because my mom failed to attend our school activity, I was all alone, seated on the bench of the park. They removed my favorite scrunchie off my hair. I run after them everywhere and when I got the chance, I punched them on each of their faces.

"Hey, Vi! Are you still there? I'm so sorry about that! I'm just feeling the excitement and love... Oof!" [Yes, that how she is! Sometimes very annoying but a great treasure to keep.]

"Sshhh... Please calm down Niki! Your grandma will be mad at you... it's late-night already in your place!"

"Oh, so sorry dear! My veins are still alive and kicking... I just woke up from my nap. And..."

"And what? Is there something I wanted to know?"

"Uhm... Ben just called up before I called you and he told me that he's going to the University of New Orleans... and it's just 4 hours away from my place! What do you think? It's coincidental, right? Or is it destiny? Could you tell me how my heartbeat is right now? It's drumming hard. I feel elated!"

She laughed her heart out, and it's very contiguous, she always makes me laugh every time.

"Niki, you better be sure about Ben's feelings, okay? I do not want you to cry over a guy again! Never again!"

[Yes, she just had a break up last month with Luke, her boyfriend for three years. Luke is Dawson's best friend. He is the famous goalkeeper on our school's hockey team. They met at Dawson's birthday party three years ago, and fall in love at first sight. And yes, you got it right! Niki believes in destiny!]

"Oh, you sounded like my mom! Don't you worry my dearest Vi, I will make sure of it! And it's about time to focus on my college, you know! And speaking of college, don't you have any plans to accept your scholarship?"

"Uhm... I don't know Niki... All I know, I have to work to save some money. I will need to figure out everything first, and I will let you know."

Those were our last conversations before we bid good night.

I stood up and rushed towards my room, then search for my new journal notebook.

It's time to write down my goal and things to-do list, in the search of Amelia Stern De Fuller.

After 3 minutes of searching, I found it in my bedside table drawer.

My mind is very distracted by everything, and I forgot where I had kept it.

As soon as I found it, I returned to the couch and started scribbling the date.

March 23, 2018

Goal: Find Amelia Stern De Fuller and my real family

Action Plan:

*Save enough money for the search in case I need to travel

*Duration: Within the next three months

-Work as much as I can and over time.

-Eat free meals in the Junction.

-Declutter things for a garage sale.

-Transfer to a smaller apartment nearby.

*Search for Amelia Stern De Fuller's location.

*Duration: After the three months of saving.

-Research on the internet and possible family and relatives of Amanda.

-Posting on pages and interview some close friends that I have known.

-Revisit old places that we used to be.

Then, I put the yellow highlight on saving money, since that's my top priority to accomplish, to move on to the next step.

I put on my cute sticker collections, a colorful rainbow for hope, a kiss, a pink bike, cute calligraphy "That's my girl! and another sticker said, "Yes, you can!". It will help to boost my strength and inspiration.

Then closed my journal.

When suddenly, a ringer tone echoes from my mom's room?

[Oh, gosh! Maybe it's Margaret's phone that she accidentally left behind?

Or is it my mom's phone?]

I quickly run myself to the door of my mom's room.

My heart started to become heavy, the pain of loss is making me hesitant to get inside the room.

The last time, I have been inside was the last time I saw her alive and gives me the letter.

I don't know if it's the right time for me to get inside again.

The scenario is kept and stored in my mind like it was the most painful moment and at the same time special of her revelation.

Then, the phone ringing again.

I sighed, pushed the doors open, and turned the lights on.

And the phone stopped ringing.

[Where is it?] I muttered.

I seat on the bedside and started to feel the bed covers, the blanket, the pillows, and smelling the last scent of my mom's favorite shampoo.

Then, I saw our old photo together on my first birthday.

It was framed in wood, hanged on the white walls, facing the bed.

And my tears start falling and pouring all the painful emotions like a thunderstorm in a summer sky.

[How will I survive this mom?] I cried out until my tears dried up.

Then, I drift off to sleep.