The Counter Plan

"Ah! First day at university…" I say standing at the front gate of that huge place where people think they come to become something but they end up just going on dates. First days never been a problem to me ever since I was in middle school. Yes middle school and I excluded the "primary" for a reason 'I WAS BULLIED'. Who would blame them anyways, I was tiny and people barely believed my mother when she said she is taking me to school. How things changed? Hmmm… after putting up with all the bully (well I didn't want to it was my mother who obliged me to behave or I would have wiped the floor with that douche face since day one) until I got to the last year of primary school. The last day was the day I got my freedom, and guess what I did as a celebration… I wiped the floor with that douche face. An honorable ending and no one, not even the teachers said a word. Why would they I was on the top of my class (if not the whole school) with my grades. Also, the deal with my mom was till the last day of primary school. She never mentioned I should behave till the very end of my studying years.

Where were we again… yeah, the first days? It troubles some people but for me they are just … how can I put that? Boring! You introduce yourself over and over again. Make friends and get to know your class, modules, and teachers then look around the school. You meet different types of people and so on. Same scenario all first days. However, this year will be different. I will try to keep a low profile and avoid making any friends. Friendships are nice but you got to lie a lot, let's be honest. And I grow fond of spending quality time alone so I would rather not make any friends until I feel like I can take some bullshit again. My goal is to be anti-social.

As I was planning how my university experience is going to be, I heard a voice from behind.

"Hi Jeana!"

"Crap…" I say in my head as I turn to face who just ruined my plan. I fake a smile and go like "Oh, Hey…" told you friendships are full of lie and this is the prof.

"I cannot believe that's really you. How did the top of the class end up here with us? We all thought that you went to study abroad." The two girls from my senior high say

"You did! I know right, but hey, you got to see more of me now, ha-ha" I say trying to hide my true intentions

"Yeah, we are happy that we met you in the first day. It is a bit scary to come to a new place and know no one. Right?" one of the girls continues as she looks at her friend.

'Totally' the other responses as she nods her head. They both look at me waiting for a comment.

"Why would you need a comment on that, your friend just commented so why another one" I say in my head as I utter completely different words "I know right!" with a fake smile always.

"Glad that you agree. What major are you in Jeana?" one of them asks.

"English"

"What?" the girl reacts with a confused face "that is a joke right? The top student is not studying abroad and yet she majored at a completely different field than the ones she likes. That is some huge news there!" she continues

This is here ladies and gentlemen one of the reasons why I do not want to be around a lot of people anymore. They label you as if they know you. In their heads, they already had a plan for you. I mean, I am not trying to be the bad guy here but hey, I do not want anyone to set my standards. So what if I was the top student and went to major at some field that even those with hopeless marks got in. that is my choice and I have all the right to do what I like with myself. Yet, because you should go with the flow, you do not attack people like this. All you say is

"Well, I know right!" I respond as I take a step back trying to put an end to this conversation and walk away.

"That is fine. This means you will be on the top as well. I am sure all those at your major are weak." the other says with an attitude.

"Excuse you!" I respond with a change is my facial expression.

"She did not mean anything come on! We should go." The other says grabbing her friend from her arm and walk away.

"Finally!" I say with a sigh-

How could people be so … jerk! Why on earth would anyone judge someone they do not know like that? I keep on mumbling while walking angrily trying to find my way to the English department. After some few minutes and some searching, I could spot -from a distance- some people from my senior high as well at the front door of the department. 'Plan B' I scream in silence. Let's just go and check the campus room. I will call this a day, it has already been ruined.

At the dormitory gate, I ask the agents about the bloc where I am supposed to sign in for my room. As soon as I get there, I go directly to meet the responsible for distributing the rooms. I am actually hoping to convince her to give me a room by my own.

(Yes, I meant it when I said I wanted to be anti-social and live alone) now let's just convince her.

"Hello freshman, how can I help you?" she says with a genuine smile.

(She smiled so she is nice) a typical thinking we do whenever we meet a new person and they smile at us. I wish we could stop doing this because it is the same way as judging people in a negative way. You know what just do not try to build any picture about a person at a first glance, leave it a blank and let them fill it themselves. This would save your life believe me.

"Hello madam, I was hoping to get my room key…"

"Go to the second floor, the desk on your right. Give the worker there your name and room number and he will hand you the key. Goodbye" she says with a firm face and then looks behind me as if she is saying "next one please!"

"Excuse me but I have not finished what I was saying." I say with disappointments.

"Are you telling me that you already have complaints?" she continues with that cold expression.

"No, it is not like that. I was just…"

"Off you go then. I do not have the whole day booked for you." she interrupts me again then point with her fingers at the door telling me to get lost.

I take three deep breaths trying to hold back the horrible scenario that is turning in my head right now. I got my keys later from the depressed worker on the second floor.

"Can this day go any worse?" I sigh going to this problem room. I open the door and "Yaay, it seems like nobody arrived yet so I have the privilege to choose the bed and the closet first" then there is this 'first to arrive means I will do the cleaning!' I clean the room, set my bed and organize my clothes and other stuff in my closet. I grab a piece of paper of the things I need to check.

"Separated bed…check"

"My pc with movies, anime, video games and a head set… check"

"Phone with web toon, manga and good music… check"

Everything is perfectly ready, the day is not that bad after all. I call my parents to tell them that I am all settled and they should not be worried. As soon as I dial my father's number, the door opens

"Hello, you must be the freshman." A giant girl says having her back covered by her two friends.

"Holly… and I was just thinking the day started to get better" I think in silence as I respond "yes, that's me. And you are?"

"I am your roommate!" she exclaims as she enters the room walking like a (I do not want to curse here but you know how). She adds "we need to set some rules but first my name is…"

"Do not mess with me and I will make sure not to turn your princess like life into hell. Keep your distance if you want to finish the year on your feet. Got that" I say giving her a dead look then I turn to her friends "if you are not signed in this room, do not show your faces here again. You can meet her downstairs or call her. Or you can hang out in your rooms. I do not like unwelcomed guests" then face her again.

She stood up and approached me, her friends following her like –we are three and you are tiny one- kind of scene. She says "Look here little one, you …"I interrupt her again holding her from the neck "I said, keep your distance." I say looking her straight in the eye as I grabbed her face near mine and tightened my hold around her throat then I set her free.

She took some steps back, gave me a look of "you just wait and you will see what I will do to you." But meh who cares. Having this dark side in me serves me well sometimes but I tend to hide it always. It only hurts people, or that's what my mom says. She gathered her things and left the room. I called my parents as I planned and made sure they are comfortable now knowing that I am doing fine. This is my first time staying away from them and I understand that they would bother me with several calls a day.

Few minutes later I hear the door knocking.

"Here comes trouble!" the voices inside my head utter.

I open the door and the lady from before is in front of me.

"You said you wanted a room by your own I recall."

"Yes, but you …"

She interrupts me again "is that…"

I interrupt her "I have not finished yet. So it is only polite to hear people till the end. I understand that you are aware of that regarding your age and status." I say giving her a cold look

She clears her throat then continues 'there is one if you are still interested'

"Why the sudden change in your opinion madam?"

"We heard that you might be better on your own."

"So the girl came to you, I suppose?"

"She did. And her friends said that you were… violent?" she says this with a low tone.

"You can say it… I was like a psycho. Don't be afraid I hear that a lot and you can say it out loud if you want. What I am curious about is why are you not here to throw me out, why give me an empty room all to myself?" I question her still keeping that no expression face on.

"You are still a student and we have no right to throw you out without a solid prof. so if you please just follow me I will show you your new room."

"Fine, give me some minutes to gather my stuff"

She shows me the room. It was tinier than the last one but I will be having this to myself only so it is perfect. I thank her and I started settling down all over again.

It is night now and I am dead tired. I lay on my bed and think on how that violent dark side sometimes saves you from people who think high of themselves. Like I said before, I tend to keep this part of me hidden because it will only … I find no words but it will make me lonely. At this moment I jump off my bed…

"LONELY!" I shout. So only have to keep this attitude on and no one would want to be near me. That is the plan then but wait, this attitude of mine only shows when I get attacked. So I cannot depend on it. Who says that people will be rude to me? I go back to bed and think of ways to not get close to anyone tomorrow. I think I can just avoid everyone unless those who approach me from last year. I would also reduce my interaction with them and they would definitely stop talking to me by the end. Nobody wants someone they don't want them back, that's reality.

Good morning second first day. Today is the first day to start the actual study. The day I will be in the same space with hundreds of people. What a perfect place to be for someone who wants to be an introvert. I get myself ready, put a hoodie on and get my headset on then off I go to my first class. As soon as I get there, I choose the place that everybody is trying to avoid. I sit and try not to make any eye contact. The teacher comes in and the ritual of self-introduction and what the module is about and what we want to be is on. I avoid the teacher so he does not ask me to introduce myself. I mean, I do not want anyone to know me and teachers at university are very different from those at high school. If you avoid them they avoid you, you will not be obliged to interact with them but so not expect high marks if they do not know you. My whole life was full with high marks so I have had enough of these. No problem then.

The class is over and I put on my headset walking away from that crowded zone. As I am walking 'or running away) I hear someone calling

"Hey you with the hoodie, hey… please hey!"

I try to keep on walking not turning around. My headset is on so they would not think that I am avoiding them. While I was deep in my thoughts, someone taps on my shoulder. I turn and take off my headset.

"Hey, I was calling you!" A girl says

'I heard you but I was not planning to turn around and that's why I kept walking can't you read the signs?!' I say in my head but actually say nothing as she continues.

"My name is ....."

Please don't give me your name or explain who you are I do not want to get involved with you. I kept on speaking in my head and I haven't heard anything she was saying. Somehow she stopped talking and I thought (oh god! Now she thinks I am rude! What now?)

She hands me her phone number and says "now if you found that girl please tell her what I told you. She said she knew you and call me when the next class starts please I really have to go now."

Wait! What just happened? And what am I supposed to save this number as. Wait! Why would I even save this number? I don't want to! I didn't plan to. I save the number anyways under the name 'classmate' then continue to my destination which I do not know where is that. I sit under a giant tree and open a can of cola and eat my snack. Finally a moment of peace with no one around. I think to myself how avoiding people is hard and how not to have friends is almost an impossible task. I wonder how others do it. I am sure that those who say that nobody wants to be their friend would be surprised if they knew that it is only an idea in their heads and making friends is easier than being lonely. Hence, you have to lie a lot in the process. You agree to what you don't agree on as long as it is not a serious matter. You laugh on jokes that are not funny because you just do not want to break their hearts. You do stupid things that you probably hate just because they are doing it and so on. Making friends is easy but keeping that relation is the hard task. Because at some moments you just want to rest and it is then when they think you have changed. They do not see that you changed yourself to fit in and this now is the real you but who cares. Introverts are not weird people, they are just honest with themselves and they have only few friends if not just one. Just one true friend with whom they stay true to themselves. I envy them.

Now, the break is over and the next class starts. On my way I notice people are gathering in groups. The university life is radically different than any other educational experience. I reach the classroom and no teacher is there. The class is cancelled. How would they cancel a class on a first day? Who cancels a first session?

I turn back and get out of the classroom. A voice is calling for me again and this time I have to turn because no headset is on and the distance is too close to make an excuse like "oh sorry I haven't heard you calling!"

"Hey again, you haven't called! But luckily I came to class on time. Any plans?" the girl I save her number as classmate is facing me and she is so cute but I do not want friends ugh.

"Heyy! Yeah I am sorry but I didn't meet the girl you told me about and you made it here before me" I say smiling like a stupid.

"Yah I know, I was looking for you and thought I should have taken your number to call you." she responds with a girly tone. For a tomboy like me, I feel ashamed.

"No it is fine. Now if you excuse me, I have to go" I say trying to make my way out of the crowd. University is so freaking crowded.

She holds my arm as she says "if you are free, would you please come with me to the languages center to sign there for a French class? I get scared when I walk alone."

I am a bad liar and I cannot refuse requests that come this smooth and polite so "Yes, no problem!" I say.

As we reach the center of languages, she enters to sign in while I take my time observing the walls decorations. My last stop was the Eifel Tower painting.

"Are you a fan?"

"Not really." I respond

"Then why are you staring at it? You have been standing here for a while now."

"I was trying to figure how people find such a place romantic. It is just a pile of metal. On the top of that I think that it looks like a dick." I say then I realize that I am responding to a guy that I haven't looked at yet and I am speaking non sense. After the last word I said I was thinking I should just find my way out without sharing an eye contact because that was super embracing.

The guys bursts into laughter and comments on what I said "I couldn't agree more!" he reaches his hand to me introducing himself "Hi, I am Luke."

I turn around to find this huge status bending down so I could reach his eyesight

'Hahahaahaha" I laugh awkwardly then shake his hand saying "I am Jeana. Sorry for what I have just said I think I was too immersed in that painting that I lost track of my words." I am shaking because one, I messed things up with a strangers and he probably think that I am a creep. Second, it is either I am too tiny that everyone I meet seems giant or he is ridiculously huge.

He laughs "please don't say that. I liked you. You seem funny and I like the fact that you talked like that. It means you are comfortable and you are enough to yourself that you do not need others to confirm your point of view. You speak your mind! And that is brave." He adds as he moves his hand as a sign that I was holding it for too long.

I let go of his hand immediately and apologize. Is he an analyst or a psychiatrist? What's with that long speech?

"Why are you here for?" Luke asks

"I am here with a classmate. She is signing in for a French class. You?"

"I was just passing by and I saw someone immersed in the Eifel tower painting so I thought I could say hi." he jokes.

"Ha-ha, very funny!" I comment with a straight face.

"So, any plans for university. I bet you are excited to make friends and make a lot of memories." He says all excited

"Not at all. Probably the opposite. I want to skip making friends."

"That's a joke right. Is that how you try to be funny?"

"I am serious. I don't want to be friends with anyone and I have much memories."

"I don't want to disappoint you darling but your type is hard not to be friends with. You are like a magnet so everyone will be your friend believe me and you will not be able to avoid. Look at you, you just made two!" he says with that analytic tone of his again.

"Ha! No kidding!"

Who am I kidding I mean he is right. I am here because I came with someone and this would be interpreted as step one to be friends and here I am talking comfortably to him which is also a sign of an upcoming friendship.

"You are thinking now about what I said right, and you are agreeing." He says sarcastically because he knows that he is right.

"YES!" I sigh

"No worries. You will like it, I am sure. People will love you without you asking. You have a positive aura and that attracts people." he adds again sure of himself.

"Well, do you know by any chance how to make people not love you?"

"Why???" he exclaims

"Dude, I don't want to get involved in anything or with anyone. It bothers."

"Are you saying that you are bothered now?" he questions as if he does not know the answer.

"NO! I am an honest person so if I am bothered I will just leave." I say with the same tone as his trying to get him to believe me.

"You are not honest, you are kind!" he corrects me.

"And you are?" I say bothered.

"Now you are getting bothered. But don't, I am just teasing you. I mean you don't know if it is going to be nice or not until you try it. You said getting to know people bother you but then you said you are not bothered by coming here with a classmate and then chatting with me. It is just my point of view but I do not want you to spend your university experience thinking like that." he tells me patting on my head.

"Aren't you getting way too comfortable with me!" I say as I move his hand off my skull but he is just smiling.

For some reason I feel like a baby now. But he is right after all and I hate that. At this moment, my 'classmate' comes out.

"Luke!!" she shouts.

"Ann!" he responds.

I take the moments to save her name. I would be stupid to waste this chance or she will later know that I was ignoring her when she introduced herself.

"What are you doing here?" she asks with joy in her tone.

"I was passing by and I met your friend here so I thought I could get to know her." He responds turning his head to me.

"Oh! Please tell me you didn't bore my friend with your psychology readings." She says

He laughs and adds "did I bore you Jeana?"

"Jeana? I finally got to hear your name!" she says happily

"Wait, you just called her friend and you don't know her name?' he jokes again making me feel uncomfortable.

"No, I was waiting for her to tell me after I told her mine. I didn't want to insist when she didn't, I thought I might scare her." She responds angelically

"No! No you wouldn't and I am sorry that I didn't introduce myself earlier." I apologize.

"That is fine! Now let's get going." She says.

Luke bends and he whispers in my ear "didn't I tell you it will be hard for you not to make friends." He smirks the follows Ann.

They seem close so I ask "you guys are a couple?"

Okay here I want to slap myself that was a stupid question. Luke and Ann laugh as they answer "No! We are neighbors."

"Ah okay."

Ann adds "he is free if you want him." She tells me looking at him.

"YES, I am free if you want this big guy!" he jokes.

I get all red and I stutter "no…no that's not how I meant it. You just seemed nice together and …"

"Relax honey we are just messing with you." Ann says patting on my shoulder.

They are nice. We walk and I have no idea where we are going. Both of them are chatting and laughing and we are just walking. Luke seems like a big brother. Maybe he studies psychology according to the way he analyses people. But I will not judge people anymore let him speak for himself. Speaking of him he turns to me and asks "Want to join me and Ann for lunch?"

"I don't want to eat. You guys go let's have lunch at some other day." I excuse myself.

"That actually was not a question. That was me informing you that we are going outside for lunch and you are joining us." Again he imposes himself.

"Can you be meaner?" Ann says "be nicer to her will you? You can say no if you don't want to go."

"She wants to. I can read it in her eyes."

"Well I am free and Luke are you majoring in psychology?" I tell him with an angry tone "why do you keep reading people out loud like that. Who told you people want to be read like that, it makes them uncomfortable so don't do that as you please from now on okay?" I finish as I see that surprise look in his face.

Ann bursts into laughter and says "You deserve that big mouth!"

He smiles eventually then says "what took you so long to speak for yourself. I knew you would react like this…"

"I said shut up and stop reading me out loud." I repeat myself as I glare at his eyes.

"Okay, okay… I am sorry."

"That is fine. Now where are we going?" I say trying to loosen the mood.

"No idea, Luke is taking us since he has been here for too long. He knows where to head. Plus, he is not majoring in psychology. He loves to read about it though. He is majoring in marketing." Ann answers.

"Oh! That makes sense. I mean psychology would help you in marketing!" I comment

"Sure." He says

"Just one word?"

"You said I speak too much so I thought I should limit my words." He answers calmly.

"That's not what I meant. I just … you know you were reading me over and over again and I got bothered eventually. That's all! I didn't mean you should stop speaking and…"

He interrupts me laughing out loud "chill! I was teasing you again. You are so easy to tease which is so cute." he goes back to his old self.

"Stupid!" I say as I walk along.

Luke receives a phone call, he takes it and he seems to be having a meeting of some kind.

"Yes, sure I will join. I was actually on my way out to lunch anyways." He says this then ends the call.

"Who was that?" Ann questions.

"Someone you don't know." He answers boldly then he continues "I found a place to have lunch and it's going to be free Ha-ha-ha."

We walk couple of minutes then we are at this small restaurant. We are just following Luke. Even Ann does not seem to know where we are heading and I feel like a fool just following them without a word.

We stop at a table and it was already full. There were two empty chairs so naturally Luke asks me and Ann to sit while he gets another one for himself from the table next to us. We sit and it is awkwardly calm.

"Well, this Ann. Most of you know her as I have brought her with to me to some events. And this new one here is Jeana, she is Ann's friend and they are both freshmen." Luke breaks the silence.

Everyone is staring at us. I look at Ann and she looks back at me like two pries waiting for the beast to eat them. Someone addresses Ann "hey, do you remember me?"

Ann took some moments analyzing his face before she shrugs "Dan! Right? I remember you now. Oh god I was wondering where have I seen you before."

"Great that you remembered my name. How have you been?" the ginger guy asks Ann again.

"Just fine. I haven't been as busy as you guys. How's everything going?" she continues and I am just sitting there not knowing what am I doing there uninvited.

"Not much or else you would have known. Today we have a surprise, you came on the right time!" he exclaims then turns to me "what about you little one; how have you been?" he asks me with a look of interest.

"I have been trying to avoid people and I ended up being gathered with a huge number of them which summarizes my failure." I answer with a serious tone.

Now, everyone is staring at me and wondering what did just happen. I mean, I don't even know what happened so I don't blame them.

"Ha-ha, a funny one! I like you." The ginger guy comments trying to change the topic.

"Thank you." I reply with no emotion shown and I can hear Luke chuckles. I know he is laughing at my reaction.

"So, what is the surprise you have talking about?" Luke asks the

Guys.

"Keep your hands to yourself if you want to go back home with them still attached to your arms!" I say rising my tone glaring at the dude sitting next to me.

"Calm down cutie it was a mistake!" he says disgustingly.

"Is it a mistake that you put your hand on my thighs and start moving it as if I won't feel it?!" I exclaim.

Luke stands from his seat and asks me to change mine with his but I refuse.

"Honey, you are shouting that's inappropriate!" the dude says smirking as if he is proud of what he did "you will want a piece of me later and you won't have the chance!" he laughs disgustingly.

Luke is mad at him now and before he reaches him I punch the dude and knock him on the ground. I take the knife from the table and hold it next to his lip and say "so you don't mind me having a piece of you then. I want to serve myself!" and press on his upper lip with the knife until it bleeds a little.

I hear the guys shouting and asking me to calm down but who can listen in this state. They are all standing but no one is approaching us. Are they afraid or do they hate him that much I wonder. He is screaming in fear and everyone around the table are just there looking at me, maybe they think I am a psycho at this moment. Luke taps on my back then bends to tell me to stop. How couldn't I sense him coming? Maybe I was too deep in my thoughts and action that I lost my other senses. Anger gets the worst or me. The dude is almost crying. When I look at him trembling, I calm down. I go back to my seat to face everyone and they are still on their feet. They only sat when Luke asked them to. Everyone stares for a while before they clap and laugh out loud. I turn to Ann to find her paralyzed so I snap my fingers to wake her up.

"I am sorry if I worried you, I could not control myself." I tell her.

"We like her, she is in!" the ginger guy says and the others rise their hands as a sign of agreement.

"In what?" I ask still the dead look on my face.

"The club." Luke responds still having that surprised expression on his face and helping the knocked dude to wake up and clean the blood.

"I don't recall saying I want to join any clubs." I say to Luke ignoring everyone in the table.

"I told you, you are hard to not be around. This is just your day one, I can't wait to see how famous you will get." He responds all excited.

"Yeah. Some people get famous without bothering, not like others who are trying to fit it and stand out at the same time!" the ginger guy says looking at that bleeding dude.

"Shut up Dan! Plus, I cannot have her with us, she is violent!" the dude says.

I glare at him and believe me I intend to kill him "nobody asked your opinion you know!"

The guys shout "oh!! She is straight!"

I look at them then say "of course I am straight, did you think I am gay?" I say with a serious face.

They burst into laughter and they say "Girl, you are in there is no way we will let you off the hook."

"Are you trying to steal the light being all funny now, you psycho!" the dude says bothered as if someone took his place in his own world.

"I see that you still can use those lips. I didn't finish my job and I believe I should!" I say approaching him with the knife again and he jumps off his chair.

"Stay away you freak!" he cries.

"If you want to go home in one piece, I suggest you stop speaking!" Luke says to the dude holding me back.

"Now, let's please change the topic, Dan! What is the surprise?" Luke asks the ginger guy.

"Oh yes! We will be excluding a member but it seems the number will stay the same with this little surprise you got us." Dan responds giving me a warm look.

"A member?" Ann says 'can you do that?'

"I am the president of this club honey, of course I can. And since Luke is the vice president, I will consider that he brought Jeana as a new member and she is strongly accepted and welcomed!" he says clapping and his team follow.

I excuse myself to the toilet because it is the only place I can think straight. Ann comes with me to make sure that I am okay and also because for no clear reason, girls go in troops to the toilet. In there I wash my face then I hear Ann saying from behind the door 'Are you okay?' asking me all worried.

"Yes! Why are you asking?"

"You seem totally different from the girl few minutes ago." she replies.

"Why? Are you afraid of me now? You think I am a psycho like he said?"

"NO!" she shouts "I would never think of you like that. He deserves that. I was actually happy. You sound soft and innocent but you know how to fight for your rights. I was not scared, I was impressed!"

"Oh; okay. Thank you Ann. I just can't put up with people like him. I hate that kind of guys! I hope I didn't embarrass Luke in front of his colleagues and friends. Plus, they sound way older than us so I hope I was not disrespectful." I say while drying my hands and face. I get out to find Ann waiting for me with open arms. She hugs me real tight and says 'I am proud of you!' then we both go to join the table again.

As we arrive there, I clear my throat and utter "I am sorry for the discomfort I cause and I apologize if I was disrespectful in anyway." My head face down.

I rise my head to find only Luke and Dan at the table. I wonder where the others went. I hope I did not make them feel uneasy or sounded too harsh.

"Have a seat darling. I can call you that right?" Dan asks being all gentle.

"Sure, as long as you have clean intentions I don't mind what you call me." I reply sitting down.

"I like the fact that you are honest. And you seem like an active, creative person that's why I want you to join our club. You still can say no, you know and you can take as much time as you need to decide." He adds.

I look at Luke and he is smiling at me. I want help I don't want a smile you stupid giant. I turn to Ann and she directly says "just try it, you can always withdraw if you don't like it later. Right Dan?"

"Sure!" he exclaims

"Well, I will think about it." I say looking down.

Luke takes my phone and he saves his number without even asking for my permission.

"Now, you have my number little soldier. Call me when you set your mind to anything or when you want to hang out." He says giving me my phone back.

I just sit there and smile awkwardly. We eat our lunch and try to forget the crazy events that happened minutes ago. When we finish, Ann asks me to wait for her while she pays the bill. We get out of the restaurant and Dan leaves us first. We walk back to university and I am enjoying the silence and the weather before Luke just breaks all of that 'No friends huh' he says laughing out loud.

"Says the one who tingled me up!" I reply with frustration.

"But seriously, what was that back there. You were totally different but still cool!" Luke questions.

"It is just…"

"She hates pricks so if you don't want to lose a piece of your body, behave!" Ann interrupts me to answer him while holding my hand

I wonder if she thinks that I a freak. Luke seems to like it but somehow I feel that Ann thinks differently. Will she want to keep a distance now that I acted like that in front of her? Is my image ruined in her eyes? I keep thinking about these questions as I walk next to them. Luke is in front of me now holding me by the shoulders

"You are one special creature!" he exclaims and then hugs me.

Ann joins the hug and says "she is more than that Luke."

That warmed my heart and it made all those negative thoughts fly away.

"You do not hate being around people Jeana. You hate being attached to them!" Luke says out of the blue. I think he can't just keep his thoughts to himself.

"Where did that come from?" I try to learn what he means.

"You are pure and that is why you get mas real quick. That madness though is your charm, it keeps you safe and you know that so you are using it like a shield. You like hanging out with people a lot and the prof is that you are easy going but I am sure that something from a past experience made you hate that fact. So now you think you hate being with people while the truth is that you are afraid that you will get attached to them. You thought you could simply separate yourself from them and that would solve the problem. But honey that is not solving the problem that is avoiding the problem which is not good. In conclusion, you have to face your fears. Do what you love, be around people and enjoy their company. Just learn how not to get attached that's all." He finishes saying this then take a real deep breath. For some moments he seemed like he was giving a lecture.

It took me some time to grasp what he was saying, both me and Ann were just looking at him mouths wide open.

He snaps his fingers "Wake up ladies, I am taken!" he jokes

We laugh and continue walking. They drop me by the campus then leave together as they live at the same neighborhood. I am at the gate waving them goodbye as they are moving far and far away.

Luke turns around and says "Do not forget to call when you need me or even when you don't. Just call okay!" he shout stupidly.

"I will!" I shout back and enter the dormitory.

I could not forget a word he said that night. I think that it will not be that bad to make friends as long as I do not get too involved like I used to. I will try to keep a distance that's all. Now I have to think about the club thing, should I give it a try?