A Typical Morning

Sleep didn't come easy, but it did come. Robbie got maybe two hours before the piercing tone of his alarm jolted him out of bed. It was a horrible cacophony of xylophone, flutes, maybe a triangle? It was a noise so horribly perfect Robbie had to get out of bed to shut it off.

He yawned, dressing himself in some old shorts and the only sporty t-shirt he had. No shower: he'd need it more afterwards. He brushed his teeth though; he wasn't a monster.

Jess was waiting on the corner of the road. Robbie was too far away to know it was her for sure, but she was the only person on the street. Wearing a yellow top and black shorts, she looked like a rather long, frizzy-haired bumblebee.

She was a nice friend to have, Jess. Smart, lovely. Apart from anything to do with her personality though, she always wore something bright. No matter how garish, how disgusting to the eye, she wore it with pride, distracting anyone from looking at anything but her. For someone like Robbie, who'd rather not be seen even looking his best, Jess was a blessing. As visible as a Christmas tree on fire, she was just about as warm and not nearly as dangerous.

"Hiya!" Jess yelled as she locked eyes with Robbie. She was much too bouncy for 5AM. No doubt she'd slammed a couple of espressos before meeting up.

"Alright," Robbie replied. He couldn't match Jess' bubbliness. He wouldn't try to.

"Yeah, not bad. Hope this isn't too early for you. Just feels a bit safer, you know. No one on the roads, no lads shouting shit out of their cars."

"It's fine," Robbie replied. He'd only heard about half of what Jess had said.

"Right, shall we get going?" Jess asked, putting in her earphones. "We'll go around the park a couple of times, then stop back at yours."

"I'll see how I go," Robbie said, unwinding the awkwardly coiled earphones he'd kept stuffed in his pocket.

"Oh, come on, you'll be fine. You're tall."

"Taller than you." Robbie didn't like it when someone called him tall. He wasn't very tall at all. Just average.

They set off. Robbie didn't really have running music, or any playlists he liked. He put on a random collection of music someone else made once for a house party he'd been at. It was acceptable, generic music in case anyone asked what he was listening to. Jess let Robbie go in front, so he could set the pace. He tried to go as slow as he could without walking. Being slow was bad, but it was better than stopping.

They started the run uphill, along a straight, narrow street. A dull route, by Robbie's account. Uneven road underfoot. Houses all painted one colour, and when they weren't, it was because the paint was chipped, revealing crumbling bricks underneath. All the shops were closed at this time, their signs without light.

There was next to nothing to distract Robbie from the next ten minutes before they reached the park, nothing to stop him from thinking about his breathing, his pace, the stitch that was already building in his side.

Finally, something caught Robbie's eye. It was a sleek, black car, going at least forty in a thirty road. As it whizzed by, the driver honked the horn in three short, successive beeps.

"FUCK OFF" Jess yelled, loud enough to boom over whatever was playing in Robbie's ear.

As Robbie reached the end of his uphill battle, he saw Grand Park. It certainly looked grand, with the young sunrise stretching out its light over swaths of green. Thick trees rose high overhead, welcoming all entrants to the park with their arching branches. They stood firm and observant on either side of the path.

No time to stop and stare. Robbie knew if he slowed down, he wouldn't have the will to speed back up again. Strangely enough, he also didn't want to slow down because he was enjoying this run. Neither sweating nor out of breath, each step brought a brisk wind through his top and shorts. Maybe this is how it was for all those freaks who said they enjoy running. Maybe this was what Jess liked about it.

"Robbie?"

He barely heard the call.

"Robbie!"

There it was again. Louder this time. Still, Robbie kept running. Soon he'd be halfway around the park. After only running for a few minutes too. This must have been some sort of record.

A sharp jab on the shoulder finally caused Robbie to stop. Behind him was Jess. Doubled over, sweating, and breathing hard.

"Jesus," she panted. "If I'd known you'd set that sort of pace, I'd have stayed in front."

"What do you mean?" Robbie said with surprising ease.

"Oh, come on Rob, don't be a dick. You've been pacing it, practically sprinting since we set off."

Robbie scratched his chin. He had no idea what Jess was on about. Probably just making excuses. She mustn't have been happy with her performance and didn't want to be embarrassed.

He took out his earphones to better listen to her. Pulling too hard on one of the earbuds, the wire released itself from the jack. From the phone's speaker boomed a phrase Robbie didn't expect to hear again.

"Now tell me, what interests you, friend."

Mr Wonder's caramel tones echoed in the empty park. Robbie scrambled to turn his phone off. He fed the earphone wire through his hands, yanking the phone from his pocket. Encompassing the screen was Mr. Wonder. Robbie dropped his phone from his hands upon looking on the pale face of the strange magician.

Like a coiled snake, Jess' arm shot out to grab the phone before it shattered against the concrete. Shattered may have been a bit dramatic. At the very least, Robbie's screen would have cracked all over.

"Nice," Robbie commented.

Jess turned the phone over in her hand. The video was still playing.

"What's this?" Jess said, ogling the phone. "A podcast or something?"

"Just some stupid magician guy," Robbie said. "I accidentally clicked one of his videos last night. Feed's full of them now." He wanted to make it clear that he didn't watch Mr. Wonder. Though, through seeming seemed desperate and defensive, Robbie only furthered suspicions that he enjoyed these videos.

"Right," Jess didn't seem convinced. "Is this what you listen to when you run? I thought you had to listen to, you know, something to get you pumped. Metal, or EDM or something. But, if this is what gets you to that pace, I might have to give it a go."

"Yeah," Robbie said. Again, he was half listening to what Jess was saying. Mostly he was watching his phone, waiting for a moment to snatch it back.

Jess looked down at Robbie's grasping hands and gave his phone back to him with a kind smile. It crept all along her face, proudly showing her white, perfect teeth.

Sweet Jess, Robbie thought. I don't think she could be any nicer if she tried. I don't even think she's trying.

"Is it weird that I think he's fit?" Jess asked, twirling a curled hair between her thumb and forefinger.

"Who?" Robbie replied.

"The magician."

"Mr. Wonder," Robbie corrected. He didn't know why he needed to correct Jess. It had happened before he could even think.

"Oh," Jess winced. "Not sure about that name, but otherwise he's not bad. Very intense, older, nice eyes too."

"Whatever happens between you two is up to you two," Robbie said. He stuck his thumb at the park. "You want to keep going?"

"Nah, sorry" Jess replied. "I got my heartrate high enough chasing you up the hill. See you for lunch though?"

"Maybe, yeah."

Robbie had said maybe, though he didn't have anything else to do that day. After this, he'd have a breakfast of cereal and squash, not together, obviously. Then a shower, and the tedious walk to the Uni library. If he said maybe, that added a bit of mystery to him that otherwise didn't exist. He'd do these things often. Showing up late, not saying if he'd show up at all, blanking messages for days while staring at his phone. They were desperate attempts to be more interesting. Robbie knew that; he hated when other people did that, but he didn't have anything actually interesting about him. These small games were the only attempts he had.

Jess kept her promise from the start of the run. They didn't end up running back to Robbie's flat, but she walked him there all the same, dropping him off like a drunk girl after prom. He felt a little guilty leaving her to walk back to hers on her own. A little.

Disappear. Reappear. Disappear. Reappear.

Robbie had been watching the line on a word document repeat that loop for about ten minutes now. On half of his screen was the blank page he'd ambitiously opened with hopes of getting ahead on his work. On the other half was a webpage. The library search page, to be specific. He'd typed 'Memory and Disorders' into the search bar, but had yet to hit enter.

It was like a trance. Robbie hadn't been exactly doing anything else. His phone was off, he wasn't talking to anyone. There was nothing to distract him. Still, he stared at the glaring screen, entirely gormless.

This was nothing new. Almost a pre-work ritual to Robbie, he'd stare at empty screens after telling himself this was the day that changed. Things didn't change, he'd always be unproductive for at least half an hour before knuckling down and getting to work.

A slight flick to the ear awoke Robbie from his daze.

"Alright bellend?" said a voice so posh it sounded fake. It was a deep, low voice belonging to a tall, skinny lad.

Reuben. The only 'friend' Robbie had made in his first week at university, or the only one who'd stuck around since. Strange thing, really. Most people said the first friend you make at university is also the first one to go. Usually, the first friend is the one you make out of awkward need. No one wants to be the friendless one at uni.

With Reuben and Robbie, it was the same. Robbie had awkwardly shuffled over to Reuben at their first lecture, asking for a pen he didn't need before asking the usual icebreaker rubbish. 'Where are you from? How did your A-levels go?' That sort of stuff.

Since then, rich old Reuben had stuck around, even after solidifying a group of real friends. Whether he talked to Robbie out of pity or because he genuinely liked him, Robbie couldn't tell.

"You done that essay for Shlag yet?" Reuben asked, sitting down at the computer next to Robbie. By 'Shlag', he meant Prof. Schlaghellen, but that had been too tough for him to pronounce. Also, he laughed whenever he said 'shlag' in a mimicry of her Finnish accent.

"You mean the one that's due in like," Robbie checked his watch. "Twelve minutes?"

"Only went and got an extension, didn't I?" Reuben said smugly. "Still wracking my head on it though, genuinely."

Genuinely was Reuben's favourite word. He used it to end most sentences he spoke, like a verbal full stop. He must have assumed people constantly thought he was lying, the way he justified everything as genuine.

"Yeah," Robbie said. "Tough one, that."

"I know," Reuben groaned. He leaned forwards, rubbing the sides of his face with slender, feminine fingers.

Robbie believed Reuben looked a bit like an elf. His face was pretty and gaunt, his cheekbones high. His ears even had a slight point to them. Robbie had never shared this theory though; he didn't want to be accused of being a nerd. No one except nerds talked about elves, and Reuben was perhaps the coolest lad Robbie had ever been friends with.

His moment of stressful thinking over, Reuben leaned back in his chair. He started playing with the mechanism, lowering the seat until he looked about three feet shorter. Bored with that, he began to spin around, pushing himself round and round with his heels while Robbie watched blankly.

Robbie wasn't the smartest lad. He'd never got higher than a 67 in any piece of Uni work. That was partly in his own ability, partly in his belief every tutor had something against him. Even so, he'd always done better than Reuben, even with Reuben's extensive abuse of the extension system.

"What you watching?" Reuben said, his brow furrowing.

Robbie turned to his computer to see a dancing Mr. Wonder. Centre stage, a broad smile on his white face, he entertained fearlessly to what appeared to be a crowd of empty seats.

"Nothing," Robbie said slowly, half bewildered. He closed the browser tab. "I didn't have anything open."

"Yah," Reuben said. "Alright."

He had that look about his face. It was a look he'd often taken when speaking to Robbie. His head back, his chin up. It was a look that screamed he didn't want to be where he was. It was a look that made Robbie think someone was paying Reuben to be his mate. Why else would he keep sticking around? He clearly didn't like Robbie that much; he didn't have a use for him. By all laws of people, they should have distanced a long time ago. Well, except for one mutual friend.

As if she'd been waiting for her queue, Tara sauntered over to the computer cluster. Her face was stern, erring on the side of mean. She was unlikely to be angry though. One of the first things anyone got to know about Tara was that her resting face was simply stern. 'A resting bitch face,' some might call it.

"Alright boys," Tara said, fiddling with one of the straps of her crop top. Tara dressed as if she was going to a festival every day. She wore bright, psychedelic tops that never wandered below her belly button nor did they cover her skinny arms. If it was cold out, she'd wear white, flared jeans. Shorts if it was warm, whatever she could find. Usually, they were sports shorts. Wherever Tara went, her white bucket hat came with her, sitting proudly atop a perfected head of straight brown hair. It had once been a shade of pink, with tiny flamingos sewn into it. Now, after many years and many more washes, the hat was a shadow of its former self.

"Hello Bucket," Reuben said, pulling his girlfriend in for a kiss it seemed neither of them enjoyed.

Robbie flexed his fingers. He would always regret introducing the two of them. Tara wasn't the type of girl Robbie was usually interested in. She was posh, a bit too carefree and could be horrible to anyone she slightly disliked. Her family was rich too, almost as rich as Reuben's. Hell, she was basically a female version of him. Still, Robbie fancied the shit out of her, and couldn't stop.

"I thought you'd finished your assignments?" Reuben asked.

"Got exams though, don't I, dickhead?" Tara replied. "Can't work at home, too much fucking noise, you know. Anyway, going to go tuck myself in a corner and cry for about three hours before doing anything. So, bye!"

"Bye," Robbie squeaked.

"Oh Rob!" Tara said, turning with a smile.

Robbie loved her smile, how her nose scrunched up, highlighting the dark freckles littering her cheeks.

"Jess told me about your run this morning," she continued.

"Oh right."

"Didn't realise I knew the next Usain," Tara chuckled. "You should ditch baking, join that cross-country society, or athletics maybe."

"Yeah," Robbie said.

"Well, see you for lunch."

Robbie waved goodbye at Tara's turned back.

"Jesus," Reuben sighed.

"What?"

"One word replies mate, really? Don't tell me that's the case with every girl."

"It's not."

"Well how come I never see you with one? How come you don't tell me who you're chatting up?"

"I just don't. I don't know."

Reuben sighed again. "Ah well, you'll get there mate. Sorry, didn't mean to be a dick, genuinely. Word of advice though."

If I needed one, Robbie thought. I'd ask.

"Ditch the magician stuff. Or at least don't watch it in the library. Makes you look a bit... what's the word… childish."

With that, Reuben left Robbie in peace, only to go harass his girlfriend on the other side of the cluster.

Robbie turned back to his computer. That was twice now Mr. Wonder had appeared without prompt, without Robbie doing anything. It was strange.

His phone glitching, that was nothing new. The battered old thing had been barely clinging to life for a year now. A computer though, a library computer, how did Wonder appear on that? Robbie had read enough horror, watched enough shitty sci-fi shows to get his suspicions whirring.

He opened up a browser tab and searched for Mr. Wonder.

There he was, plain to see, nothing suspicious there. There was a video recommended to Robbie, the one he must have started watching while he was talking to Reuben. Robbie opened up the video again, muting the volume so no one could hear. The videos, there must be something in them.

Nope, nothing. Well, it was odd to see a man in a three-piece orange suit performing a contemporary dance. Apart from that though, nothing. As Robbie had known, there was nothing suspect going on in his life, nothing to steal him away from normality.

As much as he was odd, there was something equally alluring about Mr. Wonder. He had broken from routine, become whatever he wanted. Robbie couldn't relate, but he found a strange respect as he watched another video. In his strangeness, in his extravagance, Mr. Wonder was whatever he wanted to be.

Maybe he was worth watching after all. It was always nice being a viewer of someone who had next to no audience. There would always be a more personal connection.