Mixed emotions

2:00 am

Someone's phone is ringing. I open my eyes but I cannot get up. I move my eyes to see it's Ryle's phone ringing on my side table. I hurriedly pick his phone and turn the volume down because I see him sleeping peacefully on my lap. I don't move. Small part of me is thinking how crazy this is. We barely know each other and he's sleeping on my lap. But most part of me is thinking of how happy I feel, seeing him sleeping like this. The world around me is a blur. The only thing I can see clearly, is his face. He looks like a baby but with a manly face. I can't ignore the butterflies. I bring my hand above his head so that I can put my hand in his hair but I pull it back, what are you thinking Elsie? Stop. He must've fallen asleep while keeping the ice-pack over my ankle because that's what I did. It was so relaxing that I fell asleep. I don't want to wake him up. I just serenely smile at him and start fantasising my life again but this time, it's with Ryle. It has hardly been 2 days, but I have to profess, I've started liking him, not in a love kind of sense, obviously, I think so.

3:09 am

He's still sleeping but hasn't snored even a tiny bit. I am still looking at him and thinking about everything my life could be if I met this cute guy earlier. I was so happy with my little family that I never had the time to have crushes on anyone in high school or anywhere else. I was always busy reading something or if not reading, then I used to scribble in my little notebook while I used to imagine so many ways my life could be. I used to scribble so that the others don't make fun of me for daydreaming. My parents felt unreal, the connection, the bond they had felt unreal. They were so in love with each other. I have always wished to have what they had. They loved me so much. They homeschooled me for a while and then I went to school for a very short time. I had summer vacations and one day my mother had a call from grandma. She was sick and she wanted my mom to visit her. My parents had to leave the next day and I don't know for what reason they left me here with my aunt. The last I ever saw my parents was when they FaceTime me with grandma telling me that she's much better now and they are coming back really soon. I was eagerly waiting for their flight to land the next day, so that they come home and we could have all the fun nights again together but I still remember, I saw my aunt crying, sitting in front of the television in which the news channel was telling about a plane crash. I thought it must be some other country or city but when I came closer to the tv, I heard them saying names of the dead passenger and that is when, my world fell apart.

After some time..

I feel a hand over my cheek. My eyes are full of tears. I open my eyes and see Ryle sitting in front of me wiping away my tears that just escaped my eyes. I was so lost in my thoughts that my eyes were closed and I never knew when I started whimpering. I don't know what to do. I can't stop the tears, I am missing my parents so badly and Ryle is giving me comfort, this is what I need the most right now. My brain isn't functioning about anything at this moment so I just hug Ryle and shed away all the tears I have inside of me. He doesn't say anything. He put his hand over my head and I can't describe it in words how much all this means to me. How much comfort I have felt after 2 years because no one was there to wipe away my tears or to hug me like he is doing right now. He doesn't say anything but without saying anything he said everything.