Miserable lie

I slowly take a deep breath as soon as I reach the main gate. The scanner at the gate already let me pass though I feel a strong disappointment thinking about my lateness. The perfectness of my arrivals had been disrupted. I felt unworthy about my title as the "perfect student".

However I pull myself together. I shouldn't smear that image any more. I need to get myself together! I've got no time to linger on that small mistake.

I take out my pad and beam the screen in front of me. The blue light slightly reflects on the tiles on the floor as I make my way forward to the teachers lounge.

"Later than usual, miss Alex", the teacher greets me. It's Mr. Windsor. He's a stern old man who is perceived as the most strict teacher in the whole school.

I feel a lump forming in my throat. My mind screaming at me that I'm a failure. Even my muscles are out of my control now. Sweat is running down my temples and I have to clench my fists so that I wouldn't be shaking so obviously. I'm a failure.

Mr Windsor opens my arrival history on his pad. Always 30 minutes earlier except for today. My nails make their way deeper in my flesh almost to the point of making it bleed. Not that it changes the pain of that failure.

After a few seconds which feel like minutes are over he closes the history once again. Then he silently sends me the files from the other teachers so that I can organize them. Normally I collect them. But I was late. I feel sick. "After school in my office", he gives me a stern look. I only nod.

Silently I walk into the classroom. My mood has dropped since this morning. Everything should have gone as usual. But I have no time to fret over this. First I have to finish my tasks faster than usual.

"Hey Alex!", a voice greets me as I finish sending the files just in time. It's the voice of my friend Caroline. She's a small girl with a blonde bob. Her face is slightly round and her eyes are complimented by some cute freckles and her never ending smile. She never seemed to be in a bad mood which made my day a bit brighter.

"Hello, Caroline, how was your day?", I greet her back with a genuine smile.

"Oh the same as usual! And yours?", she politely questions me back. I usually like the calculatable dialog but today I almost flinched.

"Good as well. Have you finished your homework already?", I try to smile but it feels fake. Lying always makes me feel sick especially since my parents always told me that it could hurt others. But my anxiousness won't let the truth out of my mouth.

Caroline lets out a small chuckle: "You got me there. I still have to finish the last part of our math homework. Can you please help me~? It was so difficult I couldn't get it right". She then plops down on the chair in front of me taking my whole desk for laying down dramatically. I only chuckle at her dramatizing nature.

Though others are less amused by her behavior. As soon as her chin touches my table a book swings down and hits her head. The one wielding it is no other than Jason, another classmate of mine. "Stop bothering her highness!", he scolds the small girl.

"Her highness? Stop saying such kinky stuff!", Caroline chuckles only to be hit once again.

"Don't use such words! And such rude behavior!", Jason shook his head while turning red. I only nodded since I could see Caroline running into trouble once again. Her open nature was wonderful and refreshing yet it got her into trouble more than enough.

"You only put her on a pedestal you built yourself. I think the most appropriate behavior would be to treat her like equals, right?"

"Uhm… I-I guess you're right…", Jason mumbled.

"So how do I solve this Alex? Pleaseee explain it", Caroline smiled at me. My mother always called it the puppy face when someone did this. Although she declared it as inappropriate I found it cute and amusing.

Jason now saw right through her scheme: "Do it yourself!"

"But it's difficult!"

"It's for learning, that's why it's difficult!"

I only chuckled at the two of them bickering. It had become a daily occurrence since the three of us were the earliest in the classroom.

Caroline switched onto a new topic to divert Jason's attention: "By the way, have you guys heard of the incident?".

My head perked up. I hadn't had time to look at the news since I was late and then scolded by Mr. Windsor. Luckily Caroline seemed eager to explain so I didn't have to ask and embarrass myself.

"You know the incident in the west district? This criminal group called truth apparently destroyed countless government properties!", Caroline exclaimed.

"Pfft, 'Truth'? They only spread lies and hate! They are not even near the real truth like our saint Alex!", Jason exclaimed. Seeing that even he joined the debate made it seem like a difficult problem.

Still hearing him call me saint made me embarrassed. The me who lied a few minutes ago only to be presented as perfect. I clearly wasn't, I was even more flawed than others. So I at least tried to lessen the compliment since I wasn't worth it's meaning: "Please I am nowhere near the real perfection like our major".

"But you could be the future major! No one is as perfect and as smart as you are!", Jason exclaimed. He now seemed extremely enthusiastic. (958)

I only chuckled to brush the topic off. Thinking about such a high position made me feel shaky and ill. "But 'Truth' is still a weird name for a criminal organization, don't you think? It suggest that something is false…".

"Maybe the true face of evil", Jason exclaimed with an angry face. He seemed extremely unamused by this incident.

"Anyway guys, do you want to grab a bit on our way home tomorrow?", Caroline cheerfully asked as she put away her papers on which she had copied my solving of the math task. She truly was terrifying sneaky and manipulative at times.

"I can't I have an appointment with Mr. Windsor", I forced my mouth to smile a little and to not shake.

"Ugh that sneaky old-"

"Caroline!", Jason hit her head with his book again. The conversation then once again shifted to more school related topics until the teacher arrived.