15. Tell me

"You were crying." the words that left his mouth made her freeze.

"Why were you crying? Alexandra what happened?" The amount of concern and worry in his voice made her feel as if she was a little girl stuck in a whirlpool of pain and her cries of help were heard without her screaming.

"It's…" she sucked in a breath, trying not to let him hear her voice crack. "Nothing big. I'm fine." However the ghosts of her past forced her to hide away her pain even if he heard her.

Xander knew she was lying. He could feel it in her voice. She was hiding her broken self behind a wall that she thought would obstruct his view. But little did she know it was as transparent as a glass to him.

"You're not." he said, letting his emotions seep into his voice. "Don't hide from me. Please."

She was silent. The words he'd just said feeling like the warm comfort of a blanket in the cold wind. But how long will it be until it gets blown away?

"Talk to me." he whispered soothingly. "I'll listen to your every single word and complaint. Fuck the world, it's gone deaf a long time ago… You have me now. And it's okay to tell me-"

"It's a really long story."

Xander stood up from his bed and hurried to put on his jacket. "Wait for me." he said, "And keep your window open."

Before she could stop him, he disconnected the call.

As he was hurrying down the stairs, Liam, who was coming out of their study while whistling a tune, stopped. He raised his eyebrow. "Another hunt?"

"Nope." he ran to the garage without waiting for Liam's reply. He started his motorcycle, it's loud whir roaring instead of the emotions in his heart that were slowly driving him mad.

Alexandra sat on the swing chair at one corner of her room, facing the window. She had washed her face a little while ago to not make it look like she had just cried. But the redness of her eyes was still evident as ever.

She had an inkling of what Xander was going to do next. She was anticipating it but the nervousness she felt topped it. What if he gets caught? Should it really matter? Her parents brought Olivia and let her stay, why can't Xander?

She buried her face in her hands, her hair falling like a curtain over her cheeks. She wished that curtain of hair could hide away her broken self in front of Xander like it hid her cheeks, she wished her eyes could hide her pain in front of Xander like they did in front of everyone. But damn. Just her voice had been enough for him to know. So her strong front would crumble in front of him the moment he gazes her with that piercing look of his.

"Alexandra."

Startled, she looked up. He was halfway in through the window, looking like the Knight arriving to save his princess with the moonlight dancing on his sharp features. His eyes softened at her as she swiftly wiped a lone tear that slipped from the corner of her eye.

Taking a few short strides, he pulled her to his chest, his warmth engulfing her like a blanket. "Tell me."

Not a word left her lips. Instead, the tears that she tried hard to control pooled in her eyes at the gentle tone of his voice, something that she had longed to hear from a really long time.

He ran a hand through her hair slowly, with his fingers trailing ever so softly. "It's okay." he whispered, "Let it out."

And she did.

"I...I was almost raped."

His arm around her tightened, while the other one in her hair paused. He already knew this. He had heard it from her fight with those lowlives. But hearing it from her now, in that pained whisper of her voice, as if she was trying not to remember...fueled a rage so hot in his chest, he tightened his hold on her, trying not to let it show, trying not to scare her. The murderous thoughts running in his mind were worse than what he would give to his enemies.

He needed to get a grip on his thin thread of sanity or else he would storm right off to kill those responsible in the most brutal, most horrend-

"It happened a day before summer started." Alexandra clutched the back of his shirt tightly, closing her eyes to stop that nightmare from playing in her mind. Xander was right. She had to let it out. She couldn't keep bottling it up forever until it consumed her.

**(flashback a year ago... )**

(TRIGGER WARNING - mention of sexual assault and usage of drugs.)

The evening sky was slowly turning dark, slipping into the abyss of the night, the summer stars twinkling in the sky. Alexandra would've given everything just to sit a top of the rooftop of a huge building and locate the summer constellations and finish up her sketches of Adam Taurus and other stuff.

It was when life was simple. Before everything took a worse turn.

"I'll be back by..." Alexandra trailed off into empty space, now noticing her dad had already gone back in after her cousin. She'd had another fight with her dad after coming back from school, and he'd been refusing to spare her a single glance ever since. She had also decided to be stubborn and go out with her friends the very same night when Olivia and her family would be leaving for the UK.

"Alexandra, come on. We're getting late." Julian called out from his car. Casting one last look at the now shut door, Alexandra sat in the car.

Julian brought her to Josh's house, where they were going to hang out together, just the five of them. Or that's what she was told.

The moment she stepped in, she was hit by the stench of alcohol and some other things that she didn't even know the names of. Josh, who had been leaning over the coffee table with a strange white packet in his hand immediately got up.

"I thought you weren't coming." he said, coming to stand in front of the coffee table, blocking her view of it. He looked questioningly at Julian who shrugged with an easy smile.

Alexandra narrowed her eyes at Josh, leaning to his side to take a peek at the things on the table. "Julian convinced me."

It was at the exact moment, Della stumbled out of a room with a man looking to be in his mid 20s. She grinned at Alexandra, waving her forward. "You came! Hi!"

She looked incredibly drunk...no, not drunk, high. Her eyes were red and she couldn't really focus on Alexandra. A weird grin was on her face as if she was staring right into the world of her fantasies. Alexandra knew this because she had researched and made a presentation on Alcoholism and Drugs a year ago at school.

The white stuff on the table and the newly opened syringes and other things were definitely not the things highschoolers like themselves should have. Neither should anyone else.

Alexandra took a step back. "I think I have to go."

Before she could even turn on her heels, Josh and Julian grabbed her. "Not after what you just saw."

She struggled to get free, stepping on their feel with her feet or by throwing her head back, trying to hit them. Josh yanked her hand behind her back as her heel dug on his foot. "Bitch. You think you're so smart huh?" he and Julian dragged her to the room Della came out of.

Alexandra tried to twist her hands out of their grip but they were too strong. When she tried to step on Julian foot, he kicked her leg from behind, already anticipating it.

"Let me go." Alexandra yelled, trying not to scream in pain at Josh's tight grip. She glanced pleadingly at Julian who refused to look at her. "Julian stop this. Please."

A sob threatened to break out of her throat as they pushed her to the ground roughly.

"Quick. Inject her with the drug." the familiar voice of Julia ordered, holding out a filled syringe. Alexandra tried to get back to her feet, only to be held back by Julian.

"You don't have to go that far." he said in a hard voice. "Just scaring her is enough."

Julia threw the syringe at his feet, an annoyed expression on her face. "Still have a soft spot for her? Grow up." She walked out along with Josh, without sparing Alexandra another glance.

"Let me go." Alexandra said through gritted teeth, giving Julian the harshest glare she could muster up. He did.

The man who was with Della earlier walked in. The intoxicated look along with the desire in his eyes made Alexandra shiver in disgust.

When she was made a move to get up, Julian caught her arm and shoved her to the man. "Be sure to give her the scare of her life." he ordered before shutting the door on them, but the man had already begun his assault on her.

She tried to push him off but he gripped her from the back of her head, pulling her hair. Then he started groping her.

Disgust and shame crawled up her skin like a snake slithering up. She yelled, screamed and begged for him to stop, for her friends to let her out. No one listened.

She began thrashing wildly, her nails digging in his skin and her heels pressing on his feel. He was too intoxicated to even notice.

When he loosened her grip to unbuckle his pants, Alexandra kicked him in his groin and grabbed the syringe lying next to him. She stabbed it in his neck, drawing blood.

Seeing a window by the study table there, she ran to it. Thankfully it wasn't jammed. Just when she started climbing out of it, someone rapped on the door. "Are you done?"

She jumped down. Thankfully the room was on the ground floor.

She began running, her hand searching for the phone on her sling bag. She immediately dialled her dad's number.

He didn't pick up. She dialled again and again until her tenth try when he finally picked up. But it wasn't her dad who answered her.

"What do you want now?"

It was Olivia.

"Give the phone to dad." Alexandra sniffed, coming to a stop by the closed shop a few blocks from Josh's House.

"Oh you're crying!" there was excitement in Olivia's voice. "What happened? Did someone finally show you your place?"

"This isn't the time for it Olivia please, give the phone to dad." Alexandra pleaded, tears tears streaming down her face. She kneeled by the dark alley, the cold breeze feeling like ice cold shards to her exposed shoulder.

"No."

"Please. I'm begging you." a sob broke out of her throat, feeling as if the dirty hands of the man were still on her, touching her and tearing her clothes. "Please."

She heard Olivia cackle in content. "Nope."

When she was about to ask again, Alexandra heard a loud thug from the other side of the phone, followed by Olivia's cry. "I'm sorry I was playing with uncle's phone. I swear I won't touch it again Alexandra!"

Alexandra frowned. "What-"

"Please don't yell at me like that. I sorr-" another loud sound of someone falling. A chill passed Alexandra's spine. She wouldn't!

The next moment she heard her dad's furious voice. "How many times have I told you not to scold her?! She fell down the stairs because of you!"

"But dad-"

"Stop being a fucking brat and leave your sister alone!" the call was disconnected.

She called him again but he never picked up. Sobs of despair shaking her form, she called her mom.

"Alexandra? What happened honey?" her mom's concerned voice asked from the other end.

Alexandra couldn't control her strangled cries. "Mom."

"Where are you?!" Sophia asked, alertness in her voice. "Alexandra tell me where you are."

"The...the shop b-by J-Josh's House."

"I'm coming, don't go anywhere." her mom continued to speak to her, telling her not to disconnect the call and stay hidden somewhere. Alexandra was vaguely aware of someone else's voice along with Sophia's yelling at her not to panic.

It took a few minutes until her mom found her huddled by the wall of the store, with her clothes torn up and her hair disheveled. Tears were streaming down her puffed up cheeks and her whole body was shivering.

Sophia immediately put her coat around Alexandra's shoulder and pulled her close to her. Alexandra noticed Kenna Rhys, the vice principal of their school come out of the car hurriedly. She helped Alexandra into the car along with Sophia.

"What happened?" Sophia demanded softly, her own face stained with tears. Alexandra was too ashamed of herself to speak. "They...Julian.."

Kenna's sharp eyes turned to her through the rear view mirror. "Julian did this?"

Alexandra shook her head, trying not to remember the disgusting feeling of that man.

"S-someone else. I-I don't know." she sobbed.

Sophia embraced her gently after wiping her tears. "Shh. It's okay. You're safe now. Alexandra you're safe..." But she couldn't hear her next words. Her mom's face blurred, nausea building up inside her. Darkness clouded her vision and everything went blank.

** (end flashback) **

"They took me to the Vice Principal's house." Alexandra sighed, hugging herself. "I told them what happened after I...started feeling better. Mom immediately called the Principal."

Xander, who was sitting beside her by her bed, gave her hand a light squeeze. He wanted to comfort her, to make her forget that nightmare, he wanted to hide her away in his arms, away from all the bad in the world. She has suffered enough.

"He didn't believe me." Alexandra's smile was humourless as she looked up at Xander. "He said he wanted proof and threatened he'd expel me if I told this to anyone else."

The principal would be the first one to pay for turning a blind eye.

"You didn't tell Uncle George, did you?" he asked, already knowing the reason.

Alexandra shook her head. "I didn't want to. And I regret it. Not that he would have believed me if had told him." she rolled her eyes.

Xander brushed the tear from the corner of her eye. "Come here." She threw her arms around him, burying her face in his chest as he leaned his chin atop her head. "And now they brought her back, despite the fact that her father tried to kill us. The worst part, my mom doesn't believe a thing on what I said about Olivia to her. No one will."

"I do." Xander said firmly, clenching his fists. It was as if he was looking at the rewinded and rewritten version of his own past after hearing Alexandra. He had been really glad that the things they had in common could might as well reach the sky but this? He would've held the whole weight of the sky on his shoulders if it meant she didn't have to go through it too.

The mere thought of that bastard looking at her the wrong way had him in a murderous rage. To think what she had felt that night, the tears in her eyes and the danger she felt...those bastards were lucky she was in his arms right now or else they would've been wishing for their deaths, begging him to kill them.

"I believe you." Xander shut his eyes close, a lone tear falling from the corner of his eye. "I'll always believe you...because I know exactly how you feel. And I'm never letting you feel that way ever again."

His words comforted her in a way she never thought they would. There was pain and anger in his voice along with determination, as if he couldn't bear the thought of her suffering. She felt him press his lips on her forehead, as if sealing his promise.

A fear began crawling up her heart. As if he could read her mind, he tilted her chin up, his sapphire eyes boring into her brown ones intently. "Never." he said, "Never think that I'll leave. Nothing about you will stop me from getting close, in fact, it'll just pull me in. I'm completely enthralled by you. You consume my every thought and dream. How do you expect me to leave you when I'm beginning to get obsessed with you? Not in the disorder kind of way. Al though I don't think I would mind it."

The last part made a chuckle escape her throat. His eyes softened at her. He really wouldn't.

He stayed for a little while longer, his arms Hever leaving her. Silence filled the room, casting an aura of comfort around them. It was when she started getting sleepy, Xander decided to leave.

Tucking her in bed as if she was a little girl, Xander leaned forward to kiss her forehead.

"Tomorrow," he whispered, "it's a date."

Her lips curving up in a smile that was his favourite, she nodded. "You lost the bet."

Remembering his bet with Blake, Xander nodded, so glad on losing something for the first time in his life. "Yeah. I'm glad I did though."

"Me too."

The moment Xander got home, he called Tobias to his study. He gave Tobias the list of Alexandra's old friends along with the name of the principal of their school.

"Find out every single thing about them, from their dirtiest secret to their worst nightmare. Don't leave a single fucking thing...and also, bring Julian Summers to me."

Xander stood by the window with his arm leaned on the window sill, looking up at the constellation Draco.

"I have a task for you." he said, having noticed Liam's presence in the room. Xander's eyes blazed like the blue flame of the hottest stars, a feral look so dark shining in them. "Put a fucking bounty on them on the dark Web."