Nobody's monologue and human nature. [Nicholas Hawk]

Let's put this in October two years ago.

I had just finished the roll of paper-wrapped nicotine tobacco between my left index and middle fingers, all while leaning against a wall at the back of the school, past the baseball field.

With a trained hand, I toss the butt out of sight and take a TicTac peppermint to try to hide the smell of smoke from my mouth. I smell my clothes a little. It stinks of smoke.

Even if my father gave me in the last moments of his life some strong reprimand along with some beating in between to stop using cigarettes, it is not as if he could get rid of old habits so easily.

Barely a month has passed since the school year started and everything is already sucking.

Once again, my position doesn't change no matter what I do. That is why I take my frustration out of smoking. Within my remotest opinion, I reaffirm the words that were once said by a great sage: 「You reap what you sow」

Those words mean that I shouldn't complain about what I did in the past to earn the reputation I have today. Even if I stop hanging out with those guys, my positions as the party animal who drinks liter after liter of beer at parties or as the bully who might as well take on a mountain of guys just like me is not going to disappear overnight. the morning.

It is no longer my fault that idiots are unable to understand my words. I'm basically like a mob boss. The men have an unbearable respect for me that already has me fed up. Women come to me in mountains, calling me day and night saying they want to fuck with me.

This is my fault from the beginning. Although I don't really care what they say about me, I am concerned about the image I give to others about my older brothers who have just graduated from high school.

I used to have them here to cover my butt, but after graduation, I've been in everyone's sights.

My older sister named Christina Hawk (we nicknamed her Chris) is a star student who got a letter of recommendation for Yale because of her impressive grades and resourcefulness.

My older brother named Jonathan Hawk (we nicknamed him John) is an aspiring professional NBA player, while he was in high school he won championship over basketball championship one after another.

My twin brothers left a deep mark on this school and that makes me, Nicholas Hawk (nickname me), as someone who should stand out until his last day at school.

Well. This is from two years ago, actually.

I have already graduated from high school by then, being just a school year behind my siblings of the same age and facial features. But I guess to get to what comes after this, you have to give an initial introduction.

Although I did not leave a distinctive mark to proudly say that I am one of the "Hawk Triplets" in high school, that does not mean that there was too much difference compared to the performance of my two brothers.

I want to catch up with my brothers and with that goal in mind, somehow I entered the School of Medicine at the university, but that is history for another time. Everything comes at its own time.

So as not to make this too long. I will continue.

Seeing the autumnal red and orange of the leaves, being carried by a strong breeze. I was about to light my export Bic brand sparkler for another cigarette. But something told me to stop.

I had the feeling of being watched. And so it was.

I turned my head in the direction of that unseemly feeling that I was being watched. Advocating my hunch, not far from my position, was a girl. The person who called me here.

Blonde. High. With good curves. But she has nothing in exaggeration.

I determined the quality of this woman once again, with my simple ladies inspection method that easily categorizes any woman into three aspects that stand out to me most of all.

I'm not saying that I only like beautiful women, I may sound like scum saying this, but as long as she has a good body, she seems enough to me even though she is the most horrible-faced woman ever imaginable. The kind they could use as an unmasked substitute for "Swamp Creature" or "Deadpool."

But this woman came in at a pretty high level by my standard of what differentiates a beautiful woman from one who is not. To be honest, I like what I see, but I can't rush it.

This woman... her name is Sophia Miller, and she is categorized as a person of my own social level to the women of the high school that we attended from eight in the morning until three in the afternoon.

I took the trouble to come here since she is someone of such category. Unlike me, she could crush my social position just by being a woman. You know, from the scoundrel bitches who cajole men to do what they want.

I am not a dog. I cannot, nor will I fall for the charms of a woman whom I have seen up close for the last three years... less after having had a taste of that body at a party that was given at the house of one of my ex- friends.

All of her actions are out of the question to me. I hate this woman to the core, and I can't say I'll ever change my mind.

She is a nuisance all the time and she tries to use me as another of her sex toys. The good part is that I think I have a good chance with a girl from the cheer squad at this school.

Don't get me wrong, I know I will have said that I'm fine with anything that comes along as long as it's easy on the eyes. But even a bastard like me still has feelings and it's already decided who I'll be in love with.

From the beginning I knew what I was going to come here for. I wanted to ignore it. But in order not to further damage the image of my brothers, I decided to come. Joke or not, this girl has some very good connections abroad. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that she has a hit man under her contract to tell the truth.

I kept my lighter and cigar in the same box that I put in my pocket.

We make eye contact. And this woman, as degenerate as she is, tells me with a smiling face:

─Be my boyfriend. ─. Ridiculousness.

My lips purse at hearing what she had to say to me. It was all a waste of time. As she expected.

Of course, there is nothing in Sophia Miller that I want for a relationship. In other words, she is the literalness of the nickname "Woman of a night." Once you take a taste of her body, that alone is stronger than Black Widow's poison that somehow fills your heart with hatred.

The truth is that I do not understand how it is that I am the only one who has noticed that. Only that one occasion was more than enough for me to begin to hate her to death.

She called me, wrote, acted, all like playing the role of a girlfriend to me. I quickly understood that she only wanted to use me as her toy, and made my immediate withdrawal of cards on the matter. Gradually, her harassment reached the level where I had to beat up my old best friend for wanting to force me to be with this woman.

I do not want it.

I hate her.

My answer was defined from the beginning.

─No. ─. I said in my threatening tone of voice.

I turned around and left the place.

By then, he had no idea who Sophia Miller really was.

However, I still didn't stop my feet as I walked as the leaves rustled in my footsteps.

I also had no idea... of the mark she would leave on me, later on.