Abstaining/nightmare.
He pauses and raises his head to look at his wife. “Your ok?”
“Yes, I am. I just want us to talk...about something very important.”
He nods, and seats upright. She does the same, next to him.
Jamal looks at her with all curiousness, and also trying to read her facial expression.
“Today is a risky day for us to get intimate. I'm not ready to get pregnant, yet. I don't know if you agree with this, but I had to let you know.”
There is a more than a second of silence, before he speaks, “Ok.”
“Ok?”
He shifts towards her, and her eyes move to his movements. Did he even listen to a single word?
Myla, waits, and he brings his head into her. “I need to know every-thing. Tonight, you're going to lecture me on that. Next time, I'd figure it out myself.”
His breath fans her face as he speaks. She gulps, staring at his lips, then into his eyes, that are already looking back.
“Understood?”
She nods very fast.
“Good,”
He shifts back, and she sucks in heavy air.
“We'll pass at the mall, tomorrow morning, get food stuffs, with other house necessities. What do you think?”
“Cool,”
Jamal is naturally someone very dominant, especially when it comes to women. But, Myla is still trying to get used to that side of him, because she knows, there are decisions she'd make that he will not agree to it, and she won't just haken to every word he says, since she's also very bold in deciding things for herself.
He still hasn't said anything about having a child now, or not. This makes her sick worried about the day he'd suddenly decides to bring it up, especially now that he'll soon have control over her cycle.
...
The Next Day
“I've always known you didn't want us to have a kid, but this, this is too far! You crossed the line, Myla!” Jamal yells.
Myla's hands are on her head, scattering her hair in frustration.
“Stop throwing the blame on me! I should be the one turning tables, because you let our enemies in. I am grieving my own child. I don't need anymore trouble.”
“You can't grieve a child you killed. You're a shame to women.”
Myla's heart stops beating, and the next thing she finds herself on comma, using artificial oxygen.
Suddenly, her environment changes, and the house her husband bought for her empty. She stands alone with blood on her hands, and cloths; tears rolling down her cheeks as she hears, “I think it's high time we part ways.”
“What do you mean?”
“I filed the divorce papers.”
She looks down at a document in her hand. “W-what? You promised to stay by me forever. You can't give up on us, because I won't!”
She screams, throwing the paper away, which flies all over the room they are in, and someone appears in front of her fuming in anger.
“How dare you refuse to divorce him! He's mine!”
Myla laughs, and stops. “Then you are mistaken, liar! He's my husband from the beginning. You can't steal what is mine. You hold no power to do that. I won't let you into my house. I refuse to!”
Myla elevates from bed, breathing heavily, and due to the pressure she exerted when doing that, Jamal wakes up from next to her; concern being evidence in his eyes.
“Nightmare?”
She turns over and falls into his arms, which takes him off guard for a moment.
“Don't leave me, please.”
He kisses her hair. “I'm right here. I won't leave you.”
“But you said you will.” she sobs.
He frowns. “When?”
“In the dream?”
He sighs, not knowing what else to say. “It's just a dream. We'll get through it, ok?”
“I don't know.”
“I know. I know we will.”
“You sure?”
“Myla, we went through this before, remember? We parted ways, and yet, we came back together.”
She becomes silent. He brings her head out of his arms, and looks into her eyes.
“Do you want us to talk about it?”
She shakes her head.
“Ok, I understand. You don't have to be afraid. Listen, I admit things will not always go well between us as time goes, but I believe in us, and the love we share for one another. Do you believe that?”
She nods.
“Then you don't have to worry about anything, because even if you give up on me, I will never give up on you.”
He wipes her cheeks, kisses her forehead, and brings her into his arms; holding her firm, like the most delicate substance, nature has ever created.
“I love you,” he whispers above her head.
“I love you, too, Jamal.”
They stay that way until she falls asleep again.
...
At the Supermarket
“What about this? You like it?” Myla asks, her husband.
He shakes his head, and she replaces it. “Less spice, more vegetables.”
“What happened to a little of everything?”
He sends her a corner look, his lips curving up into a smile.
“I give up. I'm at your service.”
“Yes!”
She takes her choices at once, before he changes his mind.
“A lot of crackers for my guests, and I.”
“Myla!”
She looks at him innocently. “What?”
“Your diet. You're not going to misbehave under my care. I promise you that.”
“Babe, I'm just going to eat a little of everything,”
“Don't use my words to do mischief.”
“Jeeze, that's a big word.”
Myla's phone vibrates from inside her pocket, and she presses on the bluetooth speaker on her ears. “Ms. Grayson?”
“I'm at your house. We need to talk. Come quick.”
“Uh...sure, but right now I'm with my husband. Will make it up to you, soon.”
“How 'soon' is that, Myla. You've had a whole month free. We need to get you up. So, common, I'm waiting.”
She hangs up, and Myla freezes for moment. Ms. Grayson is right. She needs hasten up, but then, she can't just leave.
She walks around the grocery shop with Jamal for 30minutes more, before everything is complete.
“Coming here is one thing. Seeing what you came for is another thing. I'm so exhausted.”
Jamal gives his wife a remorseful look. “If we had to split and meet up, you couldn't have gotten a thing.”
She hits his arm. “This is not funny. I went through the whole place for these things, more than you did.” she directs her eyes to her carriage.
They move a little further to pay for their goods, and Jamal branches to get something from another aisle. Myla, refuses to wait for him as she goes to the cashier's section.
When the lady in charge starts passing their stuff on the machine, Jamal comes back, and places a package of condoms.
Myla pauses, and looks at her husband, but he's not looking back. The cashier lady smiles, and tells their payments.
Jamal sends his platinum card, that slides into a machine, showing green, before they are free to leave.
They pack everything up behind the car, and settle themselves at the front seats.
“Hope we didn't forget anything.” Jamal checks.
“So far, no.”
Her head is the still playing on how she'd tell her husband, about the condoms he bought.
Myla fears to use that thing, because it may fail her. She wants to abstain from sex on her fertile days. Not taking risks.
How is she going to upon this one up to him? She just didn't remember, yesterday to include this in their erotic discussions last night.
This topic won't be a short one. Maybe, at night, she'd bring it up, but right now, they need to get home first, so she could meet with her manager.
“We need to see a medical specialist. I've been thinking about what you said, last night, and it's good we meet one.”
Jamal wants to know more details on when to, and not to get intimate with her. As she must've given her own knowledge about what she has experienced, but there must be an update/changes about her system she may not have noticed.
This doesn't mean he agrees with his wife being distant during periods like this. He secretly wants a baby, but then, he's not going to go against her will, for now.
He's just going to keep being a man, and doing the stuff he's supposed with his wife, either being she's fertile at the moment or not. That's why he bought those preservatives.
While, Myla is trying the take the best birth control possible, condoms are not in her list. She loves making love with Jamal, but she wouldn't mind abstaining for a while.
It's hard, yet, the best for her. She doesn't trust other methods of birth control, due to their after effects. And as a certified doctor, she has had a lot of info about things like that.
No one knows. She can't make a mistake to be an irresponsible mother as she wants be able to give her best to them, though right now, her career comes first, being her own reason for abstaining.
“Are you talking about right now? Because, I have an appointment with Ms. Grayson.”
To be continued...