Chapter 7 What I felt

Don't be afraid of what you felt and let it be;

Riley

I was completely stunned from what happened to me and that girl Dani. I had to give in to how caring I felt to her. Her warm hug and smell that is calming, why did I give it to her my name?.

“Are you thinking hard again?” Justine looked at me, staring at my hands.

I look at my hand and my nails are barely damaged again from biting “Just look at where you are driving” I replied.

She quickly looked to the street before turning again which it was close and stopped. Were at her apartment. I don't know why I'm complete here at hers and not to get my own. Well at least she insisted on me being here. I got out of the car while she unlocked her apartment. “ Is it too much stress or just because of the meeting?. I knew you didn't get home last night so check you out.” she asks before entering her apartment.

I followed her “No, and I wouldn't tell. I knew you would look for me. So we have privacy now to talk?. I thought no feeling involved?” I talked back to her.

She didn't reply and removed her clothes, throwing it into the bin of dirty clothes. I watched her as she entered the shower and I prepared her clothes to wear also with mine. I was irritated and didn't know what to do for the next day and faced that girl again. I look at the clock and that's when I hear the door open. I stand up not minding looking at Justine. We've been like this ever since something was unquestionable to answer her. I enter the shower and hop to the bathtub,she prepares and I remember dani how her body looks when she's naked like this. I shake my head and stand up but I slip which made me scream a little. Justine burst in “ is there something wrong?” and she looked at me with concern that made me frown.

“Its nothing” I replied madly and stand again

“Don't talk to me for now” I barely said to her like a silence and walk out taking my clothes

“What?” She frown while following me out

“Didn't you hear me or you wanna make it clear?” I face her while putting my new clothes

“But why?” she said in sadly tone

“Question all of it, I'm sick of it. Can't you see yourself. We had a contract and that's all. Friends and does” I put out the blower from the drawer and dry my hair “if this continue I will leave” I state and look at her

“Fine and it's done” and she left me at her apartment. Then I heard her car drive off.

It made me laugh. I'm supposed to be the one who left, not her. I put the blower down and start searching for something hard to drink. I found most red wine but it was fine and I started drinking.

"Why Justine? Why do you need to have feelings?. I don't deserve that and I'm not the right person for that." I said to myself as I got drunk not knowing what time it had passed.

I started to dream that Dani was there and I couldn't move. I saw myself naked and she was wearing what I thought looked like lingerie. My hands were bound and I felt weak to her. It's my first time to lose of compuse. Is not like it made me mad or hurt my pride but to be exactly what I wanted. She moves closer to me from down to up planting kisses until it reaches my face. I saw her tattoos were so good and cool to her even in the middle of her breast.

Were about to kiss but I woke up and ended up kissing Justine.

It was shocking that made me sit up “Why are you here?” I ask without thinking.

“Wow, To make it clear it's my home” She answered back and stand up start walking to her bedroom

I look down and as if I'm becoming shy suddenly. Then blanket was thrown at me

“If your sleeping there use some blanket” and she close her bedroom door

I look at the lock. It was the middle of the night already and tomorrow. When I think of tomorrow I remember my dream. "What's happening?" I ask myself as I facepalm. Tonight I might not get to sleep again.

"What should I do? I can't face her like this or should I let it be?. " Thinking hard as I search for something to eat.

Truly it was a long night all I did was stare at the lock and eat junk foods.

I hear the door open and Justine stare at me like crazy

“Look at yourself in the mirror,” She said before going to the restroom.

I rush up and look at the mirror near the sofa. “Fuck, so fuck up. How am I supposed to go to work like this in a min” I said as I looked at myself.

Justine came out and started cooking. I run to the comfort room and wash my face. The eye bag is not disappearing.

Then I hear someone knock “Use this” giving me an ice cube. “Roll it at your eyelid and the meal is ready. I would leave first.” Justine said as she left me again.

I just looked at her as she left while using the ice on my eyes. It was fading slowly and started to eat what was on the table. I prepare myself and brace myself for how to face Dani this coming day.

I was nervous while walking on the streets and saw her at the front of the hotel while our manager is opening the door .I hate it, this feeling deep in my throat. Then she saw me as our eyes met and she was smiling. “What now?,I can't be like this” I said as I walked pass by her and entered the store as I tried to ignore her this day.